#note to everyone

[werepire05]

And suddenly, I was okay, for one moment I was finally okay because I finally thought so hard to the point of reaching the good parts of overthinking. I finally figured out what life is for and what I wanted to do with it, but I also thought how early on all of this had been thought up in my head I mean, I'm only still a kid, but I'm also sure. I'm sure of what I need to do and that's okay, honestly it's better that people find out what they care about in life early on, even when your at the age in your life (like me) where you don't know what is possible, when you can't make decisions because they're hard, because you don't know who you are yet! What I'm trying to get at here is, it's okay to be confused, It's okay to not know what comes next.

Love the little things before you find something bigger.

[do-awake-me-pls]

I've noticed that there's not an skating community here on Tumblr... May they be busy skating, or may I haven't found em...? Who knows

[sodamnelectrocute]

In case no one's told you lately, you are loved and you matter.

[likeasongbird]

just say hi just ask how they're doing just say this reminded you of them just say you were thinking about them just say you wanted to chat what's the worst that could happen

[zootndingo]

My brain actually whispered “you do not have enough information to panic about that yet” when another part of me was winding up for a panic attack, and it completely disarmed it.

So I am paying it forward.

[restlessforadventure]

[justgoo0se]

GOOFY BIRTHDAY SHIT

guess who's birthday is coming up

MEEEE

So anyways, gonna talk about how strange they are

like, you celebrate going around in a circle around the sun, and how many times that has happened, usually ads one candle to your cake. But I find it. so strange that its so widely televised that every birthday is just another party. Wouldn't it get tiring of having birthday bashes every birthday??? I like eating cake. mostly. if it s not too sugary, but like come on man. Most of the times what one is going to do is just vibe, eat some cake, hang out with friends to celebrate you're one year closer to death

and also probably trying to ignore how most of your friends may or may not have already started doing drugs. I mean, I get only one life to live and shit but dude??? at least wait until you're on your death bed and have the most WILD FUCKING DEATH BASH OF ALL TIME

maybe thats jsut me tho. Either way, I'm going to maniacally giggle as I set up a birthday discord call and just spam people with quack quack quack and then leave eating some cake. Absolute baller, have you ever just wanted to some crazy ass shit reserved for a party?? Get free food?? Be born!! It's your greatest acheivement, and BOOM!!! when you make it one year- 52 weeks of your life and you're still at least breathing?? celebrate with a shit ton of sugar and staring up at your ceiling on your birthday and wonder how the fuck you're one year older and how did you make it this far

and be proud

Simply something as simple as a birthday should totally be celebrated! Who knows, maybe you've gone through tough shit. Maybe you're battling an addiction that could kill you. Maybe you've tried some things in the past to cut your time short. Maybe you're battling an illness, no matter the kind. Maybe there are days where you just.. don't know if you can go on. Either way, you don't have to celebrate. Don't have to eat cake or be social. It's your birthday. Be proud you made it 52 more weeks.

I know I am. This year has been absolutely BALLING. It's giving 'holy shit, am I just going to stay this way forever, will things be okay, will I ever recover, will I hold on for just a little longer'

Honestly, I've had days where I was just. ready to give up. Not make it so I can yell at the world that I don't give a SHIT and I am going to LIVE. I've had times and episodes where all thats on my mind is move, move. Make it. Breath. Don't give up. Reach out where you can. but in those times, what got me moving was focusing on moving one finger at a time. Stutter my breathing, try to hum. I don't have to yell physically at the world that whatever fucking walls you shove my way I'll break it down.

Because sometimes I'm not strong enough to move through those. Sometimes I have to climb them. Sometimes I just have to wait. To break one brick at a time. It may not be chaotic, violent, or fun, but on the other side there will always be more. More ways to cause chaos, to have fun. To live, move, breath.

Every day, hell, every week may not be your week. It may not be your month. You may be struggling to even drag yourself out of bed or even eat anything. You may not be able to sleep at night but pass out while waiting for a friend to respond to a message. You may want to draw, dance, laugh, sing, write, play, but you're unable to bring yourself to. But what matters is you made it another day. You may be bored as fuck waiting. Just sitting. Doing nothing but wait.

But before you can have patience with anything, you have to have patience with yourself. break shit down. Know that some things may not last. That some friendships are bound to fade. Some days are hell and back. That one day you may die to anything. but you also have to take into account the joy and happiness you have in the present. You have to cherish who you have now, even if you know, even if it nags you that you two may split ways. However you also have to take into account that one day, things will be okay. Sure, they won't be perfect, but it'd be breathable. It'd be just enough. and sometimes, just enough is enough. It doesn't hurt to strive for better, but it hurts to shame what you have now. It hurts to lose sight of the happiness and life you have now. Rushing into things isn't for everyone. But companionship and support go longer ways that slaving away at life so you can live a 'perfect' life. Sometimes people forget to be content with what they have and strive for better.

So, for anyone who also has a birthday coming up, or simply just need to hear it: Happy birthday motherfucker

enjoy your life while you can, you never know when your book ends, but it's better to enjoy it than wait for impending doom.