#officialwizardnews

[officialwizardnews]

the horrors persist but so do I

[officialwizardnews]

hello we at official wizard news are now proudly sponsored by (checks notes) the brand new .45 kitchen gun great at removing stains, limescale, sinners and so much more get you new .45 kitchen gun now

[officialwizardnews]

hey has any one seen a animated scroll of create meth giraffe asking for a friend of course

[officialwizardnews]

why is there a god damn anime girl by my youtube logo its not on any other youtube tab i have open and its not on the google "to day is" banner so i dont know what the fuck there doing up there

[officialwizardnews]

*somehow got a fireproof suit and shoes on* first time interviewed on TV, this is gonna be stressful....

[opens front door to find a strange dog warring a suit and shoes]

sure I'll will put that on the news

tech dwarf get the camera and microphones we are doing an improvised interview

[officialwizardnews]

The wizards of today are so lazy they are all ways buying or stealing deep accursed knowledge it is even worse when they expect it to just randomly show up in any old ruins back in my time line we had to research are dark evil magic by committing horrendous crimes against the fabric of time and space itself it was hard work

yes my original home time line may have been erased from the multiverse but that does not mean you should take the easy way

lazy bones!

[officialwizardnews]

hello I would like to announce that i am temporary changing from lawful neutral to lawful evil as a side effect of not doing my normal news job from... the curse... and i have taken up some work as a "wizard tax them" luckly my pay grade is too low for me to give a shit and I will not be going through gigerleths ward field of fist to charge them 38 gold on crab tax despite how much they want me too

[officialwizardnews]

hey i live on the same sub island as "the frog" and I am hearing some weird noises at night should I give it something or should I ignore this?