#reicarnation

[djlechat]

[alessandrococcorullo]

Gong

[sporadicarbiterearthquake-blog]

Reincarnation and Grail Christianity

From Chapter Two 

"One of the most controversial, if not the most controversial, canons of Grail Christianity is its belief in reincarnation.  Yet a recent poll stated that an impressive 23% of US Christians expressed a belief in reincarnation...Two theological truths seem to stem most directly from that belief.  

On Grail Christianity [Blake, R Roy] on Amazon.com. *FREE* shipping on qualifying offers. On Grail Christianity

One is that the efforts of theological advocates come up with a perfect theology is fruitless, because it is impossible for humans to know the mind of God.  As God is also a loving God, he would not impose any theological or religious test as a condition of His Love...Believers in Christian reincarnation can, however, point to the Bible itself, especially the book of Matthew and Matthew 17....Other verses cited include Mark 9:13...Luke 1:17....Malachi 4:5, Mathew 11:11-15....1 Corinthians 15:35-45, Romans 5:14...John 1: 21-27....Revelations 3:12...Revelations 13:10....Galatians 6:7..... 

[xiellesky]

If I were to be reborn I want to become a snail or a slug, that way, I'd just crawl, eat, be a pest and die of saltiness because that's basically what I am rn

[deathworld-commando-reborn]

Ch.5- Reconciliation.

I slowly opened my eyes, expecting to see the deep expanse of the void. Instead, I was laying down staring up at a familiar ceiling. My body felt weak and tired, but that was a good thing I guess. That means I must have survived. And I could fulfill my promise.

My neck felt like it weighed double its normal amount as I managed to rotate it. Old man Jacobs was sitting in a chair pulled up to my bedside and was dozing off. But as soon I gazed in his direction, though it was only a moment, his eyes snapped open and we stared right at each other in silence. I could tell he hasn’t slept very much. His normal amount of bags had extra bags under those emerald eyes of his. I thought he looked ancient before, but he somehow managed to look even older now. Guess that was my fault as well.

“Finally awake, kid. That’s good,” Dr. Jacobs said softly. His usual demeanor was gone and replaced with a warmth that radiated from him.

I tried to speak but I only managed a weak moan.

“Relax, don’t push yourself. ”

Dr. Jacobs summoned a fist-sized ball of water and guided it towards my mouth, "Here you go, kid."

I eagerly awaited its bliss as it splashed into my mouth, the water coated my dry throat and it was even chilled a bit. But I needed more. I reopened my mouth, singing for another round and Dr. Jacobs obliged with a chuckle.

“Thank you… Doctor, you probably saved me too. I’m sorry,” I said sincerely.

“It’s fine. You got lucky I decided to go out there with your parents. You wouldn’t have survived without me. Poison from a Shadowling, broken bones galore, blood loss, and mana sickness to top it all of. You are a really lucky kid,” Reprimanded Dr. Jacobs.

“I’m sorry,” It was all I could say in this situation. I didn’t know what else to say.

This man had gone out there and risked himself to save me, for nothing. I couldn’t offer him anything else other than my sincerest apology. I owed him so much, he was my mentor and asked nothing of me in return. Dr. Jacobs spent countless hours teaching me about mana and magic, an education that was fit for the elite.

Additionally, he constantly healed my wounded and battered body regularly with barely any complaints. What could I even do for him? What did this man even need or want from a failure like me? But maybe… I could do this. No, I wanted to do this. Maybe it was selfish of me to want this but it's all I could think of.

“Hey… Dr. Jacobs. Can I maybe call you Grandpa. If that’s okay?” I asked.

My voice shook a bit more than I intended. I was expecting him to just laugh at me and say ‘For someone so smart you sure are stupid, boy’ or something along those lines. I didn't know why but I wanted to recognize him as family. At this point, he was far more than some mentor to me. His facial features softened even more. He gave me a warm smile that reached ear to ear.

“Sure, kid. If that’s what you want,” said my grandpa.

“Thank you, Grandpa. For everything, I really am sorry.”

I was a little surprised he was so willing to accept me. He didn't even ask why or anything. It made me happy that he was willing to accept me as family.

“Mmm. Don’t worry about it. Nobody could have known a Shadowling pack would come so close to us. The wards around the village are supposed to protect us. Normally we get an early warning. But this time, you being attacked was the early warning. It was completely random that so many monsters showed up, it’s incredibly rare,” Explained Grandpa.

I could only manage a small nod as he continued on, “But it’s fine. I guess in some twisted way you might have saved some people, kid. We have no idea how so many got past the rangers, hunters, and the village wards. Those monsters probably would have come after the village if they didn’t stumble upon you first.”

“Did anybody get hurt?” I asked.

“Nope. You were the only one who had anything serious. As soon as your parents knew you were going to be okay, they along with all the rangers and hunters went into the jungle for two whole days. They hunted every monster or dangerous animal all the way to the next damn village. I almost feel bad for anything that got caught up in their warpath…”

“And where are my parents now?” I asked nervously.

I had so much to say to them. My chest tightened as I thought about what I was going to say. I had made myself a promise. I was going to change, and I was going to be the best son I could be. But more importantly, I needed to tell them, no I had to tell my mom and dad that I loved them.

“They finally just went to sleep. You Elves don’t need to sleep as much as us Humans. But staying up for 3 days straight is bad for anyone. I finally convinced them that I’d watch you for a bit longer if they just got some sleep.”

“I see,” I said a little dejectedly.

My parents spent 3 whole sleepless days slaughtering monsters in retribution for me, then even came home and tried to wait for me to wake up. A ball formed in the back of my throat and as my fatigue seeped deeper into my body. I gotta keep my promise this time.

“You know you are pretty tough. I didn’t think you would wake up soon. But you need more rest, so go back to sleep, Son.”

Grandpa’s soothing voice lulled me back to sleep as I could no longer fight against the fatigue.

—-

Seana Shadowheart’s POV

I might be the worst mother ever. I thought that maybe, once I had my first child things would just come naturally to me. But I was wrong.

I sat here cradling my pride and joy waiting for him to wake up. I let this happen to him. It was all my fault Kaladin was injured like this. Only if I was a better mother, maybe this wouldn’t have happened in the first place. If I had just done a better job…

If I was a better mother I would have the answers. If I had a normal life maybe I would know what to say to him when he wakes up. But how could I possibly say anything to him when he has never even called me mom? I didn’t deserve to have such a handsome and smart son. He looks just like his father with his beautiful black hair. He’s gonna break a lot of peoples’ hearts when he grows up.

Dr. Jacobs had recommended that we love Kaladin with everything we have. But that wasn’t enough. Love wouldn’t help my son’s wounds heal. Love wouldn't mend his conflicted heart. But that’s all I could do, I just have to try my best, and love him with everything I had. And maybe one day, in his eyes, I would be his mother. I wanted nothing more than to be there for him, to be his mother. But I was scared that I couldn’t do it, that my love wouldn’t be enough and Kaladin would drift even further away.

Kaladin stirred and slowly opened his eyes. Our gazes met and I was at a loss for words. Dr. Jacobs had said something was different about him when he woke up briefly a few days ago. And I didn’t understand it, but something does seem different about him. His beautiful multicolored gemlike eyes seemed so soft as I felt their gaze in my very soul. I couldn’t say anything to him, I just sat there and stroked his long hair. It’s getting so long now. My heart ached as he spoke to me softly,

“Hi, Mom,” was all he said to me.

The floodgates opened and I began to cry harder than I ever had. Did he call me Mom? Why now? What did I do to deserve this all of a sudden?

“I’m sorry, Mom. I’m so sorry,” Kaladin looked so hurt, his voice was shaking.

Why was he apologizing to me? This was all my fault?

Kaladin raised himself up from the bed and embraced me. I couldn’t even manage words through my ugly sobs as I choked on the air. I just hugged him in return and continued crying.

“I love you, Mom, I'm so sorry, please stop crying, I’m sorry...” He choked out.

I could feel his tiny body begin shaking as he started crying along with me. I didn’t understand what was going on anymore. Kaladin never cried, even as an infant he only cried when he was hungry. Instead of trying to make sense of things I just continued to embrace my son and cry with him.

He finally called me Mom, and he said he loved me. I love you too, Kaladin.Please forgive me for being the worst mother ever.

—-

Kaladin Shadowheart’s POV

It felt good to finally tell my mom I loved her. I had been repressing these feelings for so long. I felt the weight of years of pent-up emotions leave my body as I cried along with her. I have never cried like this before. And I’ve never seen her cry like this. I must have worried her so much. Never again. I would never let my mom cry like this again.

We simply cried ourselves to catharsis. After our little episode, she finally spoke to me,

“I’m sorry too, Kal. I haven’t been a very good mom, can you forgive me?” She said while wiping away the snot and tears.

What? This woman has done nothing but support me. I didn’t have a mom in my previous life but I knew she was trying her best. It was my fault for being like this, for causing her so much grief. She felt this way because of me. Gah, I really am the worst. I don’t deserve this at all. I hugged her again and told her,

“You are the best Mom ever. You didn’t do anything wrong. Please don’t cry…” I begged as tears began to well up in her eyes again.

I didn’t know what she was thinking but I knew I had to make it right, so I just hugged her tightly again to stop myself from crying.

“How about we just start over, Mom?” I suggested.

It was a good middle ground. I didn’t even deserve this much. But maybe If we could start from square one, I could make amends, and I could really be her son. She hugged me tighter and spoke softly into my ears,

“Okay, let’s do that, but you have to make me a promise,” She said with a goofy smile.

“Yes, anything. I’ll do anything,” I pleaded.

She began to wipe my snot and tears away from my face and smiled down at me,

“Just promise you’ll never cry so hard in front of the person you like, you are too handsome to cry like this.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at this. If she was willing to joke around now maybe we could really start over. Hopefully, this could be the start of our relationship as mother and son.

“You should see yourself, mom.” I joked.

Looks like I got this ugly cry from my beautiful mother. She gave me a face of mock surprise and pinched my cheeks like she used to when I was a baby.

“That wasn’t very nice,” she pouted while puffing her reddened cheeks out.

We both broke out into laughter. My sides hurt from laughing so hard. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed this hard either. I think I can get used to this. It felt way better to embrace these feelings than it did to suppress them.

Just then my dad opened the door to my room, he looked like he had just woken up as his long black hair was disheveled and he was yawning,

“What did I just miss?” He asked.

“Good morning, Dad,” I said.

He just stood there confused moved his hair from his face,

“Uh… yeah… good morning, Son.”

—

It’s been about a month since the events of my birthday. I’ve finally recovered from my injuries and can walk normally again.

I’ve reconciled with both my parents and things are going well. It seems I can finally be their son, for real this time.

I’ve decided that I wouldn't tell anyone about my past. It would probably only complicate things beyond repair, and frankly, as far as I was concerned. Commander Kronos of Hades Squad had finally died in that jungle. I was no longer the same person I was 5 years ago. I finally have these Human emotions that I was robbed of in my previous life. I wanted to truly experience what it was like to live a normal life and not be somebody’s tool. A lot of these emotions confused me, but I knew one thing for certain, that I was happier than I have ever been.

My family and I were currently eating dinner when my dad asked me an interesting question,

“Hey, Kal. Would you like to go to school?”

School? I’ve never been to a school. But I honestly didn't see a reason. I was already getting a top-tier education from Grandpa. Going to school would cut into training time with both Dad and Grandpa.

“There is a little school run for kids in the village. Dr. Jacobs recommended that you attend a few days a week there. If you want to of course,” My mom said.

Huh, even gramps wants me to go to school? It seems my mom is on board with the idea as well. Maybe if I went to school I would be freeing my mom’s schedule more. She could go back to work full time again. But that was beside the point If my family wanted me to go to school. I would go to school.

“Okay, I’ll go to school,” I said simply.

With that, it looks like I will be attending my first day of school next week. This should be interesting.

[deathworld-commando-reborn]

Ch.4-Family and a Promise.

Today is the eve of my 5th birthday. I never had a birthday party before and have only ever been told about them. I was unsure what to expect, but Seana and Alanis were making moves behind the scenes. They asked me if I wanted to invite anybody else over. I didn’t really have anyone to invite, so I asked Dr. Jacobs if he would like to come. And to my surprise, he agreed. So for my very first birthday party, I would have Alanis, Seana, and Dr. Jacobs as my guests. Quite the crowd.

I had a dream again for the first time in a long time last night. It wasn’t a nightmare, thankfully. It was actually rather peaceful. In my dream, I was speaking with Doctor Suárez again aboard Vitality Medical Station. I don’t remember what we were talking about but I had a sense that I was forgetting something important. I tried to recall it but for some reason, it was just so hazy.

Actually, a lot of my older memories are starting to fade away slowly. It’s not that I’m forgetting them completely, it’s just that they are being pushed further back it seems, I doubt I could ever truly forget those days. I don’t know what any of these things mean for me but I am just so conflicted. What is going on, why am I here, and what does this place want from me? I guess I’ll just sleep on it tonight.

—

All four of us are currently sitting around the dining room table to begin my party. After being forced to give up baking me any sweets by Alanis. Seana ended up getting something from the port for the occasion.

“This is a dessert called a cupcake and it has a chocolate frosting, it’s very sweet and delicious,” explained Seana while casually licking some of the frosting off it.

Chocolate? I’ve only had a piece of chocolate one time. Some Marine gave me their chocolate ration bar as a thank you. I remember the taste and it wasn’t very sweet. It was actually really dark and bitter. The chocolate that was covering this cupcake was much lighter in color and I could practically smell the sweetness from here. I was just starting at the cupcake when Alanis urged me on,

“Well, go on now Kal, eat it!”

“But what about everyone else?” The cupcake was pretty small and I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to share it with everyone. I could hear Dr. Jacobs smack his face and began cackling,

“Boy, they bought it just for you! I swear, for someone so smart you really are hopeless sometimes.”

“It’s all yours. Go ahead and try it,” Seana reassured me.

I took a bite from the dessert and my mouth watered from the sweetness. Whatever that Marine gave me wasn’t chocolate.

This stuff was fantastic. I was hesitant at first but upon my second bite, I quickly began to devour my dessert. I defeated the chocolate cupcake in no time at all, much to the amusement of everybody around me.

“I guess he likes it,” said Alanis.

With a mouth full of delicious chocolate cupcake I gave a thumbs-up as I finished swallowing it.

“Now we have your gifts, Kal,” Seana gave me a small parcel that was wrapped up in a simple grey cloth. Wrapped up in the cloth was a bright red tunic. I sat there inspecting it for a few moments.

“Come on, try it on,” insisted Alanis.

I had begun to outgrow the teal shirt that was made for me. I tried the tunic on and it fit perfectly. It fell just below my hips and it was made using the mana weave material Seana makes. I could feel the tingling sensation on my skin as the tunic began regulating my body temperature. It was amazing quality as usual. I wasn’t too sure about thread count or anything but this must have taken her a long time to make, it was unbelievably soft. So far this was the most intricate thing she has made for me.

“Now what do you say to your mother, Kal?” Chided Alanis.

“Thank you, I like it a lot,” I said.

Seana had a big dopey smile as she said, “I’m glad.”

“Now it’s my turn.”

Alanis procured a long wooden box and handed it over to me. I ran my hand across the smooth lacquered wood, it was made from the same warm jungle wood that was common around here. Inside the box laid a small bow. The bow was made from a reddish-black wood and had Alanis’s craftsmanship all over it. I had thought that the wooden practice staff was nice, but Alanis had really outdone himself this time.

“Took me about a half a year to make her. That wood is from a tree that is native to our Dark Elf tribal region. I figured I could teach you how to shoot it sometimes if you want?” Asked Alanis as he scratched the back of his head.

It was just something he did every time he seemed to get embarrassed. But I didn’t see a reason to be. Out of all the weapons I had used before, a bow and arrow was probably something I had the least amount of experience in. Yet I still knew this bow was well crafted and took him plenty of man-hours to complete. It even had my name engraved in Elvish.

“Thanks, can you teach me how to use it soon?” I asked. I genuinely wanted to learn how to shoot a bow properly and it seemed I had a willing teacher.

“Of course,” answered Alanis with a warm smile.

“My gift might not be as fancy as these two, but I’m sure you will enjoy it nonetheless. Here you go, kid, happy birthday.”

Dr. Jacobs handed me a stack of 2 large leather-bound books. These books must’ve cost him a lot of money. Books and paper seemed to be pretty rare. Even Dr. Jacobs, who was probably the wealthiest person in the village only had a small collection of books. And most of those were medical-related. One book was titled, Deguzman’s Brief History of Illyricum, and the other book was Deguzman’s Guide to Magical Monsters and More. Seems like he got a buy one get one free from this Deguzman fellow. And Illyricum? Maybe that's the name of this world or continent.

Mmm, a history book and a monster information book. This could be interesting. There was just one problem, it was all written in the Human language that I barely knew. I was surprised the cover was in Elvish. Upon seeing this, Jacobs began cackling once again.

“Haha, sorry kid. Looks like you are gonna have to work a bit for my gift!”

I guess this book would double as material to learn the Human language as well. Even the old man was smiling now. My face hurt a little bit from smiling so much as well. Nobody has ever given me such personalized gifts before. My chest swelled with a warm feeling. This might be the happiest I had ever been.

Wait? I’m really happy? Is this what it’s like to be happy? I…I... don’t understand myself anymore.

The party continued on and we enjoyed a small feast in my name. Everyone else dished out what I assumed to be wine and began indulging themselves in it. The oddly sweet yet strong aroma began filling the room as everyone continued to enjoy themselves.

The event was enjoyable but I just had this sinking feeling in my stomach I couldn’t seem to shake. I began sweating and feeling nervous and uncomfortable in my own skin. I need to go for a walk.

I excused myself from the table, not that anyone noticed as they had become quite inebriated at this point.

—

Alanis Shadowheart’s POV

Today is my son’s first birthday party. I can only hope we made him happy. It was always so hard to tell what the boy was thinking. Even as a baby he always had a far-off look in his eyes like he was in deep thought. But today at the dinner table he seemed genuinely happy about his gifts and the cupcake we got him.

His adorable smile reached ear to ear on his handsome face that looked just like his mother's. But it wasn’t long after that he returned to his usually stoic face. It was almost like he didn’t want to be happy sometimes. I was thinking about these things when my wife asked Doctor Jacobs exactly what I had been thinking. Sometimes I swear she could read my mind.

“Dr. Jacobs… is there something wrong with Kal?” she asked him in a worried voice.

We had always been worried about him. We were told that babies were nightmares. That they could keep parents up for hours on end and were relentless in their attempts to make your life hell. Yet, as a baby, Kaladin would rarely cry.

Instead, he would often just lay in his basket staring off into the ceiling. We were worried he might have been ill at some points. It wasn’t until he began to speak that I finally understood that my son was different. He seemed to pick up on everything extremely quickly. I swear to this day he could understand us completely by the time he hit his first year of life.

“Do you want my honest opinion?” Asked Jacobs.

“If you don’t mind, Doctor,” I replied.

“Well of course something is wrong with the boy. I honestly believe he is a true genius. Not some bullshit kid who is just a little above average in intelligence. I mean a real genius, the type that only comes around every century, type of genius,” said Jacobs.

Dr. Jacobs was a man of many talents with a vast amount of knowledge. He was capable of feats many people could only dream of. Yet when he said this I could only feel conflicted. It’s not that I didn’t trust his judgment, there was no doubt my son was incredibly intelligent. With minimal assistance, he had learned the entire Elven language in under a year and had even begun learning more languages.

And according to Dr. Jacobs, his magic and mana lessons were progressing at blinding speeds. But I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing. I loved my son deeply. He is my first child and I would do anything in the world for the boy, yet I couldn’t help feeling something wasn’t right. I also didn’t want him to walk a similar path that we did...

“Honestly, there is no point in attempting to understand your son. Individuals like him are so far beyond our understanding, we would sooner find the answer to life than figure out what goes on in the mind of a genius. In my honest opinion, if you want to help your son. You gotta do two things for him.”

“And what are those two things?” Asked Seana nervously.

“First and foremost. Love your son with everything you have. I can truly say I have only meant one person I considered a genius, and over time they had become so disassociated with their own feelings it was like they weren’t even Human anymore.”

Could it be that Kaladin is already struggling with this? Maybe that far-off look he has isn’t what I think it is. Maybe he is struggling with his own inner demons? Have we failed him already? And how did this happen so soon?

“Second. The boy needs some friends. The kid is 5 years old and has nobody he can call a friend. With all that boy’s intelligence, he has the social skills of a pile of mud, a very smart pile of mud. Even a single friend would keep him from being stuck in his mind all damn day. If you let him stay up in there in that vast head of his, he will never come out of it,” warned Jacobs.

“And how do we get him a friend? I don’t think Kaladin would enjoy being around average kids,” I said.

“Exactly the problem. He shouldn’t be feeling that way, not yet at least. You gotta expose him to kids his age. Doesn’t Aila run a school for kids in the mornings? Send him there a few times a week,” Suggested Jacobs as he downed another glass of wine.

The old man was heading into his 84th year of life as a human, yet he still seemed as spry as ever.

“But aren’t you giving him a far better education?” I asked.

“Going to school teaches kids way more things than just stuff from a book you doofus. I swear for you two living so long you should be ahead of the game. Then again I guess you two didn’t really have a childhood either….” mumbled Jacobs.

True. Seana and I were far from normal. Kaladin really is the perfect mix of us. It really was our fault Kaladin was like this, we should have been paying better attention...

“Maybe we should just ask him?” Said Seana.

That was a good idea. Maybe it would be best to just ask Kaladin himself. I looked around but Kaladin was nowhere to be seen.

“Uh, where is Kaladin?”

—

Kaladin Shadowheart’s POV

I had escaped the house and wandered off into the jungle a bit away from the home. It was just becoming evening so there were plenty of hours of sunlight left in the day. I got a sickening feeling in my stomach as emotions swirled around in my head. I was just so confused and unsure of what I was doing. Here I was, in a fantasy world, living a second life. I just couldn’t come to terms with it all. It defied all logic, yet here I was.

Or perhaps I just wasn’t letting myself come to terms with it. I had grown sick and tired of these games.

“LISTEN HERE, WHOEVER IS FUCKING AROUND WITH ME OUT THERE, JUST KILL ME ALREADY! WHY ARE YOU KEEPING ME HERE!?” I screamed into the evening air.

I hoped some administrative figure would descend from the sky and tell me what was going on and what the purpose of all this was. That the simulation wound finally end and they would either kill me or spare me. Yet, my complaints and wishes were meant with the silence of the evening jungle.

I leaned up against a tree and slid my back down its rough bark onto the ground. I felt nauseous, as my emotions raged on in my head as I tried to make sense of all of this. My stomach lurched as I fought back the bile that threatened to escape my mouth. I felt light-headed and I couldn’t stop myself from shaking and sweating. I stared off into the cloudy sky and tried to calm my nerves.

But suddenly, every fiber in my body screamed at me. I sensed something close to me and began to panic. I was so distraught that I hadn’t even comprehended why the jungle was so quiet. It was because something was in it.

About 50 yards away from me I heard a bush rustle as something slipped out from it. It looked like an inky black dog with no neck or mouth. Its front legs were shorter than its back and it gave it a hunched appearance. It had 2 rows of 6 beat red eyes and sharp inky spines coming out of its slick back. It almost looked like a moving shadow despite the red eyes. I could feel it staring straight at me. I gotta run. Now.

I enhanced myself with mana and began a full sprint out of the jungle. It only took a few moments but I could hear that monster gaining on me. It was closing the distance and fast. Shit, it’s going to catch me.

Out of options and my heart pounding out of my chest, I spotted a tree that looked easy to climb and hoped that thing lacked the ability to climb. I didn’t see claws on it nor did it seem strong enough to just straight-up jump up the tree. I scurried up the tree at blinding speeds for a 5 year old. I was about 30 feet into the air when I looked down at the floor of the jungle. I began to sweat profusely as I could practically drink the bloodlust that thing was emitting. It just sat there, staring at me menacingly.

Then in a blink of an eye, I heard a whoosh then a thud as a black spine lodged itself into the branch right next to where my face used to be. I didn’t have time to think as I could hear the air whiz as more spines were launched at me. I began running through the canopy as fast as I could. I could still hear that monster launching spines and running after me from below.

A spine slammed into the branch I was about to land on and it gave away. I was in a free fall for only a moment, then I slammed into the branches on my way down to the jungle floor. I could feel my ribs break as I smashed through the canopy. I tried to hold onto a branch but instead, I just ended up smacking my head against a new one. I blacked out as I tumbled down to the jungle floor.

I woke up at the base of a tree. It only took one shallow breath to know I had destroyed my ribs and a few other bones. My head swam as I saw stars. Not only that a few yards away from me was that inky black monster. It fired a spine straight into my right shoulder, pinning me to the tree. I screamed out in pain.

I could only watch as it advanced on me. It didn’t have a face but I could tell it enjoyed hunting me as it let out a satisfied purr. My vision blurred as it began to sprint at me to finish me off. Like hell, I’m not going out this easy.

I waited for it to leap at me and I placed my hand onto the ground and willed a spike of earth to come forth. This spell was an Intermediate level combat spell called Earth Spike. Normally casting it only once would drain me completely, but I wasn’t about to let this monster have its way with me. Even if I died from mana sickness.

It leaped and my Earth Spike went straight into its midsection impaling the monster high up in the air. It let out a shrill scream of pain as it attempted to end my life. The inky blackness where its face should have been melted away, revealing razor-sharp teeth that attempted to rip my throat out. Using the last drops of my mana I sent a fireball straight into the mouth of the monster and watched it explode. Smoke fumed from the monster’s mouth. It was impaled on the brown spear of earth that I conjured, unmoving and staining it with oozing black blood.

I sat there, pinned to a tree and bleeding out with broken ribs and concussion. On top of that, I could no longer feel the right side of my body. It seems the monster's spine was poisoned. Everything hurt so bad.

I gazed off into the distance. All of this felt so real. Maybe, it really was real. All this time it wasn’t a simulation, I had actually been given a second chance at life. And instead of keeping my promise with Doctor Suárez and Heimdall to live life a little bit, I squandered a golden chance. I feel awful.

I heard them before I saw them. Looks like the little black ink monster has friends. And they weren’t happy. I looked out through blurry vision and saw a hoard of the monsters closing in on me, bearing those hideous rows of pearl white teeth at me.

Suddenly the closest one to me was blasted apart by a lance of white lightning. I could only barely make out the figure of Alanis descending from the shadows as he danced between the monsters slaughtering them. Only moments after Seana joined him, wielding two silver daggers and glowing a bright white as lightning arced around her licking her arms and legs. I watched as they risked their lives to try and save me. They were outnumbered yet they never stopped fighting.

I couldn’t help but feel so much worse now. Here were the two people who probably loved me the most in the world, risking their lives for me. Yet, I had never even called them Mom or Dad even once to their faces. I had even called my mom a witch and referred to my own dad as a Xeno. In my early times as an infant, I had even contemplated killing my own family. But here they were defending me in my final moments. It reminded me of what I did for Hades Squad and that sickened me even more.

If I had the strength to vomit I probably would. I was furious at myself. I had been living a convenient lie for the last 5 years. I had been lying to myself for 5 long years because it was easier to cover up and hide my new emotions than it was for me to face them. I was a weak little failure.

In truth, I was angry with being betrayed by Zeus and the rest of the Death Commandos. I was mad at Humanity tossing me aside when I was no longer needed. I was sad that I'd never see Hades Squad again. And I was devastated that I let Nyx die because of me.

I’d thought this life was some Navy simulation and not the real deal. And because of that, I failed in the worst ways possible. I failed not only my family in this life but I failed my closest companions in the last one as well. I’m so sorry Nyx, I’m so sorry Doctor Suárez and Heimdall. I should have never taken the life of Kaladin Shadowheart. Things would have been better that way.

I could only watch as they fought. My already blurring vision was filled with tears as I drifted off once again to the void of death. I probably wouldn’t get a third chance at life. And that was fine, I didn’t deserve it the second time anyhow. It’s a shame I am going to die with all these regrets and that filled me with even more pain in my heart.

If I had one more chance, I’d try to be the best son I could be. I’d call them Mom and Dad. I’d tell them that I actually loved them and that I was sorry for being the worst son to ever exist. I am sorry, Mom…Dad... I'm so sorry...

[deathworld-commando-reborn]

Ch.3- Lessons to Be Learned

It’s been a whole year since I’ve started practicing magic under Doctor Jacobs. I am nearly 5 years old now. He managed to convince Alanis and Seana that I am some type of mega prodigy that needed to be nurtured as soon as possible. They apparently weren’t surprised when the old man said this as they just kept shouting, ‘We knew our little elf is special!’ How embarrassing. But it seems they are supporting me at least.

The old man is a very hands-off kind of teacher. He often just sets me with a task and I go head first until I succeed or fail. Of course, he helps me when I need it, but I do prefer his approach. He can only tell me how to read and say a certain word so many times before it becomes redundant.

In the meantime, I have finally learned to read and write in Elvish. Apparently, there are a ton of languages. But nearly everyone here spoke Elvish. Even the Humans and Beastmen. I had also been studying up on the Human language and the Beastmen but it was just the absolute basics.

But on the flip side, I had learned a lot about magic and mana. So far I know that every living thing has mana. That included everything from a blade of grass, to a Human, all the way to giant sea monsters that lived in the ocean. Essentially, magic is just a living thing using its life force to create phenomenons. And these phenomenons are called magic. But, not everything with mana could use magic. People with enough mana and skill to use magic are called mages. Not every mage was capable of the feats.

More often than not, what kind of magic you could use and the size of your available mana is decided by your race, lineage, upbringing, and of course sheer luck. For example, Elves are commonly known for being adept in the elemental schools of magic while having one of the largest pools of mana amongst the races. It is commonplace for most Elves to be good at wind magic, however, outliers like me existed. I could not use wind magic to save my life.

On top of that, I learned that magic is broken up into schools. Most mages stuck to the 4 basic schools of magic that comprise the 4 major elements of earth, wind, fire, and water. However, there are many different schools ranging from plant or poison magic, all the way to light magic. Outside of the 4 elemental schools, these more niche schools are very rare and difficult to use. Normally for a mage to use one of these niche schools they had to either have a large mana pool, an affinity for the school, and more often than not, both.

Currently, the only schools of magic I am capable of using are earth and fire. And I am absolutely terrible at wind and water. I also didn’t have the mana to try any of the other niche schools like light magic. For a single measly drop of magic water, I could make 5 little balls of fire in its place. I just simply have an aversion to water and wind magic for some reason. Instead of wasting my time casting spells that often left me drained and tired, I have been doing two things.

One. I wore this teal mana weave shirt Seana made for me. It’s getting a bit tight on me now, however. Apparently, Elves and many of the other races love this stuff as it is said to increase your mana pool slowly over time as you grow, depending on the quality of the weave of course. And apparently, Seana is very good at making this stuff.

Two. I have been focusing on controlling my mana better. Mana actually has a lot of uses if you could control it. Nearly everyone learned to control their mana at some point, it allowed an average person to run faster, lift things they wouldn’t normally be able to lift, and even heal slightly faster. The simulation had deemed this to be a crucial factor for me so I had been focusing on it wholeheartedly. Before, I could only control a small little drop of mana around my body. And it used to take an extreme amount of concentration.

Now I can control entire flows of mana without even thinking about it. It's like commanding a vast amount of running water in my body. Using my superior control over mana I am now capable of casting more spells and strengthening my tiny weak body. Albeit not a considerable amount more but enough to make a notable difference. Compared to Dr. Jacobs my available mana was a small glass of water and his was a lake worth, maybe even bigger. Not only that, casting spells seemed to help increase my available mana over time. I went from nearly dying from casting a finger-sized flame to being able to cast a few tiny balls of fire.

Of course, it really wasn’t much in the grand scheme of mana or magic. The old man is pretty adamant that my mana pool would increase as I got older, and that by following these steps I am essentially paving the way for having an even larger mana pool in the future.

I had come to respect the old man quite a bit at this point. He went from being a crazy old doctor to an extremely intelligent teacher and mage. The man acted like he was all-knowing but he had the skills and knowledge to back it up. He is capable of using the rare school of light magic. Light magic is a notoriously difficult school to even become a novice in. But humans had a disproportionate amount of mages capable of using it. And being able to use light magic to heal people showed Dr. Jacob's rank in his school.

Mages who practiced a school of magic are ranked by a naming system. Starting at the lowest of Novice. Novices are mages that could use the school of magic without having negative side effects, such as mana sickness. Then there are Intermediate mages, these are mages who have a decent grasp on their desired school and could cast spells from it sparsely, and for not for very long in their chosen school. Most Intermediate mages could use only a handful or so of spells before needing to stop.

Expert is the next rank and this is where most of the capable mages sat at. They are experts with their chosen school and could use magic from it often and in large quantities for longer periods of time. These mages also tended to have decent-sized mana pools to boot. Expert mages also have good control over not only their school of magic but their own mana. Essentially, it is impossible for an Intermediate mage to ever rise to an Expert if they didn’t have control over their mana at this point, even if they had extreme amounts of raw talent for that school.

Then there are the head honchos of a magic school. The Masters and Grandmasters. The old man didn’t tell me much about them other than they are far beyond that of Expert, they are few and far between, and they should be taken very seriously. He guessed that 1 Master mage is worth 30 Expert mages.

As for me… well I am probably at the low end of being an Intermediate mage in both fire and earth magic. So with a lack of interest in anything else, I have now fully devoted myself to learning more about mana and magic. With the occasional language lesson here and there to keep things fresh.

I recognized the familiar footsteps of Alanis moving towards my door and prepared myself.

“And how is my brilliant son doing today?” He asked me while standing in the doorway to my room.

“Okay,” I responded simply.

I felt a tinge of regret as he narrowed his eyes at me. Perhaps that was too cold of me.

“Well, I have decided to begin your physical training. Starting today.”

The way he said it left no room for negotiations. Besides, I suppose I had lost myself in stimulating my brain that I may have left my body behind. But I am unsure what I was actually capable of with this small body.

“Now up you go. Since you don’t have your lessons till later in the day with Dr. Jacobs, you and I will start training in the mornings when I am not working.”

We walked outside to the back of the house and he began to give me a rundown of just what I was going to do. It consisted of running, bodyweight exercises, and stretching. Sounds pretty easy to me.

—-

It was not easy. I vastly overestimated my capabilities in this child's body. Just from running and doing a handful of push-ups for two hours, I am completely spent. It seems neglecting my physical body for favoring my mind has backfired greatly. I will have to readjust my goals and include physically strengthening myself once again.

I felt something poking me in my ribs as I lay down in the dirt exhausted. “Come now, use all that brainpower to spar a little bit with your dad.”

Now, this was something I could do. I might lack the physicality to keep up, but I have some experience in martial weapons to make up for it. Besides, Alanis had been showing off to me all day, now it was my turn. Of course, I couldn't go all out. But I can give him a swift strike in the manhood once or twice.

He tossed me a carved wooden poll that was actually perfect for my body. Even the makeshift training staff felt very balanced.

“I just finished that last week just for you. I think I did a pretty good job if I do say so myself,” he said proudly while scratching the back of his head.

“I like it, thank you.”

I am a little conflicted over enjoying something so trivial from an entity that only existed in this simulation. But I knew a good weapon when I saw one. Even if that weapon was made for training. It obviously took him a good amount of time to make this for me.

“Alright, let me show you how to-”

Oops. I had unconsciously dropped into the same stance that Alanis uses.

“Where did you learn that, Kal?” He said bewildered, his mouth agape and eyes big.

“I learned it from watching you.”

It was true. I had been observing him for so long this just felt like the natural thing to do. I could tell just by watching him that Alanis knew what he was doing. There was no wasted movement in his training. Always precise and he trained with a clear goal in mind day in and out. At least that’s what I understood from watching him.

“To think you could pick up my stance just by watching me. I didn’t know you were paying so much attention to me.” His look of surprise was replaced with a proud smile as he said this, “Now then, your feet and hands are off a bit let me show you.”

He continued on for a bit and explained his stance in depth. I was surprised to learn I was unfamiliar with it. I had trained in spear stances from not only Humanity but even some Xeno races. Spears are simple weapons, pretty much just meant for stabbing enemies. But on occasion, you could use them as a quarterstaff to maybe knock somebody’s feet from under them.

After his explanation, Alanis walked a few paces away and began to warm up. But it was much more than a simple warm up. The way he was moving was incredible. I had seen my fair share of choreographed moves with a spear, some with actual combat use, and some just for show. But comparing that to what Alanis was doing would be a sin. He is like a painter and the practice spear was his brush while the battlefield was his canvas. I sat there slack-jawed as he continued on for a few more moments before he stopped, and looked over at me. His face reddened with embarrassment and he managed to cough out a few words,

“Let’s begin. Come at me, son.”

I decided to use my small stature and get in close to get a blow in from underneath him. As I ran towards him I dodged one of his thrusts and tried to move in. Only to faceplant into the dirt as I tripped over myself. Damn this small body. I had made that move as if I was in my original body and paid for it by tripping over my own feet. Of course, Alanis couldn’t keep his laughter in as I got up and dusted myself off.

“That was a good try! But you gotta stay on your feet if you want it to work, son, hahaha!”

I could feel my face heat up from embarrassment as he laughed at me. I rushed at him once again in a flurry of stabs.

Of course, this was a futile attempt as Alanis simply blocked or evaded every single one of my thrusts. I then tried a full sweep of his legs only to get a swift bonk on my head from up top.

“Nice try going for my legs, but you are gonna have to be a bit faster than that!”

It just wasn’t fair. He has more reach, was way faster and stronger than me, and he probably has double my experience with a staff. Then I realized that I was trying to fight an uphill fight fairly. What was the point of spending a better part of a year on controlling my mana if I didn’t even use it? I allowed my mana to flow into every inch of my limbs as I felt my strength swirl up.

This time I would let Alanis come to me. He sent a simple thrust straight into my body and I exploded with double my normal speed and strength. I weaved around the thrust and closed the distance almost instantly. I could see his purple eyes get bigger as I thrust at his chest. Gotcha now.

I blinked for only a moment and suddenly I was staring straight up as I felt the weightlessness of my body crash into the ground. I slammed hard enough into the ground to bounce a bit as the wind got knocked out of me. What the hell just happened? I didn’t even see him move.

“Ah, crap! Sorry, Kal. I didn’t mean to hit you so hard,” Alanis said as he crouched down next to me. I took a few deep breaths and nothing was broken thankfully.

“I am so sorry. I didn’t know you could move so fast! I just kind of reacted without thinking, I’m sorry,” Alanis kept apologizing profusely till I reassured him I was okay.

“Umm, I think that’s enough training for today, Kal. And maybe don’t tell your Mom, please?” He said practically pleading with me.

“I’m gonna tell her,” That was all I said. I could see the color drain from his face as he began to panic.

“Listen, Kal… if you don’t tell Mom about this I will… uh… I WILL GET YOU A ROLL OF THAT SWEETBREAD YOU LIKE SO MUCH!”

Mmmm I did enjoy that bread. It was so soft and sweet. But that wasn’t going to cover my humiliation today.

“I want two rolls,” I demanded.

“Of course… two rolls. I can do that...” Alanis mumbled while nodding his head.

Well, today wasn’t a complete wash. At least I got some sweetbread out of getting my ass handed to me. I really did stand no chance against him in the end. And he was holding back the entire time. I’m still not sure what happened. I blinked and I was already falling. How the heck did he move so fast? I wonder if I could move that fast one day.

[deathworld-commando-reborn]

Prologue. 4

Aboard the Silent Night orbiting Odeus 5, 2 months after the initial assault.

It was a long 2 months but we finally routed Elunari forces off of Odeus 5. Their fleet had jumped away last week and there were only small pockets of resistance left on the planet. It was a shame we couldn’t just bomb them from orbit, the lush planet was just too valuable for humanity’s future colonies to be devastated like that.

All of Hades Squad was currently gathered in our shared “multipurpose room” as the engineers called it. It was just a small hangar that had been retrofitted to fit our needs. The room had everything from our training grounds, to Hepestus’s engineering bay, to Apollo’s medical station, even Nyx had a little spot where she had a couch to sleep on.

I was rhythmically smacking my hand against a datapad confirming all these damn reports. I had long since given up on reading these tedious AI-generated reports. They were just the same thing over and over again, weapon replacements here, munitions requests there, armor repair over there… Kill me now.

As if responding to my request, the hangar filled with the chimes of our communicators getting a ping. That’s odd. Normally, everybody doesn’t get a ping about a mission unless it goes through me first. I scrolled through the packet on my datapad. A search and clear on an abandoned Elunari space station? The Elunari rarely used space stations. Didn’t make sense for them, when they had so many habitable planets to live on. Not only that, they were orders from a Fleet Admiral, the highest-ranking officer in the Navy. Artemis was who was practically smashing her datapad with her finger groaned out,

“Commander this is bullshit! Why the hell are we going to some abandoned station in the middle of nowhere!?” Artemis asked fiercely.

That is something I wanted to know as well. This station was at the fringes of Elunari space according to the maps. Not only that…

“Who is a part of this Elysium Squad that we know?” questioned Apollo.

Seems I’m not alone. I’ve never heard of this Elysium Squad. And it was the lack of details about the squad that bothered me.

“According to the briefing, they are a fairly new team put together only a week ago, this is to be their first mission,” informed Nike.

Not only that, it was a Death Commando squad fully composed of the new third generation. It was also abnormal that they weren’t being led by at least a second generation. Normally when we worked with a squad I could pull up everything from medical records, past missions, even their specialties. But this Elysium Squad had almost none of that.

“I mean, I guess the information is incomplete if they are new. Makes sense to me,” shrugged Zeus.

“Doesn’t matter. Orders are orders. We won’t be taking the Silent Night out there, so get ready. We depart in 2 hours for the Stormspike,” I ordered.

—-

Two weeks later on the bridge of the dreadnaught class capital ship, Stormspike. In the fringes of Elunari controlled space.

It had been a long two-week trip to the middle of nowhere but we had finally arrived. A short older woman with blonde hair in a bright white officer attire stood at the helm of the dreadnaught, Stormspike. Very few people outranked a Commander of a Death Commando squad. I technically only answered to officials on Mars, but I was often under the jurisdiction of Rear Admirals or higher, sometimes even Marine Major Generals or higher as well.

But to be issued an order by a Fleet Admiral was a first for me. There were only about 20 of them in the entire Human Navy and they were responsible for well, entire fleets. I imagine they had far more important things to deal with than handing out missions to us Commandos, but I guess it’s time to find out. She turned and gave me a wide smile extending her hand and saying,

“At ease, it’s an honor to finally meet you, Commander Kronos, I’ve been looking forward to giving you my thanks in person for years now,” I returned the handshake.

Had I met her before? I must have had a dumb look on my face as I thought this because she answered for me,

“I don’t suspect you would remember me, I was just some lowly Captain when you saved the life of my crew and ship at the battle of Ingor. You knocked out the planetary guns just in time to save us. So, thank you, Commander. I owe you one,” She said thankfully.

Ah, the battle of Ingor was a particularly bad battle for the Navy if I remember. The Zantons were an aquatic Xeno race that had living bio-weapons that ate away at even our strongest metal. It was a gruesome fate to be blasted by one of their weapons.

“Just doing my job Admiral. But I suppose I’d like to call in that favor early. What can you tell me about the situation?” I asked. She smiled commenting,

“Straight to point with you, huh? Well, this mission has two objectives, Commander. You are to search the space station for anything of importance along with the reason the Elunari abandoned it. And you are to be with Elysium Squad on their maiden voyage.”

“I understand. I’ll do my best ma’am.”

“I know you will, Commander. In regards to the space station. All bio scans have come back negative and we believe the station to be abandoned. However, the station’s defense systems are still online. We will jump as close to the station as possible, then the fleet will engage with the station’s automated defenses. Once we wipe them out you will board the station, along with Elysium Squad, understood?”

“Understood, ma’am. We will complete our objectives.”

'“Good. We plan to make the jump in 2 hours. You are dismissed, Commander.” At least Admiral Wilson moves quickly. I imagine everybody doesn't want to be out here any longer than we have to be.

—

Hangar bay of the Stormspike, 30 minutes before assault.

I jolted awake in my harness. Another nightmare. This time was different, however. This time I was that Xeno child. I was falling as a long black arm stretched out to grab me. I felt so afraid and confused. What does this damn dream mean? And why would it change now all of a sudden? While combating my conflicted mind I peered downwards, Nyx was crouched down in front of me staring into my eyes intensely. Her nearly black eyes gazed right through me.

“Are you okay? You normally don’t doze off before a mission, that’s normally my thing,” She asked with a hint of concern.

“I’m fine. Just a dream, that’s all.” She stood up and furrowed her brows at me.

“Actually, I’ve never even seen you sleep before. Do you even sleep?” She asked honestly while tilting her head.

“Yes Nyx, I do sleep when I need to. I just don’t have to very often. I’ve been very tired recently is all,” I said shrugging off the feeling these nightmares left me with.

After Odeus 5, I’ve had this lingering feeling of fatigue over me that I can’t seem to shake off. Not only that, I wasn’t sure why I was telling Nyx my problems. Maybe I just felt comfortable around her. Nyx transferred to my squad after her entire squad was wiped out. She was the sole survivor. She has been with me ever since. By now she should have been promoted to a squad Commander at this point, but she had turned them all down. Maybe I was just looking too much into this, not everybody wanted to be a Commander. Nyx gave me a quick nod and stood up,

“If you say so.”

Currently, Hades Squad was making its final preparations for the assault. It shouldn’t be much longer before we launch out in a Tiger class transport craft. The Tiger class was just a flying tank specifically designed for boarding enemy stations and spacecraft. The craft used an onboard AI to fly the ship, which allowed the vessel to forgo having a cockpit that was normally a weakness on most ships. This allowed the craft to boast an immense amount of frontal armor and a far more powerful plasma shield.

While walking out the back of the craft to grab my bolter, the door to the hangar bay opened up. A group of 12 individuals wearing Navy blue and Marine red Death Commando armor sauntered into the hangar.

Why isn’t their armor black? I had never seen Commandos not use the standard black armor. Not only that, why was the squad double the standard size? Most Commando squads utilized 5-7 members. Perhaps they were trial-running everything with this new squad. A tall lanky man with short-cropped dirty blonde hair swaggered over to me, he was wearing the bright red version of the armor. He extended his hand,

“It feels good to finally meet the famous Commander Kronos, not only that I get to go out on my first mission with him, it’s an honor, sir.”

I took the man’s hand. This was always an awkward situation. Although we share the same rank I was technically his senior, however, he was nearly double my age and had probably been serving before I even popped out of my growth tank. I guess I’ll just take this in stride.

“Likewise, Commander. Say, what was your callsign, I didn’t catch it?” I asked.

In truth I didn’t know any of Elysium Squad’s names, apparently, I hadn’t been privy to that information.

“Ah sorry, that was rude of me. Commander Nicholas Clarkson, former Marine Force Recon turned Death Commando.”

No callsign? What was the purpose of that I wondered? Why would they give the squad a name that was associated with Human gods but not assign names of gods to themselves? I didn’t understand Doctor Octario’s logic on this one, but then again I rarely understood her genius. Apparently not noticing my internal struggles he continued,

“Anyways, I figured since the station has two wings we can just split the station and work through it that way.”

“That’s fine with me. Do you want us to take a few of your members with us? Balance things up a bit more?”

“Nah. No need. Might as well start working together as a team now, you know?”

“Sure. We can do it that way.” I responded a little dejectedly.

I would have liked to take a few of his men and show them how we operated. But I was just ordered to go with them on this mission not hold their hand. This was Elysium’s squad’s mission, I should just defer to Commander Clarkson. Only the best of the Marines joined Marine Force Reconnaissance, and an even smaller portion got chosen for the new 3rd generation God Program. Let’s see what the new guys are capable of.

“Awesome man, well, I’ll see you out there, Commander. Glory to humanity,” he said while giving me a large grin. Guess the guy is a patriot. That’s nice.

“To humanity,” I shot back with a salute.

We parted towards our respective landing crafts. I walked up the ramp into the back of the Tiger. Everybody was strapped in and we were ready to launch. We should be dropping out of warp any time now. I strapped in and awaited the gut-churning suffering that was about to be bestowed upon me.

As we came out of warp the thunderous blasts of the dreadnaught’s heavy rail guns battered away at the station’s defenses. So far, no Xeno race had managed to defend themselves from the sheer destructive power of a dreadnaught class rail gun as they thundered off. A few volleys later, and a synthetic voice ringed out in our helmets,

“Launching in 3..2..1.”

We blasted straight out of the hangar, barreling towards the station. The Tiger class transport would breach into an enemy ship or station by ramming into it using its plasma shield as a sort of battering ram. Once the shuttle gained purchase into the target, it would seal the breach using a metallic foaming agent, of course, any sort of environment would be sucked out into space. But our suits were more than capable of surviving the vacuum of space or any hostile environment.

Just moments after launch we were violently thrashed around as we slammed into the station. Hephaestus and I would lead the charge using portable plasma shields almost like riot guards as we forced our way onto the station. We weren’t expecting resistance, but it was better to be safe than sorry.

The gangplank slammed down and we charged into the station. We were greeted by long hallways painted pastel blues and greens. Although the Elunari used plastics for construction it seems they used metal for this space station. I pinged both squads and got all green lights. Elysium squad must have had a successful breach as well.

We walked carefully down the hallways clearing each and every room we passed. We didn’t even use our built-in communication systems, instead, relying on tried and true hand signals, to clear the station. So far the station seemed rather simple, with plenty of crew quarters and what I can only assume to be common rooms. The station itself was actually well lit and seemed to still have its power active.

We reached a large atrium, an artificial ecosystem was set up, plenty of lush greenery that was common on most Elunari worlds was present here. It seemed almost like a park, with benches and tables to sit down at it. The place even had a running waterfall. Seems this was just some kind of housing station.

I was getting lost in the moment when I peered back up at my radar. Suddenly all of Elysium Squad’s pings had gone away. They weren’t killed or they would still be showing up, also there hasn’t even been a single sound besides us stomping around. I flicked around to see if everybody noticed, only to catch a glimpse of Zeus and Nike standing at the entrance we came in from. Not expecting me to turn around suddenly, Zeus quickly smashed the controls on the wall, dropping the metal bulwark door. Before I could even question what the hell was going on they dropped off the radar as well. I tried beckoning them on the communication implants but I was being jammed.

I looked around to see the rest of my squad appearing to be just as confused as me. Artemis yelled out,

“What the fuck is going on!”

"No idea,” Apollo stated, not even bothering to cover up the worry in his voice. Hephaestus looked over to me and asked,

“Commander?”

“I don’t know. Everybody just dropped off the radar and our comms are being blocked. I can’t even reach the Stormspike.”

Upon my response, everybody dropped into a defensive position. I maxed out my plasma shield core and waited.

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this, Commander,” Nyx whispered from behind me.

Yeah, something was very wrong. Then that’s when I heard the rhythmic thundering of armored feet running on metal. I looked over to the second entrance that leads towards the other side of the station and saw blurs of red and blue in the hallways. We waited a few moments then an enhanced voice called out to, it was Commander Clarkson,

“What's up Hades Squad. Sorry about this but let’s talk things out, yeah? Don’t be doing anything you would regret, okay?”

“What the hell is your problem, Commando?!” yelled Artemis.

“Artemis, stop. We are surrounded,” I ordered.

By this time the last hallway leading out had also been filled with blue and red blurs moving around. It seems Elysium Squad has some alternative objectives on this mission. And I wasn’t about to fire on these humans. Not yet at least.

“Alright now. Go ahead and listen to your Commander right now, miss. He knows what’s best. Listen, we only want one thing you see. I’ll be honest, I’m not too happy about it but I gotta do what I gotta do, you know? Mars has deemed Commander Kronos as defective and we are to terminate him. Simple as that, nobody else has to get involved. Just turn yourself over Kronos and the rest of your squad gets to go home.”

Well. This is completely unexpected. I always knew my time would come in my service to humanity, but I didn’t think it would end like this. Although I couldn’t see their faces, my entire squad looked at me questioning just what I had done. Hell, don’t ask me.

"It’s alright everyone. Really. Don’t worry about me, okay?”

Artemis walked over to me and head-butted me. Although it probably hurt her more than me I just stood there shocked as she began to rail into me,

“Fuck all of that! Like we would let anyone terminate you, I don’t care what you did. You are MY Commander and I refuse to let things end like this”

Everyone voiced their agreements with Artemis. Ah, of course. I couldn’t help but smile a little bit at their kind words. I appreciated it, but it was unnecessary. There was no way around this and I wasn’t going to ask my squad to perish with me, there was no way I could do that.

“Thank you, everyone, I couldn’t have asked for a better squad,” I said as honestly as possible.

I truly did mean it. I’m not exactly sure how I felt about everyone, but I knew I was thankful they were with me. And valued each and every one of them immensely. That's why I couldn't let them come with me. I sadly didn’t give anyone a chance to respond to my parting words.

I forced the injection of my Ambrosia into my bloodstream. It was a cocktail of highly efficient combat stimulants, pain killers, and a mix of other useful drugs. Normally it was only injected when a Death Commando was on the brink of death. Once Ambrosia was injected into you, it was pretty much a guarantee you wouldn’t survive the side effects of the drugs, only us first-generation Commandos could survive it.

With my speed, strength, and reflexes being pushed to the absolute extreme I released the flashbang I was holding in my hand, although our helmets would negate most of it, the blinding light would still affect them for just a few moments.

I opened palmed striked Hephaestus under the chin. He would be the only one that could physically stop me and I couldn’t allow that. I swept Artemis and Apollo’s legs from out under them and dropped another flashbang just to be safe.

I ripped the plasma shield from Hephaestus’s limp hands. I maxed the core out making a makeshift bubble around me as I forced my way through my squad towards the hallway Commander Nicholas wasn’t in. I smashed the door controls in just as Zeus had done and dropped the bulwark as a black figure quickly slid under the falling door and tackled my legs from underneath me. While tangled up under her I yelled out,

“Nyx! What are you doing!”

“I can’t let you go too, Commander. I can’t let you die alone... not like them.”

“It’s suicide! Please don’t do this! They want me not you. It doesn’t have to be this way,” I pleaded.

It wasn’t too late for her to turn around.

“I don’t care. I made this decision a long time ago. You are all I have left,” she said with equal parts conviction and sadness. “I can’t be the last one left, Commander. I just can’t…”

I didn’t have time to argue anymore as bolter fire rained down the hallway smashing into the plasma shield bubble. These things were meant for Elunari energy weapons, not bolters. The shields wouldn’t hold for long.

I rolled over and stood in a closed doorway with Nyx. I didn’t want things to end like this, I wanted to simply put enough distance from Hades Squad so they wouldn't get involved as I turned myself in peacefully. But now… I can’t let her die here. Guess I won’t be getting a medal for this.

I grabbed a shredder grenade from my belt and turned off one of the plasma shields. Normally, a simple shredder grenade would barely damage a Death Commando in their armor. But combine that with a plasma core explosion and they would be lucky to be alive. I used the last bit of energy from my shield to step into the hallway and toss the nade along with the shield core down the hallway.

I took cover as the white-hot plasma shrapnel turned the hallway and its occupants into a paste. I motioned for Nyx to get ready as I unslung my bolter to finish off any survivors. We charged down the hallway and blasted a few stragglers who survived the explosion. As we made it down the hallway a door slammed open as a man in navy blue armor shot me in the shoulder.

He must have had time to close the door and hide in the room, lucky bastard. Nyx reacted faster than him and blew his head off with a single shot. I signaled a ‘Thanks’ and we began to move down the hallways. The only chance we had of surviving was to make it to Elysium Squad’s Tiger.

Suddenly, bulwarks started closing manually as we were running down the hallways. Our engagement had killed half of Elysium Squad and now we were being corralled like livestock through the station. I only had one more plasma core and we were nowhere close to the Tiger, so I couldn’t blow through the bulwarks. We started running again at max speed down the hallway when a thunderous boom echoed through the halls. Time slowed as I flicked around to see Nyx shove me out of the way. There was no doubt that it was a railgun.

Without thinking, I scooped her up into a princess carry and carried her down the hall. I barged straight through a door hoping to find somewhere to hunker down. I turned and began to take stock of her injury.

I looked down at my hands and shoulders that were now smeared in blood. Blood was pooling around Nyx quickly as I noticed the head-sized hole in her abdomen. No… no this can’t be happening. The railgun had gone clean through her, destroying her insides and her spine. Time was moving so slow as I racked my brain to find a way to save her… Nyx dimmed her visor to reveal her face.

“Sorry, Commander…,” She repeated like a mantra over and over again.

“It’s fine Nyx, you are gonna be okay,” I lied. I tried injecting hemostatics, to slow the bleeding down but it wasn’t working.

“Hey Commander, we were friends, right?” she asked, coughing up blood into her helmet.

What? Why are you worried about this now of all times you airhead! I… I don’t know. Nyx didn’t really talk to anyone. I guess she spoke to me the most out of everybody, and I did feel closer to her. It’s not that I wasn’t close with the rest of the squad, it was just that I was closer with Nyx. She always made an effort to speak to me, even if it seemed to make her uncomfortable. I was just thinking early about how I felt comfortable around her as well. Perhaps. This is what it means to be friends. I stopped fiddling around with random medical equipment and steeled myself. I can’t save her…

I dimmed my own visor to respond, “Yeah Nyx, you might have been my only friend… thank you for sticking with me all these years, I probably wasn't a very good friend,” She gave me a genuine ear-to-ear smile I had never seen her smile so brightly before.

“Yeah... you kinda sucked. But I wasn't much better, but I’m glad… and hey, I told you didn't I. That I didn’t trust Zeus and the 3rd Gens,” she said weakly.

She has lost a lot of blood. The fact she was still alive was a miracle in itself. She should have died instantly. I ignored the thundering of metal boots outside, it didn’t matter right now, all that mattered was seeing my friend off.

“Yeah… you did try to warn me, sorry.”

“It’s fine. Sorry I have to die first. I didn’t want you to go alone but looks like I failed.” She said even weaker now, the light was starting to fade from her eyes.

There was no point in sugar-coating it. The odds of us surviving this was astronomically low from the start. Even if we managed to get to the Tiger we were surrounded by an entire fleet with a dreadnaught. We wouldn’t have even made it out of the station alive.

“I’ll be joining you soon enough Nyx,” I said.

With her dying breath, she left me one with one final wish,

“Maybe… if we are lucky, I’ll get to see you again someday, Commander.”

I didn’t get an opportunity to respond to her final wish as her squad light went from a bright red to black. I closed my eyes and I prayed for the first time in my life, not for me but for Nyx. Perhaps, if there really was a god they would be merciful to her. She didn’t deserve to die, not like this. Yeah, maybe one day.

A familiar voice called out to me from the hallway,

“Doesn’t have to be like this Commander, just turn yourself in and this can all be over,” yelled Zeus.

I could see the barrel of the railgun he was carrying from the doorway. Currently, I was in some type of shopfront type room behind the counter. A swelling feeling rose in my chest and reached my head. It clouded my vision and my heart raced in my ears. Is this what it’s like to be angry?

I might have been suppressing this rage since the raid on the facility, not sure what to do with it. I had never felt that way until that night. I prepped and tossed the shredder grenade with a plasma core towards the doorway. Zeus surprisingly stepped into the doorway and activated a plasma shield. He then swatted the grenade combo using the damn shield, right back at me. Shit.

The explosion destroyed the counter I was using as cover. I didn’t need to feel pain to know I was beyond repair. My legs had been ripped clean off from the plasma core explosion. And I had taken an immense amount of internal damage. I was only conscious because of the combination of my armor and the Ambrosia.

I took out my bolt pistol and began firing through the walls. I might be on the edge of life and death but I could still shoot. I heard the distinct noise of Zeus’s plasma shield being battered so I adjusted my aim further down the wall. I was rewarded with sounds of bones and amour being blown to smithereens as my bolt rounds exploded through the walls into anyone unfortunate enough to be in their way. I wasn’t sure to what extent the other members of Elysium squad were involved, but it didn’t matter to me. They will pay for their transactions with their dying breaths. However, I had to reload at some point and I wouldn’t last long after that. My ammo was stored where my legs used to be and those excess rounds just added to the carnage that was my body.

Finally, my bolt pistol clicked instead of fired, the steam rising from the red hot barrel clouding my vision. Elysium squad breached the room and dispersed the haze. Zeus sauntered over to me a crouched down in front of me with a plasma pistol in hand poking my chest,

“Well, you just had to go and make a mess? Do you know how many good men died today because of you? You killed a lot of my friends today... Hey! Are you listening to me,” Zeus continued to yell at me while poking the barrel of his plasma pistol into my injuries. Of course, I felt nothing and I said nothing.

He just laughed, “Look at how the mighty have fallen. Don’t tell me you bled out now, Commander? Humanities finest weapon done in by blood loss? Pathetic.”

Of course, he seemed to be enjoying himself a little too much. Perhaps he is a sadist or something. But he got careless. I may be dying but I am far from dead, as I was beyond pissed for the first time in my entire life.

With surprising speed from what seemed like a corpse just moments ago, I swatted the pistol out from his hand then dragged his arm into me as I put him in a bear hug. I squeezed as hard as I possibly could. I felt my own ribs crack as I shattered his as well. I put every ounce of strength I had left into crushing this bastard.

He was screaming and trying to push away from me. He was far beyond a normal human. But he was nowhere close to my strength on Ambrosia and adrenaline. But it seems I underestimated my injuries as I began to waver. I guess I had lost a lot of blood already, I was probably squeezing even more out now. Eventually, I couldn’t keep the same strength up as he pushed off me and rolled over gasping for air and coughing through his helmet. Nike walked over to us while I began to struggle to stay awake.

“You fool Zeus, you should have just shot him in the chest and been done with it. Doctor Octario only needs his head intact. Now here you are dying right with him. Just because you wanted to play around, you always do this shit,” Nike stood over me now and pointed his bolter at me.

“Sorry, Commander. It really wasn’t personal, but I guess you had to go and make it personal. In my honest opinion, I thought you were a good man and a good leader. And if it helps, I am sorry about Nyx, she shouldn’t have died with a bastard like you. I'll make sure her body gets a proper burial." I heard the bolt crack as time slowed down again. The bolter round barreled into my stomach as I began to blackout.

At least I could die in solace knowing I had avenged Nyx. I used Zeus’s own ribs as daggers to stab into his lungs, stomach, and heart. It was doubtful there would be enough time to save him. I felt the round heat up and expand. Then there was nothing.

I seemed to be floating away in an endless black void now. So, this is what it’s like to die. It was warm, even comforting. No pearly gates or bearded man awaiting me, nor was there a hellish fiend waiting to drag me down to the depths of hell.

Wait, what was that? Who’s there?

The feeling of someone being there was replaced instantly by a bright light. Ah, the infamous light at the end of the tunnel, huh? I had heard many final breaths on the battlefields as Marines called out to the light, embracing it, only for the light of their life to flicker out from them. I had often just subscribed that behavior to the dying. But now it seems it is real. I was moving faster towards the light or was the light coming to me? Guess it doesn't matter. Suddenly, the light began to hurt instead and excruciating painful noises assaulted my head.

Wait… pain? You aren’t supposed to feel pain when you die.