35. How does your character behave around people they like?
“I’d have t’like people fer that t’be even a remote possibility.”
This is something of a hard question to answer given the significant trust and faith issues Roman has towards people. Definitely hard enough for him to avoid being candid about it. He’s generally quick to describe human nature as fickle and is quick to remind himself that people are animals too.
I don’t think he considers himself different in this regard, but that only makes his feelings more complicated and the usual forms of interaction aren’t necessarily the same with him. Just like him, they’re subject to change and may read differently on the outside from what’s going on internally. So it has actually taken me a long time to figure out what actually shifts openly about people he cares for.
The main rule of thumb for him is treating people like people. He can come to like just about anyone characteristically, and come to dislike them just as quick but he won’t necessarily know unless he interacts. He likes to make the time he spends with people feel important, no matter their particular importance to him on a wider emotional scale.
For him, its about what’s inspired in little moments with that person so even the slightest things he might like can be incredibly engaging for him -- which can give the appearance of him being far closer to something than he actually feels. He’s had plenty of even recent conversations with people he really liked, and at the same time felt absolutely certain those moments were limited. These kind of thoughts really temper how much he’s willing to let himself be excited about, which limits what he’s willing to show.
The amount of time he spends with someone is also not necessarily an indicator. He’s spent a lot of time with people he’s hated, and next to no time at all with people he’s loved and its not in his nature to remain in one place for long unless he has to or feels particularly comfortable.
The people close to him will often find him likely to disappear for long bouts of time only to reappear as if nothing happened. It’s not an unexpected thing at this point. No one considers things wrong if he disappears even if there might be and he very much prefers that on some level. So on the surface, nothing really shifts in his behaviors towards people he likes outright and its a very pointed thing.
What changes about when he likes a person really is just internal, and overall reluctant. I think he makes a conscious effort at this point not to make things a big deal, or to not make super obvious overtures about how he feels towards friends having gotten used to people taking advantage of the things they know or think they know.
He bites his tongue often and maybe with enough trust, it starts to loosen some towards deeper subjects. If you’re a friend of his, he’s probably at least a little willing to admit when you’ve upset him, as opposed to simply leaving or bottling the emotion. A little.
He’ll engage personal spaces a little more without looking so awkward in them. This can be how he acts within a home, or how he interacts with a person. He has a tendency to avoid groups as a whole, and will typically be the most distant in a meeting and closest to the door. Comfort becomes obvious if he’s willing to take a seat, and share a drink in a space that isn’t his own. He’ll let people he likes invade his space a little more, or sit closer to them when he can.
I think the biggest indicator is more so how much he lets a person get away with around him. If he really likes you - he’s incredibly forgiving. He’ll ignore a lot of his own personal comforts to give that person the utmost freedom around him. He’ll let a lot slide even on a moral scale, as long as it isn’t impacting anyone else but him.
This isn’t something he necessarily notices, and can develop rose-colored lenses for situations that really aren’t good for him. It’s led him to overlook a lot in the past and often times the damage for him had already been done by the time he discovered the error.
TLDR; In the spirit of aggressively avoiding disappointment, he makes a pointed effort to appear equally in like or out of like with everything and to ever really see that change, it takes a significant amount of time and patience that most rarely get to discover.
Sorry this took so long to answer it was way, way harder than I expected it to be!
