#oops long post

[veilofthorns]

[thecourtfinchster]

there are less than two weeks until somewhere beyond the sea!!!!!!!!!!

today I am thinking about the implications of Linus learning how to knit. thinking about the joy Arthur would have after receiving a very lumpy pair of colorful socks as a gift (such a touching notion compared to Charles thinking Arthur's socks are stupid/too silly). thinking about a bashful Linus gushing over the imperfections, but that first pair becoming Arthur's favorite.

Linus knitting sweaters and vests for the children, getting better and better at patterns and sizing as their collections grow. special sweaters for christmas or birthdays!! a parade of pomeranians for Sal. yellow flowers for Phee. root vegetables for Thalia. etc. Theodore stealing stitch markers and adding them to his hoard, along with miscellaneous yarn scraps.

Arthur getting Linus a beautiful array of knitting needles, including ergonomic grips when Linus' hands start cramping. Zoe whittling a set of wooden needles as a gift. maybe eventually Linus picks up crochet as well.

thinking about Linus slowly becoming comfortable with knitting clothes for himself, and feeling good in them. that man belongs in an adorable homemade sweater vest, covered in symbols corresponding with each member of his family. it just feels so right that he should pick up knitting, he's such a perfect character for it.

[earhartsease]

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee we're getting our new wheelchair this afternoon! thanks to brexit it's taken 3 and a half months since ordering it (all the bits are coming from Germany to the UK)

pics to follow of course, expect green and gold

anyway this is only our second wheelchair, and it's a better fit for us than the first, has a much more supportive backrest

but the main change is our current chair has power assisted wheels that you still push to move, and thanks to a combo of eds (increasingly slippy ribs and shoulders), poland syndrome (born with some missing muscles), and ME, we just can't do that self-propelling any more even with the assist

so the new chair has similar powered wheels, but they do all the work and we drive with a joystick - we had to get a whole new wheelchair because the new powered wheels didn't fit our current model, but we're ending up with a wheelchair better fitted to our body so it's been worth the palaver of getting it all

we're incredibly grateful to all the people who donated to our fundraiser, and to three charities that between them paid for just over half the cost of all this (the entire setup cost around £8,400) - we couldn't just buy an off the peg power chair, because they simply don't make them for really tall people unless you get a custom one for twice the cost of this one

and we're still processing our internalised ableism over this switch from self-propelling to power chair - because the general public seems to treat those very differently and it's a shitshow tbh - we're sad to not be able to push ourselves any more (like we "should" be able to - that's the kind of thinking that had us waiting a year longer than we could have to get a wheelchair instead of struggling with crutches), but also incredibly happy that we'll be so much more mobile! well be able to show up for stuff not tired and in pain just from getting there, and that's magic tbh

anyway, this is partly to thank everyone on here who contributed, and also to encourage you to look at what your attitudes are to power chair users compared to self-propelling wheelchair users, because some people out there are very weird about it - and also to encourage you to get a wheelchair if you're really struggling with other mobility aids and this would help - and also to let people out there realise that a wheelchair that's properly fitted to your body is not cheap, so please do help others with their fundraisers if you can

also we want to explain that our current wheelchair is called Saoirse (sound like sore-shah, irish for "freedom"), and the new chair will be still be Saoirse because it's like the Trill from star trek, the consciousness will transfer to the new chair (via the seat cushion) :)

happy rolling, all of us! ☀️🌿

[petal-boi]

heres a masterpost of inscryption cards I've made so far including the new ones i haven't posted, from now on I'll probably reblog this post with new cards

heres the process.

color cards with boiled down coffee and turmeric, iron them flat cuz they like to warp, do outlines name and stats then sketch out then ink, i grid both my physical card and the reference to better make sure proportions are correct.

also bones, the in-game version is hard to sculpt every time, but making little bone shapes is fun. im not amazing a painting lol

[redyarns]

who’s your favorite character to write in undertow?

oooo good question. definitely a juggle between sentinel and megatron. sentinel because his struggle is masked externally by the glory and comfort/ease of being an aristocrat as well as the future prime. his insecurities and fears are so potent that it leaves him incredibly weak to manipulation (as weve seen), which contradicts with his outward appearance of being very strong and leader-like. aka hes a character who i love to whump on for some reason. its strange but by this point i kind of consider him a different character from canon sentinel, tho that makes sense i suppose. canon sentinel is gross and i want to shred him into paper, but undertow sentinel i want to knit a scarf for

megatron is just really fun because so far hes the most mysterious character. weve gotten little bits and pieces of who he is, his backstory, and who he once was, but not all of it. ive been purposefully trying to limit his pov as much as possible (which u will recognize if u compare his pov to others. he deliberately does not think of his past much and in situations where he feels he cant be himself [like with moonracer and smokescreen] then he'll kind of "fade away" and the scene entirely focuses on other characters. isnt it neat?) to preserve that feeling. its funny because initially he was meant to be super sexy and cold and cruel, and maybe at times he is, but hes also still a complete goofball which i adore

all the characters (aside from magnus) are meant to be somewhere in their early 20s, and i really wanted to convey that young adult vibe. so they have the maturity to face real world challenges and feelings, but theyre also completely inappropriate at times, and have a sense of humor u can relate to. orion especially has a pretty interesting inner monologue, since he tends to think of funny stuff at serious moments or he curses a lot lol

i would say the most difficult character to write is bee. i adore him but hes the one ive written the least so its hard to stabilize him into a character i can write consistently. im still figuring it out so hopefully ill be more confident with him soon! the next scene is in his pov and im worried i wont be able to pull it off. fingers crossed

[spacefoxy-irl]

I hate being THAT guy, but I kinda agree on your thoughts about Ace. Don't get me wrong, he was great in the band. He was an OG and he had talent, but goddamn there were so many things about him that rubbed me the wrong way. And it IS hard to be super critical because of all the Ace simps, but truthfully, I never was one. He was never as great as he hyped himself up to be. Tommy surpassed him YEARS ago. He just refuses to accept it.

Spice ahead.

These are always super difficult things to talk about. I avoid speaking my mind because like I said, I don't want to upset anyone. That's not my intention here. And let me get this straight, I'm not villanizing anyone for liking Ace. I don't believe for one second that anyone likes him for the bad stuff he's done and said. So yeah, I'm not saying anyone who likes him is a bad person or they should stop liking him.

But back to my point - yeah super difficult stuff and I don't want to start any fandom discourse here. But I kinda boiled over. Because I rarely do that, I seem to have gained some kind of reputation as someone who blindly adores people and there are some people who for whatever reason believe I'm an Ace defender (again I'm very confused where that came from since I don't even talk about the guy, like ever) or that I defend the dumb shit he's done (that n*zi dressup ask I got ages ago, again very confused because I have never even touched on that). People have gotten a very skewed image of me as a fan, it seems. I do have opinions. I usually keep them to myself because like I said, I don't want to anger or hurt anyone who likes these people.

I'm reaching the end of my tether with Ace though. Tommy does not deserve the shit he's getting and him trying to pull Eric Singer into this is super scummy. Those two kept Kiss afloat for the past 2 decades and while Ace checked out both times he was in the band. For heaven's sakes, he checked out on his own solo band too to the point Todd had to make most of the music and he just showed up to play on it. And lets not even begin with him doing drugs with his own daughter.

Ok I'm getting a bit too deep into it now. I guess this is mask off - whoops, Jen's not just blindly adoring people and not acknowledging the problematic shit. But yeah, I'm tired of him having to lift himself up by dunking on Tommy who has never done anything to him. I can't stand it.

I'll end this with something positive, so this is not gonna be just a huge post of me foaming at the mouth. Ace is an excellent guitarist. If anyone wants to look up to him in any way, let it be his skill in playing.

[toburnup]

Just wanting to pick your brain( bc I'm kind of like this too) what is it about Steve? He's the common denominator in all the ships you write (Which you do so beautifully btw) like steddie, stommy, and now stonathan (!!!!!). And you've also said it's easier for you to write in Steve's POV than Eddie's. Is there a particular reason? Do you relate to him in canon or your writing?

You are such a genius, I could listen to you talk about your writing all day.

I cannot wait for whatevers coming down the pike: the wip stonathan fic, the iylo update (see what I did there?) . Everything you put out into the world is a gift anyway so <3

!! thank you! hah, why steve? i'm not sure! i was a steve hater for a long time. still am, in a lot of ways.

in canon, i like steve best as a side character. his character motivations shift so drastically between seasons that i find the more screentime he gets, the less sense he makes lmao (probably why i disliked the scoops storyline, tho i love s3 robin).

and honestly, i think i like writing steve as much as i do because i want to read him a certain way, and it's not a version i see enough (for my taste). i really like steve as someone with grey moral values, a bit selfish, rude as a default. not necessarily stupid but he doesn't care if he's wrong. competitive to a ridiculous degree. distracted by trying to figure out who he is but also caring too much about what other people think to really find an answer.

i relate to him (the way i write him) in a few ways, but it's hard for me to pinpoint the exact reasons why tbh. some people who know me well can read my writing and see when i'm projecting onto him.

the big thing for me is i like writing him falling for different people. i love his friendship with tommy and carol, and all the potential romantic overlap. him and eddie are fun (and i love eddie, but steddie isn't my ~OTP~ or anything). jonathan is a PAIN to write but i'm liking it so far. and i know some people will give me grief for it, but i'm also writing a metalsandwich fic (so steve, billy, and eddie) which has been super fun.

i find the s2 confrontation between billy & steve at the byers house to be one of steve's best scenes ("were you dropped too much as a child, or what?... she's not here") - lying to billy's face feels like a fucking wild choice and i love it. steve with anger simmering beneath the surface. finally learning to plant his feet. still gets beaten to a pulp <3

he's an idiot boy and i love him.

did this answer the question? maybe! i can also talk about steve forever, so i love getting messages like this :) :) thank you for reading my works.

[pikahlua]

there's something i can't put my finger on about the scene where kid katsuki finds out that izuku doesnt have a quirk (i believe its a flashback when they fight all might) and it bothers me every time i think about it. its like the point where he really starts believing his own hype and breaking away from thinking anyone else is on his level. i think specifically because izuku isn't on that level anymore? someone he actually thought could rival him as a kid? maybe? the dialogue is pretty in your face but i always feel like theres a subtext im not grasping. of course theres a BUNCH of other emotions on top of it because kacchans havin a little freak out but that whole ep in particular does make me wonder how much katsuki actually acknowledged izuku before their quirks were a thing

Assuming I'm understanding correctly, you’re looking at the flashback from Deku vs Kacchan (S01E07).

And you’re not wrong: Katsuki singles Izuku out even before his Explosion quirk develops.

((Side note: The two characters I relate to the most in the entire series are Izuku and Katsuki as four-year-olds. It’s almost unnerving to me, actually. I had so many similar childhood experiences (well, I imagine many people did, there’s so much that’s universal in that bit of the story), and honestly this is the first dynamic that got me invested in the story.))

My opinions about this flashback have changed over time, even undergoing a drastic change...just now while watching it again, lol.

You see, for reference, I am of the opinion that Katsuki has a unique, meaningful perspective about the world, and he knows it. I’m not talking about his obsession with power or victory, nor am I talking about his arrogance or superiority and inferiority complexes.

I think Katsuki has opinions about the world, recognizes they are different from those of most people, and realizes that society’s views are very often superficial and meaningless in comparison. And I’m not just talking about his treatment of Ochako and rejection of first place at the sports festival.

I see it as early as episode 1 when everyone except Katsuki laughs at Izuku for wanting to apply to the UA hero course even though he’s quirkless.

I see it in episode 2 when Katsuki ignores the praise from pro heroes to focus on Izuku, whom the pro heroes are simultaneously scolding.

Katsuki has always seen something in Izuku that the rest of the world misses. He takes Izuku very seriously, even when society around him tells him that he shouldn’t. Katsuki doesn’t seem to always know what to think or how to feel about it, but he can’t stop noticing whatever this thing is about Izuku that demands his attention.

It’s his heart, in case you don’t know. Katsuki is in awe of Izuku’s heart, whether or not he realizes it.

Anyways, let’s take a look at their childhood.

For a long time, whenever I watched these flashbacks, it seemed to me that Katsuki compares himself to Izuku constantly. He only does this with Izuku, not with any of their other friends. I couldn’t think of why he singles out Izuku like this other than how maybe he subconsciously picks up on how special Izuku is, even before Izuku turns out to be quirkless. In other words, Katsuki sees Izuku’s heroic heart from the get-go.

But now I don’t think that anymore.

We get three moments from their childhood before Katsuki’s quirk manifests.

Soccer scene:

Katsuki impresses Izuku with his soccer juggling

Katsuki claims juggling is easy

Izuku fails when he tries to juggle

Katsuki wonders at how badly Izuku does

Nickname scene:

Katsuki impresses Izuku and the neighborhood kids with his reading skills

Katsuki comments on how none of the others can even read kanji

Katsuki explains that “Deku” means a person who can’t do anything

Izuku is embarrassed

Katsuki wonders why Izuku doesn’t know how to read as well

Skipping rocks scene:

Katsuki impresses Izuku and the neighborhood kids with his rock-skipping skills

Katsuki wants to know how many times Izuku’s rock skipped

Izuku is embarrassed his rock didn’t skip at all

Katsuki wonders why Izuku can’t skip rocks

What strikes me about each of these scenes is Katsuki’s earnestness. Sure, he comes across as cocky and a bit of a show-off, but at the same time, he’s not setting Izuku up for failure. He doesn’t understand why Izuku just can’t get it when whatever they’re doing comes so easily to Katsuki himself. It doesn’t make sense to him.

In other words, Katsuki thinks of Izuku as his equal.

But here’s the thing: For each of those ending moments I bolded, Katsuki sounds genuinely confused. In the soccer scene, he laughs with disbelief, like, “Oh wow, you actually can’t do this, can you?” In the nickname scene, he thinks he’s showing off that he knows multiple readings of Izuku’s name, but it turns out no one else can read Izuku’s name at all. Yet his “You can’t?” line to the neighborhood kids does sound condescending, while his “Why don’t you know?” thought, directed at Izuku, is soft and sincere, like, “Huh, why don’t you know your own name?” He sounds just as confused in the rock-skipping scene except maybe also a little exasperated, like, “I don’t get it. Why can’t you do it?”

And here’s the other thing: Katsuki always goes first.

He’s not at all invested in the other kids. Katsuki is showing off to Izuku. He demonstrates soccer juggling for Izuku. He reads the kanji in Izuku’s name for Izuku. He skips the rocks on the water with Izuku as if it’s the first time both of them have ever tried.

It’s like Katsuki is trying to teach Izuku, and each time Izuku fails to get it, Katsuki also fails as a teacher.

It’s not Katsuki’s fault that Izuku doesn’t get it, of course. Children don’t exactly have degrees in pedagogy. Katsuki would have to understand how Izuku’s mind works, how he learns, to properly teach him. And Katsuki hasn’t developed that level of empathy yet. It’s not exactly a subject in school that he gets graded on either, so he doesn’t even know it’s a skill he’s lacking.

So instead of coming to the conclusion that Katsuki is bad at teaching Izuku, he reevaluates his previous assumption: perhaps they aren’t equals after all.

He comes to this conclusion when his quirk manifests:

And it’s not surprising he’d come to this conclusion in this way. He now sees a clear biological difference between him and everyone else that explains why he’s so good at everything.

And if Katsuki’s amazing, then it’s not his fault Izuku is so bad at everything. Everyone’s just not as good as he is. That means, even if Izuku gets the strongest quirk in the world, Katsuki can still be stronger.

But then, Katsuki’s new worldview gets worse. It gets compounded by Izuku’s quirklessness:

Now there’s a clear biological difference between Izuku and everyone else, and from Katsuki’s perspective that difference is in the opposite direction. Katsuki is good at everything, so when he gets a good quirk, he concludes he’s better than everyone. His quirk’s manifestation just makes that “fact” clear. Izuku is bad at everything, so when he gets no quirk, Katsuki comes to think Izuku is worse than everyone.

It’s a bit of a chicken-and-egg paradox, since he has to be told his quirk was amazing by his teachers and hear from his peers that it’s lame to be quirkless before he makes these connections. Would he have thought quirklessness was actually that bad had it not been introduced to his life via Izuku? I actually do wonder about that, because these things all seem very precariously tied together in his head. But ultimately, I don’t think Katsuki’s problems with Izuku stem from Izuku’s quirklessness; I think the quirklessness filled in the missing piece in Katsuki’s poorly-constructed house of cards.

And then it all comes tumbling down.

You know, I think we all just kind of assumed for the longest time that this scene is about Katsuki realizing Izuku has a caring heart, something a hero needs, something that Katsuki lacks, and that makes him self-conscious. But, when I think about it...

Izuku’s kind of overreacting, isn’t he?

Katsuki isn’t hurt. He smiles and laughs after the fall. He’s barely even embarrassed about it (a far cry from how he might have reacted at an older age). Maybe Izuku is justified in coming down into the ravine to offer a friendly hand, but this is a bit of a dramatic reaction:

He asks if Katsuki is okay, if he can stand, after Katsuki has already told everyone he’s okay. Katsuki’s reaction is to frown like, uh, yeah dude, I already said I’m okay. Then Izuku says:

And that’s probably the most appropriate thing Izuku says about the situation.

Unfortunately, it gives Katsuki context for the strange expression on Izuku’s face.

So there are two things happening here.

1. Izuku is frowning. He looks worried. It’s early in the story so we haven’t had much commentary on this from the narrative yet, but that’s bad. That’s poor form. When you rescue a victim, you have to smile, look strong, give reassurance. Izuku’s not that great at rescue...or that’s what I would have said if he wasn’t four-years-old. And maybe Katsuki even recognizes that. Maybe Katsuki looks at Izuku’s rescue attempt and thinks, meh, 3/10.

2. It’s still better than anything Katsuki’s done in the rescue department.

When Izuku fell over while they were playing soccer, Katsuki didn’t offer to help him up. He’s only ever teased Izuku, postured around him, competed with him. And that means Katsuki has never demonstrated an example of rescue to Izuku ever. And yet rescuing people seems to come naturally to Izuku.

Meaning Katsuki was wrong: there’s something Izuku actually can do.

Oh, and it gets even worse! Katsuki never demonstrated a rescue to Izuku, but he did try to teach him! He tried to teach him a lot of things! And Izuku never caught on. You could construe those “lessons” as very meager rescue attempts.

So Izuku is a lot better than Katsuki at rescue, even though Izuku kinda sucks at it. And Katsuki recognizes that.

We don’t know what happens after this point.

Have you ever thought about that? We don’t know what happens next! Did Katsuki take Izuku’s hand? Did he shout at Izuku, try to correct him? Did he blow Izuku off and get up by himself? That seems most likely but... What actually happened? We just don’t know!

So then Katsuki goes through life with Izuku chasing him around as that one oddity that doesn’t fit into his mental picture of life. Katsuki doesn’t want it. He doesn’t want to think about it. He doesn’t want to figure out what that means. What the hell is Izuku, and why does he complicate things so much? If Katsuki were to examine it closely, the truth could upend his entire worldview. And that’s terrifying.

So Katsuki fears Izuku’s heart and tries to push him away, because an examination of those questions would lead to facing his weaknesses, those deficiencies he has to correct in order to become a true hero. That’s also terrifying, that he may be bad at something.

It’d be easier if he could just somehow prove once and for all that he’s better than Izuku so he can move on and be done with it. No one else feels like they have to prove themselves against Izuku, not in middle school anyways, but Katsuki says he was actually looking forward to crushing Izuku in the UA entrance exam were they able to compete on the same field. Katsuki is dying for some sort of competition to prove he doesn’t need to think about how Izuku seems to challenge his understanding of the world. Then he can move on and leave Izuku behind forever.

So why would it be absolutely world-shattering if Izuku actually had a quirk the whole time?

If Izuku actually did have a strong quirk, this would explain everything and reaffirm Katsuki’s worldview. Well, except it would prove that Izuku is better than him after all. Izuku’s strength in rescue isn’t a fluke. Katsuki is just a bad teacher.

Katsuki doesn’t understand that he was ever a bully at all. He thinks he’s in a competition of equals. He thinks Izuku gets it, that Izuku sees the world the same way Katsuki does. So he can keep up their vicious competition for a long time.

Until he figures out the secret of One For All and Izuku’s relationship with All Might. Until he realizes Izuku really was quirkless all along.

Only then does Katsuki finally face the truth. He and Izuku never understood each other even a little bit. They both saw something amazing in each other, something they each lacked that the other had. They weren’t equals, they were peers, each with something to teach the other. And neither of them ever succeeded at getting the lesson across.

Not before Deku vs Kacchan 2, anyway.

Once they come to their understanding after that fight, Katsuki starts actively inspiring Izuku, encouraging him, training him, teaching him. And if you’re a manga reader, if you’ve read chapter 284, you know exactly why.