#prayfordave

[gossiplolly-blog]

Prayer is the answer. God loves a grafter!! 🙏 Facebook. 🍭

[ded-eyedave-blog]

On way to Lions Den... R.I.P. Should be called "Ded-Lung Dave" 😂😂😂 #lionsden #prayfordave #preyforme #gym #killmenow #nostream #gymfail

[davesdaughter92]

Believing in Something More

Over the last three weeks, my life has changed. My family's lives have changed. Time has stood still but also has slipped away. Doesn't really make sense does it? I feel like things haven't made much sense lately. Right now I feel like I can watch the scariest of all movies and it wouldn't even scratch the surface of how fearful I have been the last three weeks. Dad has been sick. He's been sick for seven years, each day slowly deteriorating his memory. More and more of him goes, over time. But he got sicker. And he physically started deteriorating. It's different because you can see it. His illness now is measured by numbers and other scientific measures where before he had his good days and bad days. I've watched him for weeks struggle to breathe and to fight for his life. I've watched him battle his demons and fears to try to stay with us. I've watched. And nothing hurts more than watching and not being able to do a damn thing about it. I am a person of science. Science and the human body is what I understand. Science does not lie and science does not reason. It is what it is. It is what I have always loved about it: finding the solution to the problem. I live by science. But science is failing me. Numbers don't lie. And dad's numbers are not good. His condition hasn't been getting better. And I'm struggling with what is happening and what I know and what I want to happen. What I need to happen. What I need is my dad. I need my dad here because I haven't had enough time. 25 years isn't enough. A lifetime couldn't be enough. My heart breaks everyday knowing it could be one less day that I will have with him. The man he has become versus the man he was before he got sick..doesn't matter. I will take him anyway I can have him: 1000 pounds or a bag of bones. Lucid or not. I need him here because he's the most important person in the world to me. When I look at the man lying in the hospital bed, my heart breaks. These people that are caring for him there didn't know the lively man he once was. The man that would do anything and everything for his family. The man who worked himself to the bone and never once complained. The man that showed up to every softball game, every piano recital, and every art show. The man that loved his wife and kids endlessly and never forgot to show it. The man that provided for his family and the man that was the best dad I could have ever dreamed of having. The man I see in that bed is a shell of the man that once was my dad, but dad is still in there. He fights everyday because that's just dad. He's a fighter. I am a believer in science. But I am a believer in people. And there's no one I believe more in than the man that has always believed in me. I believe Dad can beat this and that he will get better. I have to believe that. And sometimes when logic and science fail you, you have to believe in something more. I stopped practicing Catholicism seven years ago after dad got sick. It wasn't fair and I thought God had cheated us. I don't know why he got sick. And I don't care. But I have set my views on religion aside. I've never prayed more in my life than I have in the last three weeks. Praying to a God or Gods or the universe or whoever is listening out there to get my family through this and to give dad the strength to keep fighting. I'm praying for my dad. And I ask for you to believe in something more with me too. Pray for my dad because he's not ready to go yet. I'm not ready for him to go.

[comeonandrockmetosea-blog]

I don't know how to handle this much pain and loss and sadness at once. It's hitting me like a tsunami after a 7.5 earthquake. I can't believe that you're gone, and I don't even get to go to your funeral tomorrow because the school won't excuse me. You mattered so much to so many people. We'll miss you, Jake.