#oceansvanidicus

[v1ctimplagued]

continued from here / @oceansvanidicus

　It's easier when he doesn't know the people. There is no risk of attachment. Just another night that will blend into others and be forgotten after some time. Soon, the other male's face would be indistinguishable in a crowd and Billy could go back to pretending, burying these urges and killing that ache that surfaced in him every so often.

It's harder when they're his type. Pretty, gentle-appearing, and making Billy want to melt in them. He's always gotten carried away. It's why he even does this — find strangers so he will not have to see them again, will not have to face any truths he rather keep hidden, and protect the soured heart he kept in his chest locked behind bone and regrets.

"You could have woken me." He would have left. His eyes follow the other male's movements and he sighs, relaxing some in the bed now that the surprise has washed over him. He should be leaving soon. But he doesn't quite want to just yet. "If I was going to make it all the way to your bed I might as well lose my clothes too," Billy mumbles more to himself than others, deducting on the events that are a little fuzzy from the night prior. He should have been kicked out already, clothes tossed afterward, and night promptly behind them.

"Breakfast doesn't sound too bad," He adds after a second. But it's merely an excuse for a second longer.

[managedxmischief]

@oceansvanidicus​ asked : it’s not my fault, it’s 4am and you’re fucking yelling at me! — for Sirius from Draco!

     “Because you’re being stupid!” Sirus said. It was harsh but it was true. “You think you have to act that way you do and follow your family. You don’t. You forget we come from the same family Draco. I made my choice and so did your aunt. We made our own choices. For our friends and the people we loved. Losing your family sucks but watching the people you care about die, losing your self in the process...it’s hurts so much worse trust me, I saw what it did to my brother.” 

[ausdauer]

@oceansvanidicus​ || Dead but not Gone. 

She had seen it all. Every day since the storm that had ruined it all, since Levi had picked up her necklace and placed it in his pocket. She went where he did. Isabel helped when she could, giving Levi little hints that he might have just put down to initiative or fate. But sometimes she would get a quiet thank you at night as he put her necklace on the bedside table. Isabel spent her time repaying Levi back for all the times he had fought for her. 

It was a funny feeling being a ghost, a silent watcher but still able to mess with people if she gets the urge. It was a lonely world though, most of the dead went up to join Farlan for a well deserved rest and she waved them off, doing her best salute.  Sometimes she wondered about how Farlan was, what was up there waiting for her, but there was no way Isabel could go now, not when she felt the freedom she had always dreamt of. She could truly fly now. 

Greeting the dead never got any easier, but she tried her best, letting them know how hard they fought, that the living would not let their deaths mean nothing. She showed them the light, watching as they made their decision. But most of the time they died alone, or with someone they loved, there was no reason for most of them to hang around only to keep watching people die. Isabel didn’t know which way this would be going though, she felt for Levi, the choose he had to make. Erwin or Armin? She placed a hand on Levi’s shoulder as he finally decided, giving the serum to Erwin. But that meant it would be Armin she would be greeting.

Isabel gave him time, time to look at what had happened, to figure it out himself before she walked over, “Armin” she spoke quietly, hands behind her head, “You have probably figured it out but you didn’t survive the heat. I’m sorry” she spoke, looking at the scene beside them. “You have done well, but now you have a choice to make”. 

[sauersten]

"In this world, we’re just beginning to understand the miracle of living.” - @oceansvanidicus

Dull is the most apt description for it: the tedious labor of scanning paper and shoving the words into the mind like they’re meant to mean something. One could assume the reader lacks understanding; that’d only be a half-truth. The material isn’t fully incomprehensible, yet it is  antonymous with interest in the unfocused hazel eyes that “attempt” to study it. How unfortunate that it’s necessary, leading to an arrangement that lacks favor. Tuning out meaningless words with sight and sound up to now, a small few finally manage to sound somewhat entertaining.

Eyes focus now, directing their attention to the source, as if it will help absorb and dissect the statement bit by bit. For once it gives him something to think about: the miracle of living... The idea swirls inside for a moment, an inspection underway to find what about it strikes him. Results point to the nature of the notion as the culprit: it’s paradoxical. 

“I think I’m beginning to understand that you don’t understand. Life isn’t a miracle, not in the slightest.” The response comes in a voice about as dull as the last however many minutes spent poring over useless information. His wrist flicks in a slight wave, as if shooing any counterargument away before it starts. “But hey, maybe you prefer reading fiction. Who am I to judge your interests, huh?”

[ausdauer]

Starter Call || @oceansvanidicus

“Here, have some extra bread” Isabel hummed, walking up to join Armin around the stables. Unfortunately he had lost the competition and was tasked to help her in the stables that evening. By the time they got to the mess hall the bread had gone. Little did he know Isabel had already stolen a couple rolls for them just in case. “Thanks for helpin’ out, if yer lucky I’ll even treat ya t’some hot chocolate once we’ve put all the rugs on” she smiled but placed a finger over her lips to suggest it was a secret. 

“Ain’t always so bad losin’ y’know”. 

[v1ctimplagued]

"Have you ever bothered, for just one minute, to understand how someone else might feel?"

memes. / always accepting.

　It burns and prickles. Those words coated with disapproval and criticism almost as if they came from a gruffer, crueler, less forgiving voice. The tone is what gets him – the words are just an added scorching. ‘Cause was it that damn obvious he’s never put any consideration into anything that didn’t serve him? Even in his rare moments where he doesn’t just react and puts a little thought into it he’s only doing so because it benefits him. His shoulders square and his jaw tightened, eyes electric and ready to meet any opposition. Even if it was just someone staring the fuckin’ truth about him: he was a piece of shit.

“Sorry to break it to you,” he says already gearing himself up for a fight when it doesn’t have to be, “I don’t give a fuck. Not about how you feel, not about how anyone feels.” The cold rage from knowing empathy just served those who wanted to be hurt, be disappointed, to be let down— and Billy? He’s so far from the child who would cry when others got hurt. “The world seldom offers the same naive consideration. So it can all burn for all I care. I thought being basically a damn genius you’d know the answer to your own bullshit question.”

[godstrayed]

❛ you're the last person i wanted to see, actually. ❜ — for either Will or Hyunsu! (you’re the first person I’ve seen with a Sweet Home muse which is WILD bc that show is so good)

memes. / always accepting.

　It was not like he was anyone noteworthy or exceptional in any regard. He was far from the grandiose image his family would have liked for him to become, battle-gloried and honorable. In fact, Hyunsu would have much preferred to not exist at all, dying with his shame and disappointed painted on his tomb as a reminder. However, it was extraordinarily hard to kill a titan - much less his, the winged titan. After a while, he let those thoughts die with time. He might not value his own existence but there were people who needed him even if it were only for him to be shield, a sword, a sharpened blade in which they fought through.

Humanity was fragile. So terribly fragile it seemed like a mockery for Hyunsu to be in the position he was in when he hadn't ever wanted it. He saw how people feared them, how others envied them, but how there was a divide no matter what the sentiments were. They were the best tool for humanity's survival and it seemed if nothing else, everyone accepted that. "It wasn't like I wanted to come. I didn't have a choice."

[micsmasmuses]

@oceansvanidicus liked for a starter.

Brows furrow as he looks down. He didn’t even realize Armin was there honestly till he tugged at his shirt. Hes too quiet sometimes.

“Hey Armin… I didn’t even notice you.”