Recipe: Overcrowded Omelette
Ingredients:
– 3 eggs (cracked, like me) – Mushrooms (for the little things I forgot to process) – Red onion (for sharp, sudden thoughts) – Feta (crumbled, like my resolve) – Slices of salame (because something’s always doing the most) – Half an avocado (soft but trying) – Kewpie mayo (for the illusion of control) – A chaotic drizzle of Valentina (for emotional heat) – One tortilla (to wrap it all up and pretend it’s fine)
Instructions:
Scramble the eggs while overthinking a text from 3 days ago.
Add all ingredients to the pan without order or plan. Just like your day.
Panic-fold it when it’s not ready.
Burn one side while contemplating your purpose.
Wrap it in the tortilla. Force a smile. Eat standing up.
Serving Suggestion:
With a side of cry ideally around 11:47 PM, while staring at your calendar. Bonus points if your cat watches in judgmental silence.