“WHY THE FUCK IS MY DAUGHTER CUSSIN’?!”

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“WHY THE FUCK IS MY DAUGHTER CUSSIN’?!”
( ;△ RANDOM TEXTS – accepting )
@eusyram said: beep 19. a bad idea text
TO: ALL CONTACTS FROM: RED
[ TXT ] : I have a craving for good flatbread and overthrowing the government, would anyone like to join me?
Flirty
continued with @devotionoftheocean from here - x
The comment earns a soft but audible squeak from the monster, their cheeks turning to a light shade of pink while their hair fluffs up slightly. It’s a sound that might be surprising to hear from a small powerhouse like them, but then again, it might not, they did have the tendency to look like a cinnamon roll. He thinks they’re hot, though! That’s quite a compliment.
They exhale, earfins fluttering. “Wow, wasn’t expecting that.” They chuckle, running their hand through their hair to smooth it. “Thank you, though. You’re pretty good-looking yourself, sugar bones.” The fish monster winks playfully at him, but their comment is completely sincere. He is pretty cute, to be honest! The cracks against the rims of his eye sockets aren’t a turn off, if anything it adds an air of mystery to him.
Red may or may not have been rather tipsy, and that may or may not have had a hand in how exactly he started this interaction with a new person. He grinned at the little squeak, some sort of victory in his pupils. That was adorable. They did manage to get ahold of themself easily enough, though, but that was okay. Then he got a compliment back, and he flushed a little.
“aw, this old mug? pssh. thanks, tho. so what can i call ya in bed?”
There was a very slight possibility he was more than tipsy.
Slim your answer to that last question is quite alarming I must ask, what's the story behind that one?
Slim: drank mself dumb @ muffetz after workn off m tab
Razz: WHICH WRACKED UP ANOTHER ONE. AND GOT HIM SLOSHED.
Slim: nxt morn derz an emergency idk but mlordz rushn round more n usual
Slim: idk wazzup but i no my headz killin me
Slim: cant damn well serve mlord like dat lol so i gotta snap outa it asap
Razz: SO THE DRUNK SNAPS HIS OWN LEG AND BRISTLES LIKE A WET CAT
Slim: insta sobriety lol
Slim: now wnevr i need a kick n da pantz i hike up good ol lefty n snap
Stretch: thats awful
Razz: IT IS ANNOYING
Red: daz fukn genius imma try dat
Lust: dont you dare
Where do babies come from, sir?
“ Amazon ships anything nowadays. ”
i am officially brain dead btw
this is why you don’t put all your loyalty in a criminal organization. you use it until it can’t get you anything then bounce.