#pyro plays dnd

[pyrocortex]

A Teifling, an Orc, and a Tabaxi walk into the Elven Capital.

thing i actually said after our party completed our first road trip

[bansheecarol]

yknow that part in monster factory fallout 4 where it's like "this woman fucking hates this cursor" that's basically misha @adhd-insomniac 's player character @ a hapless intern npc and I haven't stopped laughing for years

[pyrocortex]

my personal d&d highlight for the night

Context: our characters where talking and laying out our backstories.

Orc(OoC): What race are you?

Rogue: Tiefling.

Orc @me: And What race where you again?

Me: Tabaxi

Orc: An Orc, A Tabaxi and a Tiefling. we can't go anywhere without getting shit.

Me: But we can walk into an incredible number of bars.

[pyrocortex]

pyro plays d&d day 3

The group is finally altogether and i, the monk, finally got to punch something, also there was a talking switchblade that sang "what do you do with a drunken sailor'

[pyrocortex]

First dnd game: everything is chaos and we haven't even started yet

[pyrocortex]

Pyro plays d&d day 5:

Finally left the desert island. Everyone shared their backstories. The paladin pranked the acholic cleric by casting 'purify food and drink' on his sour brooze mid swig. Then we played a card game where the winner could basically force a dare on any other player. The useless bard won first so we had to listen to a bad recorder version of the pirates of the caribbean theme. I won the second game so the racist paladin had to go on a date with the half-orc.

Then our ship started sinking but we're saved by ship full of skeleton pirates. Also presumably a necromancer.

We also spent twenty minutes debating who should be the captain. Which went completely​ off the rails where somebody suggested anarcho-communism because the dm kept on insisting on asking sensible questions like "but who's in charge if we get boarded and there isn't time for a vote". The useless bard is now the captain, and I voted for him.

[pyrocortex]

Nat 20! Sports!

Our Sorcerer, immediately before inventing Owlbear Rugby.

[pyrocortex]

uni d&d game day two

Half the people didn't show up and the main plot couldn't advance so my character got his recent memories removed and dumped on a island.

The paladin is a speciesist jackass, the bard played the recorder version of my heart will go on, the level 1 wizard is also mother nature and caused a storm so powerful that it shipwrecked everyone, and we started a coconut cult.

I love d&d