#ons.

[hevcrap]

There was a tree down in the middle of a trail and some 40something white soccer mom looked vaguely irritated about it and opened her mouth and started gesturing at it like she was going to complain to me but I guess I looked haggard enough with nitrile gloves on dragging around my deceased animal removal shovel over the rocks like Pyramid Head Silenthill (I had to crawl on my hands and knees for 50 feet with a million Huge spiders on all sides to try and drag a raccoon out of the back of the cave it decided to die in and failed miserably because that shit disintegrated into bones fur and maggots instantly upon shovel contact) that she took one look at my dead fish eyes decided to not say anything and just turn back around. Customer service win.

Also who the fuck cares about either "problem." You're outside in nature at a government managed park. Things crawl in holes to die and trees fall over. Don't touch it and walk around it. Problems solved.

[textsfromgayvampires]

[i-willraisehell]

I don't think we're in Kansas anymore ...

-His escape is less than graceful and, in his push through Earth's thick atmosphere, his battered condition takes on an additional, unfortunate twist. At first he believes the sickening sensation somewhere in the depths of his tank are being caused by some odd displacement of the drone he carried inside him, but when he hits space-

::What the ...::

-It becomes evidently clear that the cause of his distress are the accumulated wounds from battle. While normally immune to the vacuum of space as a result of his insulation, nothing was protecting the open lacerations and cracks currently streaking his back. He panics in that moment; this was something that simply didn't happen to a shuttle-! It would be a bad idea to return to Earth in his condition right now; some same wounds would cause complications upon re-entry. However, he didn't have much a choice in the matter, not if he wanted to avoid bleeding out within the next few clicks. Decision made he turns back, and dives, hoping for the best-

...

-Everything that follows is blank; the stasis-locked flier he has survived re-entry thanks to his fall being cushioned by masses of snow that dwarf even him, though ... unbeknownst to him, his descent has taken him into an alternate Earth than the one he'd just rocketed into. The irony of his situation is lost on his blacked-out processor, and little does he know what awaits him, for when he finally awakes from his slumber.