#panda thoughts

[sleepy12ftpanda]

a dnd setting where Clerics and Paladins cast their spells by literally eating god flesh to take on their holy attributes because humanity had long since slain their divine oppressors to harvest their corpses for power

[More lore in notes.]

[theinsatiablepanda]

I hope your “fuck it why not” never turns into damn why did I do that? Or a damn I wish I never did that.

I hope your fuck it why nots turn into:

Damn that felt good

Damn I should have done that sooner

Damn I’m glad I trusted my intuition

Fuck it next time we go harder!!!

[happypanda101]

Okay. So I probably might get a lot of hate for this post but I wanted to voice my thoughts.

The anti/proship wars are so fucking stupid. Why? Because each sides views are black and white.

Anti’s don’t seem to understand how to not send literal fucking death threats, and proshippers get angry and rant about being attacked when someone voices why they see a ships as problematic or wrong, and why they feel it shouldn’t be shipped.

Proship doesn’t automatically mean pedophile. It means that they are people who are willing to explore tabo topics. And not everyone who voices their concerns over a ship is an anti.

I want to say that not all anti’s doxx, but… there’s two much shit on your sides, folks. Just please stop harassing and bullying people.

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk

[taixju]

Could you bless me us with some ✨dilf Jean✨ ? (at first I was like ... hmm dilf as a joke 👀 show me it’s not a joke anymore pleaaaase 🌻🌻 )

SUNFLOWER ANON!!! 💛💛💛 OMGGG DILF JEAN ??? The freaking possibilitiesssss 🥵🥵🥵

scenario 1: you go to a club w friends and Jean eyes you from the bar. Ends up buying you a drink. At first you think it’s kind of creepy cause he’s an older guy, but somehow along the way you find yourself being absolutely ✨railed✨ by dilf Jean in the parking lot atop the hood of his car 🥴 maybe it’s the alcohol that got to you...or maybe you just discovered you had a thing for pervy older men 😏

older boyfriend jean. he’s a lawyer. the top dog. successful af. rich. you’re basically his sugar baby. he takes such good care of you. but when he’s working, he likes to be left alone in his study - that’s the rule. And you know it. but you were feeling a little devious today; during his online meeting, you sneak into his office and make your way over, crawling until your at his feet, under his desk. while he’s occupied, most likely giving an important presentation, you decide the punishment you’d receive after would be worth everything you were about to do. feeling lonely, you decide to show ur daddy a little love - sucking him off during his important meeting SKKSSKK daddy jean will just have to show you what happens to naughty girls 😫🥵🥴

scenario 3: immediately I think of the step dad trope but i literally cannot picture step dad jean for the life of me

I WENT A LITTLE CRAZY BUUUUT IDK ABOUT YOU BUT SCENARIO 2 IS LOOKING REALLY TEMPTING 🥴🥴🥴 GIVE ME SOME NUMBERS FROM THE MENU BB !!!

[xoxopandapanda]

Imma do Inukag week 2020 before 2020 is over.

I swear.

I SWEAR it.

[1petulantpanda]

Unloaded and stacked 250 bales of hay today. I have another 100 bales to get into the barn tomorrow, and 45 bales of mulch hay to spread over the back pasture.

It’s hard work, often dirty work, but nothing compares to the joy I find in farming. It’s in my blood, my grandmother says, this love of working with animals and the land, a gift from her father to me.

I should really be asleep now, but I’m sitting out in the barn, listening to the horses munch on hay. It’s chilly tonight, and the barn smells like sweet hay and horses. I can’t think of any place I’d rather be.

[sleepy12ftpanda]

Were-jellyfish are either fucking terrifying or hilarious.

There is no in between.

[sleepy12ftpanda]

Today I learned that sesame street is canonically a sovereign nation state recognized by the International Olympic Committee.

Just thought you should know that.