This is a birthday present for my friend ohhossanight :) It is a fanfiction of history that takes place about two years ago. It stars her. This is actually based off of an inside joke between Liz, myself and her mother, but anyone who is at all familiar with Liz or her interests should find it mildly entertaining. Happy birthday, Liz--enjoy!
Beep. Beep. Beep. BEEP—an Amazonian hand slammed down on the now-blaring alarm clock to halt its incessant beeping. Not long after Liz could curse the fact that the waking state existed, she heard a small vibration from her cellular device. Sitting up in her bed, short hair wild and messy, she made one of her most frequent Liz faces and grabbed her phone. Opening it, she didn't know whether or not to be annoyed or mildly interested in the sender of the text message,
Hey, Liz! I'm not going to prom today, but I know you are—I hope you have a good time! :D Your mom and I did you a favor—it should be here soon! -Alex (who IS lesser than you)
It's going to be here soon? thought the high school senior. What the FUCK does that mean? No more than two seconds later, there was a ring on the doorbell—Liz's mother whipped open the door, a sunny, mischievous grin on her face as she announced that there was a visitor just for her daughter. Deciding it was an appropriate moment for another Liz face, the teen rose from her bed in a glorious fashion and traveled downstairs, her Liz face still very much present when she opened the door to the mysterious visitor.
She almost asphyxiated the second she saw his face.
“Hello, Elizabeth? I got a letter from your friend and mother telling me you needed a date to your school's prom. I can't just let down my biggest fan.”
It was Hossa. THE Marian Hossa. Before she knew what she was doing, Liz started flailing and ran upstairs, tears pouring from her eyes. She busted into her room and threw herself on the bed, burying her head in her pillow in mortification. From downstairs, she could hear her mother talking to Hossa.
“I'm sorry, my daughter's just very shy...you really are her favorite. She's star-struck!” Liz's entire bed was now drenched with her tears.
“Liz!” called her mother. “Hossa is waiting—don't make it so he had to come all this way for nothing!” Liz stood from her bed reluctantly, recognizing the truth in her mother's words. She shuffled downstairs, still embarrassed as all hell and unable to look the hockey player in the face directly.
“Don't be embarrassed, Liz,” said Hossa with a smile. “This will be very fun, I'm sure; we even got Toews to drive.” Liz felt a fangirl face coming on, but ignored it.
“Should I get my dress now?” she asked, finally gaining the courage to speak. Hossa put up his hand.
“We have arranged for that as well—we have for you a custom-made dress with the Blackhawks logo on it. It's made out of jersey material, too.” This had to be a dream. Liz was half expecting that she was being seriously punked. “Close your eyes when we go outside,” said Hossa. “There is yet another surprise waiting.”
The two walked outside with Liz still in disbelief. “Open,” said Hossa. She did; a zamboni greeted her eyes. Toews sat in the driver's seat, waving.
“Hi, Liz!” he called out happily. “Thanks for the support! We're really happy to do this for you!” Liz cocked an awkward grin, waving back stiffly. Thisisnotrealthisisnotrealthisisnotrealthisisnotreal she thought over and over. She and Hossa climbed the ladder leaning against the vehicle and sat on top. Toews fired up the engine and the zamboni motored down the road towards the high school.
“It's 8:00 A.M.” said Liz. It was still difficult for her to talk in front of them. “Why are we leaving already? Prom doesn't start for hours.”
“We are redecorating the hotel that hosts your school's prom,” answered Hossa. “It's going to be Blackhawks themed—perfectly suited to your tastes!”
Liz thought about the fact that this would ruin prom for the other kids; then, she remembered that all of the kids she went to school with were assholes. This was awesome!
They arrived at the hotel and set to work. A Blackhawk head as a disco ball, red wallpaper, and an ice floor...everyone had to wear skates to dance. These accomplishments, of course, required “taking care” of the guards. All it took were a couple of Hossa's sticks...similar to Liz, the employees who were given the mementos hyperventilated upon reception, which caused them to pass out. Problem solved.
“I got food, too,” said Hossa. “The best kind.” Promptly, two men brought in a kitkat bouquet and set it onto the dining table. Following them was a man with a covered roast as a main dish. Liz was past caring if this was a dream or not—it was amazing either way.
She had the most epic prom dress in the world. Hossa was her date. Toews drove her to prom on a zamboni. And she got to piss off a bunch of people while all this was happening.
