#purposethroughpain

[advicefromjulieandspice]

Pain can feel unbearable — but it can shape you, not break you. After losing Spice, I’ve learned to walk through grief and use it to inspire and heal others — carrying on her legacy.

📝 Read the full story that inspired this video on my blog → https://advicefromjulieandspice.com/pushing-through-pain-to-find-purpose-a-lesson-from-spice/

🎥 Watch the Short (with sound) → https://youtube.com/shorts/-nqcsxd5q_E?feature=share

[marchforthmediacompany]

Using art to escape from pain - meet author, actress, poet Nina Ruiz on the blog today. --> https://bit.ly/3itacz9 Nina shares a message of hope and strength, reminding us that it is possible to channel our pain into a creative force for good.

[isebeasmara]

Day 3 to fulfillment

People react to stress differently. Some people lose themselves in relationships and tend to retreat to using space as an opportunity to get back in touch with who they truly are. For me, space has always been about using that time to be completely alone and to hear God, to write, to be still, to enjoy the outdoors and in result the mirrors inside of me are cleared of all fogginess. I feel like a great amount of wisdom gets bestowed onto me and I am supposed to do something with it. Everything gets clearer. This is a feeling I get obsessed with when I get space because I fall in love with who I am and who created me ALL OVER AGAIN. (It sucks that this gets lost whenever I become devoted to someone else. I hope to learn this balancing act of loving freely and cherishing the moments to remain and to grow my true self.)  However, just because I revert to introverted ways of getting back to the core of I who I am, doesn’t mean everyone uses space in that way. Women and men are very different when it comes to space and stress.

What I learned today:

For men: Sometimes it’s more beneficial to escape from feelings than it is to try and sort through them. They tend to fully immerse themselves in something else when they ask for space. What that “something else” is, depends on the man but it is their way of getting back to who they truly are. 

Men pried themselves on being able to solve issues on their own and feel extremely unsettled when problems emerge. Taking space is a natural coping mechanism for most men when they are under stress in “a relationship” just as seeking support from friends and loved ones is a natural coping mechanism for most women. 

Tough Realization: Men become more self-centered and less empathetic when they are stressed out. Women however, react in the opposite way, being able to distinguish their own emotions and intentions from those of other people. 

Giving space and not forcing him to talk about it is important because men need to feel like they are in charge of their lives, like they are capable of solving whatever comes up. Let him reach a solution on his own because when you try to do it for him, he will get the message that you don't trust that he’ll be able to figure it out on his own and it'll make him feel worse. If you get angry or frustrated with him, he will see you as a source of stress in his life and it will put more strain on the relationship. 

It’s hard to grasp because as women we feel like talking about what stresses us out helps us to cope with it. When men shut us out, we tend to feel not cared about, rejected or that he doesn't feel close to us which could cause us to resent him and magnify the issues that already exist. However, if he pulls back he isn't shutting you out - it’s just his process to recover. He’ll feel better when he has a handle on whatever it is that is going on. Be patient and know that God can only control the outcome at this point.