what do you think is the size difference between a human and a Patapon ?
i actually made a chart about a year ago that can help answer this question! (link — 18+ warning for exposed genitalia + my very obvious hyper fetish)
i'd assume that barapon is the around the height of an average human male, so using the chart as a reference... yeah, pons (and by extension zigotons/karmens/akumatans/bonedeth) are all pretty tiny, even as dekas.
but this is just my personal headcanon, as always! i love the idea of pons being easily holdable (and usable as a living fleshlight)... but, yknow, it's probably not the most convenient nor realistic size for them to be.
also.. i just realized that i'd completely forgotten to consult pata3 for the actual uberhero-to-patapon height difference. nor did i include megapons on that chart...dang, i should update it. oops
OMG I JUST CHECKED AND DEKAPONS ARE LIKE HALF A FOOT TALLER THAN UBERHEROES. HOLY SHIT. that's hot as fuck
The Hatapon talk on your other blog... I keep opening Tumblr again to look at it.......
-Rin
AWW IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE IT!!! i'm having so much fun with it all too eeeeee 🥹
although, that does remind me that i need to make some character tags so it's easier to find specific asks... but obviously i can't have them be the normal tags unless i want to scar some poor innocent people for life lol
wondering how i should format it though. hm. ideas/examples:
#pataporn hatapon
#hatapon nsfw
#mel0 hatapon (because idk... they're from my asks n all...)
I want to do things to patapons, but at the same time... they don't have a throat to grab and press them against the wall, or to bite. They don't have ears to bite or hair to pull. They have so little body surface to grind against because the eye is taking the whole room. I can't imagine pressing them against the wall at all because their eye would be pressed against me or the wall.
I'm very conflicted. If they were at least like Uberhero...
ahh, you're not using your imagination to the highest potential, anon! /silly
maybe i should draw some uberhero x patapon art to help illustrate some positions. or maybe barapon x patapon? since (imo) they would be much bigger and more human-sized.
as something boring that might nonetheless be of some comfort—pons (and the other tribesmen) likely have a sort of protective film over their eye, since they're such a vital part of their body yet take up such a large expanse of it. like a nictitating membrane but it's permanently in-place and invisible. since it's a membrane and all, it'll still be nice and soft & squishy like the rest of their bodies~ you could grind directly against their eye and they wouldn't feel a thing! well, besides you pressing on it, of course. but it wouldn't scratch or hurt too bad unless you make it hurt, if you catch my drift... point is, hopefully that can relieve you of some of your concerns in terms of positioning.
ah frick, i can't say it directly...damn censors...
[backspaces]
"as a certified pats a pond identifier, i would indeed say that this is a pats a pond. no phantom could ever be this sexy"— GOD DAMMIT, YOU CAN'T SAY SHIT IN THIS KIDS' GAME!!!
[aggressive backspaces]
"phantoms are very sexy"
okay now why was that allowed. i mean it's true, but...my very clear bias toward pons...
"it's simple, really. to figure this out, all we have to do is lock them in a room together and watch them fight for dominance using nothing but their"—
just sayiiin, Meden too has a long staff with a bee end.
oh fuck. you're right.
after word of hatapon's actions start making rounds (not just the lies he'd made to cover it up), she becomes hyper-aware of the existence of her own staff. that is, she felt as though everyone were suddenly giving her glances here and there in judgement, assumptions that she would be doing the same. these glances were, of course, imagined, but her anxiety built up quickly.
with that anxiety brought along intrusive thoughts. what if she did the same thing? what if she just tried it? meden was absolutely mortified that her brain could even come up with such a thing. she gripped on tightly to her staff, hand sweaty and slipping. she hoped no one could tell that she was shaking and breathing heavy.
what made it worse was the thoughts starting to tell her more and more details. how it'd feel. how she'd scream. how the ornaments would stretch her further than her fingers. how it'd be able to ram deep into her, slamming against her walls harder and faster than she'd ever been able to manage on her own.
meden felt guilty enough just touching herself. her own sins haunted her constantly. what would kami think? what if he already knows? what if he could hear her thoughts right now, daydreaming about such a horrible thing? her face grew redder and redder by the second. some of the townsfolk were giving her glances now—worried ones with whispers that only made her fears (and excitement) spiral ever higher.
someone eventually walked up to her and asked if she was okay. she snapped out of her panicked trance with a yelp, and stuttered out that she was just feeling unwell. a few others stopped by as well to check on her, saying she needed to get some rest. no, she thought, because that means i'll give in to my sinful thoughts. she couldn't say this out loud, of course, and she didn't have the voice or strength to come up with some other excuse.
so instead, she trudged slowly toward her elaborate and well-decorated cabin, fit for a woman of her status. the same cabin that creaks and complains as her body shakes wildly and paints the floorboards with her love, her muffled pleasure desperately trying to release itself from behind her clasped hand. as her body relaxed, the staff slipped out of her with a clank, freshly soaked beyond recognition.
meden had never been more disappointed in herself, but was even more furious at hatapon for daring to introduce the idea in the first place. perhaps she should have a word with him... she thought of this as she rested in the afterglow and giggled weakly. she's such a disgrace.
https://www.tumblr.com/kelocitta/612599350727737345/what-are-they-thinking-about?source=share I may have an idea but I shouldn't say it over there
"What are they thinking about" OH WOW I WONDER HMM definitely not that delicious size difference noooooo~ (fucking LOOK AT THEM THOUGH holy shit. so good)
Throws my million (five </3) Guardia headcannons at you from an AU I can't explain
Hhhh pretty body ,, very nicely built to be able to take heavy damage and hold up her shield (hip dips oooooooh)
Kinda like Haru from Beastars but if she was a little more mean and looked like Juno
I like to think that after just throwing herself at men she liked, she would eventually find one guy that treated her nicely ,, Grenburr if you want them to have a nice peaceful life with a child and retire early or Pingrek if you want semi-toxic yuri that turns sweet
Shes pretty high level to me along with Charibasa, Grenburr, Myamsar, Cannogabang, and Jamsch
Her wool is known for being one of the softest things ever
ough she's the perfect woman... strong, beautiful, and mean.. AND!!! soooo soft & fluffy!!!! genuinely cant decide between grenburr or pingrek tho omg... both sound so good </333 mayhaps she shouldn't have to choose.. mayhaps Both At Once.?
tw for zoophilia, pedophilia (kinda), cannibalism, necrophilia, grooming, dubcon, incest, underage sex… yeahhh B) all that fun stuff
Kami knows that Pan Pakapon will do anything for a bite of meat, so that’s easy enough to take advantage of. The pounds quickly start piling on top of each other, which only encourages Kami more.
Fah Zakpon’s job also includes taking care of the horse stables. (not really, but we’re pretending.) It doesn’t take long for curiosity to get the best of him with both the mares and stallions… if only Hatapon would’ve thought of stopping by! He could’ve made good use of the horses, too. But back to the topic at hand—he definitely also fucks that plant. Just look at those vines, man…
Ohh, Kon Kimpon…so fluffy and cute… Dude’s definitely got a foot fetish after staying around that damn mountain 24/7. Goes hiding and jerks off to the thought of rubbing his body between those toes and tickling them with his fuzz.
When the tribe is running low on meat during a poor hunting season, Rah Gashapon resorts to luring stray pons and harvesting their meat. Can’t have the tribe going hungry! Plus, he keeps their caps and makes sure they can respawn easy—they don’t remember their deaths. To tenderize the meat, he’s got a special technique he uses as his victims fade out of consciousness…
You wouldn’t think it by looking at him, but Ton Kampon is a bit of a masochist himself. He’s cautious, however, and won’t do damage to himself that would be obvious to others that it hadn’t come from his job. On occasion, he gets the thought in his head to plop his cock & balls on Fwoosh Famooze and stamp them with his hammer… though he’s too shy to take the risk just yet.
As he’s in a position of power over Beruru, it doesn’t take long for Shuraba Yapon to groom her into letting him slip up under her “skirt”. Not much else to elaborate on here; it’s pretty self-explanatory.
Tsukucest. That’s it, that’s the whole description lol. They prod each other’s holes with their sticks. And they’re rather wholesome about it, too! Surprisingly fluffy for brothers in a hidden incestuous relationship. If anybody has found out about them, they haven’t said anything… probably because they’re young and “will grow out of it”. Yeah, right.
I could probably write better things for everyone, but this is what I could come up with on the spot lol… thank you for asking tho, this was fun!! hopefully I didn’t scare you off hehe
