Now, It’s Not the Secret To Life...But..
So, I’ve been typing this thing in like Word for weeks, and then I keep deleting it and never really publishing it. I had a talk with my Uncle like a month ago, and it really changed my perspective on life. Like, this is my really cool uncle. Has a great ass job, his kids are showered with all the gifts, he has a beautiful home and a great kickass wife who takes shit from no one and they’re all living really like the dream life. I don’t want to divulge too much, ‘kuz it’s family y’know? But, dream life. Like just imagine.
I visit him like twice a year and this time around we started off with really light banter about me in college, and how’s my boyfriend, how’s school coming along? And when it became apparent that I hadn’t really thought out my life plan much and that I had no idea what I was doing, and that I was actually super insecure, he like just started...talking. He told me, how lucky he was. Like, really lucky. His job is nowhere near his major. Like, it’s a completely different discipline! He was mediocre in college. And like I can’t really put into words what we talked about. We talked for like 3 hours. But, I’m just gonna try to bullet point or ramble about what he said??
Change. Accept it, embrace it. Like, it’s a fucking compliment. If someone tells you you changed, and they mean it in a bad way, don’t take it like that. We’re all evolving especially in this weird young adult phase. He kept reiterating how I wasn’t even 21 yet. Like 21 is not an end goal. It’s the beginning of the most formative years that’ll shape who you are as an adult. He said adulthood doesn’t really settle till you’re at least 30. LIke 20-30 is really the age where you want to do stuff. You /want/ to change. He was talking about how he was scared for his children growing up in SoCal because we have two extremes. Those upper middle class children who kinda just streak by in life ‘kuz they can depend on their parents and those who come from bad backgrounds but definitely see the glass ceiling and stop themselves. He spoke of where he went to college and hearing of these people not settling for being successful but like being worldchanging and taking steps to be a worldchanger really changed him, and changed the way that he worked in life. Be a worldchanger, break that motherfucking glass ceiling.
People. We may all be in love now, not in love at all, in love with our friends, in love with our neighbors, loving all the people around us, or we may be thinking of tying the knot. But think of teams. You could be a star player, but on a shitty team you can’t do anything. You think you’re being polite by not calling out this shitty person on their stuff, but if they’re on your team (friend/lover/neighbor) they’re gonna bring you down. Taking into account all their background and their attitudes, like if they’re not helping you then you don’t need them. Don’t let you being polite detriment your ability to move forward. If you’ve got a shitty lover, and you’re afraid of dumping them--don’t be. If you’ve got shitty friends who just are kinda like a cancer--kill that mother fucker and get out of there (please not for real, like kill the cancer not the person, just get them out of your life) Don’t let the people around you keep you from succeeding.
Interviews. Those are the dealbreakers. Like, his resume wasn’t all that great. It wouldn’t be coming straight out of college. Kill those interviews. Take advantage of the Career Center while you’re there. He was telling me how he got to his current job by interviewing to a company from the Career Center at his college and they eventually referred him to where he is now. He also said that it was kinda like the companies in the Career Center are somewhat obligated to at least put you through one interview. Problem solve, kill those interview questions. Those are what really put you into the job.
WHY? As like the bosshead of this company or whatever he does, he knows workers. He labeled them as, What, How, and Why workers. ‘What’ workers are the workers who say, “What needs to be done. Tell me what to do.” They just work, don’t think for themselves. “How” Workers are the ones who say, “This is what we are doing. How are we going to do it? How am /I/ going to do this?”. “Why” workers are at the top. They are the ones who question, “Why the heck are we doing this? Why does this bring benefit to our company” etc. Always, always ask why.
Narrow. (<--that doesn’t make sense but I’ve been doing these one worded thingies..) DON’T narrow yourself. He took me as an example--I like to teach people. I taught dance at my studio, I taught English in Taiwan, I mentored people in Church, I’ve mentored at my school, and I’ve liked being the senpai to people and teaching them what to do next. So, I decided I”d be a kickass teacher. Like, c’mon, I’ve gotten awards for teaching so on and so forth I’d be great at this! But then he kinda clarified it for me. Do I like teaching? Or do I like teaching people Education? Like, I’d decided to be a teacher but I hadn’t decided on what material to teach. I’ve just liked teaching. But then he asked me that and when I barely waited to say I like teaching (cutting him off midword) he said why not teach in a business? Or other things? He said basically a managerial position is to teach your helper bees how to work. I could be a counselor I could be a lot more than just a teacher. IF I really wanted to be a teacher I could still go for it, but like there are other ways of teaching.
And so yeah. I mean I haven’t been able to do anything yet but I just felt like I should share with Tumblr how this kinda changed my outlook on things. Like hey, if you’re just coming out of college, or going into your last few years like, don’t be afraid. Take advantage of what we have right now in school, and then try to keep going forward with that. Keep the stuff you love as a hobby. Keep the stuff you enjoy and tolerate in mind as stuff you could do for a career. But, if you wanna do it the other way, go for it. Like, I feel like life hasn’t begun yet. Maybe I only feel this way because I’ve been blessed by whatever deity that I am in the position I am now, and maybe for others they’ve already started this life process but like for those who are just kinda floundering around I feel like these words can at least calm you down like they did me.