i just wanted to thank everyone who sent me a supportive note/message/text (LOOKAN AT U GUISE THANKS) after my last two personal posts
it's hard to talk about depression because it's not something that you can really measure or quantify. i don't "look" sick, and it won't show up on any lab test. but it's real, and i work every day to tell it to go fuck itself. sometimes it does get the better of me and i go through really tough periods. the lows are low, but i'm getting better at dealing with them. talked to my doctor yesterday and i'm slowly climbing the hill back up.
it's hard to accept that things are actually good when things have been so bad for so long. i went through a lot of genuinely shitty stuff and sometimes it doesn't seem real that people actually care about me and good things are happening, as stupid or fucked up as that sounds. it's cool that i have some sense of community and real friendship here and i really appreciate that.
HEART EYES, MOTHERFUCKERS.