#pachijustbequiet

[rustyhubris]

Ugh, apparently my tags are broken on the side of my blog, and I want to look at the past, so I'm putting tags I remember here

[rustyhubris]

I "joked" to my colleague the other day that I go on tumblr when I want to feel terrible, and that isn't entirely untrue, but I also do realize that I come here when I want to indulge in teenager-like behaviours. I regress here, I revert to something I once was. My pontification in journal posts like this that no one will read comes out, I vaguepost about the people in my life who are driving me crazy (for good or ill), and I reblog fan art and dumb jokes with no rhyme or reason (I've always been lazy when it comes to tagging).

[rustyhubris]

Embracing my neurodivergency and my deep love of vocaloids. Listen fuckers: this depressing happy sounding music has carried me through so much and I refuse to let it go. I will teach everyone I can about vocaloids (except my students because there is a line).

[rustyhubris]

Getting older as someone who grew up on the internet is realizing just how annoying you actually were back then, and fighting to maintain that sense of empathy and perspective as you engage with the many people on the internet who are, in fact, children

[rustyhubris]

I kind of miss back in the day when I would come here and just... Be sad. I don't really have a place to be sad anymore except for my head, and if I keep all of my sad in there I think my head will literally explode, one way or another.

It's really hard to do your work when you're suffering from a mental breakdown and you're contemplating the logistics of checking yourself in somewhere and whether or not you'd still be paid. Who would take over your classes? Would they do a better or worse job than you? Would it matter?

Anyway, another post to add to the pile of evidence for my psychiatrist - if I ever get one.

[rustyhubris]

Welp I wanna die

[rustyhubris]

I'm going to miss tumblr as my semi private void to shout into.

[rustyhubris]

I had upwards of two people (adults) today comment to me about how they wanted to climb into the bath bomb sink at Lush today. And like, sure. Knock yourself out. If you want to make the effort to undress and crawl into the sink, I ain't gonna stop you.

I mean, I'll call security - but I won't stop you.