#reid ds

[imaginingcriminalminds]

CopyCat

Title: Copycat Author: totalfanfreak Rating: T Prompt/Summary: Spencer returns depressed after visiting his mother, you decide to find a way to cheer up or piss him off. (Maybe best set in Target Rich) Main Character(s): Spencer Reid/ Reader Trigger Warning: Don’t think so Word Count: 1100 Beta/Editor: Me Multishot: Nope Author’s Notes: outfit on polyvore - http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=207573526, just something I typed out of some depth of mind. Have no real idea how it is… Morgan arc spoilers?: Nope

Spencer had been quiet ever since he had gotten back from visiting his mother. You knew things had to be bad - the constant v in between his eyebrows, lack of eating, no spouting off facts, and the increased jittering of his feet and fingers. They all showed his anxiety; he was only going through the motions at work. Maybe he hoped it would be an escape, clearly, it wasn’t working. You had tried to engage him several times, offering to go out, or just be an ear for him. He’d wave you off absently, leaving as soon as the clock struck five. Everyone had been murmuring about it, missing their genius, wishing they could help him and bring him back to himself.

You had no real way of knowing how to do that, but you did know with Halloween fast approaching that had to peak some of Spencer’s interest. And with his April Fools’ prank looming over you – Spencer had thought it funny to superglue you to your chair. No change of clothes and everyone too busy laughing to help you right away. It had not been pretty, and when you were free your wrath had not been either. You knew he could do with some payback. And if anything perhaps it would shake him back to himself.

Rummaging through your closet you smiled at what you grabbed. Oh, this would be fun. Instead of your usual attire you dressed head to toe in what you would call the geek chic. Heck, you even felt smarter when you put the false glasses on. Tying your hair back you gave yourself a once over with a nod. This was either going to go brilliantly or it was going to be a disaster. You knew something was going to happen either way.

Walking into the bullpen you were aware of the looks you were getting and you gave a good imitation of the Reid wave as you passed them.

“Oh, my God mama what is this?”

You looked over to Derek whose eyes were scanning you with amused shock. You shrugged. “Well, I wanted to see if this would cheer Reid up, if not then at least you have a substitute genius for a while.”

Morgan shook his head laughing promising to keep a good seat when Reid did show up. Of course he did, though he was usually hours early he was now just promptly on time taking a seat at his desk setting to work without bothering to greet anyone. You kept to yourself, letting him see you in his own time, a few hours had crawled by and you had been sucked into your own work when you heard a searing growl.

“Damn it!”

Looking up over the frames you saw Spencer clutching his index finger, blood beginning to weep from the apparent paper cut. “Did you know there are more nociceptors in the fingertips than anywhere else on the body that’s one of the reasons paper cuts hurt a lot more than other types of cuts.”

You had gotten his attention then, and Spencer had to take a double then a triple take with you, your look finally sinking into him. “Y/N, what are you doing?”

You shrugged nonchalantly. “I’m only telling you about why paper cuts hurt. Also because they won’t bleed as much as a normal wound and because paper is so flimsy it is more of a dull knife effect which cause the increased pain.”

He shook his head, annoyance spreading over his features. “Why are you doing this?”

You looked down, already seeing the plan failing. “I missed you, we all do, might as well have a carbon copy if we can’t have the real one.”

“I’m right fucking here, Y/N.”

“You are, but you aren’t. You’re somewhere else and you won’t let anyone else in to ease your grief. I’m just a friendly reminder that it’s okay to be happy when things are bad.”

Spencer looked off distantly.

“You know friendship has been linked to having less tension, suffered from less stress, had stronger defenses and lived longer.”

“Hmm, and what are the studies on burdening down friends with personal problems?”

You pushed the glasses back up, before templing your fingers together. “Well, you see, there’s the problem there’s not really been any real studies done to show any pros and cons. Perhaps we could contribute.”

“Look, Y/N, I appreciate what you’re trying to do, really I do. But I’m not up to talking about it here.”

“What about somewhere else? We could go out; you could show me how many cups of sugar to put in my coffee.”

Spencer snorted, scrubbing his face with his hands in exasperation. Until you heard the shuddering of breath that indicated he was crying. Going over to his desk you lightly wrapped your arms around his lanky frame. Hoping it was okay to give him the contact.

“She’s bad, Y/N. She’s doing so badly. I don’t know what to do.”

You didn’t need to dress as a genius to know he was talking about his mother. “The only thing you can do. Be there, talk to her, keep writing to her, and let her know your love. And we’ll be here to let you know you’re loved too.”

His head was still dipped, not bothering with the strength to lift it up. “Thank you. I-I’ve been struggling.”

“You don’t have to do things alone, Spence.”

He gave a tired smile, the old him slowly shining through. He reached up and gently removed the glasses from your face. “Thank you. I don’t think you have to sub for me any longer.”

You smiled. “I don’t know, maybe I like being the smart one of the group. I know I like the cardigans for sure.”

You snuggled in the fabric for emphasis. “I’m glad you’re back, Spencer, but don’t let things bottle up any more. Okay?”

“I promise.”

You held out your hand. “Pinky swears?”

Spencer pursed his lips before linking his pinky with yours, at the last second kissing your knuckle before pulling away. You blushed as you hand retracted. Spencer’s eyes slowly lit up. “And there you are.”

[imaginingcriminalminds]

The Definitions between Heroes and Villains - Chapter 7

Title: The Definitions between Heroes and Villains – Chapter 7 Author: totalfanfreak Rating: - Chapter: T+ - Story: M Prompt/Summary: Next Chapter – Chapter Summary: Main Character(s): Spencer Reid/ Reader, D. Morgan Trigger Warning:  - Story: - Chapter: None in this chapter Word Count: Beta/Editor: Me Multishot: Yep (All chapters can be found via the “Karita” tag or totalfanfreak’s author tag. Author’s Notes: Ppl have been telling me the chapters are too long for posts so I thought to shorten them Morgan arc spoilers?: Not quite there

Reflective(adj.): relating to or characterized by deep thought; thoughtful

“Are you going to move anytime soon?”

“Oh, hush, I’m thinking.”

Spencer adjusted his glasses before looking from the chess board to his opponent. He smiled at Karita’s concentration for the game. Her eyebrows were furrowed, her chin resting in her palm as she studied their pieces. She had gotten quite better at it; she had been telling the truth that it had taken a little while for her to pick up on things. Her mind had refused to take in the information immediately. But she was prevailing and she had already taken many of his pieces from the board, though that didn’t mean she was going to win, of course.

He couldn’t seem to take his eyes off of her as she pondered her next move. He had been enjoying her company, even more so now that she was staying with him as her apartment was cleared. He chuckled internally, knowing it would set her off if she knew what he was laughing at. She had been cleaning her apartment, she said that’s what she always did on Sundays, and was mixing the cleaning supplies in a bucket. Her mind had idled elsewhere and instead of pine cleaner she picked up toilet bowel cleaner instead, mixing that with the bleach already in there. She had pretty much made mustard gas. The poison control had called a hazard team and everything to evacuate the floor and the one above it. Luckily the only homes that were in any danger since Kari lived in the farthest apartment were hers and her neighbor, Mrs. Fargus.

Karita had put up the elderly woman and her Yorkie in a nice hotel until the apartments were inhabitable again. Spencer had been incredibly angry at her, almost to the point of yelling when he had found her with a medic in the chaos outside. But it had receded, when he saw how guilty she looked. She had felt bad for being foolish, and after his rant so had he. He couldn’t let her stay in a hotel, not since he had been staying in her apartment a good majority of the time. And though he was incredibly nervous with the idea he insisted she stay with him. He never had many people in his home, let alone a woman, well, there was JJ and Garcia, but they didn’t count, did they? They were female, but he didn’t view them in the same way. He didn’t mind how his home looked when they came over, but Kari, what would she think of the sprawling mess of papers and books? The lack of food in the fridge? The way he left his socks all over his bedroom? It wasn’t dirty he dusted and cleaned the place when it was needed, he was just messy organized.

But his hand shook when unlocking the door nonetheless and fidgeted foot to foot as she looked around. She had picked up his spare glasses he had forgotten on his book shelf and looked through the frames, realizing there was no way to see through them she propped them on her head and studied the shelf.

“How do you reach the ones at the very top?”

He came up behind her then, almost a good foot taller than her and touched the bottom of the second to last one. “Usually for those I get a step stool.”

He looked down at her and smiled, she smiled back as she stood up on her tip toes not coming close to touching the one he had. “I’d probably need a ladder.”

He had laughed, nerves disappearing. It had been a nice few days, it was odd, but in a good way to have somewhere there to talk to, to cook and eat with, to just enjoy time together. He had viewed the apartment as an extension of the workplace and a place to sleep. But all of a sudden with another presence it had become cozier, a place to look forward to coming to. The only drawback were the rabbits, Kari had warned him but he had waved it off, not believing the small creatures could cause any real damage. The first morning he had went to make coffee he had found his copy of Paradise Lost in shreds along with one of his throw pillows tore to pieces the stuffing seeping out like clouds. Kari had been more upset than he had, though he was disappointed that he had not thought it through correctly. She had pinned up plastic over the bottom of his bookshelf and put the pillows, as well as his papers up on the dresser at night. She had also tried to cage them at night, but being used to freedom for so long Spencer could hear their whimperings in the bedroom and after tossing and turning couldn’t take the pitiful sounds any longer.

Kari had giggled at him from her side of the bed, claiming he was nothing but a big softie. That had to be his favorite thing, sharing his bed. He had never imagined a beautiful woman would be so willing to lie side by side with him. The nightmares were never completely gone from either of them, but it was a comfort to have someone there with him. Just to be able to watch her peaceful slumber put him back at ease enough to try again, whereas before he would inhale pot after pot of coffee to avoid what waited for him when he shut his eyes. She hadn’t even blinked when she saw his Tardis nightlight. She had grinned exclaiming she knew where that was from.

It did worry him though about where he was supposed to take things. They never put a real definition to what they were, at the moment it could be very good friends, but was he able to put more behind it? It scared him that he could mess something up so easily. The only other girl that he had kissed was Lila Archer, he never counted the ones that had used him in college, and in the end all it did was spark too many questions. Should he tell Kari about that? Would she be mad? Jealous? Would she want him to kiss her? He knew she didn’t have much experience either, only being with her childhood sweetheart. But Spencer knew it was different for guys, the whole double standard and all that, and though he didn’t very much believe in it he wondered how much experience a guy was supposed to have. He wished he could talk to someone about it, Morgan maybe, but then again, he had no desire to deal with the teasing that would ensue.

Some nights they would be sitting on the couch together, and he would turn to her, his mind whirring about what to say – I’m sorry, I’ve only kissed one other person besides you and have no as to what I’m supposed to do. That the times in college when girls acted like they liked him because they wanted something from him, or that the time she had met him tied to a goalpost was because he was told a girl, Alexa, he’d never forget that name, had feigned minor interest in him. He had so many issues with trust, and for once in his time a lack of knowing, he felt smothered. And before the whole mess spewed from him, she’d turn to him suddenly, a small, sad smile on her lips as she reached out to cup his cheek as if everything he had thought had been spoken out loud.

It was those little gestures Spencer craved; he already knew Kari had a tendency to touch. She was a very tactile person; he had known that from his first observation of her. The way she had downcasted her eyes, and the firm to limp of her hand when she realized he would not shake it. And he had watched this from her, knowing that the denial of touch was a form of rejection to her. It was odd, they were completely opposite on many things but from his fear of contact to hers being refusal of contact was something he hadn’t gotten over.

He had explained to her the amount of germs spread through a single handshake, that many hospitals and restaurants were banning it as a form of greeting due to the infections and illnesses spread through the establishments. She had rebutted with she’d just wash her hands afterwards. Except he knew she watched him as well and before long her handshakes and hugs began to cease and he had felt guilty. She had thrown it off with a shrug, claiming she liked being able to touch him more than a stranger. But he had told her it was fine to resume, not wanting to diminish her personality. Though he had begun tucking bottles of hand sanitizer in her bag for that reason, even if the studies had shown they were not as effective as the bottle claimed.

“Are you going to move, or are you going to sit there staring at me, Professor?”

The nickname jerked him from his reverie. It always seemed to do that, he knew it was the playful side of her personality, but he couldn’t help the male side of him that imagined her saying that in a different scenario.

“Can’t I do both?”

She smiled, the humor evident on her face. “I suppose so, what were you thinking about so intensely?”

He shrugged his eyes peeling away from her and onto the board. “Mainly about you.”

“Me?”

Before it would’ve been so hard to be that honest with someone, now it came as steady as a gulp of coffee. “Yes, am I not allowed to think about you?”

It was teasing and she knew it. “Of course you can, Spen, but I am kind of right here. What could you possibly be thinking about?”

“About how much I like you here.”

She kicked him under the table softly, though he still eeped for the effect. “I like being here with you too, Spen, it’s been fun.”

“And easier, don’t you like being closer to work?”

“Yes, but…”

“And it’s a safer neighborhood.”

“Spen.”

“Morgan had said he found a good townhouse within the same price range as the apartment you’re in not far from here. He’s very particular when it comes to the places he chooses so you know it’s very well maintained.”

“Spensar, we’ve talked about this.”

“I want you to be safe. And not gas yourself.”

“I won’t be doing that again anytime in the future, I promise.”

“Please? Won’t you just look at it?”

He gave her the puppy dog face as she called it, and though her face was angry he knew she was cracking. “Fine, we can look at it, but it doesn’t mean anything, Spen. I like where I am.”

“Just keep an open mind.”

“Hmph.”

He moved his piece. “I just want to know you’re somewhere where we all know you’ll be all right. Not a place where you get asked if you want drugs or a good time when you enter the building.”

“I know you guys don’t think I can take care of myself, but I can, when I need to. Check.”

“I know you can, everyone does, remember we were there when you pinned Morgan down when you two were wrestling. But just because you’re capable doesn’t make you safe. I don’t want you to have to be alone all the time, this way any of us you need can be there. Checkmate.”

He watched Kari study the board trying to find where her tactic failed, and huffed back in her chair. “It’s not fair; I never win anything with you.”

He chuckled, getting up to fix them some tea. He seemed to be taking to the beverage at home more and more. It was soothing and didn’t rev him as much as coffee did. He still fixed it nearly the same, a little more sugar than he was supposed to and a little milk, whereas she was a spoon of Splenda and splash of lemon juice. Sitting it in front of her on the couch she thanked him, as she flipped through the channels. Being Saturday nothing was really on, and they settled on an antique show. It felt so nice today, they should go out in a bit, Kari had already opened his curtains and opened the balcony door to let the cool air circulate through. Which the rabbits had taken to lazing out on. He put his arm around the couch, and she soon settled in the crook of his shoulder. Feeling bolder Spencer let his hand drop to the top of her shoulder, rubbing his thumb in smooth circles, he had felt her seize for a second before relaxing back in his hold.

Maybe he could, just one kiss, to gauge her reaction. As if thinking the same thing she turned her face to him, a rosy flush coming across her cheeks. Letting his other hand come up to cup her cheek, he brushed the hair from her forehead before leaning down. Everything felt like it had went in slow motion as he watched her close her eyes, her lips forming into a light pucker, as he closed his own. He could feel her shaking lightly, as his lips began to gently brush down to hers, and within a hair’s whisper – the phone started ringing.

Wrenching away, Spencer went to search for the phone. “Son of a bitch. Everytime. What?”

He turned back to Kari, as he listened to Morgan talk. The blush was still on her cheeks, but the nervousness appeared to have faded with his outburst. “What are you and little Pixie Stick up to today Pretty Boy?”

“Uh, actually we had been talking about you before.”

“Me, why? Has she finally come to her senses and wanted to get on the Morgan Express?”

Spencer snorted at his friend’s persistent wisecracks. “No, Morgan, she hasn’t, I mean she hasn’t lost any sense in the first place. No, I talked her into looking at that town house and maybe we could see when – hey!”

Feeling something collide with his head, he scooped down to pick up the pillow Kari had flung at him. He turned to her to see a look of amusement and exasperation on her face.

“Well, maybe we can go today, I was able to talk Baby Girl into some four wheeling and barbecuing. That led her to inviting the new girl and everyone else so we kind of figured of making it a team day thing. But we should have time to go look at it before picking her up and pushing off to the woods. I’ve been doing some upgrades to the lights in the kitchen to make it more modern but she can change it out if she doesn’t like the look.”

“I’m not too sure about going off into the woods near Stuarts Draft, there’s been over ten thousand deaths due to ATVs in the last twenty years not to mention that there’s been over one hundred and fifty thousand this year. Plus all the potentials of poison ivy and wildlife…”

“Quit griping, Reid, everyone’s going and who knows you might have fun.”

“Let me ask Kari.”

“Of course, consult the missus.”

“Shut up, Morgan.”

Turning to the couch he saw the curiosity on her face. “Would you want to hang out with the team today?”

She nodded eagerly. “I heard something about four wheeling. I’m up for that.”

Spencer sighed, knowing he wasn’t going to get out of the afternoon. “Yeah, we’ll go.”

“Good. I’ll be down there for you two in half an hour. Wear something besides a sweater vest and loafers, Reid.”

Spencer grumbled his reply before flicking off the phone. Taking the pillow he playfully batted Kari back with it, causing her to giggle with delight. “So what are we doing, Spen?”

“I suppose we change our clothes. I don’t even have something for the outdoors. I don’t think I have enough bug spray either. I’m not looking forward to this.”

“It’ll be okay we can pick some up, and you have some of those shirts I gave you. That should be fine. If we get bit or something there’s always calamine lotion. You never know, you might have fun.”

“The ride itself will be a hundred and sixty-three point three miles.”

She gave him a patient smile. “I’ll look at the house without griping if you try to enjoy yourself.”

Spencer had to work had to refrain from rolling his eyes. “I think having a nicer place is nowhere near as bad as getting eaten alive by insects.”

“You might as make the most of it and get changed. But first-”

He watched her approach him tentatively, before standing on her tiptoes and letting her mouth land lightly on his. His mind was melting, he was trying to process everything that was happening. Letting the eidetic part of his brain take over and commit this to memory to replay over and over. The kiss seemed over before it started, a small motion of lips, and he was reluctantly grateful not knowing how he’d feel or what he’d do if her tongue had touched his lips.

She backed away shyly, tucking a curl behind her ear. “I wanted to do that before another phone call came.”

Spencer looked at her speechless for a moment before smiling. “They do seem to come at the most inopportune times.”

“We might as well get dressed, Professor. I guess I should call the kennels to see if they have room to watch the rabbits for the afternoon.”

He already knew better than to argue, neither would want them to stay in their pen, and the house would be in tatters if they left them out. So he went into the bedroom and rummaged his dresser for one of the t-shirts she had lent him to sleep in. He smiled, he was becoming like her when it came to stealing clothing. Finding the shirt, he found a pair of cords he didn’t mind getting dirty before gathering his Converses.

“You ready?”

[imaginingcriminalminds]

Title: Something Better than Butt-Dialing Author: totalfanfreak Rating: T (one instance of swearing, otherwise K) Prompt/Summary: No summary, oddly I had to update my phone and this got in my head Main Character(s): Spencer Reid/ Reader Trigger Warning: Nope Word Count: 550 Beta/Editor: Me Multishot: Nope Author’s Notes: None Morgan arc spoilers?: Nope

“Ahhhhh!”

“Jesus Y/N, what’s the matter with you?”

“I’m sorry Spence, fuck, I thought you were Hotch.”

“Why would you be afraid of Hotch?”

“My phone’s been messing up and not sending calls, so I thought I’d try to fix it. But I was afraid he’d think I was goofing off if he caught me. I know there are higher priorities right now, but if we had to go out in the field I didn’t want to be out there with a broken phone.”

“I agree you wouldn’t be able to contact someone if you suspected there was danger. So did you fix it?”

“Yes, I think so anyways. Why don’t you give me a call and see if it goes through.”

Spencer tinged red. “I would but I don’t have your number.”

You raised your brows. “You don’t? I’ve been working here for around a month and you don’t have my number?”

Spencer shook his head lightly.

“Give me your phone.”

He didn’t hesitate to hand it over, though he was skeptical of what you were doing. Pushing in your digits in its memory you pushed the device back in his palm.

“Kay, now dial it.”

Pushing the speed dial it was set to, your phone buzzed before it went into the classical Fur Elise by Beethoven.

Spencer cocked his head to the side. “That’s the music you set my number to?”

“Of course, you said you liked to listen to him, this is my favorite song by him. A bit overused I guess, but it reminds me of you.”

“It does?”

“Yes, sweet and sad at the same time. This version is programmed a little different though. A little fine tuning because I think you deserve a pick me up from the sadness.”

With that said, the music continued but with each key became more upbeat rendering into a techno version of the beloved classic.

Spencer laughed. “And that still reminds you of me?”

You giggled. “Sometimes. It does when you smile like that. I like it, and I wish you’d do it more.”

“Thank you, Y/N.”

“For what?”

Spencer shrugged. “For just being…you. I seem to always smile when I’m around you.”

You blushed, leaving his gaze to turn your phone off. Spencer seemed at a loss for what to say next, taking your lack of eye contact for ending the conversation he turned to leave.

“Spence, wait!”

Turning in surprise, you licked your lips before continuing. “You know that number doesn’t just have to be for business or if one of us is in trouble. You could call if you just wanted to talk or, I don’t know, maybe see a movie or get some coffee or something.”

Spencer gave one of his shy side smiles. “Thank you, Y/N. I’ll definitely consider that.”

With that he walked out, and you let out a gust of air you’d been holding you turned to get back to work on the maps, only to hear a ping that indicated you received a text. Picking up the phone you scrolled to the message.

If you’re free after work would you like to get some coffee or see a movie together? 

Smiling at the text, you quickly gave your response.

[imaginingcriminalminds]

The Definitions Between Heroes and Villains - Chapter 6

Title: The Definitions between Heroes and Villains – Chapter 6 Author: totalfanfreak Rating: - Chapter: T+ - Story: Overall M Prompt/Summary: – Chapter Summary: Main Character(s): Spencer Reid/ OC Trigger Warning: - Story: Will be later on - Chapter: Vioence, mental disorders Beta/Editor: Me

Word Count: 6000 Multishot: Yessir [The rest of the chapters can be found via the “Karita” tag. Author’s Notes: I think I am trying harder, I can picture what I want easy in my head but getting it down so everyone else sees what I see is frackin’ hard. Morgan arc spoilers?: Sooner or Later

Opia: The ambiguous intensity of looking someone in the eye, which can feel simultaneously invasive and vulnerable.

“I suppose I should ask who all of you are before I let you in. But I can already take a guess.”

Spencer spoke first. “We work with Kari at the BAU, you’re Bianca, Kari’s sister right?”

“That’s right, glad to know she hasn’t truly forgotten us down here. Come in, I’m afraid she’s in the shower right now, but she’ll be out soon. And food should be on the way.”

They all smiled at the young woman, taking note of the brisk way see talked, staggeringly different from her sister’s blunt accent. Slowly they made their way into the apartment, taking a moment to look around; it was small, but decorated well.

“It’s nice in here.”

Bianca smirked, already putting on a pot of coffee. “Compared to the rest of the building I’d say it is.”

Derek nodded his head in agreement. “Now that you mention it, the building is in need of a few updates to bring it better in code.”

“And here I thought all of you worked for the FBI.”

“We do, but I like to flip houses on the side.”

Bianca nodded, taking mugs from the cabinet. “Sounds like too much work.”

Penelope came up behind her. “Here let us help. How long are you planning on staying in Virginia?”

Bianca had scooted over, letting Penelope take over the cream and sugar part of the coffee. “Just a few days, actually I was sent mainly on a mission. I was coming anyway but I’m supposed to talk Kari into coming back to California.”

Penelope knocked a mug over at that. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay, I got it, and it’s not the one with the flowers on it so Kari won’t mind.”

“You startled me; I thought you said you were here to take Kari away.”

“I, um, kind of did.”

“Oh, but you can’t do that you see WE’RE here to convince her to stay.”

Bianca eyed the perky blonde. “You care about her don’t you?”

JJ stood up. “We all do, we hate to see her go.”

Penelope nodded. “You have to understand, doing what we do, we become close. We’re a family, and I know you’re her family too, but we don’t want her to leave.”

Bianca smiled at the different levels of irony. “Believe me when I say I do understand. But you can relax. I was called and told, since I was coming here regardless, to try and convince Kari into coming home. But I’m not going to make her. If she’s happy with the BAU then I hope she stays. She’s closer to her dad since moving here, she says she’s actually learning new techniques, and then there are all of you. When Kari starts to trust someone they do, in fact, become part of her family. I mean, that’s what happened between us, and I got adopted. But usually it isn’t an easy feat. So I know all of you mean something to her. Yes, her family misses her, I’ve missed her, and will continue to until my move to New York, but she deserves to make this choice herself.”

Derek looked to her. “So you’ll be moving to New York?”

“Yep, put in a transfer, a plus when you work for family.”

Spencer perked at that. “Kari said your aunt was a veterinarian.”

Bianca shrugged. “The one that raised us is, but Coralyne, in New York, manages banks. A lot less glamorous than it sounds.” She stood up on the counter. “Okay, there are cookies, but I don’t know what you guys eat.”

“Oooh what kind are they?”

“Macadamia chocolate chip, but we eat like dietary restricted foods. So there might be kale in it or something. Kari has the worst gut issues so she’s had to eat that way forever. The rest of us more or less transitioned into it, but I don’t know what your opinions are about it.”

Penelope dug her hand in the bag, taking a slight nibble. “They’re not that bad.”

Bianca laughed, taking a few cookies for herself. “They’re an acquired taste for sure, but you get used to eating like that.”

“I don’t know if I’d want to. Oh, by the planet Neptune, what do we have here?”

Everyone’s eyes turned to the scarf that was lying by the window. Bianca’s eyes twinkled at the object.

“I know, she gave that thing away years ago, but lo and behold, poof, out of nowhere. Kari used to wear that it all the time.”

Spencer’s head reared. “How many years is years ago?”

Bianca shrugged. “I’m not sure; she had it when we met though. Her dad gave it to her. He never comes around a lot, especially back then, so it meant a lot to her. She gave it to a guy she met when she went to this demolition thing.”

“Did, she, erm, was she able to talk back then?”

Bianca’s eyes met his. “How…No, we met when we were almost nine; she used sign language or a dry erase board during that time. She wasn’t able to talk properly until she was nearly twelve.”

Penelope sniffled a little. “Wow, that’s not in her file, that she does sign language, yeah, but I had no idea she was mute.”

“She doesn’t like to talk about it, people made fun of her for it all the time; I’m surprised she told you.”

Her gaze was locked on Spencer’s. “She didn’t outright tell me, I kind of figured it out.”

“Could you maybe keep it to yourself? Like I said she doesn’t like people talking about it.”

“I think everyone here will respect that, but thought it’s a rare condition selective mutism isn’t unheard of am –”

Bianca held her hand up laughing. “You are exactly as my sister described.”

Spencer blushed, still reeling from the mass of information dropped on him.

“It’s not a bad thing, she likes it. You talk to her as an equal. Plus she says you’re helping her with learning chess again. Pretty much everyone else who knows how to play has given up on teaching her. I know it means a lot to her that you’re willing to.”

Spencer’s blush increased, him adding in some fidgeting. “It’s nothing; really, she’s actually doing fairly well with it.”

“She says her goal is to beat you.”

Spencer smiled. “I will wish her all the luck with that.”

Hearing the water shutting off, Bianca excused herself. Entering the bathroom she banged on the door, scattering the rabbits that had nested in Kari’s discarded clothing.

“Holy shit, what? There’s money in my bag for the pizza.”

“No, but I will take the money, but some friends of yours have shown up and I didn’t think you’d want them seeing you strutting around naked.”

“Shit, I wasn’t planning on walking around the house naked with you in here anyways, but thank you for the heads up. You didn’t have to scare my bunnies though.”

“They’re fine.”

Karita figured the others had tagged along when Spencer had tried to come here. She was glad to be giving them good news though. She threw on so yoga pants and tank top, opening the door to let the bunnies follow her to go and greet everyone.

“I’m sorry; I would’ve come out sooner but I didn’t know you guys were here.”

Penelope walked over to her, the glee evident in her eyes. “All is forgiven since you brought some bunnlicious in here.”

Derek shook his head in amusement. “Why rabbits?”

Kari shrugged. “The landlord wouldn’t allow dogs, and my beagle Baxter hadn’t been up for a move anyways so I took some rabbits from home. They’re quiet and manageable, not to mention cuddly.”

Penelope scooped up Hatter, allowing March to solo it out on the floor. “So, how’re things?”

“Good. They’ll be even better Pixie Stick, if we know you’re going to be at your desk tomorrow.”

“I guess they’re better then. I talked to my superior, and Strauss and they said I could stay.”

The sounds of cheering bounced off the walls as Kari hugged each of her team. Folding herself back into the chair next to Bianca she collapsed in contentment. Lazing back, she then eyed the near empty bag next to her sister.

“Who said you could eat my cookies?”

“I did, I was being a good host and offering some refreshments. No one but me has the same taste as you though.”

Bianca knew her sister wanted to argue with her, that those specific cookies she hid in the back for a reason. Why couldn’t she have eaten the ones in the other cabinet? She wouldn’t do that with her colleagues there so she was scot free. Of course she’d buy her some more, but it was nice to see her frazzled. Especially since she hadn’t been keeping in touch as she should have been with everyone.

“I didn’t know you had a tattoo.”

The girls both looked over at Spencer, Karita immediately looking down at her bare arms.

“Oh, yeah, I hadn’t really thought about it, I guess, seeing as the department frown on sleeveless attire.”

Penelope squeezed into the loveseat with the two girls. “Would you care if I took a closer look?”

Kari kind of did, but she couldn’t deny her something so simple. So she nodded pulling the thin strap higher to show more of the picture on her shoulder.

“It’s beautiful.”

Kari blushed. “Thank you, Nel.”

Penelope smiled at the new nickname, still admiring the star and rose.

“It’s from the Little Prince, isn’t it?”

Karita looked over at Penelope a smiling coming over her face. “Yeah, how’d you know?”

“I fell in love with that story in my teens I still read it when I need a cry.”

Kari nodded. “My mom read it to my brother and me when we were kids. It always stuck with me too.”

“What does it say? I know it’s French but that’s as far as I’m getting.”

Kari’s blush returned, her peripheral vision turning to Spencer. “I had thought since the book was originally published in French it’d make the most sense the caption is, but it, um, translates to – Forever he will be my rose as I will be his star.”

“Awww that’s sweet.”

JJ sat down on the armrest. “Awfully romantic, was it for someone special?”

Ugh, she hated that word. “Yes, it was. I’d been talking about getting a tattoo for a while to cover up an ugly scar I have on me but I never got around to it. H-he died and I wanted to do something…I wanted to do something so he knew I would always remember him. I had told him of the story too, and he always thought of himself as the rose. He thought I was the one to tame him, even if I never thought of him as vain, but he said, like the rose, he was made unique by someone’s love for them. Though I suppose I could’ve been the prince to the rose, I opted for the star. Like the story, he had said he could look at the stars and be reminded of me, that I would be able to outshine them all.”

The more she spoke the more words tumbled out of her mouth; retreating inside herself Karita knew it was a bad time to wallow.

“I’m so sorry you lost someone that close to you.”

She eyed JJ feeling the woman’s own pain beginning to waft. She must have lost someone close to her too, not a lover, no, a brother or sister, maybe… Karita breath hitched, she had not been able to handle Alden’s death well in any way, but the thought of losing Mikael or any of her family. She would not be able to cope in the world.

“He meant the world to me, he always will. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have room in my heart to grow and keep loving. It took me a while to realize that, but I am better with it now. More than I have ever been actually.”

Karita felt their stares on her, wishing she had not revealed as much in one sitting as she had.

The silence made Bianca suck in a breath. “Well, I think that was a good session, if it’s okay with the rest of you how about you show me somewhere to get some food, because I am literally starving right now.”

Everyone smiled bracing themselves up and preparing to leave.

“Whoa, not you skyscraper.”

Spencer looked down at her confused. “Oh, come on, I’m making the perfect scapegoat here so you two can talk and you’re trying to walk out.”

“No, I wasn’t trying, I thought we were –”

“So you stay I will be back, I might bring food. So, yeah let’s go.”

Penelope refused to let go of the rabbit.

“Stuff him in your purse, darling I’ll bring him back. Let’s give them some space.”

Bianca winked at the two of them before closing up.

“I’m sorry; my sister’s not subtle about anything.”

“That’s okay, I hadn’t meant to bring everyone along, but they wanted to try to encourage you to stay.”

“I’m glad they did, I – I guess I didn’t think it would be that big of a deal to anyone.”

“Of course it was, it is, we all care about you, you know? You’re one of us now.”

Kari smiled looking up at Spencer. “One of you?”

“Yes, you have been for a while, I hope you know that.”

“I didn’t, but I like the sound of it.”

She looked down then, playing with the frayed thread at the end of her top. “I’m sorry if the tattoo makes you uncomfortable. I guess the story behind it I mean. I – I, uh, don’t know what we are Spen or what we will be, and I hope this sounds better than what I’m thinking… But, Alden will always be with me, there are so many things that will keep us together, but, even with that, please know there is room in my heart. That there’s something there and will be.”

“I understand, Kari, I would never take someone who meant so much to you away, I’d never want to take anyone that you care about away. I just hope you have room for me.”

Kari laughed, almost dolefully. “Yes, Spen, I believe there will always be plenty of room for you.”

Spencer motioned forward. “Would it be okay if I hug you?”

Kari grinned. “Of course, Spen, I’m the one that’s supposed to ask you, remember? So I don’t bother you misypophobia? Is that it?”

“Mysophobia, and it’s fine, it only bothers me around people I don’t know.”

But you don’t know me. Kicking the thought aside she let herself shuffle into his arms, easy enveloped by his lanky frame. “I was close.”

“Hmm?”

“To the word, I was close.”

“You were, I like that you listen, it’s nice. Though I don’t know how to feel about you wanting to beat me at chess.”

Karita giggled. “And why not, afraid to share the crown?”

“No, I just hope you know it’s a very small chance you will, and it might be more luck. There’s an infinite number of moves on a chessboard and I’ve slowly been trying to study them, so unless you –”

“I’m not worried about that, whether it is luck or not, I will steal your queen.”

“That’s not the whole purpose of the game, it’s more to find the best strategy –”

“It’s war.”

“It is!”

“I feel sorry for the pawns in the game.”

“I think you’re falling asleep on me.”

“I am not! I’m comfy like this. Like last night, you’re a spooner, Dr. Reid. No wonder Dereek doesn’t like to bunk with you.”

His fingers started to do his nervous tapping motion. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, I’m only letting you know you might not be his type.”

“Could I be yours?”

“Yes, Spen, I think you very much could be. I’ve never had a type before; you’re too wonderful to pass though. Could I be yours? I know we’re kind of different personality and intelligence wise, but maybe –”

“Kari, either one of those matters, I mean it does, I think you’re an amazing person, your personality is one of the things that drew me, your compassion and willing to help people. And you shouldn’t talk about your intelligence; I’ve never believed you can truly measure a person’s intellect. I know you know the world in a different way, and that’s great, to discover things and learn them all the same way we wouldn’t unearth anything.”

She sighed, she could feel he was being genuine, and she let herself sink into him.

“Karita?”

“Hmmm?”

“What are we now?”

A very loaded question, Spen. “I know you mean something different to me, a good something. But what we are and what to do about it are out of my comprehension entirely.”

“I know what you mean. I’m not asking for this to be an outright romance overnight, but I would like to know that you’re going to be here.”

“I am, Spen.”

“Good.”

“I know one of your secrets, Karita.”

She stiffened tremendously. “What?”

“The scarf, you gave it to me. You were the one to save me.”

Her stomach eased a little. “I didn’t save you, Spen, I just wanted to help you. You sounded so sad.”

“You did, more ways than you know.”

After a moment they pulled apart, the sound of knocking startling them. After giving the delivery guy money, Karita got some plates to dive into the meal. Spencer had already grabbed a slice of pizza and appearing to be analyzing the contents.

“I could make you something else if you like.”

“Oh no it’s fine; I’ve just never had a pizza made like this before. Um, what’s the crust made of, it kind of looks like walnuts in it?”

“It’s made of quinoa, flaxseed, and cauliflower.”

Karita couldn’t help but to laugh at the look of distaste Spencer was trying to hide. She patted his knee going back to the phone. “I will eat this, and we’ll order you, a pepperoni?”

“Pepperoni, olive, and sausage if that’s okay.”

“That’s fine, it’ll probably be here in the next thirty minutes or so it says. I could make you something else until then.”

The smile that sprung on Spencer’s face was precious. “No, that’s okay, you should probably eat something though, and maybe we could watch something together. I think there’s a Doctor Who marathon on BBC.”

Kari picked up the abandoned slice, letting the flaky crust linger on her tongue. Finishing the bite she looked at him. “What’s that about?”

Spencer looked like he had been shot. He had jumped back, his forehead creasing, as he took a sharp breath. “You don’t know what Doctor Who’s about?”

Kari shrugged innocently, not understanding the big deal. “I’ve never heard of it before. I know you like Star Trek and I’ve heard of that, is it the same?”

Spencer leaned forward, cutting the air with his hands. “No, not really, no. It does have classifications of aliens in it and the character of the Doctor is one, but it’s mainly about time travel, and –”

Spencer spun into all the missing serials and backstories of the characters. Apparently there had been ten Doctors thus far, and his main goal was to travel with a Companion to study the world without interfering in it. Spencer had been so worked up with his explaining that time was able to pass much more quickly. The pizza was delivered and they were both able to dig into their food as Spencer brought up the show, allowing her to see what he was talking about. She still put up a fuss about it being out of order, Karita preferred to watch a tv show in the order it was made, and though Spencer explained the episodes didn’t necessarily need to be in order. Karita only partially complied saying she would have to look up the first season later.

At around midnight, Karita began to worry about her sister, texting to make sure she was okay. It appeared her sister was having a good time with the team, after figuring out why Bianca wouldn’t bat a lash at his flirting they started wing manning each other and scoping out the girls. Bianca even sending her a picture of a woman’s prominent chest.

Sorry you missed these, I know you like to scope out the chesticles.

Well, at least she was getting along with everyone. Looking over she saw Spencer yawning, and she had to fight off one of her own.

“Maybe we should turn in.”

Spencer looked at her cautiously. “Yes, I think I’d like that.”

She gave him some more of her hoarded clothing to change into while she was satisfied in sleeping in her loungewear. Unknotting her hair she let it fall into a mass that tickled the end of her back.

“You should wear it down more.”

Karita squeaked in surprise at Spencer’s entry, making him chuckle in response. “And here I thought I was the skittish one.”

Coming up behind her Spencer delicately let his hand touch the long locks. “Is it rude if I ask what your original color is?”

Karita eyed him from her mirror. “Just brown, like my brother’s, and our mother’s.”

“Why do you dye it, I mean, I do pay attention, I know Garcia dyes her all the time and even JJ does but acts much more discreet about it. But why? I bet your hair’s beautiful the way it is. There is psychology involved in it, which it can work therapeutically, like a caterpillar emerging from a cocoon. That it makes the person dying their hair feel more like who they’re truly meant to be. I just don’t see it.”

Karita smoothed down the frizzy ends her comfort ebbing away. “My mom used to dye it all the time when I was little. I guess in a way that’s an easy part of her I could keep.”

“Why would your mom do that?”

“You know, Spen. I don’t think either of us had the picturesque childhood. My mom thought bad people were looking for us, me in particular, since she never changed hers or Mikael’s appearance. But we hid and she tried to make me look different so they wouldn’t take me away.”

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have pried.”

“It’s okay; I think…I think you may be one of the few people who can understand.”

“I do, my mom had been sick even before I was born. It wasn’t until much later she was diagnosed with schizophrenia.”

“It makes it harder and easier when there’s a name attached to it doesn’t it?”

“Yes, harder that you know something is wrong and easier because you think you can find a solution.”

“Exactly…my mother’s was trauma-induced psychosis. I think I should mention she worked in this line of work.”

“She was in the FBI?”

“No, no, though that was how she met my father, no, she worked for the ATSDR, and was tranferred to another department for some of her research.

“At least now I know why you entered this field, it appears to be in your blood.”

“Yeah, you could definitely say that.”

They crawled under the covers and for a little while longer before they both were making incoherent words both dozing into slumber.

It was autumn and the sun was hitting the trees just right able to waft the fragrance from the cedar trees. It was still warm, though the dress her mother had made her wear was very itchy. She was waiting for her brother, he was the only one allowed to leave the cabin and she often waited to hear every detail of his visit to the town.

“Anna! Anna, where are you, meine süße?”

It was whispered, her mother believed in whispers, she believed in silence. Teaching her and her brother to talk with their hands and not with mouths, no one would find them if they stayed low and quiet.

She tiptoed her way back over, the leaves crunching beneath her filled socks. She made her way to the back of the house. She had already become fluent in words with her hands and she greeted her mother accordingly. The older woman chuckled, making Anna smile. It was a good day, whenever her mother would smile or laugh Anna knew she was here with them and not in the other place. She didn’t like when her mother went away, the mother that replaced her wasn’t right. She did not speak to them in whispers or prepare their food or sing them lullabies, no the other mother stayed in the basement often muttering bad things to herself and giving them awful tasting medicines when she was upstairs.

“Where did you go, my little Annie?”

Her hands twisted in response. “I am waiting for brother to come home.”

“He will be home soon, you know it takes him a little while to get the groceries and things we need.”

“I know momma. Momma, could I go with him one day?”

“Yes, of course, one day soon, but not yet. It is still unsafe for you.”

“Why, momma? Why me and not him?”

“You are both special, but you have potential bubbling inside of you, and these people want it. I want you to be strong, my love, to fight back.”

“I don’t wish to fight.”

“I know, I do not either, but sometimes there is no other way. Your brother already sees that.”

There was crunching behind and Anna whirled, startled and scared. But it was only brother, brother who promised to protect them both forever and ever. She sent her happiness through him, glad for his return, and he grinned the feeling echoing through each of them. She was allowed to help unload the bags, mother saying they would make cookies later. Anna liked the peanut butter ones; her mother letting her put her thumb in the sticky dough before putting them in the fire lit oven.

She wandered back outside the sweet scent lingering on her dress, as she watched her brother looking at the lowering sun.

“What is the matter?”

“Nothing, Annie, nothing.”

“You are worried.”

“No, I’m not, you’re looking too deeply, and you shouldn’t do that.”

“I can’t you know that, I only see what you’re showing on the outside, and you are scared and worried. What’s wrong?”

Her brother didn’t say anything else, blocking his thoughts from her. Their mother soon ushered them in to eat, hurrying to clean up before the sun was gone and they would have no light. Letting them change into their nightclothes and brushing their teeth, their mother tucked them in. Winding up an old record player she sung to them, she said her mother sung it to her as a child, and they would sing it to their children. Anna giggled, she could not see herself as a mother. Not like her mother. She kissed their noses.

“Sleep well, lieben.”

They did until a crash from outside their room was heard. Anna jumped, her chest wanting to cry out at the disturbance, it had to be momma. She rolled out of bed and tried to wake her brother, only to find his bed was nothing but empty sheets. Wandering out to the dark hallway, she tried to feel around her surroundings. She made her way to the kitchen, hoping the sliver of moonlight would help her see. Turning she saw something moving in the dining room.

“Annie.”

“Momma!”

Careening over, she fell next to her mother. Now she could see the stain on her nightgown, the pristine white weeping red from her stomach.

“Run, Annie! Find your brother and run!”

Doing as told she fled, stumbling into the woods and trying to call out to her brother the only way she could.

Karita jerked awake, that was not a memory she wanted to relive, kicking the blanket off she looked over and saw Spencer still sleeping. She was glad she knew he hardly ever slept. He looked so peaceful, his face completely unmarred by everything. She hoped he was dreaming of something good. Peeling herself off the bed she went into the kitchen, Hatter twitching at the end of the bed before deciding to join her. She turned the coffee pot on, and decided to make pancakes for breakfast. Going over to her guest room/office she checked to see if her sister made it in.

She was splayed out on the little day bed, her dark hair falling into her face. “What are you looking at?”

“Jesus, Bi, I was just seeing if you made it from your little escapade last night.”

“My escapade went fine thank you, we all danced and ate, and drank, God we drank. I had to have had nine Kamikazes. My plane has went into a tailspin and crashed.”

“How about some tea for us then, I’m making pancakes.”

“Sounds good, I need something starchy to soak up whatever’s in my stomach.”

Pulling hair from her mouth Bianca sat up and stretched. “I’ll meet you in there, I might not be much help or company but I’ll be present.”

Karita laughed, making her way quietly back to the kitchen. The coffee pot beeped that it was finished, and she poured a cup for Spencer carefully sitting beside his bed so he’d find it. She didn’t know if he’d wake soon or not, but she wanted him to know she thought of him. It was still too early to be up, the sun barely coming into a red haze from the navy blue.

Prepping up the batter, she decided to make two kinds since the pizza hadn’t gone over too well with Spencer. Hearing a flop at the counter she assumed it was her sister.

“You want blueberries in yours?”

“Mmm-hmm.”

“Here’s your tea.”

“This isn’t the kind that will have me puking everywhere is it?”

“No, it’s regular black tea with some green tea brewed with it.”

Putting the pancakes on the platter she put them on the island making a few more and starting to clean up some of the mess. Sitting in front of her sister, she saw the accusatory smile on Bianca’s face even with the hangover plastered in. God, what was she expecting to have happened?

Upon waking Spencer realized his eyes were open yet he couldn’t see. Was it a blindfold? He nearly panicked, but stopped when he figured out his blindfold was breathing. Moving his hands to his face he removed the fuzzy obstruction.

“March, why would you do that?”

The white rabbit’s answer was to unhinge his jaw into a yawn. Spencer chuckled, letting his hand hesistantly run over the soft fur. He was prepared for a bite, perhaps for March to at least run away, but the rabbit began clicking his teeth together. It left Spencer in awe, he had begun reading on rabbits yesterday when he had took lunch and he knew this was chittering, a rabbit’s purr. March was content around him. He had slept through the night again, and seeing the empty space beside him he knew his new bed mate had risen before him. He spotted a mug on one of the end tables, with a post it saying, ‘drink me.’ Smiling he took a sip, coffee, a little cold but with the perfect amount of sugar to suit his taste.

“Where’d she go March?”

The rabbit only blinked at him, but an answer came outside the door. The sound of girls giggling filling the empty spaces. Walking out he saw Bianca on one of the stools. Kari leaned on the other side of the island, Hatter sat in the middle of the living room, a berry in his mouth. March had made his way over to his companion trying to sneak a little nibble of his snack, giving him a growl that Spencer wouldn’t think the small creature was capable of. It sounded like a snotty snort but Spencer knew it was an act of aggression. Hatter wrenched away with his snack galloping to escape on top of the ottoman.

“March it’s too early to be greedy, come here and get your own.”

Hearing his name called, March’s ears perked, and made his way into the kitchen.

“Good morning, professor.”

The greeting had come from Bianca, and he tried his best to get over the nerves he had at the young woman’s newness and greet her too.

“Good morning to you t-too.”

Bianca smiled, patting the seat next to her, and Spencer made his limbs cooperate and sit down in the offered chair. He was rewards by a warm smile and a stack of pancakes from Karita. He took note that his looked a good deal different from theirs and hated that she went through more trouble at making sure he was happy.

“Professor, I like that, could I call you that, Spensar?”

Licking his lips, he made use of his fidgeting and grabbed the syrup that was offered. “If you want to, Im not really a teacher you know.”

“You give lectures a lot and you teach me new things all the time.”

“I take it since you’re still here things went well last night.”

Kari had moved back over to the stove, but Spencer could still see the hints of a smile and the flush coming up her neck.

“Oh, I’ve already grilled her, I’m asking you.”

“With that technique, you could be an interrogator.”

Bianca grinned. “I could, answer the question.”

“Things went very well last night.”

“Whoa, you two have got to quit giving so much TMI.”

“TMI?”

Kari had come back over with a pitcher of orange juice in hand. “Too much information, Spen, sarcastic wit and irony are Bi’s specialty.”

Spencer held in a snort, filling his mouth with the sweet, fluffy goodness to refrain from laughing as Bianca got up.

“I’m going to get dressed, let you two say good morning since you’re both being so chatty. Just don’t forget your meds before we leave alright.”

Spencer looked between the two women, unsure of what to ask first. From the anger on Kari’s face he wasn’t sure he should ask. Luckily, Kari was willing to answer one of them.

“I talked to Gideon and Hoss this morning, and they’re going to let me take the day off since I wasn’t planned on being in anyways. I thought I’d go with Bi and help her look at apartments. I’ll be back on BAU time tomorrow. This gives you guys time to get to know the new girl.”

Spencer smirked. “You’re sounding jealous.”

Karita shrugged. “Maybe I am. This is new to me. Maybe I’m afraid she’ll be better at this and you guys won’t need me. I’m not sure how all to describe it.”

“I promise you, Karita, you’re just as qualified as she is.”

“Doubtful, but how much do you know about her?”

“Nothing besides her name, but I know you, and I say you’re qualified.”

She smiled tenderly at him, leaning over the island to kiss his cheek. Moving to the corner cabinet he saw different medicine bottles inside, one being something like a liquid sweetener bottle with a prescription label on it. He watched her squirt it into her orange juice, causing the light orange liquid to turn into a sunset color, the red hues from the medicine still swirling in the glass.

“Are you sick?”

She looked blankly at the glass before answering. “No, not really. I see this as mainly a super vitamin, my system is very wonky and it’s hard to keep all the vitamins I need from eating and supplements. This just ensures I get them all.”

“Bianca said you had to watch what you eat all the time.”

“Yeah, we all do on some level, but me more so I guess. It can get old sometimes but I’m used to it.”

“Ready to go?”

The two turned to Bianca before looking down at their pajamas. Getting dressed the girls drove Spencer to work since he had ridden with Derek yesterday. They both waved enthusiastically to him as he entered the building.

“I wish you hadn’t mentioned the meds, Bi, he didn’t need to know that.”

“If you two are going to be a thing, you need to start transitioning him. He can’t be left completely alone in the dark about things, damn, don’t you think he’s going to wonder why you have a cabinet full of drugs if he sneaks around one night for a midnight snack? Besides, you deserved it, don’t think aunt Coralyne forgot to mention you not showing up to check your levels this month. That was part of the deal to make sure the job wasn’t fucking with you.”

“I hate doctors.”

“I know, but Stiever down there is more a mad scientist than an actual doctor.”

“Wow, that’s a vast improvement.”

“Shut up and get to driving.”

“I do need to talk to Coralyne about the new woman at work though. I meant to yesterday, but trying to figure out a way to stay kind of made everything else go over my head.”

“Were you that worried about leaving lover boy?”

“So funny, no. I think she works with Interpol. And I think she was part of the group that investigated everything when Alden was killed.”

[imaginingcriminalminds]

Title: The Definitions between Heroes and Villain – Chapter 5 Author: totalfanfreak Rating: - Chapter: T - Story: M Prompt/Summary: – Chapter Summary: Karita tries to make a decision to stay or go as she receives a surprise visitor Main Character(s): Spencer Reid/ OC Trigger Warning: - Story: Oh, yeah - Chapter: Mentions of death of loved ones, maybe emotional coping Word Count: 4500 Beta/Editor: Me Multishot:Yeppers Author’s Notes: OMG, first descriptive problems and then I realize I spelt Greenaway’s name wrong…There’s also a character list on my page with what I imagine the characters to look like Morgan arc spoilers?: Very far away from now

Kreng-jai: A Thai word that directly translates as “awe heart” or “deferential heart.” It sort of means “consideration,” but often is used to reference the deference you might to someone else’s needs even at the expense of your own.

After entering the bullpen, Karita had separated from Spencer, heading for the coffee maker. She was relieved that she had, striding across the bullpen with Hotch she caught sight of a woman, a familiar one. Watching as they talked to Spencer, Karita couldn’t help but wonder why the dark-haired woman was here. She worked with Interpol, Karita recalled. Was she in trouble? Were they checking up on her to see she was doing her job? But that couldn’t be right; being international it wouldn’t be in Interpol’s jurisdiction to reprimand her. Karita needed to talk to Strauss. Ducking out of the room, she walked as quickly as she could to the office. Not bothering to knock as she went in the room.

Strauss looked aghast at her entry. “Karita, what in the name of God do you think you’re doing in –“

“Do you know about the woman from Interpol?”

Strauss looked at her in bewilderment. “Yes, I’m the one who requested her.”

“What do you mean you requested her?”

“To replace Greenaway, so you can go back to your team.”

Karita ran a hand through her hair before collapsing in the nearby chair. “So she’s not here because of me…”

“Well, not directly, she had put in a request for enrollment in the BAU several months ago and her resume seemed more than enough to let her join.”

Karita’s heart sunk slightly, so it was over, it’s how it was supposed to be. She knew that. This wasn’t her sector; she didn’t belong here with these people. She needed to be with her family. She wanted to be with her family, but she wanted to be here as well. After all, her father was here, and the two of them were finally repairing their relationship from everything that happened. She had thought he was accepting her. And Spencer…

“Karita?”

She left her daze and glanced up at Strauss.

“I’ve been talking to Gideon about this and we would like to have you as a regular fixture here.”

“My father said that?”

Strauss pursed her lips, and Karita knew she had slipped.

“Yes, he has been reporting to me your progress. You’ve been working well with the other members of the team, you’re able to be compassionate on the job but able to keep sight of the job, and you’ve been contributing your insights of the cases that tend to work beneficially. I’d say you’d be a great asset, and…and I know your father’s proud of you in this.”

Karita smiled, having the words course through her. Proud, plenty of family has been proud of her, but this was something more. Maybe it was because deep down every child wanted to make their birth parents happy. And now she finally got one, even if it would be nicer coming from him.

 She realized she had no idea what she wanted. “May I have time? I’d like to perhaps go and talk to my aunt about this. It probably wouldn’t take a day to do it.”

“By all means, but remember there is a place for you here.”

Karita nodded, curtly, letting her mind ponder on her options. She made her way back to the bullpen and told Hotch and Gideon what she was going to do. She wanted to talk to her father alone, but with the new case coming in that wasn’t going to happen.

“Karita?”

She looked at Spencer, the weight in her chest expanding. The sadness that ran across his features hurt, she felt like she had cut him.

“Where are you going?”

She gave a faint smile. “I think we both know what’s happening, Spen. I need to leave for the day to go talk to my superiors in the New York office. Honestly, I have no idea what I’m doing.”

“You could stay.”

“Yes, but…”

“But? Don’t you want to stay here?”

“Yes, but I also want to help my other team too. Would you want to completely leave your old life behind you?”

Spencer shrugged meekly, avoiding her eyes. “Sometimes.”

The weight in her chest hit like a boulder in the sea. “Even if that meant the good too?”

He didn’t answer, continuing to look down at his loafers. She slowly approached him, like a spooked animal. She wanted to touch him, but with the alcohol out of his system she wasn’t sure how he’d like it.

“Spen? Let me hug you, please.”

“I don’t want…this can’t be a goodbye, Karita.”

“It’s not, not really, but I want to touch you, only if you give me permission to. I know you don’t like it sometimes.”

He made no attempt to move, his only reply was to chew on his lip, and Karita made her way over to him. She let her hand rest on the lapels of his tweed jacket, with her biting her own lip and trying to regain her breath. She let her hand wander inside the jacket, running over his dress shirt.

The ones from last night, before she had washed them she had caught his scent in them, and though she smelled her fabric softener in them now his underlying essence was coming through. It smelt like spearmint, patchouli, coffee, and hand-crafted paper. It was etched into him. She had finally gotten her arms around his waist, allowing her head to lie on his chest – her ear right at his heartbeat. All of this was new to her, she had touched her love, but intimacy of either the emotional or physical wasn’t really their forte. Yet this, this seemed to be both.

She sighed, feeling Spencer’s hands glide across her own waist. That was when she felt it, a cracking, it almost made her collapse. Karita never expected something like this to happen; she had been contented with being alone, her life partner waiting in some other beyond for her return. But though it was unintentional, Spencer hadn’t played fair. From the beginning she had sensed his goodness, something so rare and beautiful that she hadn’t believed it to be real at first. But eventually, with much reluctance, she had. And she craved it, wanting something so pure in her life. It wasn’t fair to him though, this…infatuation with her would end soon and through the haze he’d see her for what she was.

The cracking spread through her, shattering her in a million shards. She wept silently, but he knew, and his arms pulled her more tightly to him.

“Can you feel it, too? You’re the perfect fit.”

She laughed, the sudden burst causing a clogging sound from the tears. She was far from being the perfect anything, but she could feel it. She felt something, not wanting to move from this spot. She pulled back a little bit, Spencer’s fingers tracing the outline of her face.

“You deserve so much better from this world, Spen.”

He narrowed his eyes in confusion. “From where I’m at, there doesn’t seem much better in this world than you.”

She sobbed again, the shards of her falling to the floor. “I keep trying to tell you, you wouldn’t like me if you knew me. You’re only seeing a small frame of me, I’m weird, different. I’m not smart, I’m not athletic, I can’t…I’m not…”

“Shouldn’t I have a little bit of say in this? Let me know you, what you’re willing to give to me.”

Karita looked around in horror, realizing where they really were. “We shouldn’t talk about this here.”

“What? Why? No one’s out here. Please?”

“Maybe tonight, if that will be okay. I’m emotional, and not thinking right and I must get to New York today.”

“I could go with you.”

Oh, that would only create more problems, many branches didn’t bother to go to that department, and the fact she’d be bringing him in, and well…it wouldn’t be pretty.

He held her there though as if he were committing her to his memory. And for a moment she actually tried to see herself through his eyes. Her white and silver hair too long and unkempt to keep down held in its regular knot, eyes that were like silver with pieces of her mom’s blue showing through the gray, pale as a damn snowdrift that bruised and burned easily, not to mention she only came up to his chest made her rather more unsure of what he saw.

“Um, Spence, we’re waiting on you in the round room.”

He licked his lips, his eyes never wavering as he answered. “Thank you, JJ, I’ll be right there.”

Not bothering to look away either, Karita knew the room was cleared with the clip clop of JJ’s heels clicking away. Seemed the secret was out now, and they hadn’t even started anything yet.

“I guess I’ll be meeting you tonight then.”

She nodded. “You have to let me go first, Spen.”

He shook his head, morosely. “I’m not a rash person, Kari.”

“I know.”

“I like order and routine, I like to have a vantage point, anything social scares me. But this, with you, I want to try, please know that, what I’m feeling…I can’t explain it, maybe it’s rushed to you but I –“

“I know, in my own way, I know. It hit like a tornado.”

“I do see what you mean, but tornadoes can be detected, and can usually pinpoint its location. Perhaps lightning would be better, there’s sometimes an event called ‘bolt from the blue’ that can occur where the back of the thundercloud can emit lightning sometimes as far as twenty-five miles away from the actual storm so it’s more accurate as to not seeing something…coming.”

The look on her face stopped him. A mixture of amusement and glum.

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be, I like your rambles.”

“You’re one of the few.”

He stepped away from her, turning to his messenger bag. “Here take this with you, you know, in case something happens and you decide not to come back.”

The purple scarf. “I’m not taking that Spen; I’ll be seeing you later.”

“Then you can give it to me then. Please, this scarf means a lot to me, and it’d mean more to me if you’d hold onto it for today.”

She took it from him gingerly, the soft fleecy fabric light in her hands. “You know it’s like ninety degrees out.”

He shrugged. “Be like me when it gets too hot; just carry it for good luck.”

Cradling it under her arm she reached up and pecked his cheek before reluctantly leaving.

A little over an hour later and she was in the bustle of New York, she had moment where she loved the city. But today it was overwhelming the towers leering over her, traffic congestion pounding into her head, and too many people on the sidewalks were making her lose it. She went as fast as she could to the office, approaching the building she walked in letting the quiet and cool air calm her.

“Welcome to NASIC Savings and Loans, how may I help you?”

She couldn’t remember the receptionist’s name but Karita knew her face so she flashed her office ID.

“This is a bank now?”

The woman scanned her badge before nodding. “The dry cleaning service went downhill fast last quarter. So the head turned it into a bank, there’s usually one on every block anyways…and churches.”

“You sound like Teagan.”

The young girl looked appalled. “Please don’t compare me to her. I might be sarcastic but I’m not bat shit crazy.”

The receptionist printed her visitor’s badge, and she quickly went back to her typing, the barb obviously hitting too deeply as Karita entered the elevator.

While the downstairs gave off the air of sterile luxury with high sloping ceilings, marble pillars and floors, the upstairs was much lower key. It reminded her of a model home, beautiful, but having the potential to be lived in. Most of the floors were dark hardwood, the walls painted dark colors of eggplant, sea green, and burgundy. And the floor was bustling; she scooted past her peers, getting a few waves and smiles as she passed to get to the center office.

She reached for the doorknob to find it locked. Looking over Karita spotted Teagan DuPonte filing away on her nails. She, herself had nothing against Teagan, whenever she came to the New York office Teagan seemed to be okay. Yeah, she was crazy, in every sense possible. Yet every single person that worked here was mentally damaged in some way. Sure, Teagan fought with anyone who pissed her off, and liked to set fires, and huff paint. As long as she had her meds she was usually fine. And she was useful, her gift being that of visions of the present, like how Karita did with her brother Teagan’s eyes would randomly see through someone else’s. It came in handy sometimes, though it left her unstable, unsure of who she was, hence the need to huff paint and other vices.

The young red-head eyeballed her as she approached. “Hey Kari.”

“Hi, Teagan, could you buzz me into Coralyne’s office, please?”

“She told me to not let anyone in there today, according to her none of us are worth a damn and lucky we haven’t all died by terrorists.”

Yep, sounded like her aunt, always hell bent on the extreme. “Is there any way there could be an exception? I have to leave before the end of the day.”

With her nails done, Teagan had started to braid her hair, with one hand she continued the task while the other typed in something on the computer.

“Nu-uh, it says here you’re scheduled back here, that you’re leave is over starting at midnight. They’ll send you to wherever after that.”

“That’s what I need to talk to her about.”

Teagan looked at her incredulously, as if she wanted her to unhinge the door. “I’ve already gotten yelled at twice this morning by her, I don’t need any more crap today.”

Karita knew she wasn’t getting anywhere and she only had a few hours before the flight back was scheduled for the day. She knew Teagan wouldn’t give a damn if she got herself in trouble and digging through the her bag she decided to old school it and pick the lock with one of her bobby pins. It was a good talent to have and each woman in her family knew how to do it. A spin of the lock, listening for the twists and line-ups of metal inside, and eventually the click of triumph.

“Who the hell is messing with my door, I’ll have you know I can transfer you in a -”

Wrenching the door open Coralyne looked down at her niece with a mixture of annoyance and rage.

“What do you think you’re doing, missy?”

“Coming in to talk to you. I didn’t know I had to pull a heist just to talk to you.”

“Don’t be smart. If you’re going to talk get in here. I have a horrible migraine and need silence so I’d prefer it if you’d hurry for now.”

“It’s good to see you too.”

Aunt Lyne’s eyes flared; luckily Kari had become immune to the heat years ago. She hadn’t changed at all since Karita’s last visit. She had been letting her auburn hair grow out longer, but the prominent cheekbones, clipped accent that blatantly ran through the family, harsh ice blue eyes, and dark circles under them remained the same.

“What do you need to discuss with me so badly, that it couldn’t wait until tomorrow?”

Crossing the room, Karita sat one of the chairs, holding her hands in her lap nervously.

“I wanted to see if –“

“If what? Quit stammering, and say it.”

“I want to stay at the BAU.”

Whatever Coralyne was expecting, that had to be at the bottom of the list. “What do you mean, ‘stay there’? You can’t stay there; it isn’t your place or position.”

“I know that’s why I wanted to see if you could make it my position.”

Coralyne idled, momentarily speechless, her eyes calculating her niece’s question. “I’m not sure why you want that, or what purpose it could possibly serve, but I do know that it wouldn’t work out. There’s no one there to protect you properly –“

“I can protect myself.”

Coralyne hissed through her teeth at the interruption. “You won’t be able to if you’re working one of their jobs and a rogue from a case here attacks you. How are you supposed to know what to look out for? This isn’t just about what headquarters wants, Karita, this is about keeping all of you safe.”

“I know, and I thank you –“

“I happened to get a call the other day from your brother; he told me you blocked him out when you raised a distress signal. Why was that?”

“It was more of personal distress.”

“And what the hell does that mean?”

Karita shrugged, the scrutiny disabling her. “A lot, someone there was able to look up about mom, you know, when she was put away. Then a man I work with recalled me from a long time ago. It was staggering to me I guess and I panicked inwardly, I guess.”

Coralyne’s stare thaw but her lips tightened slightly. “A man, huh, and he knows you?”

“It was when I was a kid, like ten or something, okay? We helped him and he remembered, not too sure if he completely pieced it together but he said I remember him of the girl that helped him. That I look like her.”

“And do you not think that is dangerous? And you said we…”

Karita flopped back in her chair, exasperated. “Because Mikael was there! Besides why would it be dangerous? We were all kids, you know Mikael was cautious even back then we were just helping someone.”

“Hmmm. I might not have any gifts like the rest of you, but I can tell there’s more to all this man what you’re saying. And to let you know, as your aunt, I don’t think you’re ready for it, Karita.”

Karita wasn’t sure if she meant the job or the man, but she agreed on some level to both. She had no idea where things were heading with Spencer but she knew they wouldn’t get far. With what was and what she did, it’d be better that way.

“Honey, I don’t think I can let you do it, you know you don’t belong there, don’t you? Our superiors will tell you that.”

Coralyne sat back in her chair, templing her fingers together in contemplation. “These…unsubs, they chase, they have no connections to you. Yes, you feel something for the victims as you always do, but wouldn’t you rather catch the people who hurt you? Try to stop them and keep them from taking and hurting other children like you?”

Karita rubbed her eyes, trying to get the prickling to stop. “I don’t want any of this anymore, I don’t want revenge, and I’m tired of looking at it. I didn’t want this life, here or there. I want to be able to make my own decisions. I want…”

I want to move on.

Coralyne’s face softened. “I know, believe me, I do know. But this is our curse, Karita, look at our history, this is what our family has had to do. Anything to survive and this is out of my hands. This is why I decided to be in this, and the only things I can do for all of you are to give you the tools you need –“

“And keep us together, I know, and I thank you so much for that.”

Coralyne sighed loudly, throwing her head back, before getting up. “Look, maybe I can find some way to let you stay down there. You take on the jobs that I need you to, and you can go about with whatever you’re doing in Virginia.”

“Really?”

“Yes, I can think of something to tell everyone.”

Leaping from her seat, Karita lunged into an embrace with the older woman, startling her. “Okay, okay, get off me please. I’ll do things through headquarters, but you’re going to have to think of your own explanation to the family, I already know Cordelia was planning some kind of party for when you got back.”

The smile fell, knowing she was going to disappoint her family in not returning now. She’d figure this out, it wasn’t forever it was only for a little while longer. If it got too hard or complicated there would always be a way to pull out, right? Hugging her aunt one more time, to the older woman’s reluctance, she headed out.

“And Karita?”

“Yes?”

“Believe or not, I do want you to be happy, so good luck at this finding yourself.”

“I know and thank you. I’ll need it.”

“And don’t be surprised if you have a package at your door.”

“A package?”

“Eh, you’ll see, now go, the left side of my head is pounding again.”

Heading back home, she was tired, and confused there was no package when she went to the door to look for her keys. Digging through her bag she fell backwards when her door opened.

“Hey, Kari.”

Looking up she was amazed to see her sister inside her apartment. “Bi? What are you doing here?”

“Aunt Lyne called.”

Karita rubbed a hand on her forehead. “Oh my God.”

“I know right? She was telling me this crazy shit about you not coming back to California; that you wanted to stay here in this little shoebox. Why wouldn’t you buy a bigger place by the way, it’s not like you can’t afford it.”

“I wanted to budget in case the job didn’t leave enough to send to aunt Cory and the clinic.”

“Yes, because it’ll run out pretty quick right?”

It was sarcasm, Bianca was good at it. “To me it would be, and this place functions fine. Where are my rabbits?”

“Calm down they’re here, I let them out of their pen to run around. You do that right?”

“Yeah, move so I can get in.”

“Rude, but fine. So…you going to tell me why you’ve decided to stay here, you tired of us?”

“You know that’s not it.”

“Then what is it?”

“I want to do something for me, to make my own decisions for something. I’m finally talking to my dad, Bi, actually getting to know him. I feel we’re getting where I can ask him about mom. I want to know how they met, when they fell in love. I want…”

She stopped, shame returning to her.

“What’s the matter, Kari?”

Karita looked over and stared at her sister’s dark eyes and the sympathy they held. Shrugging she sat on the loveseat with her. “I met this guy.”

Bianca’s eyes perked and she smiled. “A guy you say? And here I thought you would come to my side sooner or later.”

Karita laughed. “Afraid not.”

“So what’s bad about the guy?”

“Nothing, it’s me.”

“You?”

“Yeah! We’re not…normal, Bi. And what about Alden? I keep wondering what he’d think about this.”

Putting an arm around her shoulder, her sister nestled in next to her. “I think he’d be happy that you’re moving on, that he’d want you to find someone to take care of you, one that you could care for in return. That he wouldn’t want you to be lonely.”

“”Do you really believe that?”

“I do, and as far as the other stuff goes down the road if he really loves you and I mean REALLY, then tell him. Tell him everything you want to, he should be able to accept everything.”

“Maybe.”

“So is that why you want to stay, this guy?”

“His name’s Spencer, and maybe partly. What we do, we just eliminate the problem, and we don’t even treat the people we’re after as human. And they are, even if they have lost their way they were someone’s child once, and they were hurt just like us. But there it’s just to catch, not to kill and though it still can be gory and violent, it’s not as much. I don’t know, for some reason it feels like I’m helping more. I know we do what we have to do, that there’s no way to really reverse it or keep the ones we chase into rehab or whatever but it feels neverendingly hopeless.”

“Yeah, I can see what you mean.”

“And it’s not forever; I’ll be home sooner or later. And I still have to take on some cases in New York.”

“Cool, maybe I can get assigned there and we can partner up. If Mikael hasn’t beaten me to it.”

“Does he know?”

“If not through you, aunt Lyne probably spilled to him.”

“How’d you even get here so quick?”

“I was technically in New York, I was going to surprise you regardless, but aunt Lyne called telling me to try and talk you into going home. In case you really weren’t sure you wanted to stay here.”

“Of course she did.”

“So the way I see it, we order pizza, and we’ll say I tried.”

“Yeah, I like that idea. You can order, I’ll pay, and take a shower. Then maybe you can catch me up on home while we eat.”

“Excellent.”

                                                                                                                                                            “Where you headed, Pretty Boy?”

Spencer jumped at the voice, since the case hadn’t required any physical involvement, only the profile, they had been free to stay at the office. Finally free of paperwork, Spencer was bolting to get to Karita’s apartment, to see what she decided. To change her mind if he had to, he hadn’t been counting on Morgan catching him.

“Um, home I guess.”

“Oh, I think our Wonder Child is lying to us.”

Garcia, too. There was no way he’d get away from both of them.

“I’m not lying, I just have to make a stop first then I’m going home.”

Derek crossed his arms, looking on in amusement. “Oh? And what’s the stop?”

Spencer huffed. “Fine, I’m going to Kari’s okay? I don’t want her to leave, so I’m going to ask her to stay. I already have, but, I want to see what she has decided.”

“And then change her mind?”

Garcia grabbed Spencer’s arm. “I’m in let’s go.”

“What, all of us? I was hoping to…”

“Come on, Reid, she can’t refuse if we all gang up on her.”

Derek chuckled. “And you think ganging up on her is the way to make her stay?”

“I can’t have any more of my babies leave, come on, we’ll see if JJ will go too.”

Arriving the team looked around in puzzlement. “This place doesn’t look like the kind of place, Pixie Stick should be in.”

“I know the rooms are even smaller.”

“How do you know that, Reid?”

Spencer blushed and sputtered. “Last night, when I got drunk, Kari brought me here.”

“Awww, Kare-Bear was taking advantage of the G-Man.”

Spencer slapped Garcia’s hand away from pinching his cheek. “She was not. It…you don’t understand.”

“We know, Spence, she was trying to take care of you.”

He looked at JJ and nodded. “She was.”

Knocking on the door they waited a few minutes with no answer. Spencer looked at it sadly. “She texted me that she was home not too long ago.”

Derek knocked more loudly, getting an unfamiliar voice yelling at them, the door swung open and a young girl looked at them in bewilderment.

“Okay, there is way too many of you and not a single pizza, the hell?”

[imaginingcriminalminds]

The Definitions between Heroes and Villains - Chapter 4

Title: The Definitions between Heroes and Villains - Chapter 4 Author: totalfanfreak Rating: - Chapter: T - Story: M Prompt/Summary: I don’t think I have a prompt for this chapter – Chapter Summary: Tried to make it longer, with a flashback Main Character(s): Spencer Reid/ Original Female Character Trigger Warning: - Story: I will have many later on - Chapter: bullying Word Count: over 6000 Beta/Editor: Me Multishot: Yep, have no idea how long Author’s Notes: brief mentions of the episode North Mammon from S2. Love you guys @ ICM by the way for the post :D, I’ll also try to write another Y/N before the next chapter Morgan arc spoilers?: Eventually…

ephemeral(adj.) - term originating in Greece, lasting for a very short time; the concept of things being transitory, existing only briefly.

Her placement at the BAU was given an extension, and a few weeks had spanned into a few months. Karita could not figure if it was for her benefit or if the FBI was actually having trouble putting someone in the department. She guessed it was the first one. She hadn’t been able to find any information on what she needed yet. Of course, she had next to nothing to go by, no real name, last known location, date of birth, nothing of nada. Karita had hoped to recognize the woman’s face in one of the line ups of the FBI’s databases lists. But the organization she was tied to took care of their members’ identities, making sure they were safe and anonymous.

She hadn’t minded the stay; she kept in touch with her family, touching base with her aunt in New York to know where everyone was assigned to and any updates in the cases that came into their office. It made her feel a tad guilty for not doing her share up there but either way she was stopping bad guys, so she never felt guilty for long.

The team was heading back home after their latest case that was in Pennsylvania. Three girls had been abducted, thrown into a basement, and forced to choose which of them was to be killed. It amazed her how people could think up these was to hurt people, the man had thought he was punishing the town. Hoping to the people would know his pain of being an outsider who cleaned up after everyone.

Looking over from the window she saw JJ engrossed in another case file as she always did on their way back home. Karita wanted to do something for her, she knew JJ was hurting, being in her home state and able to relate to the girls had shifted something in her. Thinking back to the younger JJ in the photo with her friends she wondered when she gave up soccer, were societal pressures put on her to make her strive for something else? Or was it of her own accord to go to work in government?

She’d have to figure it out later, her eyes were getting too heavy, the team trying to track down the unsub before the time he set was up. Now the exhaustion was washing over her and everyone else. When it was safe to take the seatbelt off, Kari decided to get herself a blanket from one of the cabinets. With the way everyone settled in their seats on the way home she wondered why no one else ever got one. Finding them she admitted they were an ugly color, a dirty yellow that reminded her of walking in the bathroom after someone in the morning; very stale urine, no other way to describe that color. She looked at the couch, seeing Spencer draped across the seats, she grabbed another blanket before closing the compartment door. 

His eyes were closed, but she couldn’t tell if he was truly asleep or not. She tossed the blanket over him, she made her way back to her seat.

“Aw, how sweet, taking care of Pretty Boy. Should I be jealous?”

During those few minutes Derek had decided to open his eyes, not able to help himself from teasing.

“Shut up and get back to your music, Dereek.”

The response was one of his baritone chuckles.

“Did you really want a blanket, Dereek?”

“No Pixie Stick, go get yourself some rest.”

Her lips pursed involuntarily at the name, though she had more or less accepted it by now, she settled into her seat. Pulling her legs to her chest in her customary position, she wrapped the blanket around herself. Dozing away in her little cocoon. Karita felt a tug, then a mild shake of her arm; slowly she untangled herself from sleep and saw Spencer looking down at her.

“Sorry for waking you, but we’ll be landing soon.”

Kari rubbed her eyes, stretching her legs and back from the prolonged position. “Already? It feels like we just took off.”

Spencer smiled tenderly. “Sleeping does that, t-thanks for the blanket by the way.”

Karita felt heat begin to rise in her cheeks. “No problem, I hope I didn’t overstep anything. I just think a nap’s better with a blanket.”

“Oh, no, you didn’t overstep anything. I agree, sometimes it is better, I’m usually so tired when we board that I don’t bother with getting one.”

Kari smiled, he was talking fast, and his tell that he was nervous. She didn’t know why she caused this in him still, but she found it endearingly sweet.

“If you want I can put yours away with mine.”

“Oh, no you don’t have to do that, Spen.”

Spencer’s brows rose in question. “Spen?”

Kari shrugged. “I thought it’d be better than mispronouncing it all the time. Besides, JJ got the first six letters; can’t I have the first four?”

She could have all of them she wanted. Spencer gulped at his thought, not daring to say it, allowing Karita to continue.

“Besides that’s what you do, isn’t it? You spin us around with all the things you know.”

“That’s one way of putting it, I guess.”

He yanked the blanket away from her, playfully, folding it up with his.

“Wow, not cool, Spensar, I might’ve taken my pants off.”

Spencer coughed in surprise. “We’re back to Spencer now?”

Kari’s eyes lit up. “So Spen can stay?”

Kari grinned before hearing - “I think we just witnessed a milestone in their relationship.”

They both turned at Derek’s voice realizing everyone on the plane was looking at them with a grin on their face. She could tell he was embarrassed, dodging away from their looks while he put the blankets away. Returning he sat across from her, as they had to buckle up to touch down.

Penelope had been waiting to hail them back from their journey. She hugged each of them, well, except Gideon and Hotch who smiled and retreated to their offices. After giving an extra-long one to Derek she turned to Kari, her joy of their return rubbing off on Kari. When the two hugged Kari whispered in her ear.

“I think we should do something for JJ, I think she’s overloaded from the case.”

Penelope nodded, the wheels in her head turning, before a sly grin took over. “We’re going out! We’ll go to the club, ooooh, there’s a new one, Polarized I think it’s called. It’s photography themed, the bar is black and white and the dance floor in color, and they’re supposed to have incredible drinks.”

Derek had approached the conversation, a smile cracking along his face. “Now that sounds like a good idea. I need to get out and let the ladies catch some of these moves.”

Karita laughed. “I’m sure they’d want you to keep them.”

“Think you could do any better, little Pixie?”

Karita shrugged. “Not saying no. I figure I’ll be the designated driver, for one car anyway.”

Penelope looked crestfallen. “Oh, no honey, forget that we’ll get cabs. We all need to have fun tonight.”

“I can’t drink, it messes with my stomach, and instead of risking getting sick I’ll let the rest of you make fools of yourself.”

“Oh poo, I don’t want you getting sick, what about you Reid? We’re taking JJ out.”

He had been listening from his desk, but he still looked startled when he was addressed. Like he figured he wouldn’t be invited. “I don’t know.”

“Come on, Wonder Boy, we need to get freaky tonight.”

Spencer cringed at that. Karita giggled. “Eh, maybe you could keep me company, I’m not too much of a partier but I have a feeling everyone else is going to lose control.”

Penelope feigned offended. “Hey! We are mature adults for the majority of the time, so if we want to get crunk off some cocktails then who’s to say we can’t?”

“I’m not saying anything. I’m just saying I’ll be there to hold your hair when those neon drinks come up.”

Penelope nodded satisfied. “Good. I’m going to go get JJ.”

Watching her flounce away Kari turned to Derek chuckling. “Do you think Hoss or Gideon will join us?”

Derek snorted. “No way, Gideon is more classical and jazz and Hotch is…Hotch.”

Karita made a noise in understanding, watching JJ’s brightened face come around the bullpen with Penelope. “I just want everyone to have a good time.”

“They will, now come on Pixie Stick, you and Pretty Boy can sit in the back to keep an eye on us kids.”

Spencer rolled his eyes while everyone followed to Derek’s SUV. Everybody fit in comfortably though Spencer and Karita were squished together in the back. Their thighs kept rubbing against each other especially with Spencer trying to get his long legs to fit, glad when he was able to convince the girls to pull up the seat. Helping them push it up his elbow came back and smacked Kari in the chest.

“God, Kari I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pull back that hard.”

“It’s okay, Spen, my, um, physical structure took the blunt of the blow.”

Spencer sucked in his lips and went to look out the window, becoming uncharacteristically silent as they drove to the club.

It was packed, and Kari and Spencer looked to find an available table in the black and white room as the rest went to get the drinks. Luckily a man seemed to have charmed a girl away from the table, leaving it vacant. Not too long after their find, the gang came back; the girls with their cocktails, Derek with his beer, a ginger ale for Kari and a Shirley Temple. Spencer’s eyes flared at Derek.

“What? I didn’t think you were drinking tonight.”

“You know I wouldn’t want this.”

Switching the glasses with him, Kari smiled at Spencer. “I like Shirley Temples so I don’t mind.”

She patted Spencer’s shoulder to calm his anger before taking a sip of the over sweetened drink, trying not to grit her teeth as the sugar rushed to her blood. That was enough sugar for the night.

“If you don’t mind, Pretty Boy, I’ll be taking your girl out on the floor.”

Flabbergasted, Spencer started stuttering. “She’s not…She doesn’t even…”

“Yeah, yeah we’ll be back.”

Taking a brief look back she saw Spencer put his head down on the table. “You shouldn’t do that to him. I think he did really well getting out here tonight.”

“I’m just trying to get him out there, I know he likes you, Pixie Stick, and I’m pretty sure you like him.”

Karita nearly grimaced. “Office romances aren’t allowed, it would mess everything up. I just got all of you to accept me here I don’t need to put a different strain on things.”

She was being defensive, guilt of other matters building up inside her. “Whoa, whoa there Shorty, I’m just speaking my mind. It’s up to you too to do something about how you feel. I’m only trying to point him the right direction.”

“Well, I wish you wouldn’t.”

“May I ask why?”

Sighing Karita rolled her eyes and looked on to the dancing couples. “I’d only drag him down.”

Pulling her by the elbow Derek took her on the dance floor, surprising him that she could move to the rhythm with a mixture of fun and sensuality.

“I think I’ve found me a dancing partner on Saturday nights.”

Karita shook her head giggling. “I don’t know about that, Dereek.”

“Where’d you learn those moves?”

She shrugged. “Here and there, I have an affinity for a small number of things, dancing being one of them.”

“And the others?”

He waggled his brows, playfully, and she knew what he was suggesting. “I’m good at languages I guess and reading people.”

More than you could know.

“Alright, alright if you want to keep your bigger talents secret that’s fine. Come on I think the ladies are signaling you over for a scheduled bathroom break.”

Karita had danced with everyone, but Spencer. And thinking about it she hadn’t seen him since she left to dance with Derek. Searching for him she started to get alarmed until she found him slumped at the bar.

“Spensar?”

Turning abruptly, he fell back against the counter; his eyes clouded and he had become more disheveled than he was before.

“What’s happened to you?”

“You left, still leaving, so I thought I’d get something to drink. Something everyone else obviously thinks I’m unable to handle.”

“I never said you couldn’t drink.”

“You said you wanted me to keep you company and then you ran off with Morgan.”

“I’m sorry, that’s why I came looking for you hoping we could dance.”

“I don’t like to dance, I’m bad at it, my limbs are too long and I can’t move right.”

“I don’t believe that.”

He turned back to the bar, consuming another shot. “Afraid so, I guess it’s a good thing you brought Morgan to dance with.”

“Please don’t be like this, I came here wanting to spend time with all of you, and raise your spirits, but it looks like I did the opposite with you.”

“I don’t want you to leave.”

“I’m right here, Spen, I’m not going anywhere.”

Spencer shook his head, sandy curls flying. “No, when they find someone for the department. I don’t want you to leave.”

“I don’t know -”

“There’s so much I want to tell you still, we’re alike, I can see that. You don’t say it but I know, you never talk about her, the same reason I don’t talk about mine. I asked Garcia and she found something about it. I meant to tell you, but I couldn’t figure out how without you being mad at me. You have so many secrets, Karita, I can tell. I bet underneath your clothes you really do have wings, don’t you?”

Kari blushed, her breath coming to a halt. He’d been looking things up about her, if Garcia was really that good she wondered how much she could unearth. An alarm went off in her head, causing something to thrust inside her mind, but she was able to push it back. She couldn’t handle any interludes from prying minds she’d have to deal with it later. Her files were concealed, but what he was talking about was for sure her mother…and his. So she had been right then, his mother was sick. The same way as hers. She reached out to steady him, only for him to pull her to him.

“You remind me so much of someone I knew as a kid. She was nice like you too. And so pretty, her eyes, like yours…they -”

A look of horror came across Spencer’s face as he pushed away as best he could and vomited in one of the plants. Not long after he started, the manager came and asked for Kari to escort him away. Assuring him, she was taking him to sleep it off, she alerted the others. Letting them continue with their festivities. She decided to take him to her apartment, it was much closer, and she could tell he was going to get sick again soon.

She looked at him, her hand rubbing circles on his back as he had his forehead pushed against the window. Perhaps it cooled his skin. She wasn’t going to move him if he didn’t need to be moved. So he remembered her, she wondered if he had or not. She thought with the fact she had been unable to talk back then would make it hard to pinpoint her. It took the scarf to remember him though; going from an average twelve year old to a super tall twenty-five year old was quite a bit of an age gap to recall. But she remembered the scarf; after all, she had been the one to give it to him.

It was late October during their stay in Vegas and the wind had begun to have a chill in it. She didn’t care too much for it, but it was better than being cooped up in the hotel room. Karita was happy she was able to steal her brother’s jacket on the way out. Tightening the sides around her small frame, she made her way through the familiar suburbs. She didn’t know why they had to come back; she hadn’t wanted to come back. But that psychiatrist brought up the word closure and her aunt had jumped on the idea. Karita understood and was thankful her aunt and uncle wanted to help with her pain and wanted her to move on, but being back to the source of the pain was not the way to go about it. But the building was gone now and that’s what mattered. In a way, it had felt good to watch the walls crumble and dust rising. But a wrecking ball isn’t going to scrub the blood away.

Sighing she wished they would take that sort of interest in her brother’s trauma. But Mikael was never forthcoming about what happened to him. He never even talked to her about it, and he never let her peak. He usually always let her see. It wasn’t really telepathy, okay, maybe it was, but it was more than that. When she tried to read other people she could only get the surface emotion or whatever they were thinking of currently. She couldn’t delve into their heads and hear what they hear, smell what they smell, or live as they were in that moment. She also couldn’t use anyone else as a personal amplifier; using her brothers strengths to bulk up her own or borrowing his gifts completely. And it worked vice-versa.

Crossing the road she decided she would make a circle and head back before anyone noticed she was gone. As she was about to descend onto the adjoining block she felt a tremble. She felt something painful, but she couldn’t see anyone around. It wasn’t coming from herself. Not this – it was pain of embarrassment, humiliation, rejection, and fear.

It was strong to be coming to her from such a distance. Usually a person had to be in her sight to feel them but this it was clear as glass. Back pedaling she found herself at a school. Before she could find the source a loud honking came behind her. Looking over her shoulder she wasn’t surprised to see her brother had found her. It did surprise her that he was driving their uncle’s car. Being fifteen he didn’t have a license, and she knew her uncle would’ve taken the keys with him when they left with the gala charity people or whoever. Rolling her eyes she went over to the driver’s side signing her concerns.

Her brother snorted in aggravation. “You’re getting mad at me? I take a nap and you decide to take off to God knows where. Where the hell are you going anyway?”

She pointed over to the school, her tuning picking back up, and heading toward the root of it again.

“Kari! Karita!”

Annie.

That was a low blow; she gave her brother a dirty look before continuing on her way.

Kari, we’re going to get in trouble.

That’s not my name. That’s not me anymore, and you know that. We’re different people now.

Not to me, we’re not, those kids never even got to be anything. Don’t they deserve to live?

But we are alive; does a name really make that much difference in shaping us?

To me it does, Annie.

Let me help him.

Who?

Instead of answering, Karita made her way to the football field; squinting her eyes she could make out a shadow on one of the goals. She cautiously made her way towards it trying to find any underlying threat within the figure. Getting closer she saw it was a boy; he couldn’t have been much older than her. She couldn’t tell if he was conscious or not, he had his head down, chin digging into his naked chest. In fact he was completely naked. She gasped and flushed taking a small step back.

He’s naked.

Who? Who the hell are you talking about, Little Bit?

The boy that’s sad, he’s naked, and tied up to the post.

Fuck sake.

Didn’t aunty load some of our stuff in the car so we could get out of here quick for check out tomorrow?

Yep. Always steps ahead, like a good girl scout.

Mikael.

I can already guess what you want, let me park and I’ll bring some clothes over.

Thank you.

The pressure in her head emptied with her brother gone, and she stepped back to the boy. There were no visible markings on him to show he was injured, but the embarrassment coursing through him was enough damage. Reaching a hand out, she tentatively shook his shoulder. He jerked, and she could almost feel the rope burn cutting into his arms. She began signing, but the boy shook his head.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know sign language.”

Biting her lip, she took off her coat, draping it over the boy. He looked at her in confusion as she set to work untangling the knots. Whoever had tied him had made sure he wouldn’t have an easy time getting loose; three pairs of jump ropes had been tied around him tightly. She heard the boy sniffling and wondered how long he had been out here.

“Any luck?”

Both of them jumped at her brother’s voice, seeing him come with a wadded up thing of clothing. She narrowed her eyes.

Did you have to pick out your grossest pair?

Look at him, he won’t care, beggars can’t be choosers anyways.

Will you shut up and help me?

The boy’s eyes widened in shock as Mikael took a switchblade out of his pocket, starting to the vinyl ropes with ease. She dropped the clothes in the boy’s lap pointing to a nearby tree before signing again.

“I’m sorry; I really don’t know what you’re saying.”

“She’s saying to change behind there when I cut you free.”

“Oh. Thank you both. I d-didn’t think anyone was going to help me. I thought I’d be here all night, and they’d come back and laugh at me again in the morning. I thought I’d be here forever.”

“They couldn’t keep you here forever kid.”

The boy choked on a sob. “You didn’t see them, none of them cared, it was entertaining to them.”

“Well, aren’t they a bunch of weirdos.”

Cutting him free, Mikael and Karita let the boy shuffle with all the clothing around him to cover himself as he made his way to the tree.

“That kid’s junk touched my jacket, didn’t it?”

You can wash it.

“Can’t wash that, I’ll still know.”

We should let him keep it.

Mikael grunted in agreement, seeing the boy emerge in Mikael’s sweats. Though the boy was pretty tall he was still thin and the clothing sagged on him. She signed to her brother.

“My sister wants to know how long you’ve been here.”

“I-I, they tied me up after school.”

We should feed him and take him home.

Mikael rolled his eyes agitated.

He’s not a pet, Kari, we have to get back too or we’ll get in trouble.

Karita pouted and Mikael easily relented.

“Fine, damn it. Kid, get in the car, we’ll get you something to eat and take you home.”

The boy looked stunned for a moment. “You’ve helped me enough, I couldn’t ask you to do that. I don’t live too far from here anyways.”

“Yeah, but my sister won’t let me hear the end of it if I let you go by yourself.”

The boy turned to Karita, bewildered. She tried to give her best reassuring smile, but with the boy looking as his feet now so unsure she didn’t think that it worked too well.

“But she doesn’t talk, does she?”

“What?”

“You said, ‘she won’t let you hear the end of it.’ Wouldn’t that imply she’d nag you?”

“She signs, and she can find other ways to annoy me without using words. Are you getting in the car with us or not?”

The boy shuffled, looking between the car and the sidewalk. Kari got into the backseat, hoping the boy would join them. She understood, they were strangers, and strangers, no matter how young, could hurt you. And this boy had been through the ringer today. After standing for a while the boy accepted the offer and got into the back with her. Mikael drove faster than he was supposed to, probably thinking they’d get done quicker.

“Are you allergic to anything?”

Startled the boy looked at Mikael.

“Pardon?”

“Allergic, I don’t want to poison you. My sister and I have several allergies, so if there’s something specific you want you better say it now.”

He was mad, she could tell, and she sent him a breeze of gratitude over him. He grunted but didn’t reply to it.

“It doesn’t matter, whatever you two are getting.”

They settled on the patio of a small diner, and they could both tell the boy was nervous.

“You need to calm down there, man.”

“I just don’t understand why you’re both being so nice to me.”

“Did you want us to leave you back there?”

“No.”

“My sister figured you hadn’t eaten, and it’s like what…almost eleven at night. You’re not hungry?”

“No, I am. I just don’t understand is all.”

“What’s to understand, you were in trouble, we helped. Those people were dicks for doing that to you.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me, thank this one, she always has to help the underdog.”

The boy couldn’t help but give a smile to Karita which she fully returned. After finishing their meal, Mikael backtracked and pulled up to the boy’s house. The boy started getting out before turning.

“I don’t know how to thank you both.”

“Already told you, just tell her.”

“I don’t even know your names.”

“It’s better that way.”

“Well, mine’s Spencer.”

Helping him out, Mikael told him to keep the jacket. “I wish you both went to my school. It’d been nice to have some friends.”

Karita signed to him, but the boy shook his head sadly.

“She says you are our friend.”

The Spencer’s lip trembled, and Karita went to the car to open the trunk. Getting what she wanted she went back to him, wrapping one of her scarves around his neck.

“Thank you.”

She signed again, her brother interpreting for her. “She asks to try and remember us, because we’ll remember you.”

“I won’t, but I can’t take this.”

“She says don’t worry about it her dad gave it to her, now he’ll have to bring her another one – I’m not saying that.”

Spencer looked between them in confusion. “Please, what did she say?”

Sighing in annoyance her brother replied. “She says purple brings out the gold in your eyes, you shine.”

Spencer grinned, suddenly looking behind him. “I should get inside; my mother is probably worried about me. Thank you both again.”

“No problem just got to go faster than normal to get back before our aunt and uncle does.”

“I’m sorry I’ve kept you.”

“Don’t worry about it. Come on, Little Bit.”

Giving one last look at him, Karita stood on her tip toes and kissed Spencer’s cheek before retreating to the car.

Pulling up in front of her apartment, she paid the driver, before heaving Spencer out of the car.

“Do you think you can make it, Spen?”

“I can try, I might…I might need a bucket.”

The only thing they had was a cigarette can by the door. She could replace the sand tomorrow, and she poured it outside and handed the receptacle to Spencer.

“Thank you. I drank too much.”

“You did.”

“But you were ignoring me.”

“I wasn’t ignoring you, Spen. I was spending time with all of you.”

“All those guys looking at you.”

“I doubt that. If they were looking at me they were probably wondering how a kid got into a bar.”

“Why can’t you see how beautiful you are?”

“Why can’t you?”

He was taken aback by the question, falling back onto the railing. “Men aren’t supposed to be beautiful, you know, it emasculates them. Men are supposed to be handsome.”

“Why can’t you be both?”

Getting into her apartment, she settled him on her couch. “Stay here and I’ll get you something to sleep in.”

“I don’t think I can wear your clothes.”

She laughed at his serious tone. “They’re my brothers, and friends, other family. I like to take clothes. If I ever get in your apartment I may take some of yours so fair warning.”

“What could you possibly want of mine?”

“A cardigan for starters, they always look snuggly.”

“You do too.”

She blushed, heat making her palms sweat. “I wish you’d stop talking that way, Spensar.”

“Why? I’m only saying what I feel.”

“I think the alcohol may have more to do with it.”

“No, it’s only helping to encourage me. I’ve wanted to say so many things and I couldn’t. But now I can and you’re leaving.”

“I’m not going anywhere anytime soon, Spen.”

“Good, because I want you here.”

“But why?”

“What do you mean why? Because I like you and care about you.”

“I don’t think you would if you knew me.”

She left the room digging through the clothes in her drawers and found some guy sweats and a shirt. About to leave the room she collided with Spencer’s chest.

“Kari?”

She licked her lips too terrified, to move. “Yes, Spen?”

“I’d feel really stupid if I didn’t do this.”

“Do what?”

As she was asking her question, Spencer’s mouth sloppily collided with hers. She wanted to push him away and at the same time she didn’t. Letting him attack her mouth, she sighed, she hadn’t been kissed in a long time, and only by one other person. It felt good. She felt wanted, and cherished in the kiss, even if it wasn’t precise and tasted faintly of purged cocktails. He leaned his head on her forehead.

“Thank you.”

“I don’t think you have to thank the person you kiss, Spen.”

“You could’ve pushed me away.”

“But I didn’t want to.”

“I’m glad.”

Getting him changed she laid him down in her bed, putting on her own pajamas and getting in on the opposite side.

                                                                                                                                                                                    Waking up, Spencer was in pain and aroused at the same time. His head and stomach were rebelling against him. But due to the dream he had just had another appendage throbbed painfully. He groaned, what happened? They came back from a case that he remembered. They went out for drinks. Yes, and like a fool he consumed more than he should have. That explains the hangover. Kari had taken him home, no, he had taken him to her apartment. He was in her house, in her bed, and he had an erection! Opening his eyes, he blinked, only to shriek when he saw a pair of red eyes was staring back at him.

Leaping from the bed he breathed relief when he saw it was a rabbit. So Kari had a rabbit? The white ball of fur stood up on his hind legs sniffing at him. The scare killed his erection at least. Sighing he took in the room, it was nice, in a way it reminded him of Karita. A mix of classical, modern, and bizarre. It was then the smell of food cooking hit him, stomach growling, he realized how ravenous he was. Making his way out of the room he took in how small the apartment seemed, in no time he found her humming while cooking whatever delicious smelling things was coming from the skillet. Taking a better look he saw another rabbit perched up on a stool, seemingly relaxed by her side. The other rabbit bustling between his legs, Spencer squeaked, attracting Kari’s attention.

“Good morning, Spensar.”

He blushed, knowing what an idiot he had been. “Good morning to you too.”

“I’m making breakfast, and lunch. Usually on the weekend I prep my meals so I can just throw it in the microwave when I come home. But since you’re my first guest ever, I wanted to make it special.”

He smiled. “Thank you, but you don’t have to do that, I should probably be getting home and have a change of clothes.”

“Don’t be silly, I already cleaned your clothes from last night. If you want we can have a picnic or something.”

He knew he kissed her, was this her way of establishing something. He didn’t know what to do.

“T-that would be nice.”

“I usually take the bun-buns with me too, if that’s okay.”

“Yeah, I got acquainted with one not too long ago.”

He pointed to the white rabbit and Kari grinned. “Oh, that’s March; I can tell he likes you. I came to check on you and he was stretched out beside you on the bed.”

“March?”

“Like the March Hare of course, and this one’s Hatter, if he hadn’t smelt any food he’d probably be lazing with you too.”

“Animals usually don’t like me.”

“I can’t really believe that. You’re too good to not be liked, they can sense that.”

“No, really, they bark, scratch and squawk at me usually.”

“Maybe they don’t get the time to know you better. It takes more than a sniff sometimes to get a feel for someone.”

Spencer shrugged taking a seat at the little island. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“Nope, I got everything just about done. You can help yourself to some coffee if you want to though. Or tea, I have every kind of tea you can imagine. Oh, including ones for when you’re…you know…hungover.”

Spencer blushed, taking one of the mugs that lay on the counter. “Coffee will be fine, but thank you.”

“Um…sugar?”

It took a minute for realization spread on Kari’s face before she moved to a cabinet. “I forget some people don’t take to Splenda. I always keep an emergency canister in case of that.”

Handing him the sugar she began making their plates. “I can’t remember the last time I’ve had a homemade meal. I can’t really cook, unless sandwiches count. So usually it’s takeout.”

“I wish you would’ve told me that, Spen, I could’ve brought you something.”

“That’s sweet of you, but not necessary.”

“To me it is, you shouldn’t just be eating out of a box all the time, Spen. Or sandwiches.”

He chuckled dumping in his preferred amount of sugar. When he tried to move his feet he felt something heavy on top, looking down Spencer saw the white rabbit had made himself at home with his feet. He turned when he heard Karita giggling, it was a wonderful sound.

“See he likes you, he’s doing that so you’ll pet him.”

“Maybe after breakfast, March.”

The white rabbit’s response was to blink up at them with his ruby eyes.

In between bites Karita began cleaning up the kitchen, refusing any help from Spencer.

“You’re my guest, how am I supposed to get a good review if I put you to work?”

So he had leaned back in his chair, polishing off all his food, and downing to cups of coffee before he summoned the courage to speak.

“Kari, we should talk about last night?”

She stopped her movements, facing him, as she braced her hands on the counter. “Which part?”

“All of it.”

“Spen, I –“

Of course the phone would ring, he’d already made a jackass out of himself and maybe ruined his friendship with someone but that phone would always be ringing.

“JJ wants us to come in, there may be a case.”

“Yeah, she just sent me a text. I guess we put this on the backburner for now.”

Spencer shrugged, deflated. “I guess so.”

Before entering the bullpen, Karita pulled Spencer back. He looked down at her hand on his wrist before focusing on her face. She seemed at a loss for words, before searching his face.

“I don’t know what’s going to happen, Spen. But I hope you know I care about you too.”

Spencer grinned, hugging her small frame to him.

Entering the bullpen he felt full of life, he hadn’t been this happy in a good while. Things would work out; they could make it work if they tried. He wasn’t going to have to face the dark alone anymore. He was oblivious to anything. Unpacking his things he was stopped by Hotch who was standing next to an older woman.

“Dr. Reid, this is Agent Emily Prentiss.”

“Um, it’s nice to meet you.”

The woman nodded to him, and Spencer turned back to Hotch. This was not looking good.

“Strauss sent her here as Greenway’s replacement. I was hoping you could show her around.”

His heart plummeted to the bottom of his stomach, it was only fitting it would be like this. Only his life could be a continuity of all things unjust.

[imaginingcriminalminds]

The Definitions between Heroes and Villains - Chapter 1

Title: The Definitions between Heroes and Villains Author: totalfanfreak Rating: Let’s make it T-T+ for now, there won’t be anything explicit in this chapter but eventually there will be blood, angst and smut. - Chapter: T - Story: Overall M-M+ eventually Prompt/Summary: Ugh, can’t find the link anywhere, I know it’s there but too many to go through, but it’s – imagine Reid meeting you on you first day at the BAU and becoming fascinated by you, also a close one is - http://67.media.tumblr.com/43d6d30a8cf3b0c3e511de272b84326b/tumblr_nc4thxlfTz1tmutn3o1_r2_500.png – Chapter Summary: meh, just the introductions Main Character(s): Spencer Reid, OC (female character), Jason Gideon, with splashes of everyone in between Trigger Warning: - Story: Oh, yes, down the line I’m sure there will be triggers - Chapter: Don’t think so… Word Count: Beta/Editor: Me, but if you’re offering… Multishot: Yes [All parts in this story will have the tag “Karita.”] Author’s Notes: Sorry, this is going to be OC instead of Reader POV, and eventually I want it to be a crossover. But I want to give the readers a chance to draw out what I’m combining here.. Morgan arc spoilers?: Eventually will have episode spoilers but it will span from episodes season 2 onwards with a few original cases in between

1. Dépaysement (n) – French, the feeling of not being at home, in a foreign or different place, can be either a good or a bad feeling; change of scenery

Breathe in, breathe out. That’s all she had to do. Her job was the same, just a different location. She’d do her job at the best of the capabilities, get the intel she needed, and be done. The job wasn’t even meant to last over four weeks, it’d be fine. Only a lot of people had to pull strings to get her in there, and she didn’t know anyone. Well, her father worked in the department one of the puppeteers that pulled the strings, but this wasn’t her workplace. She had known her colleagues for years, most she was related to in some way, these people at Quantico were virtually strangers. What if they didn’t like her? Or thought she wasn’t good enough to be working here?

Jesus, this was as bad as high school, taking a deep breath she plunged through the doors only exhaling as the rush of cold from the air conditioner hit her face. She filed in line through security getting directions from the guard on where to go. Going through a small hallway she found the door of Erin Strauss. Knocking softly, she heard a muffled response to come in. The office was mainly cherry oak and dark but she brightened when she saw the older woman coming to greet her. She was enveloped in a soft hug,

Strauss’ familiar fragrance of lilac and cotton wrapping around her.

“Karita, it’s been too long, let me look at you.”

Holding her within arm’s reach Strauss looked at her. “You’ve grown to be a beautiful young woman; you look so much like your mother.”

It was always a wonderful compliment, and she blushed. Karita always compared herself to her deceased mother, but with her eyes were not the same shade and the way she had repeatedly dyed her hair to a bizarre color made her far from her mother’s spectrum. She thanked the elder woman anyways.

“How have you been, Rin?”

Strauss tutted, wagging her index finger. “We should get out of the way, that we must remain formal here. I know you’re used to things a little more casual but here, things are different. I’m glad to see you’ve chosen some business attire today, and your hair is…erm…”

“A more natural color?”

“Yes, exactly. We must give off to the people we are involved with that we are a sense of structure, that we work finely tuned, and know how to get things done. We can’t go off on a case acting unprofessional, I’m not saying have no compassion, but you have to have a clear distance to things to see them correctly.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Going to sit at her desk, Strauss offered you a seat across it. “To answer your question, things have been fine. In fact, I just had a very nice lunch with you aunt Coralyne a few weeks ago.”

Karita grimaced internally, the only way the two of them would sit down together is to discuss work, and ‘nice’ had to be a metaphor like -eye gouge out cut out tongue metaphor.

“How’s Tim?”

Strauss looked at her from the stack of files. “He and I divorced several months ago, it wasn’t too messy and the kids are old enough to understand. Now, let’s take a look at your file.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to –“

“Karita, it’s fine. Okay, you chose… Siskin as your last name here?”

She shrugged. “My father picked it out for me.”

Strauss nodded in understanding. “I see. You’ve had three years working as an investigative specialist, before that you interned with the violent criminal apprehension program. Sound good?”

Karita shrugged her shoulders sadly. “It’s your story; I’m just a character in it.”

“Please, don’t be that way. This can be beneficial on both our parts. You know what you’re here for, so you can get down to it.”

“Um, but where? I wasn’t given much notice on this, if we had any Mikael would’ve accompanied me.”

“Hmm, better that he didn’t we don’t need anyone with that kind of temper here. Come along, I’ll escort you to Gideon’s office and he’ll take over from there.”

She nodded, getting up to follow behind her. The elevator ride was silent, approaching the glass doors as she scuffled in, she allowed herself to look about the place she would be working during this time. Barely missing running into a large African American man, who chuckled at her stumbling.

“Well, well Strauss what have you brought up here?”

Strauss nodded at the man curtly. “Agent Morgan, this is Agent Siskin, she will be working with you in Greenway’s place until we can find a permanent replacement.”

Karita saw the way the man flinched at the name Greenway and she felt his heart tighten slightly as if in mourning.

“I trust you to make her feel a part of the team.”

He looked at her, as if gauging, his teeth in full display again. “Dutifully, noted, all of us will make her feel at home.”

Karita smiled at him. “Thank you and it’s nice to meet you Agent.”

“Morgan will do fine.”

“Seeing as your introductions have been made I will hand you over to Agent Morgan and allow him to escort you to Gideon’s office.”

“It’ll be a pleasure.”

Karita tried to grasp for words. “But I –“

Strauss smiled softly. “You’ll be fine.”

Placing a hand on her shoulder, Morgan steered her in the other direction. “You got the dragon lady to smile, I either have to say you’ve got amazing skills or you know each other.”

Should she tell him? You two had just met but she felt he wouldn’t put anything together. “When I was a child, I haven’t seen her in ages though.”

“Damn, that accent.”

Her eyes darted up to him, and she chuckled. “It’s not that bad.”

“Not bad at all, just not what I expected.”

“What were you expecting?”

“Perhaps, South Dakota, so where do you hail from?”

“California.”

Morgan looked at her skeptically, she shrugged coyly. “I lived surrounded by two generations of Austrians, if that helps.”

Morgan chuckled, before turning serious. “How long have you been in this line of work?”

“Over three years.”

“I’m sorry, please don’t take this the wrong but they looked like they recruited you straight from a middle school.”

She sighed, she was used to this. “I’m twenty-three.”

“I was leaning more to fifteen or sixteen but I’ll take your word for it, pixie stick.”

“Pixie stick?”

Before she could properly respond, a woman with a bright blue dress that matched her glasses comes up behind Morgan.

“Please, ignore my chocolate Adonis, our latest pretty. He likes the taste of foot in his mouth, and if he had just come to me in the first place I could have told him that you were qualified for this.”

“Um, I’m sorry Agent…”

“Just Garcia, or Penelope, but you’ll come to see it’s a last name sort of place.”

Karita eyed her outfit enviously, wishing she had her jeans in place of the skirt she had on. But Garcia’s hair had been donned with a crown of daisies, and the Small Wonder charm bracelet she had made you wish you had done more research on what the FBI expected in business attire.

“Penelope, thank you, how would you know that I was qualified?”

Garcia looked at her like the answer was obvious. “Your file, silly, oh, I’m the tech goddess over this unit and I make it my personal business to get to know everyone before they get here. On screen, of course.

Morgan shrugged his shoulders defensively. “I had no clue we were getting a new girl, mama, how was I supposed to know to come to you?”

“You should’ve come to me regardless, you know I need my Morgan fix in the morning.”

Morgan laughed, hugging Garcia to him, it made Karita smile. Maybe this place wouldn’t be so bad. It didn’t appear as strict and mechanical as everyone made it sound. Pulling away from Morgan, Garcia looped her arms with Karita.

“Over this way will be your desk.”

“Thank you, but I’m supposed to see Agent Gideon first.”

“Oh, he’s a big ole softy you’ll be fine to chat with your co-workers for a few minutes.”

Being led she were stopped at a tandem desk, just like the ones from her old office. Hers had been attached to her sister’s and she began to miss home terribly.

“So if you like it here, is there any way you can stay permanently?”

Karita looked at the woman in shock. “I, well, I never thought about it, possibly, I guess.”

“Yay! I can already tell I like you and it’ll just get better from here. I don’t want any more of my pretties leaving me.”

“I’m sorry about Agent Greenway, I don’t really know the details, but it’s always hard when someone you’re close to leaves.”

Garcia’s eyes down casted. “She was a good friend, yet I can understand, with her circumstances, how the job got to her. I’m hoping she’s happier now.”

Karita nodded, with a sympathetic smile. The jobs could get awful; a majority of the time wishing she herself could opt out of the career.

“Oh, good here comes your desk mate. Karita meet our illustrious Dr. Reid. If there is any fact you want prattled on for hours he’s your guy.”

Karita looked up to the lanky man, stumbling with a files under one arm, a messenger bag slung over his shoulder, and blowing on a mug of coffee approaching the desk adjacent hers. She also took in the blush that took over his cheeks at Garcia’s statement.

“Very funny, Garcia. It’s, um, nice to meet you.”

He smiled but didn’t offer his hand, though with them full would’ve been quite the task. “It’s nice to meet you, too, Doctor.”

“Reid, you can call me Reid.”

This man was shy; Karita could tell by the hesitant behavior, she was sure if he hadn’t worked here that he would bolt from the room.

“Okay, then it’s nice to meet you, Reid.”

He smiled, nervously, straightening out the items on his desk. And Garcia squealed.

“I know we’re all going to do well together, I can feel it. I have a sixth sense about these things.”

“There’s no such as a sixth senses like that, scientists are working on that humans have a sixth sense to be able to detect the Earth’s magnetic field. But to sense friendship is probably never going to happen.”

“And there is your first taste of the good Doctor’s bubble bursting; he also can spout stuff things like that about anything you can think of. Sometimes a beautiful blessing other times a curse. We still love you though, junior g-man.”

Reid blushed again, and Karita couldn’t help but smile at the affection everyone held for each other.

“It’s nice to see all of you so close. I was worried I would be walking into a drone office and I’d have to keep my head down during my time here.”

“No, way, cupcake. We are all about love and splendor here; it’s out in the field you have to worry about.”

“Siskin?”

Popping her head up at her name, she turned and seen Jason Gideon leaning against the railing overlooking the bullpen.

“Yes?”

“Would you care to step in my office before you get too well acquainted with the team?”

Standing up, embarrassed, she began making her descent. “He’s not as bad as he looks. Neither him or Hotch.”

She looked between Reid and Gideon’s office. “I haven’t met Hotchner yet, is he as intimidating?”

Reid smiled. “Worse. But like I said, it’s mostly bark and no bite, they can be very intense and focused when it comes to the job, but they really are good people and friends to the people they work with.”

“That’s good to know, thank you.”

“And…”

She turned slowly, watching Reid struggle with his words. “If there’s, um, anything you need help with, obviously, I-I’m just across you.”

Karita grinned. “Thank you, Reid, since you might get tired of me asking you things.”

Reid smiled timidly. “I don’t think that’ll be possible.”

Walking up the few steps, she couldn’t help but feel eyes on her as she turned around to catch Reid ducking his head and taken a heightened interest in her mug.

Walking up to the office, Gideon held open the door for her, as she sat in one of the chairs.

“You still play chess?”

Looking at the board on his desk she could tell he was in the middle of a game. He smiled putting his hand on the top of her chair. “Yes, Dr. Reid and I play profusely.”

Karita spent a moment searching the for the word’s meaning inside her, why’d he always do that, like he knew her intelligence was nowhere near it should be. She sighed.

“Do you like it here so far?”

“From what I’ve seen, yes, it feels more casual than I thought it would.”

“It becomes a family.”

Karita looked at him, eyes glinting sternly. “Does it?”

“Yes, Karita.”

“Seeing as to how you were so opposed with me being here, I guess one would think you believe I know nothing about family.”

“That’s not true, and you know it. You know exactly why I didn’t want you here. Your mother –“

“Don’t please, I don’t want to fight. That’s not what I was meaning to do. Yes, it’s fine here, and I won’t be long anyways.”

“I wish you didn’t have to do any of this kind of work.”

“So do I, but we’re not in control of our lives are we?”

“Karita…”

“It’ll be odd at first but just like with Strauss, it will become easier to learn you as Gideon. So, if it’s okay, I’d like to get a grip on what is involved in working with the BAU, if that’s okay with you, father.”

[imaginingcriminalminds]

Seeping Beauty Pt. 2

Title: Sleeping Beauty Pt. 2 Author: totalfanfreak Rating: T Prompt/Summary: No, real prompts, more or less made my own – Spencer undergoes surgery to remove his tonsil and you volunteer to take care of him Main Character(s): Spencer Reid/ Reader Word Count: about 3,000 Trigger Warning: Fluff can trigger stuff right, like allergies? Beta/Editor: Me Multishot: yep, this is pt. 2 and should be final [Part 1 is here.] Author’s Notes: um….don’t think so Morgan arc spoilers?: Nope

After a while of stressing, you were able to pass out in the little chair, but upon waking a few hours later you instantly regretted it. Your back was in knots and your knees felt like they had rubber bands around them. You looked around, disoriented, your eyes settling when you realized Spencer had been brought back from surgery. You sighed in relief, knowing that he was going to be okay. The action was the wrong thing to do feeling your back seize up in protest; deciding to walk around for a quick bit before he woke up you decided to get something to drink. Walking through the hallway, you came across the nurse’s station and caught the eye of Spencer’s nurse.

She looked over your rumpled clothes and smiled. “That’s how most people pass the time when waiting for loved ones to come out of surgery, not too good for the body though. Usually people get a stiff neck or their legs fall asleep.”

“Yeah, my back feels like it’s eating itself, so maybe I should’ve brought a book or something.”

The nurse chuckled lightly. “Well, it’s over now, there shouldn’t be any complications. The doctor said everything went smoothly, there may some bleeding later on but it’s to be expected. So far Dr. Reid seems to be doing fine. He came out about twenty minutes ago so he should be waking up any time now.”

“Good, I’m glad everything went well. The way he was talking had me worried for a minute.”

“Yes, some patients do like to get them in a tizzy; I hate to tell him the worst parts coming.”

Your eyebrows shot up at that, you thought the worst was already over, what could happen now?

“What do you mean?”

“Today he should be fine, but sometime tomorrow, he’s not going to be a hundred percent, usually the pain kicks in full force. Then, well, Dr. Reid seems like a talker, and the pain is going to keep him from doing that and, also, what he can eat, I’ll give you a list of things he can have but a lot of it has to be soft texture. Many people find it hard to eat and refuse to, which is the wrong choice seeing as how you need to rebuild your strength, others dislike the fact that the food gets repetitive and start craving the foods they love. You’d be surprised how many people come in with bleeding just because they had to have a cheeseburger or gulp down a cup of coffee.”

“Coffee?” Oh, God, you hadn’t even thought of coffee, Spencer was going to lose it.

“Oh, yes, any hot beverage can increase bleeding risk. But I’ll talk that over with you two in a little bit; you should probably head back that way in case he wakes up.”

You gave one last smile before getting your drink, a big cup of ice water, giving up on the idea of drinking coffee in case Spencer woke up. There was no point in tempting him this early on. Finally reseating yourself you pulled the chair back next to his bed and stole the linked remote flipping on the news while you sipped your water.

You were becoming engrossed on one of the segments when you heard a squeak come from your side. Spencer was blinking his eyes, trying to fight off the grogginess. You grinned at him. “Welcome back.”

He smiled the best he could, making an attempt to swallow, and wincing. “It’s going to hurt for a while. I didn’t think to ask, but since you’re not going to get the pain medication we might need to ask the doctor about getting that throat spray that numbs it. At least we got plenty of throat lozenges.”

Getting up you wet a washcloth with warm water, helping Spencer wipe his face. He grunted embarrassed thanks. You smiled warmly patting his hand. It was too soon to tell if he remembered anything but so far nothing he displayed seemed to say he recalled anything. You both sit there in silence, listening to the television, until Spencer made a move to sit up. Scrambling from you seat, you reached for the remote controlling the mattress.

“Let me help, Spence.”

Pressing up it took you a second to realize you pressed the wrong one, Spencer smirking as his feet were in a propped position. You blushed, and you tried to shrug it off. “What? I thought you’d like them elevated.”

Spencer shrugged, still smiling, when you finally had him sitting up; the doctor and nurse deciding to make their entrance when you were fluffing a pillow behind his neck.

The older doctor beamed at you both, marking on Spencer’s chart before speaking. “It’s good news for you, Dr. Reid, the operation went as expected, and we should be able to discharge you later today. Seeing your female friend here it’s good to know you’ll have a support system to help you along your recovery. You should be able to get back to work in about two weeks, but the first few days you should worry about rest and just lounging around, think of it as a mini-vacation.”

You could practically feel Spencer’s need to roll his eyes; it wasn’t going to be much of a vacation with his throat on fire. “I see you opted out of pain management, I can’t make that call for you, but we’ll try to keep an eye out and work through some methods that might help the majority of pain.”

You felt like a kid in class leaning forward to ask a question. “What about throat numbing spray, doctor? Is he allowed to use that?”

“Oh, that might be ideal for the situation, as well as: NSAIDs as long as it’s not aspirin, it’ll help the swelling as well, we’ll call in a stronger form of ibuprofen and some antibiotics, Tylenol never hurt either.”

“And ice, have lots and lots of ice on standby.”

You looked over to the nurse as did the doctor who chuckled. “She’s right; the next week ice will be God send to you. “

You decided to pipe up again. “Can a heating pad help? Like ice it then heat it type thing?”

The doctor pondered a moment. “If it would help, by all means do it, though Dr. Reid shouldn’t consume anything hot for several days. You may consume warm liquids or soft solids too. You may also gargle with some warm salt water. You may expect a fever in the next few days, but it shouldn’t be anything serious. Are there any questions you may have?”

You looked to Spencer, who shook his head; you both had tried to do a little homework on the topic and bought some things you both thought were needed so hopefully things would go without incident. “I think we’re good.”

“Excellent, the nurse will send you off with a few pamphlets of Do’s and Do Not’s as well as a diet list with some ideas for a meal plan. If there are any complications or just have a few questions you have my number and don’t hesitate to call. Now I believe we’ll send you some papers and start getting you home. I know, you’ll be fine, Dr. Reid.”

He patted Spencer’s foot and you said goodbye as the doctor left. The nurse stood in front of you with the reading materials. “I hope you have a blender, because it’ll make things a lot easier for you both.”

You nodded vigorously. “Oh, yes, I’m going to stay with him while he recuperates so I just brought all that stuff over.”

The nurse smiled, like you had passed the test. “There’s plenty of um, ‘recipes,’ in here that should help along. The first few days he may only want to suck on some ice or popsicle, that’s fine, as long as it’s nothing red. It’ll be hard to tell if he might’ve started bleeding. Nothing to hard or crunchy, too hot or too cold, no acidic foods, or raw veggies or fruits. It’ll take time for the throat to heal. If worst comes to worst in preparing the food, stick to baby food, it’s got the vitamins and protein he needs, as well as the texture, and not seasoned, so it makes for a good choice. Like the doctor said if you have any questions just give us a call and we’ll help you in any way we can. Get well, Dr. Reid.”

Spencer huffed indignantly, making you giggle. “I know she talked to me like you weren’t there, but come on, you can’t really answer. But don’t worry I won’t feed you jarred baby food, we’ll make our own at your apartment.”

Spencer gave another grunt, but you could see the smile surfacing from him. It felt like it took too long just filling out paperwork, and you wanted to sprint when you got him in the wheelchair to go. “This is so much better than when you made the doof move and got anthrax poisoning. At least I didn’t have to worry as much this time.”

Making it to his apartment, you threw his keys into a bowl he kept near the door, you steered him in. “Do you want to lie down in bed? I was going to start making something for us to eat later.”

He pointed and mouthed the word couch and though he kept trying to bat you away you helped prop him up, taking off his shoes, and throwing a thin blanket over him. “Comfy?”

He nodded. “Good, I’ll get you some crushed ice before starting dinner.”

Filling up the mug the hospital gave, you grabbed the bell you bought a few days ago from one of your bags. “I thought I’d bring this, that way you don’t have to strain your voice if I’m somewhere you can’t hear.”

He smiled giving it a little ting. “Thanks…for…everything.”

Everything coming from him was garbled, and you winced internally at the struggle. “You don’t have to thank me, Spence, just try to get better.”

You handed him some books from his shelf, even bringing some of your old college textbooks for him to skim through. Industrial hygiene hadn’t been interesting to you at all, but Spencer lit up seeing the heavy volume. Satisfied he was taken care of for now you set back out in the kitchen, propping the door of it open so you were sure to hear the bell.

Looking over all the material the nurse gave you, you tried to settle on something to make. You didn’t really think it’d be fair to eat normally in front of Spencer, so you were trying to find a good compromise for it. You knew he really couldn’t have anything too filling today, and he’d get mad if you didn’t eat something substantial, but from everything you were reading Spencer couldn’t really have anything. There were suggestions of freezing protein shakes for him to suck on, he could have popsicles and jello, which should be fine with him, and he could have clear lukewarm broth. It was recommended that he avoid dairy for a time, and with the way Spencer’s stomach reacted to it before, it seemed to be a safe bet that it had to stay out of the fridge. You began prepping for later though, pureeing chicken, apples, oatmeal, pretty much anything nutritious that could be consumed later on.

You heard the bell rang as you were putting another ice cube tray of edibles in the freezer. Wiping your hands on your shirt you came out to see him sitting up. “You okay? You want a popsicle or something?”

He shook his head, revealing a deck of cards in his hand. “Oh, cards, huh, I don’t know you always cheat.”

The rasp escaping him said he was trying to defend himself, you giggled raising a hand up. “Calm down, I was only teasing, Spence. Though I don’t know how it’s a challenge for you when you always win. Let me change into some night clothes though, I got some broth going, we can both eat in our pajamas if you want.”

He shrugged, still shuffling the cards. He looked like he was thinking, and you couldn’t help but scoot in next to him. Placing a hand on his shoulder. “You okay?”

The way he looked at you, it stirred something inside, and you couldn’t put your finger on what you would call the feeling. Was this longing? Love? Fear? You couldn’t decide, not even as he got up and went to his room.

The next several nights went well, except now the sun was blinding you, the curtains not being drawn together last night. You groaned and went to shut them, seeing Spencer had already gotten out of bed. He had been so quiet lately, he had seemed distant from you. You wondered if it was just because he couldn’t speak, so much of his personality came out when he could speak. His hands and face coming to life when he as on a topic he was passionate about, it was hard to see it taken away, no matter how temporary. He had to feel something in that, too, it was hard for him to express himself and now not to have speech there. Getting dressed you made your way to the kitchen, finding Spencer about to down a cup of coffee.

“Spencer!”

Startled, he dropped the mug to the floor. “What are you doing? You can’t drink that hot! It could mess up your throat.”

You went to clean up the mess almost banging into Spencer as you both lent down. You smiled. “I got it, Spence.”

“Let me help. You know it’s been several days. I can have coffee.”

“We can call the doctor if you want, but I made you some iced coffee in the freezer for now if you want.”

He laughed, and though it still sounded shrill it was a definite improvement to what it was before. He talked more now, though taking long pauses in between to rest his throat. “Why do you always contradict what I say?”

“I do not.”

“Not always, but a lot of times, you do. I’m not saying it’s bad, I like it, it’s one of the things I love about you.”

You seized up, the word was hard for Spencer to say from all his experiences and for it to be aimed at you was something even if it was a different meaning than it was before in the hospital. You stood up and smiled. “I have many things I love about you too, Spence, but you’re still not getting any hot coffee right now. You want some oatmeal?”

He was giving you that look again, the one that made you shudder in three different ways. “You should probably go lay back down, Spence.”

“You know you’re the only other person beside JJ to call me that? No one else uses my first name either.”

“I guess with everyone using last names all the time, it’s kind of an unwritten formality.”

“How come you say my name then?”

Your mouth gaped open and closed. You weren’t really sure why, one day you came into work and looking at him you decided he was more than Reid. Your body flushed. “Because you mean more to me.”

Spencer licked his lips, inching his way closer to you. You weren’t sure if you should move back or not, freezing yourself in place. “You mean a lot to me too. I – I know you want to forget, Y/N, but I can’t.”

“Forget what, Spencer?”

His eyes went down, almost disappointed. “I know you were only doing it so I would go to sleep, but what you said, it, it meant something to me. I was hoping…but…I don’t know, I guess I was wrong.”

“You mean at the hospital?”

He was getting upset now, his hands fidgeting by his sides. “Of course I mean the hospital.”

“I really didn’t think you remembered that.”

“I’m sure that would’ve been a relief to you.”

Anger flared in you for a second. “Oh, no, don’t you dare try that Spencer Reid. I thought with the sedative it was a drunk confession and you didn’t really mean a lot of it, that, yes, you would forget. It doesn’t mean I wanted you to. I just…I didn’t want to lose my friend if I’m wrong.”

Spencer’s eyes softened at your confession. “Why would you lose me?”

“You could’ve forgotten all about it and I would’ve looked like a total loser if I said anything, second what if we did go out and you realized it couldn’t work, I still want this, to be able to be with you.”

Another step. “Who’s to say that would happen, I’ve known you for few years Y/N, we’ve talked about so many highs and lows in our lives, witnessed and conquered so many evils, I can’t see anything but this working.”

“Can you really see it, Spencer?”

“Yes.”

Such a short answer and with the most impact. “I do, too.”

Spencer’s eyes lit up, his hair flopping back into his face, and you reached out and pushed it behind his ear. He took your hand, pulling you closer. Without a word, he bent down brushing his lips on your gently, before diving in deeper. He pushed his tongue deep in your mouth, and pulled back surprised.

“You don’t have tonsils?”

You laughed. “Nope, got mine out when I was four, thank you.”