He is Dancing.
I was in bed pretending to sleep, but knowing full well that i couldn't until i'd written this.
last weekend it was my friends birthday party. i got there late because i had to work. everyone was talking about the joys of the evening, and because i wasn't there to enjoy any of it, i felt a little outcast and insecure.
we all went to a friends house to party. i went as well, bringing all my insecurity with me. they put on some sweet 80's music and everyone was dancing and having a really good time.
except me!
i sat on the couch, and then went to the other room to read a book! lame, i know.
you know, i always thought i've hated dancing. but i remember a year and a half ago when i was dancing with my friends and having a great time. We were doing the thriller dance by Micheal Jackson, and i loved it so much!
i remember spending a whole week dreading that dance party, because i thought i couldn't dance, and because i was afraid of stepping out.
what happened was amazing though. i danced and i couldn't stop smiling! everything was fun and fast and loud and beautiful.
i held the hands of my friends and thought to myself, what the heck was i so afraid of?
i went back home from YWAM free and liberated and now, unafraid of dancing at parties and gigs.
but i think somewhere along the line, i let my insecurities tell me that i couldn't allow myself to enjoy myself, and let go of a little control once in a while.
this post is me remembering that i do love dancing. and that i have the ability to control what i do, even if it means losing a little control.
sorry to the girl who i told that dancing and parties was something i hated. i don't. i love them.
i just hate the way i let my silly little insecurities walk all over me.
freedom was something i had once. this is the start of me chasing it down again!
i want to share with you the things you love. and if i enjoyed spazz dancing with my friends from YWAM, then i'm sure as heck going to enjoy it even more with you!
Sorry for being so fast to shut down the idea.
I love you :)
P.S. thanks for being you.