#nut milk

[drax-the-vampire-king]

Holy shit I actually agree with something homelander said

[victusinveritas]

[gavamont]

There once was a wizard of milk

That used almonds and those of its ilk

To make liquids quite thick

If cow juice made you sick

And his magics made them all white as silk

[fullcravings]

How to Make Cashew Milk (No Straining!)

[hauntedmagic8ball]

I don't think we should call nut water milk. There, I said it.

[arctic-hands]

My milk journey has been

First meal: rice porridge with breast milk

Start dropping weight and can't stay out of the bathroom by age seven, get told to avoid dairy so mom buys Lactaid milk for a year. Whole family despises it and Mac and cheese in particular is now terrible and avoided. I'm still very sick anyway

Be diagnosed with Crohn's at age nine. Resume consuming regular dairy

Twelve-ish: begin to feel a little distress at eating ice cream. Does not stop me from accepting a Dairy Queen cheesequake blizzard reward for single handedly winning a science class quiz game that was supposed to be played in teams but no one wanted me. By sheer force of will and remarkable sphincter control for an IBD patient, mange to wait it out get home that day before having a violent reaction.

Thirteen: throw up violently at school after having cheese sticks for my free lunch. Convince myself it was just the greasiness of the meal that set me off

Fourteen: go into high school conceding the point that I'm lactose intolerant. Unsuccessful at lobbying the head principal to provide lactose free strawberry milk. Start paying more money than a lunch would have even cost if I didn't qualify for free lunch at the snack bar for juice or V8 in order to not go thirsty at lunch. Repeatedly throw up when the only option for lunch other than the very popular spicy chicken every Wednesday that I couldn't tolerate mouth-wise or gut-wise was the same cheesesticks that I had in middle school

Sometime later in high school: discover the Meijer's house brand of lactose free milk actually tastes decent.

Seventeen-ish. Find a hair in the carton of Meijer's lactose free milk and swear off it forever. Try rice milk

(Also an aside at seventeen: develop celiac disease and I thanked my lucky stars that it was polite enough to have waited until I was done with wildly ableist school and too old to trick or treat)

I forget which age but I was a fresh and new adult: discover rice milk ice cream. Desperately pretend it tastes and feels like real ice cream.

Shortly after: try coconut milk. It's tasty, but hardly a neutral milk-like taste and doesn't go well when mixed with other ingredients. Coconut milk ice cream is likewise lackluster

Nineteen? Discover the boxed and shelf stable almond milk. Begin to have hope.

Twenty: find out they started making a cartoned and refrigerated almond milk that tastes brilliant

Twenty three? Realize I have forgotten the taste of dairy milk. Almond milk reigns Supreme

Twenty-six: find out what an environmental menace the non-native aimond trees used in American almond milk is to drought-stricken California. Feel guilty but also feel like there's no real way to avoid drinking almond milk

Twenty-eight: Oat milk explodes in the plant milk scene. I ignore this because there's a high likelihood of cross contamination with wheat in both the field crop and in the processing of oats in the same facilities of wheat. No major and common oat milk brands have any gluten free signage

Twenty nine: Oatly converts its American version to gluten free oats brown in dedicated fields and processing facilities. Try it and it's decent. (CAUTION: some celiacs have a reaction to oats themselves regardless of any cross-contamination. I, however, am not one of them.) Become mostly fully converted to oat milk but still keep ordering almond milk when I get an iced coffee because Dunkin and the anarchist coffee shop/bookstore never label which brand of oat milk they use and you're a millennial and despise phone calls

Thirty: Planet Oats is a bit cheaper so I try it on a lark and like it better. Be bummed that it comes in a smaller carton that Oatly and thus is more expensive in the long run. Start putting oat milk in my oatmeal and have a religious crisis because it seems like a decadent and cardinal sin. Remember I'm an atheist and it's okay to be a lil hedonistic and perverse esp where food is concerned

Nearly thirty-one: realize halfway in making this post that it's entirely boring and pointless and is too long for such an uninteresting subject but goddammit I've sunk the cost and will finish this stupid post.

[robbybirdy]

Baking therapy on a budget Ft. Genshin Characters: Baizou - Almond Milk

Hello, every birdie. I am so glad to be back, writing these posts again. I did do some baking posts over the summer, but for some reason, it just doesn’t feel the same. It feels good to be posting these posts again. 

The character in question for this post is Baizou. (Bye-shoe). The doctor of Liyue and the caretaker of Qiqi. His goal in life is to achieve immortality.  He also has a contract with a very sassy white snake named Changsheng. 

Now on to the recipe: Almond Milk. Every recipe for almond milk is the same, it really doesn’t matter which recipe you go to, they are all basically the same. But I do have a recipe that you can follow down below. 

The flavoring is whatever your preference is. I usually make vanilla almond milk. 

You will want: 

1 Cup of Almonds 

5 Cups filtered water

2 teaspoons of sugar (or 2 whole dates) 

1 teaspoon of vanilla or 2 tbsps cocoa powder or ½ cup berries 

Place your almonds in an air-tight container and cover them with water. Place them in the fridge overnight. 

Drain the almonds. 

Add your almonds and 5 cups of water into a blender. 

Now you can add your flavoring now or later, but I prefer putting the flavoring in at the same time as the almonds. 

I have an Instant Pot Blender that comes with a nut milk function. And for someone who does not have an intelligent blender, it takes more than five minutes. 

Once you have the desired thickness, grab your cheesecloth, a thin dishcloth, or a nut milk bag and squeeze the almond pulp out of the milk. Save them in a different container and place them in the fridge. We will use those in an upcoming recipe.

And now that you have milked your almonds, you are going to place it in a container big enough to fit in the fridge. 

This has become one of my favorite recipes. Honestly, I thought that almond milk would be a lot harder, but it is just soaking them in water, overnight. Then blend them with more water and add the flavorings you need. I hope you liked this recipe. Feel free to check out this recipe and more. Down below. 

I hope that you liked this recipe. I hope you had a good laugh.  Feel free to check it out for yourself. See you in the next post. Thank you.

Recipe: Here

Almonds to Zucchini 

[purplenickel]

hmmm i have a almond milk latte (homemade) but its still really strong tasting (compared to dairy milk) not sure if i will buy almond milk again

ive found i enjoy oatmilk especially vanilla (tastes like lucky charms) but it doesnt go into hot coffee very well and coconut milk is tricky to find. ive only seen soy milk at food lion (local grocery chain) and i dunno if ill like it so i havent tried it also its like $5 for a quart thats pretty pricy

i could make my own out of shredded coconut or other nuts but also expensive and i dont have straining cloth. any ideas ? should i just learn to drink black coffee?