◊ ♫ ◊— look what the cat dragged in! that’s SONATA LEMAITRE and THEY are an around 24-year-old CASUAL VISITOR to the store, but they’ve been in the neighborhood for 2 YEARS. I think they are a CLASSICAL MUSICIAN, BARISTA AT BEAN BREW and I overheard them listening to THE BALLET OF THE RED SHOES by BRIAN EASDALE, and, I dunno man, it seemed pretty fitting. Like, call me shallow but I look at them and think of QUINTESSA SWINDELL and { stained glass windows, snuggling in an oversized sweater, the smell of honey, constantly carrying around sheet music. }
Hi hi! I go by Toon. You can message me on tumblr for plots as I decide if I want to be part of the discord (i! am! shy!). I get if you skipped straight to the bio/wanted connections. I’d never know! I rec read more on dash with xkit as this is a lot of text for my wee blog to handle right now (to be fixed later)
Some Basics About Sonata
Ballet of The Red Shoes: From a 1948 ballet drama film. Quick Summary a ballerina must choose between her career (constantly pushed upon her by her boss) and her romance with a composer. The story tackles both “art versus life” and “work versus love”. Sonata’s life has always been about work and art over life and love, and as the weight of those choices grows heavier, Sonata is starting to want to push back on the confides of classical music by finding and expressing their own individual creativity, sense of self, and desire to experiment.
Sexuality: Pansexual
Personality: Sonata is currently struggling with being stiff, as in: all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. They aren’t a rule breaker despite maybe wanting to be, but will make silly decisions to prove someone wrong. They can be a little too responsible, but they are desperately trying to come out of that. Their family has a rich history in classical music and they can be a bit snobbish about their interests though not on purpose.
Likes: Good music, warm drinks, sunny afternoons, waking up really early so they have some time to themselves, showering right before bed, inside jokes, watching ballet, impromptu ABBA dance parties, good film scores, light white wines.
Dislikes: Excessive use of foul language, laziness, messy common spaces, nosiness, crowds, drinking a lot (is a lightweight), being challenged or undermined
A BRIEF HISTORY (to....be.....redacted if necessary)
Sonata was born to Augustin Lemaitre and Twyla Ward. Their father is an acclaimed composer and classical musician and their mother is a retired (due to injury, and later motherhood) ballerina (their parents met when Augustin was playing in the French orchestra of one of Twyla’s performances).
Sonata was born in France and lived there until the age of five before their family moved to New York, where they lived five more years. Upon their parents’ divorce, Sonata lived with their father outside of New York who was financially better fit to have primary custody of them (for later reasons I will elaborate on...when I have....thought of them).
After university Sonata moved back to New York around two years ago, and has recently gotten back in touch with their mother though unbeknownst to Augustin. Their goal was to more to NY to eventually secure a seat at an acclaimed orchestra without feeling like their father pulled strings (haha, pun). Sonata loves their dad, but deep down feels overworked and cumbersome amounts of expectation.
They have an incredibly close relationship with their father, though they struggle sometimes to decide what it is they want versus what they think they need to want to please those around them. At what point did their life goal truly become their own? Sonata is really just.....trying to catch a thrill....
Sonata is the type to cry mid Opera.
Sonata’s dad sends them money every month to help with expenses (they are spoiled) but they work and share an apartment with a roommate, either saving the money up in case they wake up one morning with a backbone, or giving some to their mother behind their father’s back. Oh no!
Sonata has a six year old white Persian cat named Bowie. They would die for this cat.
They specialize in string instruments, most specifically violin (primary) and double bass.
WANTED CONNECTIONS
The Roommate: Sonata lives in a two bedroom apt in Brooklyn. Knowing them, this apartment is pretty big and would be expensive for large bedrooms, a washer/dryer, and nice open kitchen layout. Looking for someone (gender not important!) where they would be close friends due to sharing space, and have bonded over the last two years. Most likely one of their best friends in the city! Must be cool with constant practicing and few guests!
The Regular: Sonata works as a barista part time at Bean Brew. This could be someone who comes in often and they’ve talked and what have you! Sonata will know their order perfectly (please tell me) and they may even be sort of friends!
The Jam Buddy: Sonata prefers to practice alone, but finding a like minded person in NY who loves music like they do? Iconic. They would practice or just sit and work on their own studying/sheet music/etc; would be cool cool cool. If this person is someone who could get Sonata out of their shell, I dare you.
The Book Club Inside Joke: Sonata tried a book club once in Manhattan. They hated it. Went three times. Made a friend by quietly eye-rolling and joking about things. Both quit together, and now they hang! One of those friends you don’t know a lot about but want to/still get hype when you run into each other.
After Morphine, Mizuki becomes mentally unstable. He develops PTSD, paranoia, and depression, and while he never tells anyone, it doesn't take long for Koujaku to notice the symptoms and help him out. This brings the two closer, too close, to the point where Mizuki avoids Koujaku so he wot fall for him even more. What does Koujaku do (assuming he develops those same feelings)?
IM SO SORRY I SAID I WAS GONNA PUT NSFW BUT it fucking sucked so I took all of it out . Don’t worry if you saw it you would thank me. I’m running on like 4 hours of sleep here and I have no idea what pronouns and past tense and present tense verbs are. Hopefully it is understandable and not complete gibberish like how i feel like i wrote it. i did kinda give up on the end i didnt know what else to put
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
“Mizuki.” Koujaku held his hand firmly in place on theinside of the door, stopping it from closing in his face.
“….” Mizukikept his eyes on the ground beneath him, not daring to lift his eyes to meetKoujaku’s.
“Why have youbeen avoiding me lately?” Koujaku tried to pull the door back slowly, butMizuki kept his hold on the other side, “Is it something I’ve done?”
Koujaku wasgenuinely confused. He and Mizuki had grown closer than ever after the eventsof Oval Tower and Morphine; or so he thought. Soon after the events that tookplace, Mizuki was admitted to Midorijima General Hospital where he stayed in acoma for a couple of weeks. After waking, Koujaku noticed a change in hisfriend. Mizuki seemed distant. He was normally a cheerful, loud-mouthed ribsterwho had this attractive aura surrounding him along with his gang that was prettymuch his family. But after being discharged, Mizuki had pulled himself awayfrom society. The Black Needle seemed to be closed more and more often, andsoon after, Mizuki could hardly ever be found hanging around Dry Juiceterritory. No one in his team knew what was going on with him. Koujaku couldn’tstand to watch his friend deteriorate any further and took it upon himself to checkon him. When Koujaku found Mizuki, he was not in the best of states by a longshot.
From then on, Koujaku promised to help Mizuki. Hepromised him that he would be there for him, and so would his team. Koujaku shouldhave known better that he wouldn’t befine as soon as he left the hospital and to some extent, he felt that he was toblame.
Koujaku helped Mizuki back on his feet through smallsteps. There were many nights of staying at each other’s homes, many days ofstaying pent up inside the house never seeing the light of day, and manymoments of complete silence that filled the air between them that seemed holdup their progress together. Through all of the days they spent together,Koujaku was eventually able to break down some of the walls that Mizuki hadbuilt around himself. Over time, Mizuki began to open up more and smile like heused to. He returned to his normal self and Koujaku was relieved to see the grinreturn on his old friend’s face. He loved his smile. He loved his laugh.Koujaku hadn’t realized how much he’d missed it….
And that is why Koujaku was so confused now. The pastcouple of days, Mizuki seemed to be isolating himself. His responses becameshort and mumbled. Koujaku brushed it off at first, thinking he was just havinga bad day. But that one bad day turned into a bad week and the days began toadd up. Mizuki was getting worse as the days went on and Koujaku couldn’tfigure out why. Today, he decided to confront him.
”Well?” Koujaku stopped pulling on the door andstood there waiting on Mizuki’s response.
”…Just leave. It’s nothing.”
”It’s obviously something, Mizuki. Just tell me. IfI did something to upset you, all you have to do is-“
”I said it’s nothing! Leave!” Mizuki snapped atKoujaku and he glared at him through the crack in the door. Mizuki hadn’t meantto snap, it just happened on its own. It surprised even himself but for somereason he wasn’t able to show it.
Koujaku looked back into Mizuki’s emerald eyes. He heldhis gaze for a few seconds before finally sighing, “Jeez. Nothing, huh?”He pushed the door open without so much as a strain and stepped into hisapartment.
”Tch! Get out,” Mizuki growled at him, “Idon’t need you here anymore.”
”And why is that all of a sudden?” Koujakuclosed the door behind him and crossed his arms.
”I just don’t need you here anymore!” Mizukiclenched his fists as his voice grew louder in volume.
Koujaku took a small glance at the smaller man’s clenchedfists and looked back to him, “Mizuki-“
”You’re just so close to me! It’s suffocating, whywon’t you just go!” All of these words flying out of his mouth weren’ttrue, but for some reason he couldn’t stop them from spilling out. He enjoyedhaving Koujaku around. Hell, he’d even say he loved having him around. Howeverthis feeling deep within him kept telling him to let Koujaku go. But why? Ifthey were so close, why did he feel the need to shut Koujaku out again?
”Is that it?” Koujaku said.
”Ngh..” Mizuki brought his hands up to his faceand rubbed his eyes, “No…that’s not what..” a headache wasbeginning to form and emotions swelled within him. He couldn’t place exactlywhat he felt. None of this was Koujaku’s fault. “I just…”
Koujaku sighed again and took a step back, “Iunderstand. I’m sorry for intruding so much. If you ever need anything justgive me a call.” Koujaku thought it best to give Mizuki some space for thetime being. He didn’t want to push him any further than he already had.
Koujaku turned to leave when he felt a hand wrap aroundhis arm.
”No! Koujaku don’t go. I just…I’m,” Mizukifumbled with his words. He was frustrated and he couldn’t find the right way todescribe how he was feeling, “I need you here. I-” His voice quiveredand he closed his eyes, “You’re just so close to me. You’ve always beenthere for me. And..and I..I’ve fallen for you.” Mizuki dropped his handsto his sides. “I shouldn’t have fallen for you. I didn’t mean to. You’vealways been here…this isn’t right I know. Just because you’ve beenhere…” Mizuki trailed off and looked away.
Koujaku stared at the other man wide-eyed. Fallen..forhim? He didn’t mean…By the look in his eyes, Mizuki had been feelingsomething for a long time, and maybe now he had only just come to realize it. Koujakuthought to himself about all of the times he had been with Mizuki. When hefirst saw him again, he had looked so miserable. Back then, something inKoujaku couldn’t be truly happy until he saw the familiar smug grin appear onMizuki’s face. He had missed that smile. He had missed that loud, boisterouslaughter. But above all, he had missed Mizuki.
”Mizuki I..” He searched for the right wordsbut nothing came to mind. He could see Mizuki turning away from him and hereached out and took the other man into his arms.
Mizuki gasped at the sudden movement but then he foundhimself pressed against Koujaku’s chest. He couldn’t fight against him anylonger. He didn’t even know why he fought against him in the first place. Helet himself sink into his hold. He couldn’t tell if this was Koujaku acceptinghim or consoling him until he rejected him but he didn’t care anymore. He hadbeen holding his feelings back for so long and now with their release, he wastired.
”I…I can still be there for you if you letme,” was all Koujaku managed to say in that moment.
Mizuki pulled out of Koujaku’s embrace and met his eyes. Itwas then that Koujaku leaned in and pressed a kiss to his lips. Mizuki closedhis eyes and indulged in the kiss. It was sweet, and tasted a bit ashy like thecigarettes he smoked. Koujaku pulled away and began to let go of himcompletely. Mizuki grabbed his kimono and pulled him back to his lips. Theyconnected again and Koujaku gasped in surprise.
”Mnnn…” Mizuki lightly moaned into the kiss.
”Mn..Mizuki….”
”Hnn..” Mizuki pushed his tongue throughKoujaku’s lips.
”Mizuki. Wait..” Koujaku pulled away from himto look into his eyes. What he saw was a burning desire. Had he really feltthis way about him for this long? “Are you sure about all this?”
”….” Mizuki swallowed and only stared.
”Maybe we should stop.”
”Koujaku. I want you.”
”H-hm?”
”You’ve been there for me when I needed you. I’msure about how I feel about you.”
Koujaku looked at Mizuki again before pressing anotherkiss to his lips.
Mizuki seemed hungry for his kisses. His tongueravenously swirled around his mouth and slipped over his own tongue.
”Mnnnnn. Ahh. Hng.” Koujaku reached behind himand turned the lock on the door.
”Aah. Nnn.” Mizuki pulled at Koujaku’s clothingand directed him towards the bedroom.
They never once broke contact as they made it to the bed.Koujaku pushed Mizuki onto the sheets and pressed more sloppy kisses onto hisface. Their kisses were rushed; it was like they couldn’t enough of the tasteof one another. Koujaku dropped his head and placed a kiss along Mizuki’sjaw-line and made his way to the bandages covering his neck.
”..Mizuki…” Koujaku nibbled at the bandages andplaced kisses along his neck where his tattoo used to be. Small slivers ofblack and pink ink could be seen through the unraveling tape.
”Nnn…not there Koujaku.” Mizuki led his headback to his lips and pressed them to his. He slid his tongue back into his mouth.Skin pressed against skin and heat swapped with heat as they melted into a poolof desire and pleasure.
Mizuki was certain of what he wanted and Koujaku wasconfident that he would be able to continue to be there for him. He wouldalways be there for him no matter how tough things may get. Their relationshipmay have moved to the next level but both were sure that this was what theywanted.
Nothing has changed after I knew a fragment of you. You're still the apple of my eye and the star I always wished for to come down. You may not be the richest, the best looking nor the smartest; but you are YOU for me, and I will love you without the labels. Just let me inside your galaxy and I will cherish every star, every planet and every heavenly body .
I will still love you even if it takes years for you to notice me. For now, I will be air — an invisible lover and I will never leave you. I will still write to you even if it takes centuries for you to write back, for I know love is selfless. I will gaze upon you in the heavens above for you are a star and I am merely a stargazer. I will constantly wait for you to fall down; I'll be at the bottom to catch you.
Ready for one of my midnight rants? I’m on this bed tossing and turning, fixing to find a comfortable position so I can proceed the night with a soft slumber. It’s not happening. My bed feels hard and my body is so sore. I’m always working out and trying new things that my muscles are always at work. I honestly dont remember what normal feels like. I’ve been telling myself that I’ll flip my bed “tomorrow” for months now. Still have yet to flip this damn bed. Tomorrow I will clean my room. Do laundry. Throw my sheets in the wash, too. FLIP my bed. Hopefully I’ll have a better sleep tomorrow night. Xx
