oh golly i hadn't even thought about those guys but ok yeah let's do it!! fair warning though i'm just making it up as i go along
(this is kind of a long read but i tried to break it up with images)
stanford pines
i… i mean, he should probably act like a crazy stage mother—that was my first thought—but what i like about stan is he has a big soft dingus heart. that's the appeal of his character, at least for me: he's a jerk, but he genuinely loves the twins and he's doing everything he can to protect them and give them a good life.
so maybe…maybe he's trying to protect mabel and dipper from their awful parents, who lavish them with french manicures and sequined capes, who torture them with hairspray and clip-on teeth. (in this AU, i imagine the whole pines fam has lived in gravity falls for some time, because it's a cool reversal of the canon kids' wide-eyed newcomer dynamic).
stan, on the other hand, is a major hardass and he refuses to spoil them. he knows they resent him for it, and it breaks his heart, but he truly believes he's helping them be better people and that one day they will thank him for it. he may be right.
wendy corduroy
wendy, wendy, wendy. sultan of femme, princess of butch. my sin, my soul
my interpretation of this AU hinges on socioeconomic class in a major way. i feel like wendy would be right in the thick of all the class warfare.
canonically, even though it's never addressed outright, she's kind of poor. i feel like the revfam would constantly be trying to simultaneously uplift and destroy her. like, they'd offer her a decent salary at the tent of telepathy, they'd promise her upward mobility, and then they'd turn around and bring in a huge logging company to put her dad out of a job. the pines may be new money but that won't stop them from using old-money tricks.
anyway wendy is not impressed by their persistent west egging but she needs the money so she works for them. she doesn't hate them; in fact, she thinks they're kind of funny, sometimes even unironically, but most of the time she takes a position of wry bemusement. she has a lot more in common with gideon and they become good friends!
i don't think gideon would develop romantic feelings for wendy, though. it would honestly be a lot funnier for me if he still had a crush on mabel. that's really hilarious to me idk
ok sorry i keep sneaking 30 rock in here but that's them. that's rev mabel and gideon's relationship in its entirety
soos
soos is exactly the same across all timelines because soos is eternal
no no j/k. i mean, he would act exactly the same but i think his relationships with certain characters may change.
i think he'd still like the twins; he thinks they're seriously cool and classy because he doesn't know any better, and they like to scold him and belittle him and make him carry them everywhere. he has a thin skin when it comes to their bullying, but they always apologize afterwards so that they can keep getting away with it. he always accepts their apologies, no matter how disingenuous.
and he would of course think gideon and pacifica are just the bee's knees. he's the only one fooled by pacifica's ridiculous pretense of maturity and groundedness, but hanging out with soos would help her stop trying to grow up so fast. and soos would LOVE gideon's folksy platitudes and pollyanna-ish outlook on life.
he would always be trying to get the kids to get along, like "you guys are my best friends it's so weird that you never hang out!!" and stan would smile inwardly because when he met gideon and pacifica, he thought, "these are good kids. these are the kids that can turn mabel and dipper around, these are the kids they could be."
and they may even get along sometimes because pacifica and dipper are both huge nerds pretending to be more worldly than they actually are and because gideon and mabel are both so perky and they always smile, even when they don't feel like smiling. oh my god what is happening
