#rantstuff

[thatreallyrandomchick]

So I guess my blog has been active for 12 years as of May 12th. 12 whole years just doesn't seem possible. Roughly 6 of those years have been dedicated to motherhood, which I wouldn't trade for the world. I went from my daughter being born in 2018, to adding a bonus daughter in 2021, a son born in 2022, and finally, my daughter who was born just 4 months ago. I also got married💍 on 06/17/2023, so this past year alone has been a pretty wild ride.

My husband has been my biggest supporter since the day we got together, and I'm so blessed to be a stay at home mom for our kiddos while he works. Is it difficult? Yes, some days more than others. Is it worth not having money for yourself? Without a doubt in my mind, yes. You can't buy happiness, but the smiles on my children's faces are absolutely worth the financial sacrifice I took in order to stay home with them. Do I want to go back to work? Someday, when my youngest two are in school... considering I have a 2 year old and a 4 month old, it'll be a few years. Which I'm more than okay with. 🩷

[thatreallyrandomchick]

Hey guys! I'm back finally! It's been a very busy time for me as of late. Being a mom of a toddler and expecting another child, on top of being a CNA, can take a lot out of a person.

[thatreallyrandomchick]

I'm sorry if I'm letting you down baby. I know you're up there watching over me and I can't help but think you're screaming at me about certain things. I haven't been making the best choices lately... I just wish I knew what I'm supposed to do without you. Every day without you has been hard for me. You were always the one who kept my sassy ass in line, the one who loved me unconditionally even though I was a brat to you... I really feel like I lost half of myself the day I lost you. I just wish you were still here with me and not in Heaven with your mom and everyone else. I miss you so much. I love you always TG ♡

[thatreallyrandomchick]

So I don't even know where to begin with this post. The man in the picture with me was my boyfriend. (Yes, that means Cyle and I broke up but I'll get to that later). This man's name was Teddy. I met him through my best friend/roommate, and I honestly think it was a little bit of fate that brought us together. I thought he was attractive from the moment I saw him, even though there was a bit of an age difference between us. He showed me what it was like to be spoiled, to be loved unconditionally, and how I was supposed to be treated. Unfortunately, my relationship with him was short lived. Not because he broke up with me or vice versa... it was because he passed away. I found him on our bedroom floor the night of the second (yes, February), and I haven't been the same since. We had to let him go on the 4th. I will never forget the relationship we had, or how special he made me feel. I honestly feel like I lost my other half. Being without him has turned me into more of a bitter person than I already was. TG, I miss you so much it hurts. I will always love you. Rest easy baby. Until we meet again ♡♡♡♡

[thatreallyrandomchick]

Well...

I did the one thing I swore I would never do, and I hurt someone who genuinely cared about me.  He didn’t deserve what I did to him, and honestly I regret what I did.  Instead of listening to him and discontinuing my contact with someone he didn’t like, I went behind his back and continued on.  He found out and he left me.  I know what I did was wrong, but there’s nothing I can do to go back and change it. 

Now, I’m single and I have no idea what to do with my life.  Everything is a jumbled mess that I created, and I have no idea how to even begin fixing it.  I guess I need to take things one day at a time, and I need to start healing my own broken heart.  Mine doesn’t even compare to his.... but regardless, his leaving me hurt me more than I ever thought it would. 

I can’t ever say I’m sorry enough... :(

[thatreallyrandomchick]

July 8, 2016

Well, since I haven't posted anything that's not a reblog... I figured I would. I have basically no time to scroll through my dashboard anymore since I started working at Walmart, but I do still look through it occasionally. I'm currently trying to sleep, but my body seems to have other plans. Fair warning; this could get to be a little too much information. On June 24, I had some abnormal cervical cells removed. I had a colposcopy done before that, and those results stated that I needed treatment. Now, I can't have intercourse until July 18, or somewhere after that. On top of that, Aunt Flo decided it was finally time to visit. Which also means I have cramps, and those are ruining my chances of sleep. There's more, but I'm not ready to post all of that. I'm ready for bed. Goodnight all.

[thatreallyrandomchick]

Hello everybody!

So the reason I haven't been posting much on here lately is because I got a new job... it's not in the field of study that I went to school for but it certainly pays more than the substituting job I had. Which means that I quit that one, but I was getting shafted on hours (which sucks if you take cabs everywhere). I'm a cashier now at Walmart (location will not be disclosed yet), and I actually kind of like it except for a few asshole coworkers. I think that happens anywhere you go though. Anyway, I'm still here... kind of, so I'll post when I can! :)

[thatreallyrandomchick]

I should be asleep right now... Fml. Hopefully my new job calls about orientation today though! :)