Could you please write some pokkupikku? Thank you 💕
Sometimes they just need to hug everything out 💕
Can You Hold Me
GalliPieck. Canonverse.
544 words.
He didn’t leave his room after the ship from Paradis returned. He lay in his bed, rotting away as he mourned the loss of his brother, even though he knew from the very beginning that Marcel would never return. It was a plan that was years to plans and even more years to carry out but one that held too many risks and hardly any reward, at least for them. They might as well have sent those four warriors away in coffins. It would have been just the same, Porco thinks.
He doesn’t stir when the door to his room opens. He simply closes his eyes, hoping that whoever has walked in will leave him alone once they believe he’s sleeping. He recognizes the footsteps though – light and quiet like the person is gliding across the floor instead of walking. It’s Pieck. She’ll be too stubborn to leave him even if he was really sleeping. He might as well just admit that he’s awake right now, but he doesn’t feel like talking to her at all. Instead, he squeezes his eyes tighter, curling up and turning so that he doesn’t have to face her.
“I know you’re awake,” she tells him. She walks over to the other side of the bed, kneeling so that she can look at his face. Her hand touches his face gently, wiping away a tear from his cheek. “Are you going to hide here forever?”
He rolls onto his other side. Before this, he would have lashed out at her, perhaps yelled at her leave him alone, but now he just doesn’t have the energy for that. He just wants to be allowed this time to mourn the loss of his Marcel.
“I don’t want to talk right now, Pieck,” he sighs. Even just these simple words make him feel more exhausted. His lungs feel heavy, his body numb. It’s strange how he can feel this way and yet not fall asleep. He could do with some sleep right now. It might make him forget everything around him for a while.
“Do you want me to leave?” Pieck asks. She hovers at the corner of the bed, somewhere in between taking a seat at the end of his bed or leaving him entirely.
A second ago, he would have said yes. He’s never been one for company while he was drowning himself in his sorrows, but he takes a glance at Pieck and he recognizes the expression on her face. It’s the same one he wears, full of pain and hurt and loss. What a fool he was to believe he was the only one hurting. He may have lost a brother, but she has lost people on that ship as well.
“Can you hold me?” he whispers.
She doesn’t answer. She simply slides into the bed beside him, wrapping her arms around him. He finds comfort and warmth in resting his head on her breast, his own arms around her waist. Her hair brushes against his face, tickling his cheek, but he leaves it there because doesn’t want to leave the solace he finds in her arms. He falls asleep to the sound of her heart, the slow and steady beat reminding him that they have each other.
The first time she leaves, Porco tells her not to go. Marcelhad only left a few days ago. Paradis, a heavenly name for an island ofmonsters. There are moments when he just stares at the door, waiting for hisbrother to walk through, but then he remembers where he really is.
“They have weapons, don’t they?” Porco asks as he watches hertie up her hair and prepare for battle on the outskirts of Marley where she’llbe meeting the other Eldian warriors to fight whatever new enemy Marley hasfound for themselves.
“Yes, and I’m one of them,” Pieck says. If she’s angry aboutbeing used, she doesn’t show it. She just says it like it’s a fact, somethingshe can’t change. She turns her head to look at him and gives him a smile. “Don’tlook at me so forlornly. You’ll make it difficult for me to leave.”
“I’ll come back,” she says to him. But how can she be sosure?
He doesn’t trust people when they leave. They might nevercome back. He knows this better than most people. It’s been years since hisbrother and the others had left. There hasn’t been word from them about wherethey are or how they’re doing. When she tells him she has to go, he can’t helpbut cling to her even though he knows his pleading will not be enough to keepher here
“I didn’t know you’vegotten so attached to me,” Pieck jokes. She pats him affectionately on the headlike she does the other young cadets that are training to become warriors justlike them. “There’s nothing to worry about. I’ll be with Zeke after all. It’llbe like the other battles we fight for Marley. It will just take a littlelonger, but I’ll come back.”
He doesn’t trust her words. She’s smart, but she can’t tellthe future. Only fate decides who lives and dies, and she doesn’t know if she’llbe one of the lucky ones. And yet there’s something comforting in her promiseto him even if it’s a promise she can’t keep.
“You’ll come back,” he repeats hoarsely.
She pulls away from him as soon as he loosens his grip aroundher. “I’ll come back for you because I know you’re lonely without me,” shelaughs. She caresses his cheek lightly with the back of her hand. “So wait forme, okay?”
When she finally comes home, she looks exhausted. She canhardly stand up even with the help of her crutch, and yet he can’t help but runto her, holding her tightly as if he’s afraid she might just slip away again.
“You came back,” he whispers.
Pieck laughs shakily. Although she’s returned, she’s crying. “Itold you I would come back for you, didn’t I?” she tells him. Her breathing isuneven as she tries to choke back sobs. “But, Pokko, Marcel couldn’t come back.A lot of them…they couldn’t come back.”
The words she says open a void in him. He wants to say thatit’s okay, that only a miracle would have to happen in order for everyone tocome home, but all he can do is hold her tightly and not let go.
“Don’t wander too far off the battlefield by yourself,” hetells her when they finally return from another victorious battle. War isalways exhausting, but it’s even more so as a Titan shifter. While he canregenerate and heal his wounds quickly, the bullets still hurt whether he’s ahuman or a Titan.
“What’s this? Are you worried about me,” Pieck asks amusedly.She is collapsed on his bed. She’s always resting in his bed even though he’stold her to stop since she wrinkles the sheets too much and never bothers tostraighten them out when she gets up. She props herself up on an elbow. “Youdon’t have to keep protecting me, you know. I’ve been doing this longer thanyou have. Besides, I have my beloved Panzer squad with me to keep me safe.”
Her new armor is definitely a well-needed upgrade thatprotects her from attacks, but it’s not like it makes her invincible. Hemutters something about how she’s being too careless, but she only laughs athim.
“You worry too much, Pokko,” she tells him. She sits up tokiss him on the cheek. “But even if I go too far, I’ll always come back foryou.”
That’s always been true for now, but he can’t help but thinkthat there’ll be a day where she’ll leave and never return.
“Stay close to me,” he tells her as the city descends intochaos. He has to shout in order to be heard, but he knows she won’t listen tohim anyway. She’s always going off to follow what she thinks is the best planof attack even if it means throwing herself in danger.
“I’ll be fine,” she tells him. She’s run off, transformedinto a Titan and running off with the Panzer squad on her back in order to facetheir new enemy – Eren Jaeger.
But she’s not fine when he finds her, bleeding out and bodybroken. She insists that she is, muttering nonsense about how she’s fine and howshe can regenerate. The pain is too much for her to concentrate on healingherself and he knows that now it’s too late to do anything.
And yet he calls to her, pleading with her to come back eventhough he knows it’s useless. “Come back,” he says desperately. He attempts tostop the blood, but she’s already lost so much. “You said you’d come back,Pieck, so come back!”
“I will,” she says, her voice barely a whisper now. “I’llcome back…for you…”
But she’s slipping away, leaving him already, and he knows thistime she won’t come back.
Since 104 is right around the corner is it okay if you write a fic wherein Pieck lets say survives and lives through what happened to her. And when she wakes up at the infirmary to find Porco sitting beside her. Similar to the scene in season 1 with Eren and Mikasa. Thank you and hope you have a nice day!
I was gonna write something bittersweet but then went for all the angst cuz I just wanna *clenches fist* break your hearts and destroy your souls :D
Hold Me Close
Gallipieck. Canonverse.
560 words.
When she wakes up, there’s a dull ache throughout her entirebody. It’s a familiar sensation that follows after healing large wounds orregenerating limbs, something she should be used to after all these years, but it still hurts every time. She groans as she tries to sit up, but it takes too muchenergy and she collapses back onto the bed. The person who sits at her bedsidegently shushes her, a hand reaches for hers and squeezes it tightly.
She opens her eyes and turns her head to see the personseated beside her. “Pokko,” she says, smiling weakly. She reaches for his face,stroking his cheek. “You’re okay. I’m glad.”
She can tell that he wants to scold her for being so recklessin battle, for nearly dying like he always does whenever they come back fromthe battlefield, but her wounds must be bad because he bites back whatever hewants to say and forces a smile on his face. “Shouldn’t I be the one sayingthat?” he jokes shakily. His breath is shaky like he’s about to cry. It’s so rarefor him to cry.
“Don’t shed any tears for me,” she tells him. She wants tosit up, hold him, but any movement is too painful for her. “I’m alright, aren’tI? We’re both alright, so it’s going to be fine.”
“You’re right,” he mutters, and that’s when she knowssomething is wrong. He’s usually skeptical whenever she tells him not to worryor that everything would turn out okay, but now he can’t even look her in theeye. “You should rest more, Pieck. You were wounded badly.”
She wants to go back to sleep. Her eyelids feel heavy and she’sexhausted just from keeping them open, but the tone in his voice concerns her. Itfeels like he’s hiding something.
Pieck struggles to sit up, ignoring Porco’s requests for herto remain lying down. It’s only after she sits up and blinks that she realizesthat she’s not in a hospital or resting in her room. The room is unfamiliar toher and is nothing like a room at all. It’s a jail cell, she realizes, barrenexcept for the bed and the chair. The dim light outside of the cell is the onlything illuminating the chamber.
It’s only then that she remembers the battle that had happenedright before she woke up. There were flashes from bombs and guns, enemysoldiers flying through the air, and buildings that were crumbling. People werescreaming, fleeing, dying, and she was fighting alongside Porco and Zeke toprotect the Warhammer Titan from Paradis. And the Panzer squad, on her back, hiddenbeneath her armor and yet still slaughtered because she couldn’t protect them. A familiar man came to her, a coldexpression on his face as he came in for the kill.
“Where’s the Panzer squad?” Tears stream down her face andshe looks at Pokko, afraid of the answer she’ll receive from him. He onlyshakes his head, refusing to look at her. She knows she won’t get any answersfrom him and yet the questions spill from her mouth anyway. “Where’s Zeke?Where are we? What’s happening?”
He wants to give her the answers, she knows by the way helooks at her with his helpless eyes and silent frown, but all he can do is holdher close and stay with her as they wait for their unknown fate.
