The girls chin quivered as she looked around the airport. The passport in her hand and two men in suits standing near her. She looked down at her hands blinking. Things had been so complicated recently, and with her father forcing her away for her own good. She had to say goodbye, that didn’t mean she didn’t want him. In fact her fathers added distaste for him made him all the more satisfying. They were good for each other, bother then she’d ever imagined being. Especially after she tried to break it off with him, she lasted one whole week without him in her life since that day. It was unimaginable now, months had gone by and he was it for her. Not that she’d ever admit it.
When she heard her phone ringing it brought her out of her memories and to the phone screen. It was her father again, trying to make sure she actually got on the plane this time. He’d finally sent two people to make sure she got on the plane, and Ren was tired of fighting it. She hoped the two could make it work out. The girl stuffed her phone into her pocket and looked around, the male was still no where in sight. Her eyes flicked over to the list of flights that were constantly changing. The one to New York had recently been delayed for an hour. If he showed up, she’d be able to hold him for a whole hour until he had to go. Hearing her name woke her up and she closed her eyes letting a pleased smile wrap her lips as she turned around. “You came.” Ren spoke through a tearful smile. “I was scared you weren’t going to come...” She whispered again as her feet picked up hitting the tile as she moved quickly towards him.
goodbye, my hopeless dream. | katherine&erik | flashback
After having a long, withstanding after in the 1500's, Katherine ends their relationship, unable to handle Erik's desire for revenge.
Erik: The pit of his stomach ached unbearably. Erik couldn’t put a finger on what it could have been that was bothering him so much. Disgust, probably. The last decade of knowing the truth of Joslyn Tyrell’s hand in his brother’s death killed him slowly. No, perhaps that was an understatement. The best part of him died the moment the Tyrells thought it was acceptable to deceive a man who followed them in death. He was disgusted because these were the same immortals who offered death to their kind who wronged the world. When in truth, they were the biggest sinners of them all. And what a shame that his mental health was deteriorating for that fact. He was sick in mind and truthfully, dead in body: the only thing he could possibly think of was extracting revenge. And what a shame that the woman he cared deeply for would have to watch him fall deeper into darkness. He was enamored by the brilliant Katherine Smythe – his pursuit for her was undoubtedly the most thrilling, the most strenuous but again, he wanted her and that was the beginning of everything. But how could one possibly love when they are falling apart? The cottage that they resided in rested quietly as it hid their private affairs well however, in fit of rage Erik had thrown it about – broken tables and glass lay on the ground. His fingers fisted the roots of his hair as he sat with his head staring at the ground. With a glass like appearance planted on his face; it was exactly the image of a broken man. Yet another failed attempt at the Tyrells downfall had caused this. At the sound of the door creak open, his eyes tilted before exhaling, “I’ll clean it up,” He said pitifully. Unfortunately that was all he could muster up as he sat in his own self-pity.
Katherine: The sound of destruction greeted her back to the private cottage, causing Katherine to pause and wait patiently just outside for it to cease. She could tell there was only one person inside and no reason for alarm. This was, unfortunately, something she'd grown accustomed to and knew it was best to give him a few moments to collect himself. There was something about Erik that had caught her off guard- from his ability to keep up with her often difficult and complex mind to the way he seemed to challenge her beliefs. There was a spark in him when they began this affair and it brought out more true emotion in her than she'd felt through most of her existence. Yet, over time, she watched as the man she knew faded, consumed with hate and emptiness. It was another familiarity in her life- having seen many of the same symptoms in both Nathaniel and Elizabeth at times, and often felt as though she'd lost them to their hate. Now she lost another. They could be together all they tried, but it was becoming more rare by day that it seemed like Erik was actually there. Discreetly, she made her way inside- her first instinct being to straighten things up as she'd done in the past- for him and for others, but hearing his words, she paused and made her way to where he sat, kneeling in front of him. The large skirt of her black dress pooled around her, her hand reached for his and held onto it- her words felt caught in her throat, as she was always sure to choose her words carefully. "Erik... I... I found out where Nathaniel has been staying.. I was thinking that perhaps I should go see him for a while. He tends to get into trouble if I leave him alone too long." Her tongue caught between her teeth, treading carefully- unsure how he would take the next part. That she wouldn't be coming back to him.
Erik: In all honesty, he knew how pathetic he must look sitting harrowingly sprawled. So untidy and unkempt -- unlike the man who bore a demeanor of confidence so shortly before. Who the hell was Erik Blackwell? The man who failed his brother - the one he allowed to be murdered by Joslyn who was a part of the family that he pledged allegiance to. He hated being that person so he allowed himself to become even more unrecognizable as his eyes blackened by the chaos he determined to inflict. With bleeding knuckles that would soon heal, he flinched as Katherine reached for him. However, his thumb caressed over them gently as she spoke; a good part of him wished he could have been better for her. Her words were far too strategically placed, he thought. As a man who stayed in the presence of a bona fide genius – he took the time to attempt decoding her. With his chin tilted upwards, his blue eyes came upon his inamorata’s, carefully scanning her face before a sad smile crept upon his appearance. “My dear, if I didn’t know any better I would think this to be a goodbye.”
Katherine: The way he looked at her, the words that fell from his lips bit into her conscience. Was she being selfish in leaving him? She cared- more than she realized she was capable of doing for another outside of her siblings- and so much so that she couldn't bear the idea of watching him further go down the damning path of self-destruction. She would always wonder if there was more she could have done, and always come to the same conclusion she had now. You can't fix someone that is unwilling to help themselves. "I say this with all the love I bear, but the last time I looked into a man's eyes and no longer saw him- he shortly after had me turned into a werewolf for eternity." She brought his healing knuckles to her lips, placing a soft kiss on them. "You see, hate... revenge... it does not only destroy you, but every person and thing around you." Placing his hands back down gently, Katherine took a deep breath. She always had a tactic to compartmentalize emotions by importance as to not allow them to get in the way of what was most important- a tactic that was failing her now as a sadness filled her gaze. "Our time together has been one of the most unique and treasured experiences in my time, and I feel it is most important to protect the integrity of that and remember it for it has been, not the path it's set upon now."
Erik: Yet another thing was falling apart right in front of his eyes, it hurt him so with his last ounce of humanity to hear the words she spoke. “Katherine, my love – I’m not like …” He pauses briefly. No, perhaps he couldn’t say he wasn’t like Rowan Smythe. For the history of the wolves was born the day a broken man traded his children after the murder of his beloved wife. While he hadn’t done anything so drastic, Erik couldn’t necessarily say that he wouldn’t do something in the same measure of that if it meant having revenge. Anything to fill the void. As her hands left his, he closes his eyes whilst taking a deep breath before his fist clenched. His voice rises with exasperation, “Don’t you see? They’ve done this to me, Katherine!” Suddenly, he can feel his temper rise once more, “These fucking people are so God damn sick – they think they can do whatever they want. They’re the monsters and they’ve created a monster of me. They take a man’s loyalty and throw it back – they deserve to pay. They took your mother and they took my brother. I just can’t stand the idea of – I just can’t Katherine, I can’t.” His fingers grip the roots of his hair, “I need you – I need you here with me, I’ll try, I’ll try to be better.” It wasn’t anything he hadn’t said a thousand times before. “I need you to understand. Please.”
Katherine: His hesitance and inability to finish his sentence only confirmed what Katherine had feared- that she was right, as was the burden she usually bore. The hazel-green iris' of her eyes watched as the anger distorted his features, a sight she had unfortunately grown accustomed to as of lately. Everything that they had worked for- their time together, the secrets kept from her family- it was crumbling before them and she was unfortunately the one that had to put an end to it before it only worsened. Yet, it felt like something had taken a grip of her heart and dropped it into her stomach, a feeling she hadn't felt often in her life. His pleading only served to cause her to fight back the tears that threatened to fill her eyes. "I am sorry, darling... so very sorry but.." Her forehead pressed to his, hands shifting to his sides. "Please do not ask me watch you perish because I already know that will be your fate if you continue on this path. I wish I could help you.. but not like this. I will not stand by and watch you destroy yourself. I hope with everything I am that one day you will find yourself again.. and if you do, find me then. I know you have been terribly wronged, as many of us have, but by letting your anger take away who you are, you're letting them win. I miss who you were, and you'll always have a piece of my heart, but I can't stay." Her eyes closed as she did her best to explain her reasoning, hoping he could somehow understand, before pressing her lips to his gently. While she wasn't sure what he would think of that, she needed to do it. It was the only way she knew to say goodbye.
Erik: Where he felt the pit of his stomach ache merely minutes before, it was replaced with a sharp pain. Her words became the knife in his abdomen as she spoke her truths. Funny thing, things only hurt if they’re true and Katherine, as typically polite mannered she was, merely announcing her terrible truths. Perhaps he should have thanked her for the honesty, after all – he was torn apart by lies. But yet he couldn’t, the selfish part of loving someone was praying that they’d stay in their darkest hour. But unfortunately, this darkness rendered a person blind, incapable of finding the light. “I will not stand by and watch you destroy yourself.” Those words struck him again as they were accompanied by her gentle touch. Impulsively, he took her hand to his still, dead heart, and his right hand on her wrist while keeping it to his chest. As he bent to her ear, “If I’ll always have a piece of your heart then the least you can do is take mine with you.” A deadly proposition considering he did not mean it in the metaphoric sense. No, Erik was asking her to literally have her rip it from his chest ending his five hundred year term of life. He was pleading now, “It’s quite alright, Katherine. I’d rather have you do it then those bastards,” If the Tyrells knew of what terrible things Erik would inflict on them then they would offer him the kiss of death. Something about being killed by the heavily unrighteous bothered him to his core. No, at least Katherine – she was a victim to their destruction and right then, right there; he could at least die with a shred of dignity. “I miss who I was too.”
Katherine: Her fingers gripped into the cloth over his chest, stopping herself from even contemplating his devastating request. Physically, it was what she was meant to do- an instinct embedded in who she'd become the moment she'd been turned into a werewolf. Their entire purpose for living an eternity was meant to eliminate vampires everywhere, but her heart- and mind, for that matter- were stronger than an instinct. "I wish I was strong enough to do that for you, but I could never bear it." In a way, she understood why he would request her to take his life- pride. Better to lose your life willingly to a lover than against an enemy, but selfishly, she could not. "I would never let them kill you, Erik... not in a million years. That I can do. But I need you to let me go." Her grip loosened from him, pulling away as she promised him the only thing she could.
Erik: Although he did not feel the agony of having his only vital organ ripped from his chest, Erik could not decide whether or not it caused him relief or disappointment that she did display her nature’s right. She could neither watch him waste away and she could not bring herself to end his rather pitiful life. It was the state of limbo for Erik, while he desired to tear the Tyrell’s world apart; perhaps what was keeping him from throwing himself into it completely was Katherine. Or perhaps that was what he needed to tell himself to paint her as the offender in this break up. With another exhale of his lungs, his lips pressed to her forehead once more, “I want you to stay,” He started but shook his head, “But because I love you, I’ll let you go.” As the vampire stepped back, he pivoted to turn his back to her, “Don’t ever let the world change you like it changed me, Katherine.” Erik then kneeled to the ground picking up a shard of glass, “I’ll clean it up.”
Katherine: The feeling of his lips pressed against her skin, followed shortly after by the absence of him left her shaken, the reality of what they, what she, had just done settling in. This affair they'd because so invested in, that she was willing to lie and hide from her family for- extinguished with only words. But Katherine always knew the power of well-placed words. There was not a single one she could think of for a proper goodbye, for she knew that she would see him again one day. They had eternity, and surely she knew their paths would cross again- the would was only so large, after all. Quietly, she left as subtly as she entered, choosing to walk her way back to the closest village. But first, she left a parting gift. A painting left just outside the small cottage. It was her newest fascination- painting, even though in the era they were in, it wasn't deemed appropriate for a woman... not that it mattered to her much. In the detailed brush strokes were two familiar figures, elegantly dancing and free. It was how she hoped he would remember this relationship, as she wished to. What they were, not what it had become. Katherine would break down on her way back the village, sobs wracking through her body as she accepted what was, but she'd collect herself- finding her family and continuing on as she always had.
Today was a really good day catching up and just laughing and being silly together. I really like this friendship we've developed, and it hasn't been easy - but I really appreciate it.
I think we're both at good points in our lives and we've both grown up a lot. We're still trying to figure out what's going on and are both a little lost, but we're certainly not the messes we were way back when.
Haha, I keep writing the same things about you. That you're a good person and a good friend and that everything is just solid hahaha it makes me smile just thinking about it.
We used to be so close. Truly good friends. What happened? At some point, both of us stopped caring a little bit. And then a little bit more. And then a little bit more. We grew apart and changed, and although it’s sad, I’ve come to accept it somewhat. Life and experiences change people, and we can’t expect that same people will always be around to care for us and to talk to us. People changing is something that’s often feared, but shouldn’t be. It signifies growth. In others and in ourselves, and we should embrace that. So maybe we lose a couple of friends along the way. That’s life. We find new ones. We lose them. And the cycle continues. It’s just a reminder that life goes on and we move on and people shift and adapt to their ever changing lives and that’s truly beautiful.
Theo had his eyes locked on Bentleys. Brown being smothered in Blue. Bright, bright, bright blue. Theo loved those eyes. Scrunching his eyebrows for a moment, Theo pushed the shirt slightly up the tan, tan, tan, hips. So tan. Even in March he was golden. So, so, so lovely. Bentley was so lovely. Digging his fingers into the flesh at his hip, Theo pressed him up against the little rickety desk in his living room. "You want me to fuck you, hm? Like the dirty little slut you are?" He said. Breath hot against Bentleys face. "Get up on the desk." He said, pressing his boy harder into the desk, so his lower back dug into it. But he wasn't really his boy anymore, was he? That was Theo's fault. But it was for the best, he'd convinced himself. Running his fingers through his hair to push it back off his forehead, Theo quickly unbuttoned Bentleys pants button. Sticking his hand down the front of his pants to grip the boys cock. Pressing his lips to the corner of his mouth.
