#packing talk

[mssirey]

To anyone who wonders if they can pack while maintaining their femininity, hear me out: a penis is not masculine. Just as gender does not have genitalia, genitalia does not have gender. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! 💙

[mssirey]

So I’ve been packing with socks for a while and am seriously looking into buying a packer. I was wondering what would be best for packer gear. Like I know the actual packer I want but like briefs or a harness kinda thing? If you have any advice I’d appreciate it so much

Hey! So, without knowing the exact packer you’re considering, here’s what I can say:

If you’re thinking about soft packing, briefs can be okay. There are a ton of packing specific briefs out there, and a lot of people I’ve talked to shop at rodeoh.

If you’re hard packing or packing for play, a harness is gonna be your friend.

For me, harnesses are tricky, cause of my own barriers in what I’m looking for, so I only use them for play, and thus I can’t give any personal advice for them.

But I would recommend checking out testimonials/product trials on YouTube. You can see someone model the gear and listen to them talk through their experiences with it. You can search for any product and someone will have made videos about it. Try to find someone who talks about the types of things that are most important to your own needs, whatever they are. (You can also search for the packer you’re looking at and see what other people paired with it)

But if looking at videos is uncomfortable, the best general advice I can give is: since you know the packer you want, I’d search for your other gear from the same place, cause they’ll better suit the packers they offer.

Hope something in there helps! Good luck and happy packing 💙

[mssirey]

hi um maybe this is a dumb question but I'm very new to packing - you and drfitzmonster and the packing au encouraged me to bite the bullet so to speak and get one - and I realized I don't know how it works? Like does it just sit against you or do you have to get a sack for your sack? sorry if this is dumb I just don't know who to ask about these things

hey anon! firstly, i am so proud of you for exploring yourself and taking the leap into the world of packing! (and no question is a dumb question)

next, i will point out that packing can look very different, person to person. 

some people will use a sock or bit of fabric to form a bulge. i’ve only done this a handful of times, but i found that for myself it was most comfortable when i put that in the overlap of fabric at the front of my boxer briefs. i didn’t like the feeling of the sock directly against me, but that is a personal choice.

there is underwear out there that is specifically designed for packing, and most trans run or trans friendly sites offer them. i don’t own any of those myself, so i can’t make recommendations. i have a lot of boxer briefs with little package hammocks and those suit my needs pretty well. 

you will want to think about whether you want a soft packer, a stand to pee packer, a ‘for play’/hard packer, and explore the options within each of those areas. what you choose is going to determine a lot about how you go about packing (whether it sits directly against you or not). 

a lot of packers come with adhesive options, and if that works for you, your underwear won’t be the main thing keeping your bulge in place. harnesses and/or specifically designed packing underwear are still recommended for larger bulges.

and then your personal life (like how active/mobile you are in day to day life) might inform different decisions. if you are moving a lot, your bulge is more likely to shift, and that can be really uncomfortable/dysphoric, and so you might want to explore options that do keep your packer more snug. 

(i’m just kinda rambling off the top of my head and am by no means an expert, but i hope something i said helps, and certainly anyone is welcome to chime in with their own advice!)

[mssirey]

not new to packing but thanks for just talking about it at all! Packing has always been one of those things that while it helps me feel more settled I feel embarrassed or ashamed to talk about, even if I'm talking to other people who maybe also pack. So just seeing the conversations floating around here are really comforting

i know exactly what you mean! i touched on this a little (but from lena’s pov), where comfort in private is not measured on the same scale as comfort in public. there are always a lot of things to consider, and sometimes the math just doesn’t work the way you want. talking about packing and normalizing it, even if just within this little bubble of fandom, goes a long way. and this past week has helped me to feel more confident putting packing in my own writing! el mayarah, friend! 

[mssirey]

Do you have any musings on how Zed feels about packing? I love your boy so much and all this packing talk has me in my own transguy feels I was just wondering if you’ve any ideas on him or how Lena/his partners might feel about it (if you’re comfortable sharing of course otherwise please just know I love Zed and your writing dearly!)

I do absolutely have thoughts about Zed packing!! (gonna just rattle off a bunch of thoughts at once)

Packing is something that Zed didn’t explore right away. For him, it didn’t feel essential in the same way that binding did, or changing his name, or cutting his hair. There was security in those actions, necessity even. They protected him from the harshest aches that clawed at his gut.

But packing was something that landed more on the side of something he wanted, but didn’t need. He couldn’t picture it being something world changing for himself, and had no hatred for his body. His dysphoria was largely connected to outward presentation, the way his appearance or his name changed the way people acted, and packing wasn’t something he needed to counter those hurts.

However, when he did finally try packing, he was surprised by how it alleviated pressure he didn’t know he was shouldering. There was an unexpected weightlessness to it, and a large part of him that wished he had tried it sooner.

He is rarely bold packing in public, preferring to pack for himself than for show, but if Nia takes him to a club, he has definitely opted for a large bulge from time to time.

I see him with a lot of different lovers, honestly.

Lena loves his cock, both soft and hard. She also really loves to sit in his lap. (Lena very much wants him to be whole within himself, above anything else. She is super gentle and tender, as I have written her with Kara)

Sam loves to peg him as Lena sucks him off, so there’s that. (Sam is gentle in a similar manner to Lena, but tends to ask more questions and seeks to understand more actively)

Andrea wants him hard always, but doesn’t always get what she wants, lolol! (Andrea doesn’t make a big deal of him packing at all, and is much more of the mind of ‘well, put it to good use’)

Alex only rolls her eyes when he’s super showy, or if he does that thing where he sidles up behind his partner as gently nudges his bulge against their ass. She tries very hard to ignore that and he tries not to do it when she’s around.

[mssirey]

I just wanted to take a moment to say thank you to everyone who has been engaging with the packing related talk/content. I have been writing because that is how I process and express my feelings, but having people reach out and hearing how it resonates, that reminds me of its importance in my own life. I have let a lot of my own personal journey fall to the backburner--things I have been meaning to try for myself, but have left untouched for some time--and its so nice to feel like this is an area where I can start moving forward again. 

Thank you and el mayarah!

[mssirey]

Fun (?) fact! You were the one who really introduced me to packing and now i desperately want a packer of my own so thanks but no thanks?????

haha dysphoria go brrrr

No but really though you really did introduce me into a whole aspect of myself i didnt know was there so thank you

aww, hey, i'm glad to have helped! that italicized oh moment can really get ya asdklfjhsd

i hope you get a chance to pick one up in the near future!

[mssirey]

what do the newly awakened packing peoples need to hear today? how can i make you feel amazing about yourself?? tell me!!!!