This will be one of the few non-FHR posts i make but I just blitzed The Wayhaven Chronicles du Mortain route to see what all the fuss was about and it's a good thing it was out of curiosity because if I was a reader with a serious investment in that relationship, I'd be so fucking mad lmao. I've never seen CoG romance option that is such masochism personified
Pairing: Felix Hauville/Male Detective (Julian Mendez)
Rating: Teen (13+)
Word Count: 3,388 words
Tags: Pre-Relationship, Falling in Love, Emotional Baggage, Mutual Pining, Fluff, Gratuitous Use of Felix's Empathic Abilities, Mid-Canon, Mid Book One, Disabled Detective, Mentions of Food Aversion
Summary: The search for their misplaced Detective leads Felix to discover some new things about Julian Mendez.
Read on AO3 or
Felix is sure that if it was possible, Adam would burst a blood vessel. He grips his phone so hard it cracks at the seams of the plastic. The Agency should really send Adam reinforced phones for all the ones he's reported damaged in the past. "What do you mean, he's not there?" Adam checks his watch, scowling at the time he reads. "The detective doesn't stray from his pattern."
This has so far proven true. It's one of the little things about the detective that baffles Felix. He's never known anyone to stick to such a specific routine, as precise as a well-wound clock. It might be the only thing Adam appreciates about Detective Mendez. It makes him easier to keep an eye on. Until now, anyway.
"He's not among the patrons within the bakery." Nate's voice is tense with worry even through the slightly tinny phone. He somehow manages to sound like he's talking through a tunnel. Probably has the speakerphone on again. "I've checked the Square, he's not there either."
"And he's not at his apartment?"
Mason speaks up. "He left this morning around seven, like he always does on his days off. He hasn't come back since."
Adam's shoulders are starting to reach his ears. "Is there any possibility of him being at the precinct?"
"Why would he be?" Felix asks, wrinkling his nose at the thought. "It's his day off."
It's a rhetorical question, mostly. He supposes it's a possibility. Detective Mendez has pulled a few all-nighters since they've been here, but he is pretty diligent about taking his free days, even if Felix sees him taking files with him on his way out of the office. The man works too much and, if the perpetual dark circles beneath his eyes are any indication, he should relax more.
"Find him," Adam commands over the phone. "Call me when you've located him." He hangs up the phone, his teeth grinding together audibly. He turns to Felix next. "Check the perimeters of Wayhaven. I trust you can make the circuit before noon."
Felix scoffs, rolling his eyes. "I could run it three times before lunch." He pauses, letting a little worry pull his smile down. "What if he's not in town?"
Adam frowns, his jaw set so hard, Felix would swear he could snap it clean off. "We will find him," he says firmly. "We cannot fail Agent Mendez."
Felix nods, a little curl of nervousness coiling in his stomach at the thought, and then he takes off. He's always been the faster of the bunch and the world becomes a blur of color and shape and light around him. There is something special about running at full speed through the wilderness surrounding Wayhaven. Or maybe it’s just that Felix has never been able to just run freely through a space since he’s come to this world.
The wind that whips at his face and clothes is bitingly cold, but at least that means fewer humans are out and about for him to avoid. It also means he has to hold on a little better to his hat which he almost loses three times on his trek through the woods.
If I were an overworked detective, where would I go? , he muses to himself as he zips past parks and bike trails. Julian Mendez doesn't particularly strike him as an outdoorsy man. He is just as likely to not find him. It would be just his luck for one of the others to locate him first.
Then he smells it. That enticing blood mixing pleasantly with the soft hint of rose and sandalwood and something like ivy that the detective always seems to smell like. It must be some sort of fragrance, but it doesn't chafe his sense of smell the way most do. He slows a bit, following the scent up to the cliff face. There are no trails leading here, but Felix can see the telltale signs of someone having made their way here recently. He brings himself back to a human’s pace as he hears the metallic clicking and steady beat of the detective’s heart. As he breaks through the copse of trees, he smiles at what he sees.
It’s a small clearing, barely enough room for the rugged picnic table that’s been wedged into the empty space before the ground drops off. Wayhaven sprawls out before him in the basin below. Perched on the table, sitting on the surface with his feet propped on the actual bench, is Detective Mendez. His back is to Felix, his attention focused on whatever he’s fiddling with. He hums an unfamiliar tune quietly. A messenger bag in deep brown leather lays out beside him.
Felix comes around the table, admiring the way the soft mid-morning light plays across the lines of his face. The detective is engrossed in his task, which Felix notices with delight is sketching the scene before him with a charcoal. He’s quite good, from what Felix can see.
He clears his throat. “Fancy seeing you here, Detective.”
The detective startles, the slightest hitch in his breath as his heart skips a beat. His pencil fumbles from his grasp and drops into the grass below. “Agent Hauville,” he manages as he takes a slow, calming breath. Then his brows furrow. “How did you find this place?”
Felix swipes the pencil from the ground and twirls it between his fingers, “I was in the neighborhood.” It’s not technically a lie. Besides, best not to let the detective know he’s being closely monitored. “I like exploring new places. I was just wandering around when I saw you.” He offers the pencil back.
Detective Mendez takes the pencil, his long fingers almost brushing against Felix’s, but not quite. Now that he thinks about it, he doesn’t think he’s seen Mendez touch much of anyone.
Felix hops up on the picnic table, mirroring Mendez’s posture. “Whatcha doing up here?” He offers the space another once over, doing his best not to look down at the view too much. “Doesn’t seem like this is a popular spot.”
Mendez puts the sketchbook and pencil down between them and Felix has to curb the itch to rifle through it. Instead he watches as Mendez pushes a few loose curls back from his face. “It’s not. I stumbled across it a few years back. The view is unlike any in town, so I dragged the table here with Tina’s help.” He leans back on his hands, rolling his shoulders to disperse the tension that normally sits in them. “I come up here to clear my head. I don’t think anyone knows about it aside from myself, Tina, and Sol.”
“And now me,” Felix points out, squirming a little in his seat as he realizes the intrusion he is here.
“And now you,” Mendez echoes. His tone is flat and Felix wonders what he actually feels about the situation. As if on cue, Mendez turns his head to look Felix over. This close, lit up by the crisp spring light, Felix realizes the detective’s eyes aren’t black like he’d previously thought. They’re quite a dark brown, shot through with striations of amber, like wood grain. Then Mendez’s lips twitch into something that Felix would almost swear is a smirk. “I’ll thank you to keep it to yourself, if you would.”
“Hey, I can keep a secret!” Felix protests.
“I hope so, Agent Hauville.” That’s definitely a smirk on Mendez’s lips as he turns away from Felix. “I fear your Agency would be at quite a loss otherwise.”
“You can just call me Felix, Detective.”
Mendez gives a little nod, “As you wish. It only feels fair that you call me ‘Julian’ then, Felix.”
Felix shivers a little at the sound of his name in the detective’s accent. He smiles, “That’s hardly a chore.” A sly edge pulls at his lips. "Or maybe 'Jules'? Isn't that what Officer Poname calls you?"
Julian winces, but there's an edge of fondness to the gesture. "If you must."
"Maybe just for special occasions then," Felix concedes.
The silence begins to settle between them, and with it Felix’s fidgety tendencies feel more noticeable. He tries to distract himself to keep from tapping his foot. He’d noticed before the grimaces Julian tries to hide whenever Felix gets ahold of a pen he can click. So he focuses on watching Julian out of the corner of his eyes.
The clouds shift above them, letting beams of sunlight burst through, playing across them like spotlights of warmth in the cool air. Julian closes his eyes, tilting back his head as one lands across him. Contentment rolls off him in waves. His lips curl into a smile Felix has rarely seen. Felix knows he’s staring unabashedly, but he can’t help but trail his eyes along Julian’s silhouette. He’s never seen the man look so relaxed.
Then there’s a soft growl of Julian’s stomach and his eyes snap open with a scowl. Felix laughs, catching Julian’s gaze as he does so. “Skipped breakfast?” he asks.
Julian’s gaze drifts away from him. He can see the gears turning in Julian’s eyes, like he’s thinking hard about how to answer. Finally he says, “It’s one of my bad days.”
The smile drops a little from Felix’s face and he sits up a little straighter. “Bad days?”
Julian shrugs, his shoulders hunching a bit as he leans forward. He fiddles with the cuffs of his pressed dress shirt, smudging black streaks across the white fabric as he does. He doesn’t seem to notice. “I have…sensory issues,” he says. He’s actively avoiding Felix’s gaze now. “Eating is a challenge for me on certain days. It’s as if the texture and flavor are too much, I suppose. It makes the whole ordeal…unappealing.” He spares Felix a glance before he sighs, rubbing his hand across mouth, slightly ruffling his well-trimmed beard. “That probably doesn't make a lot of sense to you...”
“I swear, you’re secretly a vampire,” Felix says before he can catch himself. He winces, throwing Julian a cautious look to gauge his reaction to the slip.
But then Julian does something Felix doesn’t expect. He laughs. He laughs with his whole body, his shoulders and chest shaking with the motion, and his nose scrunches as he closes his eyes. It’s a beautiful sound, deep and warm and oaky and filled with emotion. Felix gasps softly as he watches Julian and he hopes the quick thrum of his heartbeat is only audible to his own ears. Julian’s posture relaxes as he slowly stops, and he rubs the back of his neck as a red flush creeps down it. “I’ve been called a lot of things, but I think that might be my favorite.”
Felix perks up a little. “Do you like vampires?”
“I have a fondness for monsters and their stories,” Julian admits. “They may have started as metaphors for xenophobia and the spread of cultures unfamiliar, but vampires have a long history of symbolism as outsiders and those perceived as deviants by greater society.” There’s the slightest hesitation in conversation before he offers Felix a sheepish grin. “Besides, who wouldn’t want to be one?”
Felix turns away, scowling as he thinks of all the agents and Agency scientists he’s worked with in the past. He pulls his legs a little closer to himself, his shoulders curling forward, and he wraps his arms around his knees. “I don’t know. A lot of people don’t seem to like vampires.”
Julian bobs his head side to side, “I suppose it depends on what mythology you’re pulling from.” This time, when he wrinkles his nose, there’s a hint of distaste in the expression. “There are certainly some boring examples, but I think you could say that for most stories and tropes. My favorites were always the ones who could fly or shapeshift.”
“Shapeshifting is a werewolf thing.” Another slip, another wince. Felix wishes Julian isn’t so easy to talk to.
But Julian just rolls his eyes. “There’s a lot of overlap in mythological creatures. Trying to pin down one particular power to just one monster misunderstands the purpose of why we tell stories about them.”
They’re talking about two different things. Felix is aware of that, but he’s also curious about what Julian has to say. After all, movies and stories are one of Felix’s favorite things about this world. “And why’s that?” he prompts.
“Classically, to give form to our fears and insecurities in a way that’s recognizable to others,” he answers, that soft smile back on his lips. His eyes shine with passion. “More recently, especially in marginalized communities, we use monsters to explore ostracization and dehumanization. Some modern era monsters even reclaim their monstrosity as something to be celebrated. They draw attention to how we define a monster and the moral question of whether such a signifier is helpful to anyone. And, with some of the best storytellers, we see ourselves in the monsters, and come to understand and love ourselves more for it.”
Felix is staring, slightly slack-jawed, when Julian meets his eyes at last. Julian startles a bit, as though just realizing Felix had been listening to him. A deep, warm flush blooms across his cheeks and he looks away quickly. “Sorry. I seem to get a bit carried away around you.”
“Don’t be,” Felix answers, sounding a bit breathless even to his own ears. “I don’t mind getting swept up with you.”
And then the blush on Julian’s face is more than just embarrassment. It starts creeping up to his ears, just visible beneath the tangle of curls around his face. Felix wonders if so few people have flirted with Julian. It feels preposterous. He’s quite easy on the eyes, if a little imposing upon first impressions, and when he talks about his interests, he alights like stars in the clear night.
He knows he shouldn’t, but Felix has never been one to not take risks, and this is such a small one in comparison. Sliding his hand a little closer across the table, he brushes his little finger against Julian’s. He watches Julian’s gaze flick down to the touch, his expression infuriatingly unreadable behind the mask he’s erected. But then his expression softens, ever so slowly, like watching water run down the icicles that hung outside the windows of their base that early spring they stayed in Colorado. He hooks his little finger around Felix’s, stilling them both, and he tilts his head slightly towards Felix.
His expression gives away little, but Julian feels emotions like a radio turned up just too loud for Felix’s empathetic senses. He feels himself losing his footing in the stream of it and, instead of fighting it, Felix lets the undertow pull him into the depths of Julian. He feels like loneliness and isolation so often - cold and profoundly deep and ancient as the oceans - but there is more deeper in the blue. There is warmth like volcanic vents, giving life to passion and drive and something small that Felix has to pay closer attention to in order to realize its name. There is hope there, cracked and brittle under the pressures around it, but bolstered by the attraction that tastes sweet on Felix’s tongue. Would he drown here, in the currents of Julian’s heart? Could he, knowing that as soon as they catch Julian’s hunter, he will be gone with the rest of his team?
Looking into the cautious tenderness in Julian’s dark eyes, catching the way his lips part slightly with words unspoken, Felix doesn’t know what the right answer should be. He does, however, know exactly what he wants the answer to be.
The shrill chime of his phone causes both to jump and Felix pulls his hand gently away to fish the phone from his pocket. He gets to his feet, swearing quietly as he reads Adam’s name across the screen, and walks a few steps away from the table to answer it. “What’s up?”
“Have you found the detective?” Adam’s voice is tense, strained, and Felix can just hear him holding back a snap.
Felix’s eyes trail back to Julian, and he smiles as he notices Julian has picked up his sketchbook again, his focus on the paper instead. “Yeah, everything’s good.”
“I asked that you check in should you find the detective. As soon as you should find him.” Felix wonders idly if today will be the day Adam snaps his phone. It would be the first one of the mission and a new record. “Why, precisely, did you not report in?”
“Oh, would you relax?” Felix feels eyes on him and he glances over at Julian. Julian is still sketching, casting his eyes up every few seconds back to Felix, and suddenly Felix is overwhelmed by the need to know what Julian is drawing. “I just said it’s all good. I’ll give you the rundown when I get back, okay?”
“No, Felix, you will-”
Adam’s voice comes to an immediate halt as Felix clicks the call off and then turns his phone to silent. He’ll deal with that burning bridge when the fire spreads. He throws Julian an apologetic smile, “Sorry about that.”
“No need to apologize,” Julian says, and he slips his sketchbook and pencil back into his messenger bag. “We should both get back to it, I suppose.”
Felix deflates a little as he watches Julian stand up. “Isn’t it your day off?”
Julian shrugs, “The weary should not know rest so as the wicked may not know peace.”
“That’s a miserable saying,” Felix says, wrinkling his nose. “The weary should rest so they don’t burn out. And because it’s fun.” He throws his arms out wide for emphasis, but he forgot how close he was to the edge, and the motion pushes him off balance.
"Felix!" The air smells like adrenaline and tastes of panic, and Felix tries and fails to stifle the urge to course correct. He manages to push himself forward with what little footing he has left and feels Julian’s hand close around his wrist just before he crashes into Julian’s chest.
Julian’s other arm wraps around him, pulling him tight as they fall. Julian groans as they hit the ground, but he doesn’t loosen his hold on Felix. They lay there, clinging to each other as they catch their breath and steady their heartbeats again.
"Are you okay?" Julian asks in a ragged tone.
Felix pushes himself up a little to look at Julian's face. There's a mixture of worry and relief etched into his features. "Yeah," he manages to gasp. He glances back to the ledge. "We're lucky we didn't both go over."
"That…that would have been unfortunate."
Felix can't help the snort of laughter that escapes him, "Yeah, that would have been a word for it." He rolls himself off the detective, though he feels colder immediately upon doing so, and gets to his feet.
He offers his hand to Julian, who raises an eyebrow at him. Felix supposes it does feel like an absurd gesture given the difference in height. Julian takes his hand anyway, but Felix can tell he's mostly standing up on his own. "Do me a favor," Felix says with a bashful smile. "Don't tell the others about this."
"It'll be our secret," Julian says with a soft chuckle. "And, please, be careful in future. I can't always be around to catch you when you fall."
Felix raises an eyebrow, searching Julian's expression for any sign of tease or flirt, but finds nothing but earnest worry. The genuine care makes Felix smile wide. "No worries, I know how to take a fall." He gazes back the way he first arrived as Julian pulls his messenger bag over his shoulder. "Do you mind if I join you on your way back?"
"Quite the opposite," Julian says, waving Felix to follow. "I rather like your company, Felix."
Felix falls into step with the detective, nudging him lightly with an elbow, “You’re not so bad yourself, Jules.”
Julian presses his lips into a thin line, but doesn’t say anything about the nickname. As Felix watches him out of the corner of his eye, he can just catch the twitch of an amused smile barely held back.
I’m not sure if you’ve already made a post about this (I’m sorry if you have) but would you mind telling us about your detective in Wayhaven?
-transsidestep
@transsidestep Thank you for the ask! I haven't, actually. I have one for each of UB, but Mason and Nate's are still being fleshed out and worked upon, so I'll tell you about the other two.
Julian Mendez:
Deduction and science-leaning with atrocious people skills and just enough self defense knowledge to get by
He's a very stoic and intimidating person upon first blush, and can be pretty hard to get to know due to quite a bit of trust issues. But once he sees you as part of his family, he'd move the earth and stars for you.
His and Rebecca's relationship is incredibly prickly. Julian values honesty pretty highly, which meant the secrets Rebecca keeps kept the rift between them pretty wide. As a child, he wanted for nothing materially, but he's never really forgiven her for not being there personally.
He fell for Felix pretty hard. It started off as attraction, something which he tried to ignore given that he knew UB's stay was only temporary, but they're both incredibly passionate individuals who see the world in unique ways. Their weirdness gels really well.
He's also chronically ill. SLE and a heart defect that devolved into needed a mechanical valve. He also has occasional bouts of over-stimulation and food aversion.
Instead of being a beat cop with Tina, he was actually a forensic pathologist with Verda. He calls him Sol.
He begrudgingly accepted the nickname "Jules" from Tina. Felix calls him that because he thinks it's cute and because Julian is a sucker for him. Nate accidentally picked it up, but Julian hasn't had the heart to tell him otherwise.
Grew up speaking both English and Spanish and so his accent is a little odd to most people in Wayhaven. Has a tendency to break into Spanish when really embarrassed or really upset.
Raine Callaghan:
The eldest of my detectives at the grand age of 39. The events of the books expedite his progress towards a silver fox.
His highest skills are combat and psychology and it really shows. He's a bit of a loveable rogue archetype, charming and a bit smarmy, prone to sarcasm. He hides his anxieties behind humor.
He and Rebecca used to have a decent relationship when he was younger (he's actually her stepson - Rook died when he was about 8 years old), but have drifted apart since Rook died and Eoin (Rebecca and Rook's son) got hospitalized. They might could fix their relationship if they could learn to talk to each other again.
Grew up in Belfast during the Troubles. He hides his accent after some nasty interactions upon Rebecca first moving him out to London. The more he hangs out with Unit Bravo, the more he falls back into it. It has a lot to do with trust and feeling safe.
He is the bane of Adam's job for a good while. They butt heads quite a bit early on, both finding the other to be an arrogant bastard, and only really become friends over the course of late Book One and throughout Book Two. They don't start falling for each other until Book Three. They are both find the other attractive early on, but shelf the attraction in lieu of their rivalry.
Comes across a little foolhardy and easygoing, but he's actually quite clever and exceptionally protective of his friends. One of the first things that wins Adam's respect is his willingness to stand up for the team as well as his drive when it comes down to brass tacks.
After the Bobby-plagiarism fiasco in college (which led to him dropping out), Raine decided if everyone was gonna see him as a troublemaker, he'd best start making trouble. He became quite the prolific con artist, with a heavy leaning into pickpocketing and some minor carjacking. It was join the force or go to jail - he reluctantly opted for the force.
His full name is actually Ciaran. Legally changed it in college for spiteful reasons. Kind of regrets it now. He tells it to Adam at the end of Book Two. Once they're on first name basis, Adam uses it when they're alone.
Just because I feel like being an vindictive little shit, I've decided the "We can only have this moment" Adam line actually exists not in the Adam/Detective scene, but in the one night stand he and Nate had centuries ago that still hangs over them like an albatross in the LT storyline
Title: We Can Stay Here If You Want (But Is It Worth It?)
Pairing: Adam du Mortain/Male Detective (Raine Callaghan)
Rating: Mature (17+)
Word Count: 5,457 words
Tags: Mid-Canon, Mid Book Three, Pre-Relationship, Rivals to Friends to Lovers, Learning to Trust, Falling in Love, Emotional Baggage, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Mutual Pining, Past Violence, Discussions of Trauma, Mentions of Addictions, Non-Sexual Intimacy
Summary: It was just supposed to be a drive, a little distraction from the aches and boredom. Raine hadn't planned for epiphanies.
Read on AO3 or
In the weeks after being relegated to what amounts to house arrest, Raine is about ready to give into the cabin fever that’s been itching under his skin for the last few days. He doesn’t generally see himself as an impatient man. Quite the opposite. The years at the Wayhaven Police Station have taught him the valuable lesson of being able to sit through the quiet weeks. But the last few months have been a taste of old habits, much like smoking, and without the rush of another mission, Raine finds himself jonesing for some excitement.
Working with Unit Bravo offers him brief moments of reprieve, in the times that they aren’t away on patrol or hunting down Trappers. But between their jobs and Raine’s persistent insomnia, it feels he has most hours to himself in the warehouse. He has, in a few weeks, watched every movie of Felix’s that caught his eye, read any book in Nate’s library that seemed important or interesting, and entirely mapped out the floor plan of the warehouse. He has resorted to finding the best spots to watch the day pass by. Ironically, this is how he discovered Mason’s favorite patch of the roof to smoke on.
As afternoon passes into evening, Raine clambers up onto a patch of the roof opposite of Mason’s usual spot. He winces as the strain reminds him of the bruises that are slowly turning a more palatable color. Most of the lacerations have healed at this point, but Raine still feels sore. So he lays out on the roof for a second, taking a few deep breaths to steady his racing heart. He sits up and gazes out over the trees. There’s a good clearing between the leaves to see the sunset from here, even if it will be a little obscured.
Just as he sits up, movement through the underbrush catches his eyes. He glances down to see Adam walking along the path. He’s dressed in a plain powder blue tee and simple black trousers and Raine cocks his head as he realizes the vampire is hauling a bucket beside him. What on Earth? A sly smile tugs at Raine’s lips as he realizes Adam hasn’t noticed him yet.
It may have been years since he’s done anything like it, but Raine still remembers how to cross a rooftop quietly. He crosses over to the corner nearest the path Adam is traveling and, swinging down, drops to the ground with a roll. Even with his bruises, he manages a smooth landing. Adam just barely manages to keep soapy water from sloshing out of the bucket he’s carrying.
"Detective!" it’s not quite a shout, but it’s as close to one as Raine thinks he’ll ever get. He grins as he watches Adam struggle to rebalance the bucket, a few fluffy clouds of soap drop from the edges.
Raine reaches out to help steady the large bucket. This close to Adam, he can see the vampire scrambling to regain his composure. “I’m sorry, but did I catch the great du Mortain by surprise?” Raine chuckles as the usual frown settles on Adam’s face. “You should be careful. What would have happened if I had been a Trapper?”
“I would have neutralized the threat, regardless of surprise,” Adam returns, not even hesitating.
“So you were surprised?” Raine cocks an eyebrow, grin growing wider.
Adam scoffs, pulling the bucket from Raine’s grasp, and moves around to continue on his way. Unwilling to let go of this exciting new way to defeat his boredom, Raine follows after him. With his height advantage, it's easy to keep up with the brisk pace Adam keeps.
He glances towards the bucket of sudsy water and back up to the commanding agent's impassive face. "What exactly are you up to that has so much of your attention?"
A rare smile lifts Adam's lips. The sight of it softens Raine's grin to a smile of his own. It's not often he lets himself linger on the fact that Adam is quite handsome. But in the dappled light of the woods and with the warm expression on his face, Raine doesn't resist burning the sight into his memory.
"I've been indulging in something I have not had the chance to do in decades," Adam admits, his posture straightening even further. There's something akin to delight sparkling in his green eyes.
"I'm glad to hear it," Raine forces his eyes forward for a moment. It wouldn't do to stare, even if he's made no secret of his attraction. "Nate tells me it's been some time since any of you really had a home."
"Perhaps a century, at the very least," Adam admits.
Raine rubs the back of his neck, grateful he'd had the wherewithal to tie up his long hair in the late spring heat. He chews on a few words before extending an olive branch. "I've never been without for quite that long," he chuckles, though it rings a little hollow even to his own ears. "But I know how that can disrupt a life. I'm glad you all finally have the stability to pursue your interests."
It takes a moment for Raine to realize Adam had come to a dead stop. He pauses on the path, turning to look at the man. Adam purses his lips, seeming to battle with a sudden thought, before he gives a short nod. "Would you care to see?" he asks with a tentative strain to the question.
Raine stares back at Adam, trying to discern what is going on. But Adam's expression is open and relaxed and Raine can't help the smile that begins to tug at his lips. "What you're working on?" He asks. He waits for Adam to nod before saying, "Lead the way."
There's a flash of something across his face that Raine would almost call relief, but it's gone the next second. "This way." And then he starts off again.
Raine keeps pace with him again, taking in their surroundings as they head away from the dilapidated front for the warehouse. Despite his recent free time, he didn't get around to exploring the outside of the warehouse proper. He hadn't noticed the small building with the red tile roof tucked away behind the trees and shrubbery. It's been updated more than the larger buildings around it.
He raises his eyebrows at the tarped-over hole in the roof and newly reinforced door. "I had no idea this was hiding back here."
"Neither did I until a few weeks ago," Adam states. "Come. I'll show you what's inside." He puts the bucket down and swings open the heavy doors with ease.
Sunshine floods the interior, bathing the large covered object inside in golden light. Raine waits as Adam steps forward. He grips the cover and yanks it off, throwing up a small plume of dust.
Beneath the material gleams a sleek, curvy antique car painted a deep green. Raine steps into the little garage, his jaw going slack as he recognizes the model. Adam doesn't even bother to look up as he smooths a hand over the bonnet.
"What do you think?" he asks, his gaze trailing across the curvy body of the car with pride.
"I think this is a Rolls Royce Silver Dawn," Raine says a little breathlessly. If he had any less shame, he might have sounded close to ecstasy. His eyes roam over the car. He hasn't felt this giddy in years. "That’s a drophead coupé."
An actual chuckle escapes Adam as Raine circles the car. "It is," he says, and Raine catches the pride that drips off the two words.
"There are only, what? About a hundred of these custom?" Raine takes care not to touch it, though it is incredibly tempting.
"Only about sixty, actually. This one is from the original first manufacturing," he admits, patting the car as though it's done a good job.
"And she's all yours."
Raine glances up to catch the smile that grows on Adam's face in the wake of his enthusiasm. "Yes, it's mine. One of my rare purchases."
"She's drop dead gorgeous," Raine straightens up, shaking his head slightly. "But I have to say, I didn't peg you as a car enthusiast. Thought material goods didn't hold much value for you."
"And your assessment would be mostly correct," he replies. "Physical objects hold little worth to me, but even I have some weaknesses."
The last few words stumble out of his mouth as though he didn't mean to say them aloud. His green eyes flash to Raine and back to the car, but Raine does him the kindness of pretending not to notice. It does bring a wistful smile to his face. It’s good to know Adam feels as comfortable around him as he does in the vampire’s presence.
"So, did you used to drive her?" Raine asks, graciously dragging the conversation back around to something Adam's a little more comfortable with. "Back before the SUV's became Agency standard?"
"I did," Adam says. He smiles fondly at the car as he runs a rag over her bonnet. "It's been in storage since the transition. There has been no opportunity or cause to bring it out. But now that we have a home, thanks to you…" He nods at Raine with a soft gaze, catching him off guard. "I can have it in my care once more."
"That's hardly my doing," Raine says with a laugh. It's unusual for Adam to be so casually sentimental and it makes something flutter pleasantly in Raine's chest. It also makes a frown tug at his lips, but Raine catches it so that it’s little more than a twitch in his cheek, not wanting to break the moment. Better to return to the norm. "Though I'm sure I appreciate the gratitude more than Murphy would."
Adam winces slightly at the mention of Murphy, but doesn't say anything of it. If he notices Raine itching the scar on his wrist, half-hidden by the leather cuff he wears over it, he doesn't mention it, either.
Silence reigns between them and Raine silently swears at himself for his poor choice in joke. He should have known better than to bring up Murphy. Failure doesn't sit well on Adam's shoulders, but weighs heavier than an albatross, bringing the tension back into his posture. Raine looks away, mentally scrabbling for something to break the weight between them.
"Would you care to go for a drive?"
Raine's attention snaps up to Adam, his train of thought spectacularly derailed. He searches Adam's expression, looking for any sign that the question is more for courtesy than a genuine suggestion. There is an earnest light in his green eyes, a softening in his usually stoic features, and Raine swallows hard as he finds nothing but quiet hope in Adam's posture.
The thought makes a smile so wide it hurts break across Raine's face. "That's not even a question," he says, excitement bleeding into his voice. He doesn't wait for further invitation, just opens the door and slides onto the cream leather.
Adam laughs, a deep and throaty sound that rumbles from deep within his chest, and Raine makes a note to see if he can draw the laugh from him again in future. He watches out of the corner of his eye as Adam snaps his aviators on and sits down in the driver's seat. They’re both a little too broad and a little too tall for the Rolls and Raine finds himself having to press closer to Adam than he imagines the older man would prefer. But if it bothers him, Adam doesn’t mention it.
"I'm surprised you didn't ask to drive it," Adam admits as they pull out of the shed and into the lowering sun.
Raine snorts. "It's been, what? Decades since you drove her? You would have never agreed." He tilts his head back, letting the sun and gentle breeze break over him. "I'm no fool, du Mortain."
"I suspected as much," Adam says, shooting him a glance and the second cousin of a smirk. "Despite how you may cultivate that opinion in others."
Raine raises an eyebrow at Adam, but doesn't say anything in response. He had previously been certain Adam saw him as just as reckless and foolhardy as most others do. He's mildly impressed, though he'd never admit it aloud. Can’t let Adam win too often. Bad for his ego.
Instead, he shifts his gaze out to the wall of trees they maneuver through. "So where are we off to, exactly?"
"I haven't the slightest," Adam admits. Raine expects him to sound tense about that, but instead there's a hint of excitement in his voice. "We shall have to see where the road leads us."
"Never thought I'd see the day when you didn't have a plan," Raine admits.
"Not everything requires a plan."
Raine bites back a sarcastic retort, unwilling to break the strange spell of calm between them. Perhaps not everything needs to be a battle between them. He's willing to accept the temporary ceasefire, this strange foray into no man’s land. Especially if it means he gets to watch Adam slowly relax as they reach the road.
He lets out a contented sigh as the ride smooths out on the pavement. Raine leans his head back once more, smiling as the breeze whips gently at his messy bun and the sun warms his face. The sky is changing from blue to a rich plum and Raine almost mourns the fact he will likely be missing the sunset.
However, when he steals a glance at Adam again, he finds it's a fair trade. The vampire has one arm leaning on the wound down window, the other lazily resting on the steering wheel. His shoulders are relaxed and there's a ghost of a smile on his lips. Wind tousles his short blonde hair, giving him an almost roguish appearance. Raine is more than willing to trade one sun for another.
They wind gently through the woods for a ways before Raine catches sight of a familiar side road. He leans over and suggests, "We should take this one."
Adam takes it without question or hesitation.
As they pull into the car park, Adam slips his sunglasses off, tucking a leg of them into the neckline of his shirt. He glances over the swathes of blooming foxgloves with a slight purse of his lips.
"Welcome to Fox Grove," Raine says as he steps out of the car.
Adam follows after, keeping in step but letting Raine lead the way. "Mason would enjoy this setting."
"I'm sure he would," Raine says with a nod. "Though I would warn him not to stop by during the day. It's a pretty popular picnic site; fills up with people with screaming children and a desire to grill."
"Then I'm glad we have come when it can be only us," Adam says, turning to meet Raine’s eyes.
Raine waits for the inevitable correction of the statement, but it never comes. He glances at Adam, but the man doesn't react, he shows neither regret nor embarrassment. He simply looks out at the foxglove and picnic tables with an impassive expression.
"Come with me," Raine says, placing a hand lightly on Adam's arm to catch his attention. He lets it fall just as Adam turns to look down at it. "I want to show you something."
Adam stares down at where Raine had touched him before looking up at him again, something flashing fast and uncertain over his features until it is gone again, like a rabbit running to burrow. "Lead the way," he says.
Raine steps out among the foxglove, past the picnic benches and play areas, and out towards the more wild parts of the clearing. They traipse through a small copse of woods until they reach the cliffside. Raine holds out an arm to make sure Adam doesn't step past him and over the edge, though he's not convinced it's entirely necessary.
Past the edge, they have a perfect view of the sunset as it casts the sky in shades of orange and pink. The last rays play across the lake below, making it shimmer like an opal. Perhaps Raine can have his cake and eat it, too.
Adam sucks in a sharp breath. "It is quite the sight."
"I'm glad you like it." Raine gently lowers himself onto the grass, letting his legs swing over the edge of the cliff. He can hear the admonishment building in Adam’s lungs, but it never comes. "I used to come here all the time when I first got to Wayhaven. When I wanted to be alone and just sit and think for hours."
Adam, surprisingly, joins him the next second. He keeps his legs on the ground, one laying bent before him, the other propped up so he can rest his arm on his knee. He doesn't say anything. He just keeps looking out over the lake.
Raine looks out over the scene before he closes his eyes, breathing the crisp mountain air deep into his lungs. It's only a few seconds, but he can feel Adam's intense gaze. He opens his eyes and looks at the vampire. Adam doesn't glance away.
"Getting an eyeful, are we?" Raine chuckles.
There's a faint twitch at the corner of Adam’s eye, but then he turns back to the view. When he speaks again, his voice is uncharacteristically soft. "There has been so much happening lately." He glances at Raine out of the corner of his eye. "So much happening to you. It's nice to see you…at ease."
"Me?" Raine barks out a laugh. He looks at Adam with a raised eyebrow. "I'm always at ease. Right as rain, remember?"
"You are a proficient liar, Ciaran," Adam says neutrally. Raine can't tell if it's a compliment or a gentle jab. The use of his name rather than his title or surname doesn't help matters. He wasn’t certain Adam had even heard him over the sound of the carnival’s fireworks. It’s nice to be proven wrong. "But I find that difficult to believe considering the things that have occurred."
Maybe it's the sunset and the fact that the dark always makes Raine feel more honest. Maybe it’s the echo of his name on Adam’s tongue rolling around in his head. Maybe it's just that he's tired of keeping up appearances. Without giving it much thought, he finds himself admitting, "It's easier to relax when I'm around you these days." He lets the words hang between them, unsure for a second if they're to be a guillotine or a noose.
Adam works his jaw a moment before something like a wry smile twists his lips. "I find it easier to be at ease in your company, as well."
"Hmm, high praise," Raine muses, casting Adam a sideways glance. "Quite an improvement from - oh, how did you put it? I believe it was 'a starving vampire let loose'? Or was that the improvement from 'an arrogant, petulant child in a leather jacket'?" Raine laughs as Adam grimaces at his impression.
"I wasn’t aware you had overheard those.”
“Oh, I didn’t.” He leans a little closer, offering a wink. “Think the only one I’ve personally heard you call me was a louse and a rakehell.” He leans into Adam, letting their shoulders knock playfully into each other, before he pulls back again. “I rather liked that one, by the way. But I regret to inform you that you have a mole in your midst. Felix likes to keep me updated on what new and creative pejoratives you have for me.”
Adam groans, pinching the bridge of his nose. He looks more long-suffering than annoyed but Raine still feels a pang of guilt.
“Do me a favor and don’t give the kid too much shit for it.” Raine leans back on his arms. It gives him a better view of Adam, but it also makes them a little closer to eye level. “He doesn’t have enough people to talk to as it is.”
“Felix is at least thirty years older than you,” Adam points out, raising an eyebrow.
Raine shrugs, “And I look about fifeen years older than him.” He gestures to himself. He’s intimately aware of the grey hairs that have started showing at his temples over the last few months, the lines near his eyes that don’t fade anymore. It doesn’t particularly bother him. Except when Rebecca’s staring reminds him of how much he’s starting to look like Rook. Or he catches Adam taking note with that morose look he always gets when Raine makes a joke about it. “Besides, you should see him light up every time I call him ‘kid’. Makes him feel like family.”
Adam muses on the thought, that soft smile that’s reserved for when he’s thinking about the others graces his face. Raine smiles lazily in response. “This is a good look on you.”
Adam glances at him, his brows furrowed.
“Fondness,” Raine clarifies. “You only seem to wear it when you’re comfortable - which doesn’t seem to be often."
Adam takes a long, slow breath. "Being at ease in any situation is difficult for me. Doing what we do, and knowing what we know…it's impossible not to have it in the back of one's mind.”
“Then I’m glad I showed you this place.” Raine fishes his packet of cigarettes out of his jacket pocket. He hesitates for a second, then pulls one from the box and lights it. He ignores the frown it earns from Adam. “I used to think of it as my spot,” Raine continues. He takes a long drag of his cigarette, exhaling out the side of his mouth, though he doubts it does much to spare Adam's enhanced senses. "Come out here and watch the stars. Especially since I couldn't access the roof of my apartment block like I could back in London." He gives Adam’s shoulder a gentle nudge. “Now it can be yours, too.”
“Thank you, Ciaran. I…appreciate the gesture.” Adam lets the words settle in the quiet and Raine lets them wash over him like summer rain. He looks out over the view, thankful again for the lower light pollution. His attention is pulled back when Adam says, “Is stargazing a common hobby for you?"
Raine almost drops his cigarette at the question. He turns to Adam, eyes wide, but he struggles to find the right thing to say. It should be such an innocuous question, but it tears at the old wounds in his heart that still haven’t healed. His free hand comes up to fiddle with the locket around his neck and he can feel the grief pulling his features taut.
"Forgive me," Adam says quickly, turning his gaze once more out across the lake. "I did not realize it was a delicate subject." He shifts slightly, but doesn't move further away as Raine expects. "It wasn't my intention to bring you discomfort.”
“Don't apologize,” Raine takes another long drag of his cigarette, studiously ignoring the way his hands shake. “You didn’t know.”
The silence stretches between them, but it is not a comfortable one like it usually is. Raine weighs his options as the air seems to close in around them. He gives a short nod, though it’s more for himself than for Adam, and balances the cigarette between his lips so he can pull the locket over his head. He offers it out to Adam, earning himself a confused look.
“Go on,” he says, keeping his tone soft and even despite how much they want to come out snapping and snarling like rabid dogs. He looks away as Adam takes it, his fingers brushing ever so softly over Raine’s own and the gesture bolsters his courage. “It used to be more, back when he was alive.”
He doesn’t turn to look as he hears Adam click the locket open. Raine doesn’t think he could bear to see what Adam might be thinking, what might be playing across his composed features. Instead, he continues, knowing he’ll let them fall back into the quiet if he doesn’t. “His name was Eoin. He was my brother. Mo réaltín. Space was his passion.” Raine laughs softly, but the sound cracks a little. “He could name every constellation up there and navigate by them. Fuck me, he was a bright kid. He would have done big things some day.”
Adam holds the locket like it’s as precious to himself as it is to Raine. His eyes bore into the photos within, Rook's on one side and Eoin's on the other. His features seem to pinch inward, something grieving and familiar in the set of his jaw. “ Je comprends votre douleur. ” Then he shakes his head, shutting the locket gently, and offers it back to Raine. His fingers trail over Raine’s palm as he draws back. “When did he pass?”
The barking laughter that rips from Raine’s mouth is hollow and bitter and tastes like ash. “That’s the fucking rub, isn’t it?” He grinds his cigarette out on the sole of his boot, nearly burning his fingers in the process. “He’s still alive, so the doctors tell me, sat up in a fucking care home up north. Might as well be dead, for all the good it’s done him.” Raine takes a deep, shuddering breath, but doesn’t manage to catch the tears as they slip traitorously down his cheeks. “He’s been comatose going on twenty years now. He was only thirteen.” He scrubs his palm across his face, but composure eludes him. "I...I was supposed to look after him. Keep him safe when Rebecca wasn't around."
"What happened?" Adam asks, his tone kind, soft. Raine thinks if he refused to answer, Adam would let him.
Raine looks away, "I failed him."
Adam’s hand falls on his shoulder, warm and steady and tightening just enough to be comforting. On impulse, driven by something instinctual and thoughtless, Raine leans his face into the touch, letting his cheek rest on Adam’s knuckles. Adam doesn’t pull back, doesn’t move, Raine’s not convinced he breathes. They stay like that for what feels like hours, awash in the comfort of familiarity as reality shifts around them.
There is no return from this place they have found, Raine realizes, from gazing into the mirror of each other and seeing themselves. It feels like the moment after a misstep. Like the quick breathlessness as balance relinquishes its hold and gravity wraps its hungry fingers around him. Raine can feel it in every beat of his heart. Does Adam feel it, too?
He shouldn’t push it. He knows it’s a bad idea. It’s likely to shatter the delicate truce they’ve left unspoken here, but Raine can’t help it. He’s been put on the back foot and, to maintain some semblance of control, he has to do the same with Adam. He needs to bring them back to the status quo, back to center, because they're skating too close to the edge of the things neither of them are ready to bring to light. So he pulls away, letting Adam’s hand fall from his shoulder, and does what he does best. He breaks the peace. “You were wrong, you know?”
Adam looks at him with raised brows. In the aftershocks of the moment they've just shared, his expression is open and honest as a journal left carelessly out.
"About your weakness,” Raine says. “It’s not the car. It’s how it gives you some freedom to get away from everything. Like this evening.”
Adam turns his gaze to stare back out to the lake and the minutes stretch into hours. Raine waits for the hammer to fall, for Adam to withdraw and lash back. It would be what he deserves after laying a part of the man out bare and vulnerable between them. It's the one thing Adam hates most, and a weakness Raine has exploited with extreme infrequency. But Adam only offers a sigh and the most broken smile Raine has ever seen. "You know me better than I know myself, it would seem."
The admission hits Raine like a blow to the stomach, knocking the wind and words from his lungs. He looks down at his hands. In the wake of being exposed, Adam has offered him an olive branch, in his own way. He doesn't feel he deserves it, but he's so tired of fighting with Adam, and has been for a while if the progression of their conversations of late are anything to go by. In the split second that he decides how to answer, he makes another decision. He takes the offer of peace. "Maybe you and I are just more alike than either of us thought. Maybe we’ve both been through more than any one man should.”
Adam’s eyes flash to his. In the dark, Raine could swear they’re too bright. "And what would you know of what I've been through?"
Raine snorts and rolls his eyes. "I don't know the particulars, no, but you're not so hard to read as you think. You hold your shoulders like a man who's seen too much bloodshed and you worry for your team like a brother for his siblings. And you keep your emotions close to your chest because the world has taught you that you can trust nothing, not even your own heart." Raine shifts his posture and sighs. "And for all my posturing, I understand why you do it."
“It feels absurd for me to be saying this - I’m sure you’ve been doing this much longer than I can fathom,” Raine leans forward, his shoulders hunching, and he flexes his fingers to release some of the excess tension he feels. “But this job, this life…it takes such a heavy toll. I can feel it already. Fuck, Adam, it’s only been a few months, and I can feel it in my bones. It-”
“It weighs you down.” Adam’s lips stretch into a thin line and, for the first time in the entire evening, he looks tired. He looks his many years. “You are right, Ciaran. It is more than one person should have to bear.” The words come out bitter, spat out through grit teeth. He meets Raine’s gaze and there is a grief there so strong, it makes Raine's heart ache. "I would take this burden from you, if I could."
Raine opens his mouth and shuts it again as his words fall short in the face of Adam's tone. He wants to reach out, to pull Adam close, to stop the prickling in his eyes and just let himself cry again because it's all just a bit too much. It was easier when it was just him. He could fake a smile and a laugh and snap out a joke for Tina and Verda and even Rebecca if need be. But Unit Bravo have wormed their way past his walls and now he feels those cracks with such intensity. Adam has stepped through the ruins and seen him. It's a terrible burden. It's an unparalleled relief.
Another cigarette calls out to him, but he squashes the impulse. Picking up the habit again had been a moment of weakness and he doesn't want to slip too far back into it. So instead he rubs his hands across his face and takes a steadying breath. When he finally manages to piece together a coherent sentence, he shakes his head. "I wouldn’t let you." He says at last. "You’ve been carrying this burden too long, already. Why should you take mine, too?" This time, he does reach out. He places a hand firmly on Adam's arm. "But maybe we can find a way to shoulder it together, yeah?"
Adam’s breath hitches. His eyes bore into Raine’s, and Raine recognizes what he’s doing. He’s searching, looking for some proof of concept, taking his measure. He is deciding whether he can trust Raine. "You make it sound so simple," he says at last.
“Oh, I don’t doubt it won’t be a hard lesson for both of us,” Raine grumbles. “Old dogs and new tricks and all that. But I think it will be worth it.”
"Perhaps it will," Adam concedes.
The silence settles between them again, but it is warm like the coming summer winds. So they sit, gazing out upon the lake and the starlight, bathed in the light of the moon. Neither says anything for a while. Eventually, they will have to go back, but not yet. And Raine knows they will both take what they can get, even if it's just a sunset.
Hmm, I could be planning out the new plot and dynamics of my Wayhaven LT rewrite or fixing the lore that needs aggressive rigging and polishing.
Alternatively, I could become obsessed with a song from an indie folk band and subsequently write 10k about my protagonist and the slow crumbling of his relationship with his mother through the deaths in their family
