Remembering you
Sometimes... it’s simple like the way the warm summer air and heat touches my skin as I’m driving that remind me of our car rides, road trips, mudding adventures in your Jeep or simply the way we’d lock eyes for a couple of seconds more times than not lol and me knowing that you were the only thing in this world that mattered to me and seeing no one else around but you. Knowing with every fiber of myself that I wanted nothing more than just you forever.. every single ounce of you. Every fucked up crazy beautiful part of you. And of course I could never forget the passionate steamy intense nights and days we shared together. And then sometimes... it’s the quick but lingering moments and emotions at times that all come flooding back in at once that consume and take over my whole entire being to the point where I don’t know what to do with myself or how to feel and I zone out for a minute having to snap out of it and come back down to reality. The kinds of moments and memories that come out of no where and take over my mind and body making me feel like I have a pit in my stomach, this crazy feeling in my chest, and butterflies all over again like I did day one of us and making me stop right in my tracks having to take a deep breath like for example, the wind. Sounds stupid I know, but when I feel the wind flowing through my fingers as they’re dangling out of the car window so easily while driving god does it make me remember how I literally could feel you running through my veins with everyday that went by, like I couldn’t possibly get anymore close to you, or enough of you or remembering our first kiss and first time together being so nervous but so sure just not wanting to fuck anything up or look stupid. I guess sometimes, I just miss the way we felt and think about it often. How effortlessly we flowed. Or the very first time I laid my eyes on you when you walked through my front door wearing your grey Nike hoodie, khaki pants and green winter jacket with your hood up being in such awe by your beauty. God your fucking beauty. And that smile. Will always forever be my favorite.
