#relationship talking

[innercityforestfire]

After I visited the ex one time when I noticed she was having a rough time before shit got way worse than it is now, I cleaned her house well and started telling her all the dad things like she needs to eat more and I could tell she'd been sleeping on the couch and she should sleep in her bed, ya da ya da yada... anyway I remember after I said those things she just kept looking at me with the old small smile I remember from when we first started dating and I asked her

Me: What? Why are you looking at me like that?

Her: (silence. Then...) I don't deserve you.

Me: No... You don't. And you probably never will.

And really its the truth. I was too good to her and as much I wanted her to, she'll never appreciate me the way I deserved to be. And... it felt really good to say that. Cause we both knew I was right.

[transbuckys]

this is only under a cut for length feel free to read i just don't wanna clog yr dashes

lynn and i are both rlly okay with dating another person 

and realistically it's not going to happen like me and lynn(where we are together online for a month and then move in together) b/c that was a special circumstance

and i'm good with that!!! i want to experience like regular dating where we don't see each other all the time because i've only ever done that once

(not counting my long distance relationships b/c those are also kind of special circumstances/not what is considered "regular dating" although those were rlly nice too and i'm open to another ldr)

tl;dr i don't want to go through the process of getting used to another person in my space 

not until i'm in college and away from my parents(and financially we couldn't do it anyways but that's not relevant to the point)

and then i'd be okay with that.

but i'm still cool with dating other people(i'm actually kind of wanting a third again i have a lot of love and i like lots of variety in my relationships but i am happy with just lynn too tho)