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Dear ignorant mom from the store; three things...
If you're gonna look at me funny and point in my direction, be a little more discrete about it.
Tell your shitty little gremlin kid to do the same.
My mom has been braiding my damn hair and buying me makeup since I was 10 years old. So in response to "God, I wonder what his poor mother must think"...
She'd think you're a nasty, judgmental cunt.
So I suppose this is supposed to be my introduction, yeah? Well, I'm Lavender. I've never done anything like this so bare with me. I enjoy reading and dancing in my room, even though I can't dance to save my life. Is there anything else I should say?
Okay, it's so time I do an intro. I know we're all waiting for it. I'm Charlotte, but please do not call me that. I can cry on command. Don't make me cry. Lola's the game, flawless is the game. I'm doing a course in theatre costume design, I'm twenty one, and I'm mainly on here because ladies. Hi.
Well fuck, are these introductions mandatory? Because I've always loathed explaining myself to people. But here goes nothing I guess--I'm Mia, screenwriter in progress, waitress at the local diner, and incredibly bad at making good impressions.
I almost tripped up the stairs today, aren't I special?
I always feel so personally offended when my favourite contestants get voted out of reality tv shows. Like bitch, I feel like you just came for me and my taste in some sorta way...
I never thought 3 words could make me cry like that. Especially not when they're 'we are groot.'