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KADAM FIC: LEARNING TO FLY (20/20)

Title: Learning to Fly Series: A New Direction (was Season Four Remix) Pairing(s), Characters(s): Kadam, Kurt Hummel, Adam Crawford, Burt Hummel, Rachel Berry, Santana Lopez, Carmen Tibideaux, Cassandra July, Artie Abrams, Tina Cohen-Chang, Elliot “Starchild” Gilbert, Dani, Adam’s Apples, Original Characters Rating: PG13 (rating may change) Genre(s): canon divergence. Parts: 20/20 (Completed!)

Summary: As another school year starts at NYADA, Kurt seemed to have it all. The respect of his teachers, a group of wonderful friends and best of all, getting to live with the man that he’d come to love. So of course the universe would throw a few curve balls in his direction.

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six, Part Seven, Part Eight, Part Nine, Part Ten, Part Eleven, Part Twelve, Part Thirteen, Part Fourteen, Part Fifteen, Part Sixteen, Part Seventeen, Part Eighteen, Part Nineteen

On AO3

A/N - Whoo... Cannot believe that this monster is finally finished! This series has been such a labor of love for me, and the level of support I've gotten from my readers has left me humbled and deeply appreciative. You guys have been wonderful in encouraging me to continue writing and bringing my stories out to be ready.

I have more planned for this series, and so many other story ideas that I want to explore. I again want to thank everyone who's read my stories. Every reblog and comment just makes my day. Thank you, everyone.

Kurt sealed the last box closed and sat back on his bare mattress with a satisfied sigh, letting the depleted roll of packing tape fall to the floor. Finally, he thought contentedly. The instant that he’d finished his last exam that morning, he was on the phone with Adam to let him know that he was ready. All he needed was a few hours to get the last of his belongings packed up.

He looked about his dorm room, the bare cinderblock walls looking as sterile as they had when he’d first arrived now that they’d been stripped of his decorations. It felt almost shocking at how easily the room had shed his efforts at personalization, making it very clear that this had been at best a transitory accommodation. While living there it hadn’t been the ordeal he’d feared and he’d enjoyed the convenience, Kurt was glad to be leaving. He missed having his own space.

With the tests done and the spring term officially at an end, many other students boarding in the dorms were also making their preparations to leave and the common area was a hive of activity. There were parents picking up their freshman children, listening to stories about how tough NYADA was and their relief that they’d survived the first year. Upper classmen weren’t quite so effusive, but there were plenty of hugs as they bid friends and classmates goodbye until the fall. There was even a senior or two, taking one long last look at the school that had trained them before they left for the last time.

He spotted Jamie walking into the common area, pulling his suitcases behind him and waved him down.

“Hey, Kurt… So, this is it,” the taller man surmised with a tired sigh.

Kurt nodded understandingly. The last few weeks of school were always the hardest and everyone needed a bit of a break before starting on their summer jobs and projects. Kurt was just thankful that he and Adam would have a few days to settle and regroup before they found their lives uprooted again. It seemed like they were going to be in a constant cycle of racing and pausing for the foreseeable future.

“Heading home for a bit?” Kurt asked, seeing the travel pillow looped through the handle of one of Jamie’s bags.

Jamie nodded. “I definitely owe the folks a visit since we were so busy with the show this spring,” he answered. “And my internship with the community theater starts next week, so I’ll have a few days to relax. Figure that should keep me busy this summer.”

“Yeah, we start rehearsals next week,” Kurt said, running a hand through his hair. Part of him wished that he could have taken a few weeks to just unwind since this past year had left him little time to take stoke of all he’d accomplished, but he didn’t have that luxury. The experience he gained with the Garrison festival was just too valuable to pass up. Not to mention getting the chance to work with Adam and his closest friends.

Jamie offered a consoling smile. “Maybe it’s better to just keep moving,” he theorized. “You don’t lose momentum.”

Kurt chuckled tiredly. “Like we need excuses to burn the candle at both ends,” he answered back. Nobody studied at NYADA if they wanted to take it easy. “Are you dorming again next term?”

Jamie smiled and shook his head. “No. Katya and I decided that it’s time to move things forward,” he stated happily. “Her roommate is moving out over the summer so we’re going to share the apartment.”

“Congratulations!” Kurt pronounced, happy for his friends.

“Well, it’s a little overdue,” Jamie admitted ruefully. “Fortunately, she got fed up with the prima donna she was living with and dropped some suggestions that she might want to find someplace else to live before school starts in the fall.”

“That’s great. I’m really happy for the two of you,” Kurt insisted.

“Thanks. You’re heading over to your new place now?” Jamie asked.

Kurt nodded happily. “Like you said, it’s overdue.”

“Well, good luck this summer,” Jamie wished, reaching out to pull his friend into a hug. He and Kurt patted one another’s back, savoring the contact before they separated for the season. “I’m looking forward to hearing all your war stories.”

Kurt knew that this would be the norm for their lives as they continued to develop and grow in their careers.. Connecting, making friends in their industry, then separating depending on where work took them. It made him want to keep those connections even closer since they could be so tenuous.

The next two years would be difficult ones, as they continued to build towards what they hoped would be fruitful professional careers. Kurt knew that not all their classmates would return in the fall; some falling out because of the increasing pressure to grow and succeed or to take their chances on finding work. As talented as his classmates were, Kurt thought that there were a few who very possibly have progressed as much as they were going to and he wouldn’t be terribly surprised if they didn’t show up in September.

But he had no doubt that Jamie, Katya and Analisa would be there when he returned in the fall. Along with himself and Rachel, they had repeatedly proven themselves, rising to the occasion and showing that they wanted to be better. It probably wasn’t a surprise that the five of them had come together; not just as respected peers, but good friends.

“You too,” Kurt said. “Text me when you start at the theater. I’d love to hear how they do things.”

“I will,” Jamie promised. They’d have plenty of stories to share in the fall. “I’d better get moving if I’m going to catch my plane. I’ll see you in September.”

Kurt hugged his friend again before letting him go to meet his transportation to the airport. Around him there were other partings of friends with many tearful goodbyes and promises to keep in touch over the summer. For all the competition that the school fostered among the student body, it was nice to see that it also helped create real and lasting friendships.

It wasn’t much later that his phone chimed, advising of a text message. Kurt fished his phone out of his pocket and smiled at seeing the message from Adam. Taking up the handle of his suitcase, he walked out the front doors of the school where he saw his boyfriend standing next to a sensible rental car.

“Hi,” Kurt greeted happily, hurrying over and turning his face up for a kiss.

“Hello, sweetheart,” Adam answered, obliging his lover and pulling him in for a lingering embrace. “Do you have a lot of stuff?”

“Just this and a few boxes with my books,” Kurt confirmed. “I’ll start bringing them out.”

“Need help?” Adam asked as he moved to open the trunk.

“No,” Kurt assured him. “It won’t take me long. I’ll be right back.”

It took a few trips to transport all the boxes out of the room, and Kurt knew that it was telling that when he carried the final box out and closed the door behind him that he didn’t look back.

The drive to their apartment took nearly no time at all, Adam pulling in by the hydrant in front of their building so he could quickly drop off Kurt and his things.

“I’m just going to run the car back,” he assured Kurt. “Are you okay to get everything up yourself?”

Kurt mentally appraised the small collection and nodded. “I think so. They’re not too heavy. I’ll be okay.”

Adam smiled and kissed Kurt again. “Give me about half an hour,” he promised. “Wait for me if you need help.”

Once Adam had driven off to return the car, Kurt took on the task of bringing his belongings upstairs, knowing better than to leave his belongings sitting out on the sidewalk. Once they were safely behind a closed front door, he hurried upstairs to unlock their apartment door before carrying the boxes up one at a time.

He shoved the boxes into a corner of their bedroom and had his suitcase open, sorting through his clothes and tossing his laundry into the hamper to take care of later. There was no real rush to deal with his books, but Kurt couldn’t help from smiling that Adam made sure to leave the top two shelves of the bookcase open for him. The bust of Shakespeare sat atop the bookcase where the Bard of Avon had a clear view of the room and seeming to offer Kurt a subtle smile, welcoming him home.

Kurt wandered about the apartment while he waited for Adam’s return, reacquainting himself with all the things that he’d loved about their new residence. Adam had left the air conditioner running, so the apartment was comfortable, and it hadn’t escaped Kurt’s notice that the bed was freshly made up. Opening the fridge revealed a selection of cheese and fruit for them to share when his lover returned, along with a bottle of wine with a label that caused Kurt to raise an eyebrow in surprise. It was a pricier vintage than they usually indulged with and usually only for special occasions. Kurt supposed that this would certainly qualify so he wouldn’t complain about Adam spending so much. His lover had already collected a selection of take out menus from the local restaurants, so they’d have plenty of options if they decided to stay in and… celebrate.

The main living room was just as he’d remembered, with the windows letting in plenty of sunlight through the filtering blinds, brightening the space and drawing one’s eye to the exposed brick wall that was Kurt’s favorite feature. While they still needed to consider getting some kind of dining set, he was pleased to see that what furniture they did already have suited their apartment nicely.

He felt a sudden need to sit down on every piece of furniture, like a cat wanting to make sure that his scent was everywhere to mark his territory. Adam would be highly amused that that little flight of whimsy, but after being apart for so long, Kurt couldn’t deny the need to all but rub himself against the chair he sat in as he waited for Adam to return.

He perked up when he heard a key in the front door lock and smiled brightly when Adam stepped inside, looking a bit rung out from the heat. “Hey,” he greeted from his spot in his chair.

Adam smiled and stalked over to him, leaning down to give him a warm kiss. “Hi, love,” he answered back. “Settling in?”

Kurt shrugged. “I haven’t started tackling the boxes yet,” he admitted, not ashamed of procrastinating a little. “Just wanted to enjoy being here for a moment.”

“Got room for me in there?” Adam asked, nodding towards the chair that Kurt was currently occupying.

Kurt nodded with a smile, getting up so that Adam could sit and settling in his lap. He cuddled in happily as Adam wrapped his arms about him, enjoying the feeling of their first real shared moment in their new home. Not that they hadn’t spent a good amount of time there since Adam returned to New York getting “reacquainted”, Kurt considered with a mischievous smile, but this was different. Kurt wouldn’t be hurrying back to the dorms because of an early morning class or staying for the weekend like an out of town guest. They were both finally home.

“This is nice,” Kurt cooed happily, nestling into his boyfriend’s embrace.

Adam sighed in contentment, glad to have this quiet moment before reality intruded again. They did have to shop for their housewarming party, as all of the Apples still in the city were impatient to celebrate the return of their old leader and offer their best wishes for their new place. And they had a bare week before rehearsals started in Garrison. But for now, this small space in the universe was just for them.

“I was thinking about staying in tonight,” Adam suggested, resting his cheek against Kurt’s hair and taking in the scent of his lover. “I know that we wanted to explore the neighborhood a bit more, but I’d kind of like to just have a quiet evening if that’s okay with you.”

Kurt smiled, nodding. “That’s just what I was thinking,” he answered agreeably. They’d have plenty of time go check out the local places in the coming months. For now, they just wanted to have a little time to themselves, cocooned in their private sanctuary. “Sounds perfect.”

“I’ve got a bottle of one of your favorites in the fridge,” Adam informed him. “I wanted to celebrate tonight.”

“I saw,” Kurt answered with a smile. “Why don’t I crack it open while you get our snacks set up?”

Adam smiled and gave Kurt a quick kiss on the tip of his nose before letting his lover climb off him. He couldn’t resist offering the lovely backside in his face an affectionate pat as he sent Kurt on his way.

They were going to be okay. Kurt was as confident about that truth as he was in the law of gravity. As Adam put together a plate of cheese and fruit for them to enjoy, he got out the corkscrew from their utensil drawer and deftly opening the bottle of Australian white. He carried the bottle along with two of the good wine glasses that Elliot had given as a housewarming gift to the couch where he poured the wine and waited for Adam to join him.

Settled there, Kurt allowed a feeling of warm contentment to wash over them as they nestled together, feeding one another and enjoying gentle kisses between sips of tart wine. He was keenly aware that their lives wouldn’t allow for many moments like this in the coming weeks. Rehearsals would keep him busy while Adam learned about the practicalities of staging a large production. Their lives going forward would be a constant cycle of rehearsals, productions, classes and day jobs. Lulls like this needed to be cherished, because they were all the more precious for their rarity.

There would be plenty of time for them to worry about work and their careers. At that moment, all Kurt wanted to do was savor their time together.

* * *

“I’m not going to take no for an answer, man,” Elliot insisted to Adam, taking a sip of his beer.

“Elliot, Kurt’s starting rehearsals next week,” Adam reminded him. “I wanted him to have some down time before he starts. This past semester was really rough on him.

“And I just got back. We’re still barely settled.”

“I know,” Elliot granted. “But this isn’t like our usual show. It’s our last one before everyone heads home for the summer and I promise, it’s going to be really informal. No crazy costumes or anything. It’s just a chance to give our audience a bit of fun before we take a break and to show our thing.”

Adam sighed, looking about the crowded room for Kurt to come rescue him since he was closer to Elliot, but the younger man was currently occupied with Mei, Tommy and several other of the older Apples. They appeared to be regaling one another about their experiences from the spring musical and the weeks in class that followed. He managed to catch Kurt’s eye and made a pleading face, hoping that Kurt would be the voice of reason. Kurt nodded in understanding and excused himself from their friends before bouncing over to them.

“Hey, did you tell Adam about the show?” Kurt asked Elliot, sinking Adam’s hopes for a quick resolution to Elliot’s request.

Elliot grinned and nodded. “I’m trying to tell him that it’s not going to be as intense as our last ones,” he assured Kurt. “It’s more like a big jam session with our best fans in attendance. You do what you do best, and they eat it up.”

Kurt’s eyes were shining brightly at the prospect of another stage to command and looked to his lover. “It was a lot of fun,” he assured Adam. “It’s like Callbacks, but with a better band. Everyone’s going to be there, and I’ve even convinced some of the Apples to join in.”

Adam sighed reluctantly, knowing that he’d lost this one. It was very hard to tell Kurt no much of the time and it wasn’t worth an argument over something so silly. If he was being totally honest with himself, he missed singing with Kurt the past few months and it wouldn’t hurt to keep his pipes in practice.

“Maybe Niall and Cynthia would enjoy the show,” he suggested, offering Kurt a smile. He knew that he’d lost this one and at least he could be cordial in his defeat. “He’d enjoy watching me make a fool of myself and we did promise them a chance to get together.”

Kurt’s smile widened when he realized that Adam had come around and pressed a quick kiss on him to thank the older man for his agreement. He hurried back to their friends, probably to announce that Adam would be performing causing the Englishman to sigh. He didn’t miss the knowing grin on Elliot’s face.

“Oh, stop looking so smug,” he groused, mildly annoyed that he didn’t have a graceful way to withdraw without disappointing Kurt.

“I promise, you won’t make a fool of yourself,” he assured Adam.

Adam knew that, but that didn’t change the matter of him just not fitting in with that sort of crowd. “I’m not the showman that you and Kurt are,” he admitted. “I’m afraid that I’m going to be something of a wet hen in your group.”

“Bullshit,” Elliot laughed, his blue eyes flashing. “You’ve got your own strengths as a performer and I missed seeing that while you were away.”

Knowing that he’d been beaten, Adam allowed himself to smile courteously. It was hard to hold a grudge with Kurt’s and Elliot’s enthusiasm. “If you say so,” he granted. “So… Kurt was telling me about the job you got lined up…”

Whatever misgivings Adam might have felt about performing in such a venue, he didn’t have very much time to dwell on them. Not with Kurt’s excitement over both the planned evening and starting rehearsals in Garrison. Niall and Cynthia happily accepted the invitation, looking forward to a night out with friends. The four of them spent some time before the show at a tapas bar near the venue. Small plates of tortilla and Iberico ham and glasses of red Rioja shared with good company made him feel much better about the evening.

The show wasn’t scheduled to start until ten, giving the two couples plenty of time to reconnect and discover that they got along beyond reasons of necessity. To be honest, Adam enjoyed making friends with another couple which was a refreshing change from just hanging out with a large group of mostly singles. Perhaps Rachel and her new beau would be nice to socialize with as well.

By the time they arrived at the nightclub hosting the Hellfire Circus, Adam was nicely relaxed from the wine and more enthusiastic about the chance to perform. Then again, how could he be reluctant to perform with his Kurt? As promised, it was a much more low-key event than the Valentine’s Day show and he hoped that he wouldn’t stand out in a negative way.

Thankfully everyone was casually dressed, with even Elliot wearing jeans and an old Queen t-shirt. His sole concession to his usual performance style was a bit of artfully smudged eyeliner that made his already brilliant eyes stand out even more. He was helping Dani and the band set up while Santana watched, offering her usual stream of unhelpful commentary.

“Thank God, there’s a bar,” Niall pronounced.

His wife gave him a nudge that was just shy of being gentle. “Behave,” she reprimanded playfully. “You’d think that we haven’t been drinking wine all night.”

“Wine isn’t drinking,” Niall insisted with more seriousness than was probably warranted, but Adam felt himself nodding in agreement. Kurt rolled his eyes, muttering under his breath about idiot Englishmen.

Elliot gave a whistle and called the performers over to him, signaling that they would be starting shortly. Kurt looked to Cynthia and said, “We’d better get over there. Try to get seats up front if you can. Don’t think that we need to worry about a splash zone tonight.”

She smiled and gave her friend a quick kiss to his cheek. “Break a leg,” she offered before taking her husband’s hand. “Come on, you. If I get you a beer, maybe you’ll stop complaining.”

“And no beer for you,” Kurt warned Adam, taking his arm and pulling him in the opposite direction of the bar. “I need you sober for our set.”

“Darling, would I ever embarrass you?” Adam demanded teasingly, offering his lover a crooked smile to assure him that he wasn’t even mildly offended. He knew that Kurt’s habit of trying to control his environment sometimes had him stepping on toes without meaning to and he knew that the younger man wasn’t trying to insult him. Kurt knew that Adam certainly wasn’t a heavy drinker by any stretch and could count the number of time’s he’d gotten totally pissed since they got together on one hand.

Kurt’s cheeks took on a warm flush of pink when he realized that he might have overstepped. “I’m sorry,” he said sincerely, giving Adam’s hand a gentle squeeze. “You know that I always get stupid when I have performance brain.”

Adam bent down to press a quick kiss to his lips. “It’s okay,” he reassured Kurt. “You’ve already built a relationship with this bunch and I’m stepping onto your turf here. I’ll be following your lead.”

Kurt sighed, looking quite repentant for his gaffe. “I really am sorry,” he insisted. “It feels like we need to relearn one another a little bit.”

Adam nodded, in complete agreement. They would have to learn one another’s ways again after so long and discover the kind of men that they had grown into over the past months. They both had undergone many deep changes and had discovered much about themselves while they were apart. Teaching one another who they were would only make their relationship stronger. It would be like revisiting those heady early days of their romance, when everything felt so exciting and new.

Unquestionably they would end up jostling more than a little bit as they did so. Both of them had developed new habits and boundaries that their partner would need to navigate, and they’d probably be stepping on one another’s toes more than a few times. While that was probably inevitable, Adam had no doubt that they would manage without too much in the way of hurt feelings. They just needed to make sure that they communicated with one another; that when something bothered one of them, they didn’t stay silent and allow hurt feelings to fester. There shouldn’t be anything that they couldn’t handle if they spoke like the mature adult men they were supposed to be.

“Hey,” Adam said, pulling Kurt into his arms. He bent his head to kiss his lover soundly, making it clear that he really wasn’t at all upset. “We’re good. And I can’t wait to see you singing again.”

“You are such a damn pushover,” Kurt groused good naturedly, his mood resolved by the older man’s assurance that his misstep was a minor one.

“Nah… I just have the good sense to know what’s worth raising a stink over,” Adam claimed loftily. “But if you insist on submitting my application for sainthood, I won’t complain too much.”

Kurt gave a huff, nudging Adam playfully with his body.

Elliot waved the last stragglers over to him as the band finished setting up. “Come on guys,” he demanded, his smile absolutely brilliant with the excitement over having the chance to perform again. “Let’s get this show on the road.”

Much like the show that Adam had watched online while he’d been traveling, the show boasted a wide array of talents. The dancers were all phenomenal, easily among the best he’d ever seen while the fire eaters were trying out some new tricks to amaze their audience. The singers ranged in ability from generally good to amazing, each of them giving the audience their best efforts.

Elliot was a remarkable showman and lead the company with a ringmaster’s flair for the dramatic. Besides his own remarkable talent, he had a definite knack for staging a show to its best advantage. Even without the bells and whistles that the group normally employed, the show was engaging and showed a clear ebb and flow as it was building towards a climax. Elliot had organized the show to show off the best qualities of each performer, giving everyone a moment to shine while at the same time keeping the energy coherent and engaging.

To say that it was an enjoyable show would be a definite understatement of the grandest proportions. After performing a gorgeous duet together, Artie and Tina rejoined their friends looking extraordinarily pleased with themselves. “You look like you had a good time,” he complimented with a smile.

Artie looked a bit winded from his performance but looked very happy. “It’s been awhile since I’ve had a chance to sing like that,” he admitted. “We don’t have a lot of opportunities to sing at school unless it’s for a project and I’m out of practice.”

Tina wrapped her arms about her boyfriend’s shoulders from behind and leaned in with a big smile. “You’ve still got it, babe,” she assured him, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

Kurt was seated at his side, his head resting on Adam’s shoulder as they watched the other performers. Whatever misgivings Adam might have had were fading away as he watched several members of the Apples performing a playful rendition of “You’ve Got Another Thing Coming”, giving the classic metal number a peppy, boy-band vibe. Seeing his friends welcomed and having a place to show off their creative spirits outside of their club was gratifying and he was starting to think that Elliot was a really good, smart bloke and that he could really get behind the idea of this cabaret.

It was pretty mindboggling just how talented everyone was, and his Apples fit in perfectly. Santana and Dani did a sultry duet of “Cheek to Cheek” that had just enough sexual heat without going too far, and Santana was proving why she was so popular at her piano club. They finished with a kiss that was sure to set all the straight men up with material for their spank banks but clearly wasn’t done at all with their audience in mind.

“Hey Rachel,” Elliot called out to the young woman, who’d been enjoying the show between heated kisses with her boyfriend. “You’re up.”

She looked up at Elliot, and it took all of Adam’s control not to chuckle aloud at the sight of her pink lipstick smeared over the face of the young man who’s lap she was occupying. She gave Neil another quick kiss before getting up and after a quick makeup check, hurried to take her spot on the stage. Dani took up her guitar to strum out an accompaniment to her song.

“Drinking wine and thinking bliss, is on the other side of this,” she sang, her voice rising sweetly on the guitar notes. She looked to Kurt and offered him a soft smile. “I just need a compass and a willing accomplice. All my doubts that fill my head, cascading up and down again. Up and down and round again, down and up and down again.

“Oh, I’ve had my chances and I’ve taken them all,” she assured the audience with a world-weary wisdom. “Just to end up right back here on the floor. To end up right back here on the floor.

She looked up at her audience with soft eyes and a gentle, bemused smile and she seemed to contemplate the mistakes of her life. “Pennies in a well, a million dollars in the fountain of a hotel. Fortune teller that says maybe you will go to hell. But I’m not scared at all,” Rachel promised. “The cracks in the crystal… the cracks in the crystal ball.”

After months of watching Rachel sing every song as if her life depended on belting every note out at full volume, Adam thought that this was a refreshing change. She had such a lovely tone to her singing, and he felt that she was drawing him into her performance instead of just demanding that he admire what she could do with her voice. It was a far richer, more nuanced presentation than he could remember seeing from her.

Rachel offered her audience a sad smile as she considered the regrets of her life. “Sometimes you think everything is wrapped inside a diamond ring. Love just needs a witness, and a little forgiveness…”

That was certainly true, Adam thought, pulling Kurt close to him. Rachel certainly had plenty to look back upon, people that she had hurt and things that he was sure she wished that she had done differently. To see regret and doubt portrayed so sincerely hinted that Kurt’s friend had undergone a great many changes while he’d been away.

“And a halo of patience and a less sporadic pace and I’m learning to be brave in my beautiful mistakes,” she assured them, her expression one of sadness but determination. “Oh, I’ve felt that fire and I’ve been burned. But I wouldn’t trade the pain for what I’ve learned. I wouldn’t trade the pain for what I’ve learned.”

Adam was glad for her. She seemed to have finally found a place of peace within her. That she was secure enough to know that she could fail and be able to get up again, to know that she could make mistakes and learn from them. And that she would have people around her ready to help when her own strength failed. The misgivings that he’d had about her previous one-sided friendship with Kurt eased because it was clear that she had grown in ways that he wouldn’t have considered possible when he’d first met her.

He was happy not just for Kurt, because he knew how much Kurt’s friendship with Rachel meant. His greatest happiess was for Rachel herself because she seemed to be so much more content.

She shook her head sadly, seeming to look back on her past and her mistakes. “Irony, irony… this hate and love, hate and love. What it does to me, what it’s done to me… what is done… done…”

Dani began to play more strongly, her fingers dancing over her guitar’s strings and Rachel’s voice rose to match it, the two artists playing off one another and building up to the song’s climax. “Pennies in a well, a million dollars in the fountain of a hotel,” she sang, stealing her shoulders with determination. “Broken mirrors and a black cat’s cold stare. Walk under ladders on my way to hell, I’ll meet you there.”

Rachel reined her voice back in, returning to the gentle introspection. “But I’m not scared at all, hmmm…” she assured the audience with a gentle smile. “I’m not scared at all… of the cracks in the crystal, the cracks in the crystal ball…”

Dani played the final notes with a soft flourish and the audience applauded for the young women who’d offered such a gentle but emotionally rich performance. Adam nodded approvingly, giving his respect to the young woman who continued to surprise him so thoroughly. Kurt was grinning brilliantly, applauding for his friend and giving a loud whistle to express his regard. When Rachel stepped off the stage to make way for the dancer set to perform next, Kurt was already on his feet to greet her and pulled her into a warm embrace.

“That was amazing!” he praised effusively, hugging her so tightly that she was lifted off her feet. “Absolutely gorgeous.”

“Really?” she asked, clearly wanting his approval. “I tried to copy a bit of what you do, but I wasn’t sure if it would really carry over.”

He smiled reassuringly, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead. “It was stunning,” he promised.

Elliot came over, resting his hand on Kurt’s shoulder. “You guys are up next,” he advised, keeping an eye on the flow of the show. “The stage lights are set to hit you once Ruthie is done. You’d better get to your marks.”

Kurt nodded, then turned wide, excited eyes to his partner. “You ready?”

Adam smiled confidently. “Born ready, darling.”

The Englishman took his place by the stage, giving the audience little cue that he was set to perform at any time. Kurt was already on stage, hidden in the darkness while he waited for the belly dancer to finish her set. Adam was glad that they set up their performance like this, so he’d have a chance to watch Kurt for a little bit.

Once Ruthie shimmied off the stage in a trail of flowing veils, a spotlight hit Kurt who was sitting on a tall stool. He had one leg crossed over the other and giving the audience an impish smile as the band began to play his music. Adam couldn’t resist tapping his foot to the engaging rhythm and couldn’t help from smiling at seeing Kurt’s shoulder’s shimmy just a bit in time with the music.

“I look up to the little bird, that glides across the sky.” Kurt sang, using that gorgeous upper register of his. He turned his gaze upward, as if watching that imaginary bird in flight. Adam was once again struck by how easily Kurt commanded the attention of his audience, with just a few gloriously sung words.

“He sings the clearest melody. It makes me want to cry,” Kurt trilled, allowing just the slightest bit of grit color his bright notes. “It makes me want to sit right down and cry cry cry…”

He slipped off the stool and strode to the center of the stage, his movements perfectly in time with the music. “I walk along the city streets. So dark with rage and fear,” he sang. “And I… I wish that I could be that bird and fly away from here. I wish I had the wings to fly away from here.

“But my my… I feel so low! My my… where do I go?” he asked, looking to his audience as if they had the answers. “My my… what do I know? My my… we reap what we sow.”

He stood at the front of the stage, legs apart as if bracing himself to the ground. “They always said that you knew best,” he accused, pointing a finger accusingly. “But this little bird’s fallen out of that nest now. I’ve got a feeling that it might have been blessed, so I’ve just got to put these wings to test…”

Adam couldn’t help from nodding in agreement, thinking how apt the lyrics were for Kurt. Whatever boundaries he’d faced all his life, Kurt had long since surpassed them. He didn’t know of anymore more courageous and so willing to put everything on the line for what he wanted. Kurt had always amazed him in his ability to strive towards his goals no matter how steep the odds against him were. He certainly did not need any coaxing before taking wing.

Watching Kurt absolutely command that stage filled Adam with pride. That this remarkable creature was in his life was a gift that he would always treasure. If he could help Kurt reach his potential in any small way, by supporting him and keeping his aspirations in mind while chasing his own dreams, that would be a fine exchange to ensure that Kurt stood by his side.

Kurt moved about the stage with an ease and confidence that normally one would expect in only the most seasoned performer, dancing in time to the music and giving the impression of pride that a young bird might have when discovering his own strength in flight. It was so engrossing that Adam nearly forgot that he had his own cue coming up. If he missed it, Kurt would be so cross with him.

“For I am just a troubled soul,” Kurt advised the audience, his hips gyrating in time with the beat. “Who’s weighted… weighted to the ground.”

“Weighted to the ground,” Adam sang in counterpoint, his warmer tone highlighting the brightness of Kurt’s voice. “Weighted to the ground.”

Kurt smiled at hearing Adam’s voice coming in to support his. “Give me the strength to carry on,” he pleaded, turning his gaze to where his boyfriend was sitting. “Till I can lay this burden down.”

Adam stood, leaning casually up against a post as he watched his lover. “Lay this burden down,” he intoned, giving Kurt a nod of support. “Lay this burden down.”

“Give me the strength to lay this burden down down down, yeah,” Kurt sang, his eyes shining brilliantly, He moved towards Adam, circling about as if showing off how well he could fly to his more mature mate. “Give me the strength to lay it down.”

“Lay it down. Lay it down, yeah!” they sang together, Adam stepping up to join Kurt but not taking away from Kurt’s moment in the spotlight. His time was coming soon enough.

“But my my… I feel so low,” Kurt insisted, wanting Adam’s support so that he could fly on his own but not wanting to be carried. Adam knew that was the last thing that Kurt would ever want. “My my… where do I go? My my… what do I know? My my… we reap what we sow.”

Watching Kurt do what he’d learned he was capable of was both a gift and a privilege and Adam was grateful beyond belief that he had gone to that Winter Showcase performance and had Kurt shoved into his life. Whatever the future might hold for them, Adam knew that they would have the strength to meet it. All of the success in the world wouldn’t mean very much if Kurt wasn’t a part of his world.

“They always said that you knew best,” Kurt accused those who’d tried to hold his back. “But this little bird’s fallen out of that nest now. I’ve got a feeling that it might have been blessed, so I’ve just got to put these wings to test!”

The audience applauded, giving Kurt the respect that he deserved, and Adam had the pleasure of seeing the most telling change in his lover. He couldn’t help from thinking back to that night when he saw Kurt perform for the first time, and how shocked he’d been when the audience of industry luminaries rose to their feet for him. Now he only seemed pleased as he nodded his thanks for their ovation, accepting it as something he deserved. Adam felt his chest swell with pride for Kurt, thrilled to see the confidence that Kurt was now displaying.

The band began to play the music for their second song and Adam let himself slip easily into his role. Stepping forward to stand just behind Kurt, he placed his hands gently on the younger man’s shoulders.

“Into the distance, a ribbon of black. Stretched to the point of no turning back,” he crooned over the softly lifting music. “A flight of fancy on a windswept field. Standing alone, my senses reeled.”

He traced a gentle finger down Kurt’s arm to take his hand. “A fatal attraction is holding me fast,” he sang as he leaned in, seeming to whisper some great secret into the younger man’s ear. “How can I escape this irresistible grasp?”

Kurt turned his gaze up to meet Adam’s, his eyes questioning what his older lover had in mind. Adam just smiled reassuringly, .Kurt’s voice rose up to join Adam’s, using his high range to accent Adam’s warm tenor.

“Can’t keep my eyes from the circling sky,” they sang together, as if alone in the room. “Tongue-tied and twisted. Just an earth-bound misfit, I…”

Adam released Kurt, allowing him to drift away, as if needing to find his own way while Adam watched him from afar. There was the trust that he could render aid if Kurt required it but trusting the younger man to be able to take care of himself.

“Ice is forming on the tips of my wings,” Adam sang, watching as Kurt danced and looked very much like a young bird in flight. “Unheeded warnings. I thought, I thought of everything. No navigator to find my way home. Unladsened, empty, and turned to stone.”

The past months had been so hard for the both of them, being apart and forced to find their own way in the world. Adam had felt cast adrift and lost at times, unable to help Kurt as he struggled with the pressures that were only increasing as he continued to grow.

“A soul in tension that’s learning to fly. Condition grounded but determined to try,” they sang, instinctively knowing how to fit their voices together so that they sounded best. Neither one overpowered the other. Instead, they melded in a harmony that showcased the finest qualities of both. “Can’t keep my eyes from the circling skies. Tongue-tied and twisted, just an earth-bound misfit, I…”

Kurt then moved back towards Adam and they began to move about one another, drifting in lazy circles in time to the music. When they’d been working out their choreography, Adam had noted that it did resemble something of a mating flight and very well suited their choice of material. They had accented that impression with their clothing choices, the shades of tan and grey they both wore resembling a hawk’s plumage as they moved together.

There would come a time when Kurt would have to fly off on his own for a time in order to chase his dreams. Adam knew that well, because Kurt would not be satisfied to just wait for opportunities to come to him. He would fight and run towards any openings that they world might present. Adam had to be strong enough to let Kurt do so, ready to return the support that Kurt had shown him and be confident that Kurt would indeed return to him. They would continue to face challenges as they continued to discover just how much they were capable of.

He reached out to cup Kurt’s face in his hand, gazing at that much-loved visage and knew that he would never try to clip Kurt’s wings now that the younger man was starting to truly discover just how high he could fly. They would take to the air together.

“Above the planet, on a wing and a prayer,” he sang softly, his words as much a promise as a performance. “My grubby halo, a vapour trail in the empty air. Above the clouds I see my shadow fly, out of the corner of my watering eye.

“A dream unthreatened by the morning night, could blow this soul right through the roof of the night.”

Kurt understood what Adam was saying and his eyes were all but glowing with happiness that he had found someone to fly with. He fell into step with Adam, letting the other man guide him through their dance as their voices rose up together.

“There’s no sensation to compare with this. Suspended animation, a state of bliss… Can’t keep my mind from the circling skies. Tongue-tied and twisted. Just an earth-bound misfit, I…”

Kurt nearly laughed when Adam lifted him up above his head with a sudden heave, holding him there as the music swirled around them .The younger man stretched out his arms as if they were wings, tossing his head back as Adam held him aloft, confident that his lover wouldn’t drop him. As the music drew to a gentle conclusion, Kurt was lowered to the ground, finding his place back in Adam’s embrace.

The cheering and applause around them didn’t matter so much. Not when they could gaze into one another’s eyes and see their futures there. Not just of stages to command and roles to play, but of the security of having a nest to return to.

Then stepped off the stage together, Adam keeping one arm about Kurt’s shoulders to keep him close. Elliot smiled and nodded his approval before moving on to make sure that the next acts made it to the stage and Adam was happy to admit that he was enjoying himself. He always did enjoy performing and watching other talented people. He could understand why this group had such an enthusiastic following, as some of the performers wouldn’t have so many venues to show off their skills. That was the very reason he’d founded the Apples; to give people a chance to experiment and perform outside of the normal school sponsored venues.

But it was seeing Kurt’s response to all this that made him glad to have joined in that night. Seeing the way anticipation lit up in the younger man’s eyes and the sheer joy he felt performing alone made overcoming his reservations worthwhile. Adam knew that for Kurt, music was another language that he was naturally fluent in. Whereas singing was something that Adam had always enjoyed and had some decent talent in, Kurt absolutely lived and breathed for it.

After the last act finished, they had the opportunity to socialize and relax with their fans. This was a new experience for Adam; he was very familiar with the gatherings and kind words at the stage door, but he rarely had a chance to really meet and have conversations with an audience about what they thought about a show.

As if to make up for his earlier misstep, Kurt got him a beer from the bar and offered it with a smile and a kiss. “Enjoying yourself?” he asked, remembering Adam’s earlier misgivings and the older man had about participating.

Adam nodded, not reluctant to admit that he’d made the wrong assumption about the cabaret. “It was fun,” he assured Kurt without reservation. “And I’d missed singing with you.”

“Me too,” Kurt admitted. He cocked his head towards the cabaret regulars. “They’re not to scary, are they?”

“Not at all,” Adam agreed. “I’m glad we did this.”

Kurt smiled broadly and leaned up to kiss Adam soundly. “Let’s go find Niall and Cynthia,” he suggested. “I’m curious to see what they thought.”

The venue turned into quite the party as performers and spectators mingled, enjoying this last get together before the cabaret’s summer hiatus. Niall clapped his hand on Adam’s shoulder, offering his friend a warm grin.

“That was bloody fantastic, mate,” he insisted while Cynthia was offering her regards to Kurt.

“Thanks,” Adam said thankfully, sipping at his beer. “It was all Kurt’s idea. I just followed his lead.”

“Nah,” Niall corrected. “You held your own there. Didn’t know you were that much of a singer.”

Adam shrugged. “I’m not. Not the way Kurt is,” he insisted. “But I can hold my own in the right crowd with the right material.”

He caught up Kurt in his arms, pulling the laughing young man to him and pressing a sound kiss to the top of his head. “This one, on the other hand…”

Kurt swatted Adam’s arm. “You’re such a goof,” he complained playfully.

They mingled a bit more with the audience and Adam found that the crowd that had attended was both knowledgeable and appreciative, which was always a pleasure for a performer. He noted a man eyeing Kurt with an air of resignation, but who’d raised his glass to toast his partner. Kurt had seen him and nodded his thanks, seeming to recognize him.

There was probably a little bit of a story there, Adam decided, but not an important one. He’d ask Kurt later, but had a feeling it was something that they’d be able to share a laugh over. After all, if someone didn’t admire his Kurt, then it was obvious that they had no taste. He’d be more offended if Kurt didn’t garner the interest of others.

It was nearly three in the morning by the time they’d returned to their nest, the pair of them happy and laughing as they fell into bed together. Adam pulled the younger man close, burying his face in his hair and felt utterly and completely at peace.

He had no idea what the future might hold for the both of them. There would be triumphs and successes and times when nothing would work in their favor. They would have weeks together and months apart as they worked in a profession that offered nothing in the way of stability.

But together, they would fly.

* * *

Rachel's solo - "Crystal Ball" by P!nk

Kurt's solo - "Little Bird" by Annie Lennox

Adam's solo - "Learning to Fly" by Pink Floyd