#polish students

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091017 // Hamburg - Café Sul

[maga-trains-oow]

Enhance Your Negative Working With Assignment Staff

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[viridiansunlight]

Before I go to bed, I shall unveil to you the secret of getting ridiculously drunk

Warning: Not to the people with low alcohol tolerance.

Disclaimer: I do not endorse underage drinking. If you are a minor, scroll the heck down.

Polish students will know what I am talking about.

So, the thing is, that the first rule to survive any party with booze is

DO NOT MIX TYPES OF ALCOHOL.

Of course, there are permutations to it, like, if you start with beer you can drink vodka afterwards, but not the other way around, but I digress.

So, the main point of this method? Mix all of them. ALL OF THEM.

We call it the CAULDRON OF PANORAMIX

What you need:

0,7 liter vodka, preferably something good, like Absolut or Finlandia, or, if you want to make Viri proud, Soplica or Wyborowa vodka brands.

1 bottle of cheapass bubble wine. We use the so called "Russian champagne" which is neither made in Russia, nor is it a champagne, but it costs literally 2$ and is really good. If you are so blessed to be able to buy it, invest in Igristoye. If not, any cheapass champagne will do. If you don't have it, use white wine.

4 cans of the strongest beer you can find. Here in Poland, the strongest beer is (at least to my knowledge) Czarny Książ (which translates as Black Prins I guess). It has literally 9,5% of alcohol. You would probably get drunk after one, and I wouldn't be even surprised. You may have lesser beers, which are fine too. Not everyone can be so blessed.

1 small bottle of syrup. Like, the one you water down to have drinks or use for icecreams or whatever you do with it. It should be rasberry or orange flavored, but some tastes may be ok too.

1 gallon (or about 5 liters) cauldron (well, pot really) in which you mix it all with a ladle

This music

You totally need to channel druid Panoramix for it to be successful.

Mix all of the liquid ingredients to the rhythm of this music in the pot, then, with a ladle, pour it to the glasses (not shot glasses. large glasses, preferably those for whisky) or bowls, if you want to channel Panoramix and the Gauls more.

What is guaranteed: that you will get drunk fast, and if you know your limits, you will be a happy drunk. The syrup masks the worst of the booze flavour, so it gets down easier.

What is also guaranteed: the next day you WILL have a hangover, unless you would hydrate yourself generously before you go to bed (which may be hard to remember about. You know, because you are shit-faced).