#ranting it up

[logicroute]

its a fairly well-known thing that nankidai designs the hallucinations in a way that mirrors how it 'started' (in quotes), at least to what i know. so :3 im going to talk about my personal thoughts on how they r designed and how nankidai plays around with it in sprite work! kinda short ramble and this is just. my basic thoughts compressed due to my fear of being far too talky and going in circles

(rant undercut!)

the ones that are red/black stem from guilt, believing you are at fault for what happened to them (usually death!) ie the hallujoe and mr policeman + the ones seen in ytts. using a base sprite and then coloring it with red + black leaning into the horror side of yttd, empty eyes a never ending grin.. you get the picture. its interesting how nankidai draws them... having all of them stem from the base idea of the hallucinations being a 'monster' of some kind.

compared to kannas 'kind' ones, seeming to keep the characters og colors but adding a white overlay. a fairly large contrast to the ones that seem to harm. playing into the idea of it being a 'ray of light' in a way (in kannas eyes at least). even if at first kanna felt like she was at fault for kugies death, she was able to realize that if she was alive.. kugie would want kanna to live. so she carries kugie and even shin with her.

andd then i get to shins (WHICH IS A HALLUCINATION!! I DONT CARE!). the shadow. shadsou. being pitch black instead of when it opens its mouth and the outline. unlike the other ones which have some sort of color, either being dark reds or light colors in general. compared to the other two which had an actual death tied to them, shadow comes from the 'death' of shin tsukimi, being how it convinces shin to go by sou. and like the other hallucinations, mocking shin but instead of it being about how its their fault for their death, its about how shin will die.

anyhow. in short. the way that yttd shows hallucinations is super interesting to me in a theming sense.. all of them stemming from the idea of someone dying.

i have soo many more thoughts abt this topic.. but this is good enough for now :3 feel free to ask any followup questions if you wish.. my ask box is always open! if this is messy. oops. i just got home and had to get my thoughts out.

[logicroute]

this is from my twt (follow me) but i'll put this here to

do you ever think about how even if shin knew that kanna got voted with the sacrifice card she wouldnt pick him, at that moment he didnt care about the chance of him dying even if it was the one thing he was fighting against, he just wanted to make sure that at least kanna is ok. the idea of shin being so willing to die for kanna makes me insane, even if he went to the lengths of faking his own identity to even get the smallest sliver of the idea of living. i hate greenblings. this isnt. all of my thoughts on them due to me having issues w/ wording at times but. bites wood a bit.

[logicroute]

do you ever think abot how shin and nao somewhat foil/mirror with eachother. both if them have no chance of survival (with shin having quite literally 0% chance of survival and nao only bejng brought in because of her ties to mishima .. as well has gashu rigging the cards). with both of them pretty much begging sara to vote for themself to protect another person (sara and kanna). also both of them wanting to live but they wouldn’t. be mad about dying if its to protect someone they care about. how both of them have slight themeing about how they wear clothes (nao having her apron to focus.. shin having his scarf as a protective thing, keeping his hiyori persona alive) is it just me.

[logicroute]

ppl will literally ignore maples character, her quite literal PROGRAMMED LOVE FOR HIYORI and somehow make it about shipping. like i love maple ships dont get me wrong(im literally the ceo of mapiley) but please. dont ignore . that she is still programmed to love hiyori, and the only reason why its like that is to make sure she doesnt kill him. she cant be fixed that easily, its in her code to do so. at most she can be 'fixed' by rewriting her code but.. would that make the other person any better than hiyori in the end?

[logicroute]

hades fun ramble abt how the yttd fandom treats shin tsukimi :)

haiiii so if you know me you know that i have one billion illness about some guy named shin tsukimi from yttd! and i have some issues on how the fandom writes him, this is coming from someone who has health issues so im going to be somewhat projecting but! hopefully not that much. all of it is going to be under cut!

this is going to cover a lot of spoilers.. so i wouldnt click it unless you finished the game. its also going to cover topics like ableism and a mention of toxic relationships but thats expected when you want to talk about shin and the fandom

so in game (epsically in your turn to shine) its heavily hinted that shin is someone who has health issues (chronic illness and the works), even in the base game it is shown that shin is physically weak (chapt one in the bar where he tries to open the drawer for example.).

and how the fandom made that into shin being a weak person, but not in a strength sense, in the sense that he cant protect/cant hold his own (looking at you shin ship writers.). but! thats just the only issue right? (this is also ableism to me in a way.. but i cant put my words right at the moment.)

nope!! theres more. the fandom at times made shin out to be a 'dirty' person, someone who is gross and unclean. even if that's far from canon (there being a line that shins hands are clean in game.) and to me, thats just stereotypes of people who are mentally ill coming into play. saying that people who suffer from mental illness cant treat themselves on their own. which in some cases may be true, but not in all of them.

i also think this ties into shin being a person who was in game he is saving money, he is a job hopper which some fans took as he is poor which mean hes dirty.. which is just gross that people think just because a person may be poor, automatically means they're dirty.

theres also the issue with shadow sou (also know as shadsou in the fandom) where (some) people treat it as not a part of shin, it just being a part of midori. shin didnt bring out the hiyori persona out of nowhere, it wouldnt make sense that shin is some 'soft boy'.

fans tend to forget that shin isnt the best person, even in a few pregame thoughts. he can still be an asshole without being told about the 0.0% thing. you can let him be petty, you can let him be sly, you can let him be mean. he doesnt need to be doomed to do any of that.

its the same with the shinai, we only really saw small bits of the shinai.. and guessing from his dialog, he is still close to hiyori and that can affect how he acts, but that doesnt mean a pre game shin acts just like shinai, his an ai for a reason, he learns over time and picks up his own traits. its similar to how the fandom treats highschool shin and his friendship with hiyori and thats a whole another can of worms.

people who say they dont ship hiyori and shin.. and then say they dated in the past are an issue to me. not every toxic friendship has to be romantic, yes hiyori wanted to study shin, but thats because he wanted to see how much he can push a person. even the shinai says he likes to experiment on people, and hiyori most likely did the same with shin but more in a mental sense.

theres a reason why i dont interact with people who tag stuff with their ship tag, i dont trust them to take them in a way thats just them being 'friends'. and if you see it like that or make it out so hiyori isnt that bad of a person... block me i dont want you guys near me. (this goes with those 'midori isnt a bad person!!' au writers to. get out.)

on the topic of shipping, a handful of people who ship shin with people srsly make him out to be someone whos weak and needs to be protected by whoever the pairing is with. you guys just want your yaoi. i see this the most in keishin / alishin circles. shin doesnt need to be 'saved' or whatever, he just needs to heal on his own time, he doesnt need a romantic partner in his life for that.

thats a good part of my thoughts! if you have any questions on my thoughts on shin you can send me an ask here or shoot me a dm on discord :3 (samuraiyaiba)

[kathryn-eliza96]

I am worth more than a number.

I am worth more than a number.

The number could be my weight. I am worth more than that. I am not that number on the scale no matter how much society likes to say that we need to look a certain way. i am learning to love myself. I am working on being who I am and what I want to be. I am worth more than that number that fluctuates daily.

The number could be my GPA. I am worth more than that. Why does my intelligence have to measured by that? Why do you need a statistic? Why don't we look at who I am and measure how big my heart is? My life and my worth is not defined by this number. 

I am worth more than this measly number. Why does college think that it is the most defining thing about me?  I just had a lecture on how when you are applying for a job they do not want to know your GPA. So why does it matter? If in the end game, the people who I am going to be working for do not care... Then why should I? 

Do the people running colleges and other programs such as high school remember how hard it was? Do they think that it just got easier? No they just forgot. They forgot what it was like to be young. 

Go pull your head out of your asses and realize this and then maybe 

Just maybe people will actually like learning.