Been feeling like I've abandoned my decks and my practice so I decided to do a simple casual reading with my Alleman's Tarot
Question: What do you want to tell me?
Cards: No set number, ended up being three
Masks - things being different externally and internally. You may dress up to as a part, but it is out if habit more than passion. Who are you performing for? What lies have you turned into habits?
Falling on one's own sword might be dramatic, but you certainly prick yourself with your own dafgers. Self doubt, overwhelm, anxiety. You feel a need to hide and make yourself small, but the call is coming from inside the house.
Card 3: The Hermit, Reversed
A reverse of the good of the Hermit - isolation without reason, pointless self-imposed exile. You may blame something else, but it's your own self keeping you away and distant.
Well then. I feel almost a little bit attacked, to be honest 😂
Guess in a nutshell the deck is telling me I'm too hard on myself, too scared to open up and self isolating and putting on a happy face in an attempt to lie to myself about what I want and why. I need to be kinder and more truthful to myself, and open up to the people around me.
I thought I had been doing that. But I guess I'm really not, huh?