I move to Stockholm in one week - WHAT AM I DOING!?
I move to Stockholm in two weeks... 6 months ago I literally lost everything. Here’s the story of how I rose from the ashes, under the shadow of a global pandemic. There is light in the darkness. You just have to find it.
...Fear, excitement, regret, apprehension, wonder, pride… some of the words that run through my head when I begin to think about my upcoming move to Stockholm.
‘What am I doing?’ Is the question that crops up the most.
The answer? I have no freaking clue what I’m doing. Which is something I have had to come to terms with. I used to plan everything. Plan for planning, plan the plan to make the plan to plan… plan. I was forever living for the future and completely overlooking the time that was passing me by. I lost so much life wishing for future events. To the point where I wasn’t enjoying myself. I was living in a far of land and forgetting about the only time we ever really have - the present moment.
“...surrender control and letting the ebb and flow of life...”
I’m still not great at it but I’m trying to surrender control and letting the ebb and flow of life wash over me and pull to the places I am supposed to end up. Rather than trying to orchestrate every small detail and getting lost in the process.
This letting go of my control was sparked by the beginning of 2020 – and it probably came at the best time, as the world as we knew it came crashing down. Not only was the world submerging into chaos, my personal world was also being flipped on its head. In the space of the two months, my 4-year relationship ended. I lost my home, my dog and the life I had created for myself. Not only that but… I also lost my job, right before the pandemic hit. It was at this moment I realised we never really have control over anything. It’s an illusion, nothing we plan for will ever be how we think it is going to be. There are so many factors that are beyond or grasp it’s impossible to know what is ever going to happen and trying to hold on to it often causes more harm than good.
“...lost my home, my dog and the life I had created for myself. Not only that but… I also lost my job...”
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying I just sit by and do nothing – inaction won’t lead you anywhere either - it will prevent you from evolving. So, as soon as I lost my job I hustled. I was able to use my overactive, planning mind to find an alternate income source, in the space of two days. Yep, my survivor’s brain kicked in and I was able to save myself. It wasn’t exactly what I wanted but I was able to use my skills to get myself out of hot water. Proving that sometimes even perceived negative traits can be repurposed.
Like I said the job wasn’t exactly what I wanted but it was in an industry I enjoyed, and I thought I’d give it all I had. Which I did. But it was hard moving into a role I knew nothing about. In the midst of giving up, I got a phone call, completely out of the blue from the directors. I thought, this is it, they’re not happy with what I’m doing, and I’ll have to find another job. But in my new mindset I though, this is fine I’m just not on my path. Little did I know they were about to pick me up and place me back on it. They offered me the role I had been working towards for 3 years (after leaving design). I was blown away.
Life has a way of turning up for you when you surrender to it.
Not only did the give me the job I wanted, they also asked me to move out to Stockholm to work with them in their head office. Something that I have only ever dreamed about. An opportunity of a lifetime that only ever happens to a small group of people… and I was one of them.
So... I journal as part of my regular practice (off and on, I’m not particularly regimented!) but I found that when I’m struggling to find the light it’s useful to rest of someone else’s words and stories. In makes me feel connected. That things will work out. The path is not a straight line and I’d hope with my posts I can help someone realise that too.
So, this imperfect soul greets another… welcome.
I hope this encourages you walk your path and helps you believe anything is possible when you just let go to the natural rhythm.
Let’s rise inward.
Chelsea x
Join me in Instagram: @chelsea.plunkett_