Jul 29, 2024
THE 100 M.LIST
bellamy blake
boyfriend bellamy headcanons
clarke griffin
roan kom azgeda
octavia blake
seen from Lebanon
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Russia
seen from China
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Netherlands
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from Poland
seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from China
THE 100 M.LIST
bellamy blake
boyfriend bellamy headcanons
clarke griffin
roan kom azgeda
octavia blake
sunrise over the devil's revenge [ roan x you ] author's note: long time no post <3 i rewatched the 100 during my hiatus and my adoration for roan was reignited and so was my inspiration, it seems word count: 2333
Life could be beautiful, here at the end of the world.
When the sun broke apart from the horizon, precious honey golden beams dragged warm fingers across your skin and combed through the hair of your beloved. They were warm, those beams, kissing you awake in the glow of a new dawn, the bright star ascending slow and languid to draw the rest of Polis from its restless dreams.
Pure radiance, was the temperance of the sunrise, yet no rival was it to the crown prince of Azgeda, still sound asleep beside you. Head pressed to your shoulder he stirred as you did, when sunlight brushed over your lashes, traced the dip of your nose and the curve of your jaw. Even stuck in the crossroads between dreaming and waking, you felt him move away from you, though not enough to free his tangled limbs from yours.
A palm glided over your stomach, all gentle and calloused and adoring, tracing shapes and runes across soft skin. The touch began to awaken you further, pulling you from the embrace of sleep into the embrace of Roan, still half confined to the realm of dreams himself. And yet, with eyes as blue as the tumultuous sea, he watched you with a contentment that he has never felt anywhere else, has never felt with anyone else. They met your own as they slowly - ever, so slowly - blinked back the remnants of the night. The sun was bright, those golden streams still caressing your cheekbones, harshly imposing themselves through eyelids now scrunched up against this luminous, unwelcome awakening.
Next to you, Roan laughed rich and smooth, voice still a bit discordant from sleep. You felt it roll through his chest pressed to your side, heard it low in your ear while you adjusted to the contrast of the - was it truly morning, already? Dawn was still young, yet your bones felt the whispers of last night clinging tightly to your memories as if no time had passed at all. You swore it had been mere minutes since you had fallen asleep tucked into Roan's side, his fingers tracing shapes and swirls along your spine just as he had been doing a moment ago.
Gracelessly, and without sparing him another look, you groan and burrow deeper under the covers. "It can't be morning already."
The hand on your stomach ceased the comforting movements. He huffs another laugh, soundless this time. You burrow deeper into his chest, your own heart filling with warmth when you hear the amusement in his voice. "Only just."
You hum, a soft smile pulling up your lips when knuckles begin to trace your cheekbone, down the dip of your nose, along the curve of your jaw, the column of your throat. Your eyes flutter open then, adjusted now, to the bright welcome of the sunlight illuminating ruined, rotting wallpaper and scuffed wooden floors. Your prince - enamored with you, always - in the midst of it all. Those impossibly blue eyes are clear as they meet yours for the second time this morning, and for a moment - fleeting, as it is - you catch a flash of the bitterness he keeps buried deep and guarded close; something that lingered loud and jagged and unspoken between you, in contented silences such as these.
In reality, the precious nights you spent together were never meant to exist. Tensions were high past these walls, outside of this room; Roan was still very much royalty, and Queen Nia was still very much Queen Nia. Everything was a distraction for the Crown Prince of Azgeda, and unwavering loyalty was what she commanded. There was no doubt that anything other than carrying out her schemes for Ice Nation's ascension would get in the way of her projected success.
You were one of those threats, distracting Roan so. Both of you knew that's how this would be perceived, but you were careful. He was careful. It was a necessity, if not for your very safety, then for the sake of what little sanity his mother had not yet stolen.
"Tell me then, Prince Roan," you begin, pushing yourself onto an elbow. You reach to take his hand in your own, holding it safe and sound against your chest. "Is the sunrise as beautiful as you?"
Roan blinked. Scoffed at the teasing sincerity of your voice, still colored with sleep. Pulled his hand away from your touch and ran it through sun-kissed curls. Even though he broke eye contact with the movement, you caught the beating heart of a smile he tried to hide by slipping to the edge of the bed. His gaze turned toward the windows across the room, yet you lingered on him, and the way tension began to slip across his shoulders like a cloak made of promises.
"I wouldn't know," he says, tone playful in contrast with how he held himself, how he was already beginning to pull away from you, if only just a little. "It's a shame anyway, because they're rarely as divine as you."
As he spoke, a balmy breeze swept through the windows then, rustling the furs still draped across your skin. The laugh Roan pulls oh, so seamlessly from you is carried on the wind, dancing around this little space you call home. It fuses deep and steady with the time you have left in each other's company. It's limited, now that the sun rises higher with each given breath. It's something you push away when you crawl to his side and press a kiss to his shoulder.
"We'll see about that," you say, voice stolen away by his skin. Your lips linger for a moment longer, feeling, ever so slightly, a small thread of tensity unravel from Roan's shoulders for as long as you stay. You would have missed it, had you not been allowed to learn every tell, every way to read your prince the way he had been allowed to learn you.
Another laugh falls through his lips and into yours, as he guides you up to meet him in a kiss that's soft, and another one that's sweet. You pull away with a lazy smile still dripping repose, and drift to the windows and the sunrise beyond.
With a smile in his voice, he says, "Tell me how right I am when you finally catch your breath."
And, well - you failed to, wholly, completely, tremendously - because Roan was right about one thing, at least. Your hands fluttered along the windowsill, textured stone rough under your fingertips to ground you down, down, down to remain tethered to this one, single moment because, oh.
It was breathtaking, this sunrise careening through the sky beyond. It was all vibrant amber dancing with deep coral against the horizon. Strong crimsons embraced bittersweet violets streaking along the treeline as they swept through boughs and branches of laced leaved canopies. It was nature's version of hide and seek, you thought idly. And then your eyes drifted up, and it was enough to draw a startled breath through your teeth, lips parting in awe as you beheld the clouds, wisplike ghosts swirling rich plum-colored shapes that were too, awash in the golden accouterment of the rising sun. The velvety midnight hues were being chased away right before your eyes it seemed, painted into nothing by the saturated paintbrushes of the ancient gods of old.
They've revealed themselves once again, here at the end of all things.
The unfiltered beauty of it all is enough to deepen the cracks coiling out from your heart with new ones beginning to shake themselves awake, separating once more, from the parts of yourself that understand this kind of life is anything other than hell. With every reminder, every breath of life breathed back into your soul, the heartache ran deeper and the rage propelled them farther because there was still raw, radiant love in this world and it was looked upon with scorn.
And yet, somehow -
You found peace even here, in your home built upon ruins, built among the bones of Polis itself. A contrast stark and deadly against the brightness of the careless sky. A reminder, that life was not always war and blood and betrayal and the lingering fear of losing your life in your bed, in place of the ones you held most dear.
It was jarring, these moments. They've been such a rarity since the meeting of Skaikru and Grounders all those months ago.
And yet, you had Roan. The Crown Prince of Azgeda who pulls you back from the precipice of losing yourself in the disarray, the neverending conflict that seeps into the cracks of your bones, your soul, threatening the only way of life you've ever known. Uprooted unceremoniously by the melting of your many cultures, just like everyone else.
War was always a breath away, these days.
He arrives when you need him, always - your prince, your friend, your love - anchoring you to this moment here at your window, as he slips arms around your waist to hold you steady, resolute, calm. He pulls you backwards to find relief leaning against his chest. Perceptive, always, was your prince. Ardent, was he, always. Always, yours and yours and yours.
You wonder, not for the first time, if you will be his undoing. You, his moonlight in the night mooring him to steady land as the chaotic current rages between his head and his heart, his crown and his resolve. You, the one to shatter his claim, forever.
"I'm going to assume by your silence that for once, you're too stunned to speak," he says quietly. Says it with head dipping to rest heavy on your shoulder. It's a comforting weight, this. A kiss, chaste, is pressed to your temple. Though what stuns you, always, is the way he lines the hard contours of his body with tenderness, weaving radiance and serenity through his words when you're alone. "I'll remember this forever, you know," he needles, "as the day my lover finally falls silent for once in their lives."
Something stirs in your chest as he teases, and it's warm, it's warm, it's warm - but above all, it's what you imagine it might feel like to be safe, truly, in all possible facets of this word built on rocky soil, pieced together with fragile foundations. What's worse - when you notice not only how easily your walls crashed down around your Roan - of course you notice how his barriers of iron ice bloody vengeance tumble into dust at your mere breath filling his lungs. So you faltered, if only a little.
It was all so unpolished, this thing blooming between you.
Roan noticed, of course. Felt your body gain a little more balance of its own, drawing away from the strength he shared with you willingly - he felt it, wracking open the deepening fractures in his chest that he thought you had begun to heal. He held tighter, but only enough for you to notice, for you to stop pulling away from him to gently - always, ever so gently - melt back into him piece by cauterized piece.
He wondered if this was what love only ever was - this fragile, secret thing. Strength in privacy, dangerous while observed.
Except how could something so bright be so fatal?
He questions this, when a laugh, smooth and saccharine spills through your lips. It's effortless, always, around Roan. He notices that too, of course, and it's never lost on him how much easier it is to laugh around you as well.
"You know you're the worst, right?"
Your elbow collides with his ribs, in which he shakes against you with a soundless laugh, breath warm and comforting as it cascades down the column of your throat, tumbles across your collarbone to be swept up in the breeze gone cool, gone just a bit too chilled, as it glides through the windows to coast around your bodies entwined into one. The sun climbs higher in the distance, casting this secret solace into partial shadow, yet the rest continues to remain gilded golden with the glowing sunlight. It blended freely with the vibrant euphoria of a morning spent together, if only until the city began to stir.
And, like always, it happens sooner rather than later.
"I should go," his gaze falls past you, past the alleyways and fallen stone structures beyond the open windows. He acts like looking anywhere other than your eyes will erase the dread creeping up his spine at the thought of leaving you, once again, to slip into his own quarters only to embrace a role that's never fit him as well as you do.
"Yes," you agree. All intonation of your contentment crawls off to the shadows still growing in the corners of your room. They held your heart in a grip of bone, their icy darkness prying open the chasms carving deeper into your soul all the while. "It would be wise if you did."
Roan pulls away, regret gnawing at his heart within seconds, minutes, breaths. He leaves you standing in front of your sunrise fading into blue skies and white, gauzy clouds. You're motionless, not turning to watch him leave as the door clicks open, creaking shut as he pulls it closed behind him.
You always watch him go. Always smiles wide and adoring as he steals one last parting kiss. Yet, today is different. He feels it as he enters his own cold, darkened quarters, feels it fuse into the marrow of his bones and thrum through his blood as it pulses hard and fast through the fissures in his lungs.
He won't see you again, Roan thinks. He's not sure how he knows, but he feels it; that sure presence looming tall and fierce stalking him the same way one does on a battlefield. He thinks about slamming his fist into the wall. Thinks about placing his mother's head on a pike outside the walls of Polis.
He should have told you he loved you.
I’m dropping by and saying that the latest chapter in Banished is amazing as always! There’s going to be some stuff going down between Roan and Bellamy I know it lmao I can’t wait... thank you! Have a good day!
Hooray! Thank you! I’m excited for Jealous Bellamy to make a bigger appearance 😂 Especially with Roan trusting Y/N 😂
~Part 46~
Friend Like Me (Bellamy x Roan x reader)
Requested
Summary: Bellamy becomes overprotective of his girlfriend, Y/N when Roan shows interest in her.
Pairing: Bellamy Blake x reader, Roan x reader
Title Reference: Friend Like Me x Wayne Wonder
Word Count: 792 words
Warning: swearing
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‘Babe, are you okay?’ Bellamy rushed towards me as I breathed heavily after fighting off chipped people that was about to kill all of us.
'Yeah, is A.L.I.E shut down for good?’
Bellamy nodded and then hugged me tightly, 'We’re safe now.’
'Take Skaikru as prisoners!’ Trikru villagers screamed, 'They’re the reason why many of us died!’
After A.L.I.E nearly took over the final human race on Earth, I don’t blame them being angry at us. Jaha went to search for the City of Light and he succeeded. Unfortunately, it wasn’t glorious as it sounded.
Instead he brought back a chip, A.L.I.E that took over people’s minds when they swallowed it. It was a way of the system brainwashing people and killing thousands of people.
'What are we going to do?’ Clarke said, worried about Skaikru. I wouldn’t be surprised if people planned to keep us as prisoners, or even kill us.
'No need for that.’ Roam popped in outside of Polis as all the other villagers surrounded him. 'I’ll take care of you guys.’
An angry villager stomped towards Roan, 'Are you serious? Because of them, hundreds of our people died.’
'Because of them, a thousands of us were saved.’ Roan added. He turned to me and smiled. 'If it wasn’t for you, we’d lost more people if not, all of us.’
Bellamy scooted closer to me. 'Thanks Roan, we got it from here.’
'Well, he’s saving us from being slaughtered. Is there anything we can do for you guys?’
'Uhm actually, I’d like to talk to you privately if you don’t mind.’
Murphy then whistled, flashing cheeky grin; He had made everything awkward. As I followed Roan into Polis Tower, I heard Bellamy and Murphy bickering from behind me.
'Thank you again, by the way.’ Roan grinned, 'I really appreciate everything you’ve done for us.’
'Of course. In a time like this, we have to work together. In my opinion, it’s silly we are all still enemies.’
'I agree.’ He stood closer, 'You know Bellamy is really lucky to have you.’
Lightly blushing, I scratched my forehead. 'Thank you, I guess.’
He took my hand. 'No, thank you. It’s a small progress but because of you, some of the clans are a little more tolerable. We’re slowly uniting.’
'I’m only doing what I think is right.’ I smiled lightly and slowly pulled my hand away.
Roan’s eyes widened as his cheeks turned red. 'Er, I’m sorry about that. I don’t mean t-’
'No, don’t worry about it. It’s fine.’
'It’s just-’ Roan paused, unable to put his thoughts into words. 'I just wish I’d realized sooner how great of a person you are. I know it’s too late for that but I really want you as more than a friend.’
His honesty made me blush hard, flattered that Roan thought of me in a romantic way. Even though he was generally a great and understanding person, Bellamy was the one for me.
'You don’t have to tell me anything, I know.’ Roan chuckled, 'I’m jealous of Bellamy.’
I laughed, 'He is a great guy.’
'Yep, I know. That’s why I can’t even be mad that you two are together. I’m glad that if it’s anybody, it’s him.’
'Everything alright here?’ Bellamy barged in, clearly upset about something.
Roan nodded, 'Yeah. I was getting ready to leave actually.’
'Why are you leaving now that I’m here?’ Bellamy took a step closer to him.
'Hey, it’s oka-’
'It’s not alright, Y/N.’ Bellamy huffed as he interrupted me. 'If he has something to say, he should say it now.’
He smiled sweetly, 'I actually don’t have anything to say because there is no competition. It’s clear that Y/N loves you and you love her. I can’t do anything about that.’
'I-I… Oh.’ Bellamy’s eyebrows raised, surprised to hear something so unexpected from Roan. 'Yeah. Uhm, alright then. Sorry, man.’
'Take care, Skaikru.’ Roan said before he walked off.
Bellamy turned to me quickly and panicked, 'Murphy whistled when you guys came in here and made it so dramatic. I started overthinking and-’
As I smirked, I pressed my lips against his. He chuckled whilst kissing, happy that I wasn’t upset with him.
'What were you so worried about?’ I giggled.
'Uh, the macho king that obviously took interest in my girlfriend trying to take her away from me.’ He jested. 'Not to mention his nice hair and everything just was a plus to make me worry harder.’
Laughing loudly, I gave him a peck on his cheek for reassurance. 'Well, don’t worry okay? I’m yours.’
'Not unless I swoop in.’ Murphy peeked in with a devilish grin in his face. 'Watch out Blake, I’m coming.’
'You wish.’ Bellamy and I said in unison.
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taglist; @jodiereedus22, @coffeebooksandfandom, @bellamyblakemorley
Blood Colors - Chapter 17
Masterlist
Pairing: Roan x Reader
Warnings: None
Previous Chapter
Chapter 1
Roan glanced at the door impatiently, he couldn’t form a scenario in his mind where you wouldn’t show up but if he thought a little deeper he could, and none of those scenarios were good. He glanced back to Clarke, there was something uneasy about her that he couldn’t quite place. “Where’s Abby and Marcus?” He interrupted her. Clarke stiffened a little as she does when something is particularly painful. That’s why Clarke is so tense.
“Taken by Trikru.” Clarke admitted.
“Indra finally betrayed you, and now there holding your most important hostage.”
“That's why Trikru thinks we won’t try to take back Polis.” Clarke explained.
“What’s so valuable about Polis?” Clarke pulled a little box out of her pocket, battered and beaten, she slides open the top lid and picks something out. She brandishes the flame between her thumb and forefinger holding it up for them to see.
“This. This is what’s important.” Roan watches Clarke, she almost looms teary-eyed for a moment but as soon as she pockets the box with the flame inside the look is gone. Lexa is still very fresh in Clarke’s memory.
“So you want Azgeda’s help to take back Polis, what’s in it for us.” Echo pipes up behind him.
“You can rule over Polis until a new Heda can be selected.”
There’s a pause as he considers it, he can almost hear Echo running the risks behind him.
“On one condition.” Roan says finally breaking the silence after a pregnant pause. “We get to keep the flame until another commander ascends. When do we attack?”
“The day after tomorrow at dawn.” Clarke, Roan considered the conversation over, he turned to leave.
“Y/n left.” Clark said, both Roan and Echo turned back. “A messenger came to call her to you escorting party, they were attacked.”
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Echo relax, but he wasn’t so convinced. “Is the messenger still around?” Clarke nodded.
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It was set, they would ride hard and fast for the border where they left their escort party and they would send word to all the towns in the outskirts of Azgeda gather a small troop to be utilized on the day after tomorrow. Roan sat uneasy on the horse lent to him, a big fellow, able to take the weight of dense muscles and armour. He glanced at Echo who mounted up beside him on her own bay. “Chit’s sketchi. (Something is wrong.)” Echo whispered, Roan glanced back at the messenger who had deliver the message to you. Echo got the idea. Finally there was a load call the gates began to open. “If you betray me, Clarke, you will live to regret it.” Roan called loudly as he spurred his horse forward.
As if on cue, they stepped out from every nook, behind every tree. Roan gathered his reins and spurred his horse into a canter, he circled back, Echo followed and before the messenger could react, his head was on the ground. Echo halted, sword out, blood splatter everywhere on her. Roan was still on the move, he could hear the mass of Trikru now, gathering before the gates of arcadia. Before anyone could realise Roan stood in front of Clarke sword to her neck. He spotted, Bellamy then as she yelled for Roan and his black eye confirmed his suspicions further.
“Where’s y/n?” Roan questioned, Clarke’s throat bobbed, she couldn’t run, he would catch up in no time.
“She’s not yours to bargain and trade with.”
“She’s not yours either, she should be able to make her own decisions.”
“You’re marrying her, you’re placing a target on her back.”
“She’s had a target on her back since you sent her to Azgeda.” He would do it, he would kill her, she would feel her betrayal, dying slowly as she drowned in her own blood. He knew he could, y/n would be safe, they wouldn’t kill her for this.
Just when he thought all hope was last, a war drum sounded and Roan paused, he pulled back, spinning to face the sound as he watched his scarred white-faced warriors appearing.
“I told you, you would regret this.” Clarke stood uneasily, tensed.
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The room was in complete chaos when Roan entered, things were haphazardly strewn about and immediately as he sets his sites on you he understands why. You were tied to the cot riving and tugging at the bonds. Jackson was nursing a furiously bleeding arm, he could tell you were out of it, your head lulling to the side. “You sedated her?” He questioned furiously at Clarke, Bellamy stepped in quick enough. “She didn’t want to come willingly.”
“No shit.” Roan barked. Echo stayed with Clarke and Bellamy watching them carefully as Roan cut loose the bonds. “We’re leaving.” Roan said, as he scooped you up.
Roan sat you down on his bed, you were awake now, dizzy but somewhat conscious. “Roan,” you said again but this time your look was focused on him in a steady admiration. He hated that look, how could you still look at him like this when he had caused all this tension. It was almost unbearable but he held your gaze, steadying you as you swayed with a bout of dizziness. He watched your features grow pale and almost knew it before you said it.
“Bathroom.” Was all you could manage, Roan hauled you up, as you tried to keep the rising bile inside your body and rushed you into the on-suite. You collapsed in front of the toilet with as much grace as the situation would allow. And Roan was just in time to scoop your har out of your face before you wretched violently. You groaned, clearly feeling particularly awful. Whatever they gave was clearly short-acting as you slipped into your state of barely conscious again. He wasn’t about to call Clarke again, you'd just have to ride it out, he knew.
When you had clearly long finished your stomach emptying act, he moved you to the bed again. “You're so caring you know that.” You said with slurred speech and drowsy looks. “You would have made a good nurse. Ooh maybe a doctor, sexy doctor.” You informed him, voice lilting at the compliment, as your head lolled a little. He chuckled, if you had any recollection of the incident you were sure to be mortified and he wouldn’t neglect the opportunity to remind you when you were much less delirious.
“This isn’t my room.” You said, glancing around.
“No.” He confirmed.
You gasped, “Roan we’re not married yet.”
“Unfortunately, We’re not staying.” Roan said. He covered you with the blanket at the bottom of the bed, despite his words and before he was done you were gone.
You fight as much as you heavy limbs allow when they start dragging you down the cold stone hallway, you don’t know where you are but it feels wrong to even to your drugged mind. It’s like treading through water it leaves your muscles aching and you want to top fighting but you know you shouldn’t. A door is flung open and you can’t help but think ‘oh, no’. Every futile attempt at getting away makes you want to quit and you do when they chain you to the floor. Because there’s no use now, wide eyed, your steadying mind finally comprehends your situation. But you can’t believe it, you can’t think what they will do, why they’re cutting off your clothes. even as they start cutting at your pants. Your spirit is renewed when the cold wraps around your bare legs and you fight against limbs and chains. “No! Stop!” They mock your cries and laugh at your feeble voice thats dry and raspy. But you can’t stop them you realise, you’ve lost all control, and totally at their mercy your throat tightens and you can’t breathe. It feels like you are going to die, as you struggle for air, you’re chest screaming for mercy as your heart races. Surely this is what one feels like before you die. And then it starts, the pain, the real pain and it doesn’t stop.
The feeling doesn’t leave you, even as you sit up with no shackles around your limbs and none of those men around. What grips you is the cool evening air that hits your face. It's so dark, you can barely see in front of you, you feel like you can’t breathe, you sin searching for something and in the dark, your hand slides over something fury and solid which makes you jump back until Roan rolls over. He sits up immediately upon seeing whatever he sees, his fingers wrap around your wrist as he pulls you closer, slipping your fingers into his palm, you glance down and you can feel him as he rubs his thumb over your knuckles, it helps. You’re breathing calms as you try to take deep breaths, eyes connecting with Roan's. “Sorry we didn’t mean to move you while you were out but things got complicated.” He whispers, his understanding of your problem so clear when you only realise it at his words. But now as the adrenalin fades, the effects of the drug hit you like a fright time, nausea with a feeling that makes you feel like a boulder, like you can’t bear to sit upright much longer.
“I feel like I’ve been hit by space station.” You say softly. “What the hell happened at Arkadia?”
“Clarke betrayed us.” He could see your face turn into a bitter expression.
“What's new?”
“But I believe it was because Indra kept Abby and Marcus hostage.” Roan explained.
“What?” You asked alarmed, he could see you had a soft spot for the man that raised you, despite the fact that, to his understanding, he wasn’t the best roll model at the time.
“We believe they are being kept in Polis but we’ll send them back to Skaikru when this over.” Roan promised. “This scheme has set us back with Trikru, we killed a lot of their warriors.”
“And Skaikru?” He knew that painful worry, to fear for the people that reject you, that abandon you, he’s been there once.
“Some got harmed but I think you handed out more injuries yourself, you bit your healer, hard enough to draw blood.” Roan was clearly amused. “And Bellamy was sporting a deep blue eye.”
It felt satisfying but you wanted more, I mean how could they think to betray your kru, even if you didn’t choose Azgeda, they chose you and you hated that Skaikru- that Clarke just couldn’t accept that. After all- you weren’t some possession to be owned and kept safe when it aligned with someone’s interest. “It would be unwise and unlikely that we would align with Skaikru again, but we are going to take back Polis, that's where we are headed. As soon as we have the seat at Polis we will force them to submit to an alliance, unfortunately, the traitors' conditions might not be favourable for them.”
“Don’t you think that would go against Azgeda’s values? Forcing peace.”
“They will see it differently, a King ruling Polis with Jus Gona, the Fayalida and Wanheda at my disposal.”
“Is that all I am a trophy?” You ask genuinely curious but dreading the answer.
Roan sighed, “You know to me it’s not like that but it doesn’t mean I would use whatever means necessary to try and protect you. Being an object to Azgeda ensures a purpose, power, which means you hold value and the eyes of our people.” It was true, but maybe that was what it was supposed to be, even if the world saw you only as the worst part within you, at least to the people that care it was an entirely different story. “We leave early in the morning, lets get some rest, Polis holds a lot of challenges.” Roan said, lying down on the furs he laid out for him, you laid down on the bed made for you, it was close enough that you could reach out and touch Roan if you turned around and somehow his presence made it easy to fall back asleep.
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“Jus Gona.” You were awake at the words, instantly recognizing Echo standing above you.
“Wow Echo this is such an improvement, are you going to wake me up with breakfast in bed next?” You smiled at her, even half asleep your wit as sharp as ever.
“I can’t be seeing kicking the future queen of Azgeda.” She replied bluntly. “We’re leaving, your horse is saddled and waiting.”
You pulled yourself from the relevant comfort of your furs, rolling the thick skins up as boots stepped up in front of you, you slowly rose dreading facing the person that you knew it was. “Aleksondria,” You acknowledged as curtly as possible, you hadn’t seen her since that night it was declared that you would be marrying Roan.
“Don’t think you can get away with this for much longer, Jus Gona. The wedding wil happen in Polis.” She declared before turning on her heal and striding away at a quick pace.
Your fingers dug into your palms, as you glanced at Roan mounting his horse, you were lucky in one sense- you couldn’t deny it. Roan was a good friend and maybe you even liked him more than you do most, it was the best-case scenario for the circumstance but despite this, you were dreading it.
You quickly saddled your horse, making sure the girth was tight enough before you mounted up.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
Polis was beautiful when the setting sun fell on the large tower, it glowed against the painted background but it was also very desolate and that’s what made the setting sun so strange. Everyone was tense and waiting for the ambush which they knew would soon come, since there was no way, Polis had been completely abandoned. How many people would be coming at you was the whole other problem.
You we’re in the mix a separate, secure party with Echo on the lead that needed to find a way into the tower, you were glad to be useful at last after Roan and his men having to haul your ass on the back of a wagon for half the journey here due to Skaikru and there decisions. Your objective was to locate, protect and take any important enemy persons into custody for later negotiations. And you knew who you were going to find, your spite overpowered your dread of looking Abby and Marcus in the eyes as they realized what had happened. Sure Indra had really forced Skaikru’s hand into acting against Azgeda, but what the fuck had Clarke thought she could do with you? You bristled at the thought, following Echo down into the dark passages of the holding cells.
You’re eyes adjusted to the low light conditions the further you made your wat down the steps and soon you were glancing in every cell, searching faces of criminals to find who exactly you were looking for.
When the moment finally arrived it was much different from how you picture it. Instead of surprise, it was a different sort of look that reflected on their faces. “(Y/n) please let us speak to Roan if we can just-“ Marcus started.
“No.” Echo snapped coldly. “Confine them to a room in the palace, place four guards on them, they are not to leave their quarters.” She ordered the guards who stepped forward to unlock the cell and pull out the two leaders of Skaikru, you were more stunned than you thought you would be. They looked ragged, Indra really hadn’t been their friend this time. At the chance, Abby lunged out the guard's grips and took up your hands, in her own. Still frozen you could barely react but stare at her.
“(Y/n) please-“ Echo was quick to place a sword at Abby’s neck that had her relishing the hold on your hands to step back and away from the pressure of the sword pressed against her jugular, her eyes wide with fear. You opened your mouth to convey an order-
“Calm down.” Echo stated at you, immediately angered by her words. These were the people you thought of as-
“Take them.” Echo removed the threatening weapon as the guards left with them.
“Stop feeling.” Echo said when they were gone.
“Echo-“
She wrapped a skilled arm around your chest smashed you into the wall behind her, the blow was hard but the knee she thrust into your stomach was worse. You collapsed to the ground a wheezing, gasping, pained mess. You couldn’t even form a coherent thought as you fought for oxygen.
“That is the only way, they can hurt you.” With that Echo left you in the hands of your escort as she continued to the exit.
A guard helped you stood when you were ready to stretch upright.
“Are you alright, Jus Gona?” You nodded still unable to form any words.
Sure Echo was right, but fuck would you get her back for the painful lesson.
Next Chapter
Tag List:
@sunshine-and-riverwater @jinx-is-fire @silver424@cherrysfandom @thebookandmoviefangirl @that-cute-stranger @waitingtobeimpressed @daringvixon
Blood Colors - Chapter 16
Masterlist
Pairing: Roan x Reader
Warnings: None
Previous Chapter
Chapter 1
Clothes come off between kisses as soon as you reach your room, closer than his.
“You might punch me but are you sure (y/n)?” Cedree broke the kiss as your back hit the bed.
“Cedree, I am sure.” You say, clearly pronouncing the words, Cedree captured your lips between his again in a deep searing kiss, the two of you were almost bare and after so long without any real contact you felt your body responding as he crawled over you and pulled your shirt off. You pulled his underwear down and he was quick to pull yours down as you discarded your bra somewhere in the room.
Cedree pulled back and the site of his lust blown eyes as he looked you over was enough to make you all the more ready. Cedree didn’t wait long.
It felt like absolute bliss when he entered you, Cedree paused above you cursing loudly as you clenched around him, you chuckled as breathed into your neck to steady himself. Then he finally managed to regain himself as he kissed you again and started moving it felt good. It felt good until Cedree’s fingers brushed the mark on your forehead and then down your sides where some raised welts lie. And suddenly it wasn’t Cedree anymore, you breathing hitched and you threw the man above you off to sit up as you try to banish the image from your head.
“Was I that bad?” Cedree questioned, his hand sliding along your back in what was supposed to be a soothing gesture but only made you recoil as you curled in on yourself, bringing your knees up to your chest and sobbed.
“Hey, hey, hey.” Cedree slides closer across the bed but pauses when you flinch.
“I’m sorry, I’m not-I’m not ready yet.”
It seems to dawn on Cedree, “No it’s my fault, I should have been more considerate.”
“Cedree it’s not you,” though your mind screams for you not to, you wrap your hand around his in a reassuring gesture and squeeze and you feel all the better for it. He’s not Nire, you remind yourself, you’re safe and it’s okay.
“Well excuse me for a moment, if you don’t mind.” Cedree says sliding of the bed and disappearing, you don’t watch where he goes but you simply wrap yourself in a quilt and lie down, trying to ignore the lump in your throat that grows thicker and thicker and thicker until-
The bed behind you dips a while later and you turn quickly, only to catch sight of Cedree opening the covers.
“I thought you left.” You say, the lump in your throat dissipates a little. “I won’t be able to- at least not tonight.” You say.
“I know but I can’t leave you here alone, I’ll just be right here.” Cedree lies down on the bed facing away from you.
You’re able to relax a little even when you struggle to fall asleep. You knew that you had made the right choice by telling Roan that you would choose Cedree, you only wandered if Cedree would be happy.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
Today would be the day of the wedding and from tomorrow Roan would be away on honeymoon, leaving you to fend for yourself between the wolves. You had seen Roan at the official breakfast this morning, he didn’t look too pleased that the two of you were late. But further you had avoided him, after last night, he obviously had a very good idea of what transpired. You had so little time to spend with him but you just couldn't face him.
“Are you hiding from me?” Cedree popped into your room.
“Not exactly you.” You point out from where you are lying upside down on the bed.
“Roan?” You nod.
“Is it because of last night?”
“No!” You reject quite strongly, observing Cedree’s face, even upside down you could tell he didn’t believe you. “Maybe.” You said more softly, shifting your shoulders and closing your eyes. “Does it matter?” You question, looking at him again.
“Well, I’d like to dance with my prospective wife tonight at the wedding.” You sit up and turn around so fast you are almost dizzied by the action.
“He told you.” You almost exclaimed.
“He did, in fact, I feel flattered that you decided on me after just a few days,” Cedree said, a playful grin on his face, you threw a pillow at him.
“Of course we are not yet betrothed and even when we are we can still wait a while before proceeding, to learn to get to know each other.” Cedree said when he was done laughing.
“You want to?” You asked.
“Well, I know I’ve only known you a short while and it seems like we can get along well.”
“Marriage is more than just getting along.” You state.
“You were the one who jumped me so suddenly.” Cedree joked, you threw him with another pillow.
“I don’t want to feel obligated by what I need.” You say.
“(Y/n), I want this.” He said, finally serious. You threw another pillow at his face. “What was that for?!” He exclaimed, you shrugged.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
It’s painful as you wait with the groom on the dais, although there are many officials here with you, you feel alone. Roan glances at you but you are good at glancing away when he’s not looking, you can’t go anywhere, it would certainly be noticed. Echo stands not far from you, next to the king as his protector, his guard. The ceremony is peculiar, different from the one on the Arc, but shares some general principles. Tayla is lead down the aisle by her ward since she doesn’t have any parents, she comes to stand in front of Roan and they both are on their knees before ceremony master.
He takes a deep breath to start but the doors slam against the walls drawing everyone’s attention. Roan stands as Nire enters “What is the meaning of this?” Roan demands.
“Azgeda’s destiny is under threat.” It’s all dramatised words to entice the crowd as they gasp and mutter. Your heart begins to beat in your throat. He comes to stand at the foot of the dais. And maybe Roan lets him pause even when he could have had the guards drag him away and declare him a mad man due to his injuries. You notice the pause. “A destiny was laid upon me before my injuries, in a moment of my visions I saw another who would stand there.” Nire points to Tayla.
“Who is this person, pray tell,” Aleksondria says stepping forward as if she doesn’t know. You almost feel like you can’t breathe, Nire points to you. The whispers only increase but fade when Aleksondria speaks again “We’ll need proof that you are truly who this man says you are.” She looks at you expecting what? You simply shake your head dumbstruck as what to do, you look to Roan for help but he says nothing.
“Allow me,” Nire says as he climbs the steps, you try to fight him when grabs your arm, having been frozen in one place until he towers over you, he only digs his nails into your arm as you wince. “Let's give them a show.” He whispers against your cheek as he spins you around. He pulls a knife from his belt and your body screams at you to run. Nire runs the blade easily down the back of your shirt, the clothes tear apart, he stops at the base of your spine. The horror dawns on you but you don’t move, you can’t. There is a collective gasp.
You don’t notice what is being said until you are being pulled down the steps of the dais by those hand that digs further into your arm. It’s all you could do but clutch at your top to keep at least one thing to yourself. You are distinctly aware of the eyes watching you as you are dragged up the aisle and out the door.
When Nire finally lets go of your arm you gain some sense back, clutching your already bruised arm. “Did you have to do it like that?” Roan barks to Aleksondria and Nire, they must’ve followed you out. It’s then when you can finally move and think and the horror dissipates into anger. You don’t see anything until your fist lands the first blow across Nire’s face, you are straddling him on the floor and for some reason you keep going even though your fists screams in pain, Nire is out by the third hit but you keep going as his head limps to the sides and your hands are bloodied by his nose.
“Do something!” Aleksondria yells in panic at Roan. Echo is the one to drag you off, you don’t resist much. “We need a healer.” You rip out of Echo’s hold and you set off at a quick pace.
“The ceremony will be dismissed, the betrothal is announced.” Is the last thing you hear before you turn a corner and then sprint off in a run.
You slam the door to your rooms closed behind it and as a second thought push the dresser until it stands before the door. There is a big knot in your throat that refuses to release itself even as you take deep breaths. But you can fix this can’t you, you can un-ruin this for Roan.
You sob as you watch the blade heat up in the fire, letting yourself break for a moment. Your minds a mess of all the dark, and the light is gone. You feel so alone and scared but most notably you feel... unwanted. The banging at the door interrupts your sobbing, and you listen carefully glancing back to see the drawer you sifted in front hasn’t moved. “Y/n, open up.” You consider it for the moment but it's too late, you can’t go back to this, this time its been too far, you can’t do this anymore. If you could just burn these scars maybe they'd mean so much less, maybe you'd stop suffering at the hands of Nire. The blade glows before you and you pick it up, the tears blur your sight. “Y/n, listen, there is nothing you can do that will change this and I know that sounds like a bad thing but I’m here and I will need you for this.” It makes you pause and something inside you wills you to answer.
“I can’t do this anymore, I’m tired of disappointing everyone, I thought I wouldn’t here. I thought I could just be myself here but I don’t fit in.” You don’t have the will to keep your voice at the volume that he can hear for long, you don’t even know if he heard.
Anger and hatred flare up within you at no one else but yourself.
“(Y/n)!” You can hear the concern in his voice, then the door rocks against the drawer which gives an inch. You clutch the blade tightly, determination flaring up within you.
There's more rocking against the door as the drawer slides across the floor, you bring up the blade to your back, pausing when the sudden heat floods your skin mere inches above the flesh. You sob again as you try and will yourself to just do it, the pain will be blinding but it couldn’t last, it wouldn’t cut as deep as the pain you were feeling.
The thundering of footsteps echoes somewhere in the background and before you know it the blade is ripped out of your hands, it slides across the floor. Roan scoops you against his chest and everything about him envelopes you as you sob. He smells like perfumed a fresh cedar scent that is so familiar, his long hair that came loose from his braid slides into your blurry vision and god’s his warmth. “I ruined it, I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry.” Roan shushes you, only pulling you closer.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ROAN POV*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
He follows you all the way to where he knows you are going, the door is barred in and he immediately knows something is wrong. He knocks, or more like bangs on the door, “Y/n, open up.” He waits and he listens trying to think when would be the appropriate time to start hurling himself against the door and was he overreacting? He waits a few more seconds.
“Y/n, listen, there is nothing you can do that will change this and I know that sounds like a bad thing but I’m here and I will need you for this.” There’s a pause and then:
“I can’t do this anymore,” Roan exhales in relief “I’m tired of disappointing everyone, I thought I wouldn’t hear. I thought I could just be myself here but I don’t fit in.” He has to strain to hear the last part but the words only set his heart thumping in his chest even louder, dread filling him up.
It goes quiet again “(Y/n)!” He yells through the door and doesn’t think about it one second longer as he slams into the door, it gives slightly, he sees the dresser in front of the door. He slams into the door again and there is just enough space that he can peer around the corner of the door, he sees the hot glowing blade immediately and pushes the dresser as much as he can in the small space, then he squeezes past.
Roan doesn’t think when he reaches you, he grabs the blade by the most exposed part and tosses it behind him, even though his nerves flare up agony. Then he envelopes you and holds you as you sob into him. “I ruined it, I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry.” Roan shushes you, he wants to make it go away, all of it. He’s been so reckless with you and everything that landed to this is his fault, he knows it. He holds you until your shoulders silently shake, then keep holding you until tour tears run dry and only let's go long after the shaking has stopped. Then he wraps you in the fur on the bed and picks you up.
“What are you doing?” You ask softly, clinging to him as if you’re so afraid he'd drop you.
“You can’t stay here alone tonight.” Roan whispers close to your ear.
“Roan, I can-“
“It's okay, I’m here.” He simply says, you wrap your arms around his neck and he can barely think or breath with you so close.
“People will talk.” You whisper as a last, weak objection.
“Let them. We’re betrothed, remember.” He says.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
You don’t want to look up at the guards when you pass them, instead, keeping your face hidden in his neck. He sets you down on the bed and you let go of him, knowing your face must look a mess. You can barely look him in the eye.
“Roan I really am sorry.” You say again.
“This is not your fault.” He says firmly.
You could see something turns in Roan’s mind as he stares at you intently, you avoid his gaze, his grey eyes are so intent by the light of the candle on the bedside.
“Clarke has sent a request for us to travel to Arkadia.” Of all the things in the world.
“What?”
“I made arrangements to leave tomorrow. We need to discuss Polis, currently, Trikru is assuming that it's there and it might be that Skaikru had other plans. This might help us.” Roan said.
“What about me? What am I supposed to do?” You ask, swallowing thickly.
“Sometimes Skaikru and Azgeda don’t quite understand each other, maybe because you have spent time with both we might avoid any unwanted arguments.” Roan suggests.
“I’m going with?” Your question in disbelief. “Who else is going?”
“You, me, Echo and a few guards.” Relief washed over you with the force of a wave.
“This day has been long, we leave early tomorrow. We need to ride hard for the Azgedan border where we meet Skaikru.”
“Roan do you have a spare shirt for me?” He turns back and nods, digging in a drawer and pulling out a shirt. When you take it from him, you noticed the angry red marks on his palm. You take his hand and turn it over.
“I didn’t realise until I touch the blade.” Roan explains
“This is all my fault.” Roan is quick to pull you into a hug.
“Let’s go to bed, this day has been long.” Roan says softly.
As he undresses with his back turned to you, you redress. When Roan cones to sit on the other side of the bed with just his pants, you turn to him.
“It's my fault, all of this. I didn’t protect you but this, this gives me a chance to do better. I’ve failed twice, I know but there won’t be a third, I promise.” Roan says and you don’t know what to say, you’re already curled under the covers watching Roan settles himself down.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
“Listen I don’t need any disgusting squishy moments, especially tongue sucking.” Echo says to you as soon as she sees you. Your about to say something but Roan appears out of nowhere.
“We need to leave.”
Its barely light enough to ride when you mount, but there seems no time for waiting as Roan sets off at a trot, clearly intent with pacing the horses to get as many miles behind all of you as possible. For the first ten minutes, you squint at the ground trying to decipher harmless shadows from actual holes in the ground. On horseback, the journey is so much quicker but not particularly comfortable. Of course, your journey with Roan, nearly nine months ago had been the other way and it was thick winter by then. Now there were mere down drifts that left the nights harshly cold but they day relatively warm.
You don’t remember at which time you start recognizing the surroundings but as soon as you realize where en you are it sets a deep pit of fear in your stomach. You don’t particularly remember coming through these woods when you came to Azgeda but then again the place held very little significance. Back then these woods were like any other that you had come through, full of snow and pine-smelling. You honestly felt nauseous.
A branch cracked behind you, your stomach dropping as the horse you were on bolted forward a few paces, obviously jittery as you yielded him back into a slower pace which was simply cantering very skew and slowly with nerves. Clearly your feelings had been felt.
“I’m fine.” You say automatically as heads had whipped around at the sound of the horse hooves thundering, though when everyone settled their eyes back on the road you still kept a tight grip on the sword at your waist and glanced around to where the sound had come from.
“Calm down, your fueling your own fear.” Echo whispered lowly as she matched your speed. “Let go of your grip on the reins and talk to him, don’t give mind to what he spooked at.” She advised, you took a deep breath and loosened your reins a bit as you gave him a comforting pat. He fell into a trot though still tense, head raised. You nod to Echo in thanks focusing on your breathing as she trotted ahead. You couldn’t help but wait for the next scare, despite Echo’s words and your considerable efforts in relaxing, it never came.
Finally, you stopped when it became too dark to ride, tomorrow you would reach the border by lunch if you kept the same pace as today. Your camp for the night was a dry patch on a bit of higher ground. You had all managed to build a quick encampment for the horses and set up a fire before it was fully dark, and the food you had brought was quickly cooking on the fire as you collapsed to sit close. Your back was cramping and your butt hurt so much you contemplated standing but you were so tired. The temperatures were cooling at an alarming rate and you knew tonight would be cold but at least it was one night. No one was particularly inclined to staying up late, so with food in all your bellies and two guards on watched everyone settled down, huddled around the fire. Roan had rolled out furs not far from yours as he settled down, it was warm and cosy despite the uncomfortable ground below you when you settled down. “Roan what do you want to gain out of this? The meeting with Clarke.” You inquire. Roan lies facing the heavens a had thrown behind his head as if you weren’t sleeping in sub-zero temperatures.
“Because I am King of Azgeda and no Natblida have stepped up to claim the throne, the responsibility falls on me to take care of the throne but Trikru will stop at nothing to stop it.” Roans answer is very diplomatic.
“Do you think Skaikru is trying to secure an alliance with Azgeda?”
“I think they are.”
“And?” You question waiting for him to give his answer.
“(Y/n) because you are not Skaikru, it might do well for you to remember that Skaikru- Clarke, will stop at nothing to protect her people and because of Lexa and Indra, she is more inclined to consider then than she is to consider us.”
“But maybe-“
Roan interrupted before you could speak:
“Maybe its best if we don’t assume that Clarke won’t sacrifice you for the majority.”
It stung, but he was right. It didn’t hurt any less, but it would hurt less than not having thought of the possibility. Not really in the mood for conversation anymore you turned onto a different side and tried to fall asleep.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
The glum feeling didn’t leave even when the sun was well in the sky and you were almost there. “Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything.” Roan says when he falls beside you in one of the walking breaks. Your first thought is wishing you could just ignore him but it was an immediately followed by feelings of guilt. You sighed, Roan wasn’t a bad person for pointing out the truth, in fact, his intentions were good. “Sometimes people don’t want to hear the truth, maybe even though, it doesn’t feel like it right now, it needs to be said.” You say picking your words carefully, you didn’t want to say something that might give him the idea you were not entirely impressed with him, even if it was true. “It's just, I really didn’t think I would be on a side where I might be in this position. I thought-“ you stop yourself when your throat tightens. You breathed in, you were just tired and irritated, maybe a little broken and certainly not having it easy the past few months, you breathed out. “What's done is done.” You say it, in part, to stop Roan from giving you the ‘you-are-Azgeda-now-and-nothing-can-change-that’ speech and partly to yourself as a reminder. No one said anything then.
After waiting for a while the signal went up which you had been waiting for, so on Azgeda border the party mounted from where they had waited and road to where the signal was seen.
“What were you napping?” Echo asked once everyone stopped in-front of the Rover and van behind it. You hadn’t seen this baby in ages. Bellamy was lounging against the open door, not looking too impressed, beside him Miller.
“Azgedan guards, in the van.” Bellamy said. Skaikru had brought along enough guards that it clearly outnumbered their company sacrificing a comfortable ride home for tense squashed one, this was maybe not a good move, you thought. “No way, the King of Azgeda stays with his guards at all times.” Echo objected. “Either that or you walk.” Bellamy shrugged, Echo was about to argue further when Roan stopped her. He first turned two the two guards who would be staying to lead the horses back to an inn not far where they would wait for the company to return, however long it may be. He gave the two their orders and once they set off he turned back to Bellamy who was impatiently waiting. “I agree to your term.” He simply said. Echo you and Roan headed for the back of the Rover. Miller stopped you by stepping in front of you, your gut wasn’t so happy with the visit. “In front, there no space in the back.” There was not a friendly feature on his face.
“I can sit on the ground.” You answer but he simply kept pace with you as you tried to brush past him, blocking your path. Miller folded his arms a determined look on his face.
You looked at Bellamy who only stepped away from the driver’s side giving you the opportunity to sit in front. You glanced at Roan and Echo who was watching the scene unfold, when there was no objection on Roan’s face you complied.
You slid passed the steering wheel to the middle of the seat, Bellamy the driver and Miller sat against the window, back slightly turned so he could see the back of the rover, tightly clutching his gun. “Som ste skechi (Something is wrong).” Echo whispered softly.
“Hey! None of that.” Miller said, everyone was tense.
“Bellamy.” You turn to him, watching him carefully.
“We need to be extra careful.”
“Of what? We came willingly and it’s not like we brought an army for fighting.” “You can talk to Clarke.” Miller said breaking off the conversation. Bellamy clenched his jaw.
The ride was uncomfortable, to say the least, the last thing on your mind was that you were sick of sitting on your sore behind with your sore back. What was worse was Bellamy’s white-knuckled grip on the steering wheel and Miller who kept his finger on the safety. You couldn’t turn your head to look to the back, scared of setting Miller off like the ticking time bomb he was.
The hours seemed to drag as you made your way to the camp but that too came to an end even if it felt like an eternity. Finally able to stretch your legs, your feet splashed in the mud puddle, it had been raining and hard if the ground was any indication.
“They’ll show you all to your quarters, Clarke is expecting you in the meeting room in 30 min, weapons stay here.”
“You can’t do that.” You stated.
“Yes I can.” Bellamy said defiantly.
“Look around Bellamy, everyone here hates Azgeda, you can’t promise me you can stop them from doing anything rash.” Bellamy hesitated at your words, glancing around at the people who had stopped work to glare.
“It’s final.” Bellamy said anyway. You took off your sword and slid the knife out your boot and stuffed them in the guard's arms none too politely. “You have your old room.” You didn’t wait up as you stomped off, determined to find Marcus.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
“He's not there, you know.” Miller says coming to stand a few feet away from where you had been knocking on the door, it was almost time for the meeting.
“Where is he?” Miller didn’t answer, his cold and distant nature abundantly clear.
“I know we didn’t get along but this is a new low, even Murphy would see that.” You ignored the outright blow
“You will tell me what the hell is going on, right now, Miller.” Again Miller doesn’t answer.
“Abby wants to see you.” Bellamy says from where he appeared, your head snaps in his direction.
“The meeting is about to start.” You wait for an answer, “this is a mistake, Bellamy.” You say, Miller lunges for you, you throw a punch to his face that makes him stumble as Bellamy tries to grab you. You slam Bellamy into the wall hard with your shoulder as Miller grabs your arm, you struggle to break his grip as he twists your arm behind your back so far that you are on your knees to try and alleviate the pain in your shoulder. You sweep his feet out from under him in a painful move that shoots into your shoulder, Miller lets go of your arm as he hits the ground. Bellamy wraps his arms around you perfectly immobilising you and avoiding your kicks to his groin by twisting his hips. “Help!” You finally yell but as soon as the words are out your mouth, Bellamy slams you into the wall and clamps a hand to your mouth, your head slams into the metal as his fingers dig into your skin to keep your mouth shut. You don’t have the capacity to make a sound as you vision blotches and your head lulls. You are still trying to get your brain to work right as you struggle weakly but they are quickly dragging you down the hall. You had a really bad feeling about this.
Next Chapter
Tag List:
@sunshine-and-riverwater @jinx-is-fire @silver424@cherrysfandom @thebookandmoviefangirl @that-cute-stranger @waitingtobeimpressed
Blood Colors - Chapter 15
-Masterlist
Pairing: Roan x Reader
Warnings: None
Previous Chapter
Chapter 1
***Super Long Chapter Warning***
“What happened?” Roan was there when you burst into the front doors, of course, Roan would have had reports from Guards as soon as you were in the line of sight of the Palace.
“Lay him down, we don’t have time to wait for the healers,” you ordered to whom the guards quickly obeyed as Cedree quickly explained. He was already dead, blue and pale.
“(Y/n)?” The King asked, you only shook your head. Nymph didn’t respond, still in a state of shock.
“Are you alright?” Roan asked her, she only nodded.
“Let's go, my Lady,” You said softly, recognizing that look in her eye a little.
“You two, come see me after you’ve cleaned up,” Roan said.
The walk to her rooms was silent and slow but soon you reached it, Cedree had come along. He opened the door for the two of you. “We will give you some time.” You said curtly but before you and Cedree could leave, she stopped you.
“(Y/n), stay a moment,” You nodded to Cedree who was clearly offering to stay. “I don’t know who you think you are but I must warn you that the King will be choosing me in five days and when he does, there will be less place for you here,” She said it so casually when you were finally alone as if she was only noting the weather. You were a little stunned. You opened your mouth to say something and decided against it. “I didn’t dismiss you,” Was her last thing she said to you but you weren’t going to stop on account of her. You had so many bigger fish to fry
You walked to your rooms quickly and washed your face, also changing your clothes, everything was spattered in blood. When you had finally finished you walked to Roan’s quarters, you were bristling by now but tried your best to suppress it down when the guards opened the doors.
"Are you okay?” Roan asked when you entered stepping closer. You paused wanting to tell him everything at the forefront of your mind. You nodded, Roan gave you a disapproving look but before he could say anything, Cedree cleared his throat. “I shouldn’t have taken them, I knew it was dangerous.” You start
“You warned them,” Cedree piped in.
“I will make this right with Lady Nymph, and we need to somehow remedy the cause,” Roan said. “And then there’s the matter of Izobel.”
“Do you still insist on these... lighthearted matters when there is so much unrest around us?” You questioned.
“I have to,” You tried your best to hide your severe disappointment.
“What are we going to do about Aleksondria, everything she does has no signs of her involvement?”
“We need to wait until the slip-up,” Roan answered and you gave an exasperated sigh. “Thank you for your service today, Cedree. I would ask that you further lookout for (Y/n).” For the first time in your life, you didn’t object, even when Roan asked so openly, to your embarrassment. But you knew what was lying ahead, Nire would be here tomorrow. Cedree left then.
“We need to talk about the scars on your back,” Roan said. You hated that it had come to this, you wanted it to be so much different, you wanted to know yourself. “It means you are to be an Azgedan Queen.” You were completely stunned.
“I don’t understand, how would-“ you paused, too many questions at once “why would-“
“Nire has predicted this in your future which unless you believe in some unknown higher power, it means he intends to use you to get the things that he wants,” Roan explained. “(Y/n) if anyone knew then it would mean this all becomes true,” Roan emphasised.
“But Izobel already knew and we don’t know who-“ you hate how anxious your voice sound.
“That's in the past now, but no one else can know. We need to hope she told no one.”
“What would it mean?”
“It would destabilise my reign,” Roan was plain and simple in his explanation. “Get some rest, tomorrow will be a big day,” Roan bid you.
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You wake up and its pitch black, the moon shines through the window to give the only very limited elimination to the room. There’s a movement, a small shuffle and you immediately tense but as you din yourself wanting to draw the knife from under your pillow you find yourself unable to move.
The panic sets in then. Laboured breathing and you can’t even scream for a guard even though you try.
The bed dips but all you can do is lie there, a hand guides you to roll onto your back. A scrapping feeling slides itself into your gut as you beheld the intruder’s face.
Nire places his hand on the inside of your thigh as it slides up ever so slowly. You can’t move, you can’t cry out but inside you are trying to fight so hard, paralysed you stare up at him in horror as his hand reaches-
You scream yourself awake. Eyes full of tears, you quickly sit up to scope the room. You move back against the headrest as if Nire would be hiding somewhere, and wrap your arms around your knees. There’s a knock at the door which startles you/
“Yu laik ait, Jus Gona (Are you alright)?” You relax when it’s just the guard.
“Sha. (Yes)” You say but you must have said it too softly.
“Jus Gona?” He asks again.
“Sha.” You say, this time raising your voice. When there’s no other question you determine that he heard this time.
You can’t go back to sleep now, the fear of lying down completely overtakes your thoughts and actions, so you sit upright, even though it’s pitch dark and dawn is far off.
The first hour of staying awake came easily enough but as time went by, it weighs on you like carrying a bucket of water around. Eyes burning from soreness, you try to shake yourself awake. In the moment between the waking world and sleep, your thoughts mingle into a non-sensical, non-linear thought and just as you fade into the darkness, a hand grabs your neck.
You sit up again and to shake the feeling off, it felt so real, even though it’s just imaginative, you wrap your hand around the same spot. Your fingers are warm and familiar, not like Nire’s which is harsh and thick, you shudder violently. Harassed by your thoughts and dreams you feel awake enough to stay awake.
When you finally do fall asleep, birds have been chirping outside, the light easing through the window, in the light you feel safe to dose off. It doesn’t take long before you are rudely awakened by the closing of the door and still on edge you sit bolt upright. Sighing you get up, on the table laid out is your armour again, Nire must be here, you swallow the bile rising in your throat.
When you step outside your rooms, you spot Roan walking towards your quarters, clearly coming to fetch you, Cedree beside him, also dressed up for the glum occasion. “You look like you were the sheep being counted all night.” Cedree commented, his accent always present as he rolls his ‘r’s deep.
“Thanks, I feel beautiful too.” Your words drip with sarcasm.
“Right, let’s get this done with.” Roan declares and you're glad to oblige, the sooner this passes the sooner you can relax your erratic heart rate.
The throne room is packed with people as you stand on the dais beside Cedree, a new unknown.
“Would you standstill.” He whispers as Roan talks to a few of his men for a moment. It's only at the comment that you notice you are indeed frantically fidgeting, so you fold your hands to keep them occupied.
The King sits on his throne, and you can feel Cedree shuffle closer, his shoulder coming to brush up against your own.
“Today we welcome back, the greatest surprise of the past few weeks,” Though Roan’s words were positive his features and his tone had never been so grave. “Please Welcome, Lord Nire.” The doors swing open in a disgustingly dramatic entrance. Everyone’s clapping dissolves, upon seeing his face your body screams run to you and you have half the mind to do so, but Cedree bumps his shoulder against yours and it grounds you once more. Nire’s stark eyes catch yours and the smirk on his face remains, maybe even widening. You feel your face flush and your stomach turn. His head is shaved and you can see up until where the trauma you inflicted stretches with evidence of some form of stitching that was present, the wound is still pink but it has closed. You remember the sound and the feel. You quickly rush out of the room.
You make outside, the closest place and there you wretch up the contents from whenever last you had eaten, you couldn’t even remember.
"Pregnant?" Cedree asks firstly, you give him a weird look.
"No." You deny harshly.
"Just asking." He raises his hands in surrender. Cedree is contempt to simply stand beside you as you take a few deep breaths when you feel exceedingly ill.
“Faya Gona,” The voice rolls of you like you’ve been flung with the most horrible feeling you could ever experience, your neck hairs stand on end as you and Cedree both turn to face the owner of the voice. “That is what they call you now, isn’t it?” His grin widens as he comes to stand only meters away. “You look pale,” He comments, his face forming into a worried frown and you can’t help but pull a disgusted face.
“Right, that’s enough, maybe you should take yourself elsewhere,” Cedree says stepping in.
“Or what?” Nire challenges, there’s a long pause. “Fine, but I will say this. I hear the king is looking for a queen, I look forward to seeing you celebrating the same fate soon.” He leaves then, Cedree’s head snaps yo you.
“What does he mean?”
“Nothing good.” You answer.
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She was quiet, too quiet and if you stare too long at her, she got anxious and started fidgeting with anything she could get her hands on. Roan had chosen the gardens to have a small luncheon with his newest date, of course, fall had started and the garden already had less colour. Roan asked her a question, you weren’t particularly listening to the question as you observed her. She was pretty, but to think that this could be Azgeda’s queen, hell you could do a better job. Reluctant to answer her eyes fretted up to you, Roan shot you a look and you turned away with a sigh. Spoilsport, you liked making the girl squirm, you knew Roan wouldn’t pick her anyway. The two were feasting on some of the most delicious fruits you had seen in your life, and you had missed your lunch, needless to say, you were very hungry. The girl barely ate, and when she did she chewed as if she was afraid for someone to notice. It seemed as if she was only able to answer questions, she’d barely ever started a conversation, so when Roan let the conversation die it was filled with long silences as he tried to give her chance to lead but she never came up. Eventually, she asked to be dismissed.
“That was the hardest half hour of my life,” You plucked up a plum from the table.
“I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t watch the girl like you plan to kill her in her sleep,”
“You’re not going to choose her anyway,” You shrugged as you bit into the plum, juice running down your chin, you were momentarily stunned into silence at the taste.
“Maybe I should, I’d certainly have a lot more quiet time, You glared at him.
“Is that some sort of comment about me?” You questioned.
“I mean I didn’t compare you to her,” He pointed out, you’re cheeks burned slightly.
“She will be devoured by her people, you’ll be a widower within a year,” Roan didn’t answer but you could see he saw the truth in that.
“May I be dismissed?” You questioned feigning the girl’s meek manner earlier.
“No,” Roan stands from the table, “My sister Elodi is arriving soon, her governess is sick and will need to rest when she arrives. I have sent for other governess but they might only arrive within a fortnight. With Nire and Aleksondria here, I don’t want to trust her with anyone else.”
“Chaperone, Baby sitter, clearly I am expanding my job description,” Roan roles his eyes. “It’s fine, I’ll do it but kids really don’t like me.”
“I’ll introduce you too, again, I’m sure she has forgotten you.”
Roan walks with you to the stables, you don’t wait long before a horse trots up to the courtyard, the woman on it looks pale but the girl in her lap seems quite the opposite. She squeals when she sees her brother. And all that Roan can do is catch her as she almost flings herself off the horse into Roan’s arms, Roan laughs though the governess scolds the child for her reckless behaviour. You stand back observing the precious moment, Elodi has grown since you last saw her. She’s gotten taller and her wavy brown hair reaches her waist. “I’ve missed you,” Roan says when he puts her down on the ground bending to her height to talk to her. “Galia, you may go to your rooms and rest,” Roan said to the woman who had dismounted.
“Mochof, Haihefa Roan (Thank you, King Roan).” She says before she disappears. Roan picks up his little sister and walks closer to you.
“Elodi, dison laik (y/n), ai lukot (Elodi, this is (y/n), my friend),” Roan introduces
“Meika's slak (Nice to meet you).”
“Heya (Hello).” She says very quietly, there’s a smile on her face but you can see she’s shy.
“Em na gifa in kom yu kom taim Gaya ge fis op (She will take care of you until Gaya is better),” Elodi glances at you then back at Roan, clearly upset.
“Chomouda ai nou na set ruan gon yu (Why can’t I stay with you)?” She questions.
“Elodi, Ai laik Haihefa, ai laik honsen (Elodi, I am King, I am busy),” She looked dejected as Roan paused. “Ai na choj op gon yu nat (Elodi, I am King, I am busy. I will eat with you tonight),” He added, she only nodded a little solemn.
Roan places her on the ground and you outstretch your hand to her, she hesitates but decides to take it.
“Weron emo osir gon (Where are we going)?” She asks when you lead her away.
“We need to find my friend and scare him,” You smile down at her, she smiles a little.
“Skai drag em (Goddamit)!” Cedree exclaims as Elodi lets out a laugh. “Of course your up to no good. And influencing the poor young one's mind. Who is this by the way?” Cedree questions, going down onto his haunches.
“Elodi,” She says softly.
“King Roan’s sister,” You add, as he shakes her hand softly.
“Babysitting are we?” Cedree questions when he straightens.
“Better than whatever the hell you’re doing.”
“Looking handsome? I would say it is a fine job that I seem to excel at,” He jokes, you roll your eyes.
“Right. Save me a seat at dinner,” You ask, he nods as you leave with Elodi.
You take Elodi to her room where all her belongings are kept, ready for her return. She decides to play with one of her toys so you simply sit and watch her. You know the type, the shy reserved child, eager to entertain themselves. Worryingly you notice a few times that Elodi has a cough.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
Cedree has saved you a seat as promised, you collapse onto the bench next to him after taking Elodi to dinner with Roan who had kindly invited you to join them but you declined, seeing as Elodi would be grateful for the time spent alone with her brother.
“Babysitting duties done for the day?”
“Children require twenty four hour care, they don’t become adults when the full moon’s rise like some twisted werewolf curse.” You state.
You had barely finished eating your food when I guard stood at attention by your table. “Haihefa don konge Jus Gona (The King has summoned the Blood Warrior),” He states then leaves.
“Babysitting continuous,” Cedree stated as you stood.
When you reached Roan’s rooms he was pacing, you first noted Elodi asleep on the bed, considerably paler then she was when you left her.
“I’m sorry to ask this of you but will you tend to her? I know this is a lot ask but I have business to attend to.”
“I won’t pretend I’m a doctor or healer like Abby but I can at least try.” You answer.
“Thank you, I owe you.”
“And I’ll be sure to collect.” You said, you picked up Elodi from the bed, she only stirred but didn’t wake. You could feel her fever ignited skin against you. “I’ll see you tomorrow after breakfast.”
“(Y/n) you don’t have to-“
“Cedree can watch Elodi for the hour if that long. And you need my opinion, how else will you navigate this sea of women.” You didn’t leave room for argument as you left.
Never in your life had you ever tended to a sick child but here you were. It was harder than expected, though equally tired, you tried to get her fever to break with a moist cloth, she was coughing but there was nothing you could do but give her tea mixed with honey and lemon to help soothe her throat. Elodi although awake, was in a sour mood undoubtedly she felt worse than she looked. Finally, by early morning she showed sign of tiring so you swayed her in her arms, her head pressed into your shoulder. Her fever seemed like it was breaking finally. You were almost whisking yourself to sleep with swaying.
There was a quiet knock at the door that caught your attention and luckily not Elodi’s as she dosed peacefully. You lay her down in your bed. “I came to see how she was doing?” Roan asked, whispering softly. “Better, I think the worst has passed but she might not be feeling well for a while.”
“That’s good, thank you again, (y/n). Well, I’ll leave you to get some rest.” Roan left again, you nodded.
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You kept your distance well when Roan had taken his next date through a stroll in the woods. Tayla was her name, unlike her previous two competitors, she was not of noble birth but raised her status by becoming a warrior. And she was beautiful too, maybe a little serious but no less expected from someone who has spent her life, fighting others. She seemed respectful and proper and truly you could see the next Queen in her. Which is why you felt guilty when your stomach twisted into a hot flare of anger when she touched him. Tayla had one quirk that ceased to annoy you but Roan didn’t seem to notice, she was too touchy. But she was a good leader and well-liked which is why it made all the harder not think the thought you were currently going through right now. But you kept your emotions in checked and simply observed.
Tayla and Roan clicked well, she was well versed in how to have a decent conversation and she was pleasant to be around.
Soon enough it came to an end, and when you reached the Palace again Elodi and Cedree came to meet you in the courtyard. You took Elodi back to your rooms after hearing Cedree had brought her down for breakfast. At least she was eating.
When the doors to your room swung open, however, you stared at the chaos, papers were strewn across the floor in front of your desk where it seemed as if every drawer had been turned out onto the table. The person didn’t even seem to hide it. They wanted you to know they had taken something, after putting Elodi down to allow her to rest you rummaged through the mess to try and see if what you suspected was taken and after a brief panic you hands brushed over something cold. Your bother’s necklace was still here thankfully, you clutched it tightly for a moment to allow your anxiety to dissipate. When it did, you were left clueless as to what had been taken, so you shuffled through the papers in an attempt to reorganise while still trying to account for the lost item. At last, you gave up and went to have a little nap to soothe your own tiredness.
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It’s quite late when you are in the bath, simply trying to relax, you had woken Elodi up to eat and bathe herself before she had asked to go to bed again no doubt she would be up early tomorrow. The doors to your room swing open to reveal Roan and Cedree, both men pause when noticing you, luckily the bathtub is milky with soap, still, you curl up a little. “Cedree take Elodi to her rooms, I have sent for someone to look after her for tonight,” Roan said, Cedree immediately springing to action.
“Why?” You question after Cedree has left and the doors behind him close, Roan stands, pacing. “What happened?” Something tells you that something isn’t right. Roan digs something out of his pocket as he steps a little closer to the tub, avoiding your gaze.
“Nire produced this in the council meeting today,” Roan said as he holds the page out for you to see. You reach out but you don’t grab it as your hands are wet, though you instantly recognise it. It was the page you drew the scars on your back on
“That’s what they took,” You mumble more to yourself.
“What?” Roan questions, alarmed.
“Roan will you please just turn around so I can get out?” He does so even though you can see his impatient to hear what you have to say.
Hesitantly you rise, as if testing whether he would turn back around, but he doesn’t, you step out and wrap your self in a patchwork towel.
“Someone had gotten into my room when we were out with Tayla today when I came back my desk was in chaos but I couldn’t figure out what was taken.” You say, Roan turning around at the sound of your voice, seemingly relieved that he can look you in the eyes again. “What did the council say?”
“I was dismissed, they must first think of what is to be gained from my options. No doubt Nire and Aleksondria are poisoning the minds of the council.”
“I thought you could choose who you want to wed? And how did Nire get into the meeting?” You question.
“Yes I could choose from the options given to me but if they insist your carved fate to be true, then there will be no choice,” Roan explained, “As for Nire, he had produced another paper to say he would be representing one of the council members who is said to be ill.”
“Slythering slimy snake, I should have sliced his throat open when I had the chance,” You fume, then a thought struck you. “What does it mean if they don’t accept it?”
“It means you will be seen as an imposter and a threat to the throne,” Roan folded his arms.
“Meaning I will be executed,” You supply when Roan seemed unwilling to.
“Which would lead to all-out war not only against Skaikru but every clan in the coalition,” Roan reminded.
“You would lose your crown.”
“And my head with it,” Roan pointed out.
“So what our only options is to hope that we are allowed to get hitched or we both die?” You ask, Roan only nods. “If they choose that we marry, which is highly unlikely, what do they stand to gain by it?”
“Manipulation, the favour of the people,” Roan supplied.
“How would it inspire favour, when most believe me a murderer?” You ask, Roan doesn’t answer, you see the hesitation even though he knows the answer. “Roan?”
“If they were to remove you from rule after, people would feel joined again, like their voices are heard.”
“You mean killed?” Roan sighs. That was it, either you die or you die, there was no other way.
“How do we continue?” You ask finally.
“As normal. After breakfast I will be meeting with the second final contender, I have arranged to have someone else take care of Elodi for the time being, I knew you might want some time to think,” Roan said, you nodded. “We’ll talk in the morning,” Roan was about to leave when he paused. “It seems all I can give you is grave news in Azgeda, I’m sorry.” You still had no words as he left.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
It went down exactly as Roan said, you met Roan in the foyer the next morning after breakfast. “Anything?” You asked, Roan’s face looked grim.
“Nothing,” As the two of you walked outside into the courtyard.
“How can you just continue after you’ve heard this?” You question, trying to stay quiet, you were rudely interrupted when you Roan came to a sudden halt. You looked at who he was staring at. Nire bowed before the King, the grin on his face was clear that he was mocking Roan.
“Haihefa,” Roan took a few angry steps forward he didn’t need provocation to grip Nire by the lapels.
“You. I know what you did and what you are doing and you will pay for it in the dearest way possible,” Roan grit out, guards rushed up but Roan waved them off. Nire was cool and calm in his reaction as he glanced over at you with a cold look.
“Threaten me again, and much worse will ensue,” Nire said quietly, but you could hear it. You followed Roan as he rudely brushed past Nire.
“Roan, you can’t just-“
“My hands might be tied in some cases but no one, and I mean no one questions it, I am king,” Roan said turning on you, a little taken aback by the fierceness of his outburst.
“Fine, I didn’t mean-“
“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to turn on you,” Roan apologised softly as he came to a standstill with you beside him.
“It’s fine, we all know why we are so on edge,” You dismissed. Roan put on his best smile as his date appeared. “Olena,” He took her hand as she came to stand before him and kissed it. She didn’t react, only looked over at you. “This is (y/n), known as the Jus Gona, she will be accompanying us for our own safety.”
She managed a slight reaction as she regarded you for a while longer, “Is the rumours true have you also earned the title, Faya Gona?” She questioned.
“Though I’m not proud to admit it, yes I did,” You say curtly not in the mood to discuss your past failings when your certain doom was not far.
“Did you not kill rioters and revolutionaries?”
“I did but lives are lives, even when they are not exactly our friends,” You answered with a tight-lipped smile awaiting the backlash or insult but it never came, she nodded.
“What is our plans?” She asked Roan.
“I thought a game of chest might do,” Roan informed.
“Very well.”
You followed the two to the entertainment room and although there were guards outside you hung in a corner of a room. Barely listening.
“What do you say Jus Gona?” It was Olena that interrupted your thoughts after they had packed out the chess pieces. You looked to Roan for help but he gave you none.
“I’m sorry I was not listening,” You could see she was a little surprised.
“There must be serious unrest, I heard what had happened to Nymph.”
“Yes, unfortunately, we had felt the anger of the people through one casualty, there would have been more if Cedree and I hadn’t been there.”
“Oh I have no doubt and you think by marrying this might be remedied?” She turned to Roan.
“I believe what the people seek is security, to know that there King still has Azgeda and only Azgeda in mind, if I make the right choice and follow traditions it might ease some of the unrest,” Roan explained. That was another thing, if they decided that you would marry Roan, you would be stirring up more trouble, alienating him to his people. Why was there so much at stake?
There was a knock at the door momentarily interrupting the conversation until you stepped up and slightly opened the door. “What?” You asked Cedree, maybe a little harsher than he deserved.
“Letter for you.”
“Cedree why the hell do you tell me about a letter when I am currently busy, there are more important things,” You scolded him, trying to keep your voice down as possible.
“It's from your people,” He said softly as if he knew how important that would be. “It’s fine, I’ll tend here, you go,” He said before you think of words to form, you nodded.
“Haihefa, Olena, I have some urgent business to attend to but Cedree will be here in my stead,” You bid them. Roan simply nodded though you could see he was curious about what exactly you were off to do.
In your rooms, you find the letter on the desk and hastily tore it open.
Polis is in complete unrest, we fear for the safety of Skaikru in Polis but also fear that the alliance keeping the plans together might soon be failing.
If the circumstances were different I’d ask you to return, we could use your help but as it’s not, I just want you to be safe.
Marcus
The first person you thought to was Clarke, but then your worry dissipated, not only did she have Bellamy but also Lexa, even if one would be injured or worse, the other would protect Clarke with their life. You still wanted nothing more than to be there and especially with everything that was happening, you felt like you it would be the best option. It took everything in you to stop yourself from walking out those doors and out the palace and never come back but your first thought was that you would probably never see Roan again. It affected you more than you thought possible. So you sat down at your desk and began writing back. Not necessarily a reply but maybe something you would instruct Cedree to send should anything happen to you.
When Roan finds you later, the sun was starting to set and you sat with a massive headache because of staring at the letters too long. You were almost done, but your letter to Marcus might need to be rewritten since the words began to swim as you were writing the last few sentences. “What happened now?” He asked, clearly not ready for bad news but who would be? This must be placing a lot of stress on his shoulders.
“It was Marcus, he says there is a lot of unrest in Polis.”
“I also heard, what else did he want?” Roan asked, he always knew that there was something more.
You hesitated, “He wanted me to come to their aid.” You said at last.
“And you want to.” He added, certain.
“Roan, please. I know it’s not possible.”
“Yes but knowing what can’t be done and what one wants to do, doesn’t have to match, (y/n) you are only human.” Roan offered kindly, you sighed.
“How did it go? The date.” You inquired for a change of topic, Roan came to lean up against the desk.
“Fine, any idea who I should choose?” He asked.
“Nymph you’d known for a while, I guess you can easier judge her character. It’s a no on the shy girl, whatever her name is. Olena is very serious but sensible and to the point, she seems like she could be valuable in making a decision.”
“And Tayla?”
“Tayla seems like a good warrior, a good symbol for Azgeda,” You stated even though you were trying to avoid the enquiry.
“But?” Roan questioned, eyebrows raised.
“But she’s too pretty, too perfect,” You said.
“Those don’t seem like bad qualities,” Roan pointed out.
“No, I guess not,” You didn’t want to continue for fear of it looking suspicious, “There is also one more,” Roan shook his head. “Not?”
“No, Danik sends her regards, her mother died and she is in mourning,” Roan said.
“So she’s not an option?” He shook his head. “Do you still have to make a decision?” Roan nodded.
“It will be tomorrow night, then there will be an engagement feast after.”
“So many choices so little time,” You shrugged.
“Or it could be that this is all ripped from my hands. So I have one last question for you, how do you think (y/n) would fair?” He questioned.
“Don’t joke,” You scolded as you stood and drew the curtains on your windows.
“I’m serious,” He said even though he didn’t look it.
“Reckless, foolish, too young, impulsive, a bad example and not of Azgeda,” Roan gave you an incredulous look.
“Do you seriously think so little of yourself?” He asked, his words kind and gentle but you weren’t going to beat around the bush.
“Roan this isn’t just marriage, this is so much more, I’ve not been raised for this. I was meant to die as a nobody on a ship for something I did wrong.”
“So why are you here?” Roan questioned. “I believe it’s much more than a coincidence,” You don’t say anything even though you don’t agree.
“What’s this?” Roan asks plucking up the letter you wrote to Marcus Kane.
“Roan don’t-“ You jumped up suddenly to grab the letter from him, but he evades you quickly.
“Why did you write this?” You finally snatch it out of his hand and the other one, stowing it away in a drawer.
“You know why.” You give him a look.
“Really have you already decided your fate?” He questions.
“No but I’m not exactly the optimist here and it’s just in case I don’t get a chance to say goodbye.” You say, Roan nods, accepting your answer.
“Anyway, I need to check up on Elodi.” Roan says before he turns to leave. “(Y/n).” He turns around to you as you listen intently. “Say I can’t protect you but someone else might be able to, would you do it?”
“Do what, Roan? What could possibly offer me that kind of protection?"
“Marriage. If you are married then you can’t be seen as a threat to the throne.”
“Married? Roan to who?” You question a little shocked at his suggestion.
“Someone you choose, you don’t have to choose now, but I won’t marry you off to someone whom you don’t know.” Roan states.
“Roan this is… crazy-“
“Think about it, if anything.” He says before he leaves.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
Its absolute chaos when you step outside your room. Cedree is there to give you the news that caused all this. “Lexa kom Trikru steduan (Lexa of the Tree clan is dead,” You are a little stunned by it as the two of you make it down for breakfast. “Did you know her?” He asks when you look a little devastated.
“I guess so. Didn’t think it would- Shit Clarke.” You panic a little.
“Who’s Clarke? Someone you knew?” Cedree ask as he watches you, you take a quick turn down a different hall and it’s as if Cedree knows exactly whats happening. Cedree grabs your hand and pulls you into a little a clove in the wall.
“Listen, you can’t do that. I know what you’re thinking, believe me, I know.” Cedree says as he presses your shoulders into the wall, your worry is quickly replaced by anger.
“Cedree I swear to fucking God-“ You struggle against your grip but he effectively keeps you pinned against the wall.
“Keep quiet.” He shushes you as people pass. “This is not a decision you want to make lightly, what about Roan? You would forever be hunted? Where would you go looking like Azgeda?” All the questions were starting to make sense and you stopped struggling but it didn’t mean your anger had disappeared. When Cedree was convinced you wouldn’t bolt to the stables when he let go, you shrugged off his hands and felt like kicking something with your frustration.
“I need to go talk to Roan.” You say but Cedree stops you again, he wraps an arm around your shoulders.
“I’m sure with the news, Roan is very busy, maybe let’s have breakfast first.” He guides you towards the dining hall and you oblige even though you felt upset, even more so when you knew it was true.
You couldn’t eat with the news, you wanted to know what it meant, you wanted to know if Clarke was okay, you didn’t want to sit here and listen to everyone gossip about what might be coming.
“You not gonna eat?” Cedree asks, you shake your head. So Cedree picks up your plate and scrapes the food onto his empty plate. “What? A mans gotta eat.” He says when you stare at him.
So you gave it some time until lunch came and gone and decided that surely Roan must have been finished by now. You made your way to Roan’s quarters, the first place you’d look for him but what you found instead was Echo waiting outside for him.
“The King is busy,” Was the first thing she declared.
“You came back, when did you arrive?” You ask a little confused.
“In the morning, the King can’t see anyone now,” She said again, always friendly, you thought.
“Echo, it’s urgent.”
“Not as urgent as what he’s attending to now, so move along, I’ll tell him you were here,” Echo said.
“Seeing as you weren’t getting through to her you turned around to leave.”
“(Y/n), he will probably want to see you later in the afternoon, before the announcement,” Echo informed, you nodded, thankful for the bit of information.
You slumped next to Cedree, where he sat watching the guards and soldiers spar, he was eating, again, of course.
“What now?”
“Roan’s still busy.”
“Aye, he is and he will be until he’s not, nothing you can do about that, sweetheart,” Cedree informed.
“Cedree where the hell are you from?” You question.
“It's a long story but I guess you have time.” He says rubbing your frustration in a little. “These aren’t the only people who survived prime faya. Many others on lands far away. Although there it's very different from here, we didn’t have anything to bind a band of people together, it has always been each man for himself.”
“More savage?”
“Say what you will about all the other clans, but Azgeda has formed its own society though war and fighting at it’s principle, there are the gentler folk, and the people who choose not and could not participate in what everyone thinks all Azgedans do,” Cedree explained, you saw his point. Azgeda was complicated more than Trikru, you had indeed noticed.
“That’s not my question.”
“You shush and listen to my story.” He chides playfully, trying to sound dramatic. “Well there’s lots of killing there, and we speak the same as you do still maybe the slang is different and the accents and you sometimes here a language that has not been heard in a while. I’m from what people use to call Ireland.”
“Why did you come here?”
Cedree’s look turned a little more solemn, “I was never meant to stay in one place and it became all the clearer when I lost my family. Only what they don’t tell you is that when you join Azgeda there is no leaving this place.”
“Would you leave if you could?”
“I’ve been here for so long I don’t think I would leave even if I could. I mean sure everyone leaves people behind but Azgeda changes a person and I wasn’t sure that those people would want what I brought anymore.” Cedree explains.
“It’s why you knew this morning?”
“You and I are much more alike than you may think.” Cedree remarks, it was clear to you as well. “Well I’d hate to leave you while you wait by yourself but I need to prepare for tonight. You should do the same, I’ll save you a seat (y/n).”
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
After doing and re-doing your braids, you finally brushed your hair through once more before you decided you were done, you were far too early for the whole idea but you couldn’t sit still. The knock at your door drew you away from the mirror as Echo stepped inside.
“Now?” She simply nodded and you al but rushed past her.
Roan was getting ready when you found him in his rooms, his armour being strapped on by an assistant, he dismissed the servant and you stepped closer to help him, fasten the straps.
“I’m sorry, I couldn’t see you earlier, the news of Lexa caused utter chaos.”
“But the announcement is still on? No news from the Council?” You questioned, Roan shook his head.
“For now, at least, everything continues. You’ll be glad to hear that I received new that Wanheda is alive and well.” Roan said as you were stunned into silence, finally relieved.
“Can this news change anything?”
“It could, the fact that the coalition has shattered can work either in our favour or against us. It means my people will be looking for me to act and if I do it could strengthen my position with them.”
“Would it be against Skaikru?” You ask.
“Clarke is as much my friend as she is yours.” He answers.
“But this also means that if I die that I don’t become a martyr to my people or under Lexa’s rule.”
“You mean Skaikru.” Roan raises a brow.
“Yes, I mean Skaikru.” You correct quickly.
“(Y/n) you can’t make these slips around others, if you are to be safe here, you need to be careful that you don’t look to be a sympathiser.”
“I thought Skaikru wasn’t our enemy?” You question, confused.
“Not in everyone’s eyes.” Roan reminded. “But yes this could mean that there is less meaning if you die, which would give them less cause to try and kill you.”
“Could they simply dismiss it?”
“They could,” Roan said.
“So you’re getting married.” You stated, you couldn’t help but feel something at the thought, not anything good.
“I have to be engaged first.” Roan shrugged but it meant nothing to you.
“I thought about it,” You say, Roan looked confused for a moment, “And I thought about it and I thought about it and then I thought about it some more. If it can’t be helped, if it is my last option, I will marry Cedree but only if you trust him.”
“I’m sure, Cedree would be delighted at your intention to make him your last resort.” Roan joked.
“Roan this is serious. Would he even-?”
“You would be making a good choice and Cedree would accept, he likes you.”
“I’ve known him less than a week and I plan on marrying him.” You state.
“Welcome to the club.”
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
It was done, the announcement was made. Roan had chosen Tyla and you couldn’t deny it, it hurt to look at them. Echo glanced at you as you sat at the table, Cedree on your other side with a few other warriors littered around. All you could do was stare at the Tyla’s glee as she stood beside him on the dais. “Oooh must hurt.” Echo was never really one to keep her mouth shut.
“Shut up,” You say taking a big swallow of the sour alcohol that Azgeda claimed to be experts in.
“What?” Cedree always curious quickly chimed in.
“Let's just say there might be an extra reason why the Tyla and buttercup over here wouldn’t get along, at least not after tonight,” Echo said a smile on her face.
“Less talking, more drinking,” You say sliding both Cedree and Echo’s cups closer to them.
“Now that is something I can get behind,” Cedree declared before finishing his cup.
The food was good but by the amount that everyone at the table was drinking, no one would actually be able to taste the food. It was so easy to get shamelessly drunk when that was what everyone did, even though it might not be for the same reason. You had avoided looking at the King and the queen-to-be the whole evening but now when the was no coherent conversation between anyone, did you glance up. Roan’s eyes met yours as if he knew you was looking but before he could hold your gaze a moment longer, Nymph drew his attention back. It was almost painful to watch, you stood up suddenly not really in control of your own actions as you walked out of the hall into the open courtyard. A steady snow had started to drift down, a reminder that summer didn’t ever last.
You’re not outside alone for long before you almost jump out of your skin when a cloak is wrapped around your shoulders. “What the hell?” You snap turning to face Cedree.
“Sorry, it’s a habit to keep quiet,” He shrugged.
“I don’t need it anyway,” You say a little stubbornly.
“Of course you do, it’s too cold out here for Skaikru,”
“Speak for yourself,” You shot back though a playful grin now etching itself on your face.
“What are you doing out here anyway?”
“I’m too sober for how drunk everyone else in there is,” You comment watching the guards pace the walls of the fortress.
“I get that,” Cedree was content to keep quiet after that, standing next to you and watching the guards too. You glanced at him, and suddenly all the hurt poured into your chest. You were going to move on in any way you could, the only way you knew how to, you had to marry this guy anyway.
You turned to Cedree and quickly cupped his cheeks, his soft beard rustling through your fingers, he didn’t react only watched you as you inched up slowly onto your toes and captured his lips between yours. He immediately returned the kiss, spinning you around until the wall hit your back. “Not to be a spoilsport,” Cedree said in between kisses, “But I have my boundaries, I don’t do drunken mistakes.”
“Do I look drunk to you?”
“Well no, I would say you could use a couple more drinks before you reach that point.” You kissed him again, and he chased after your lips but broke the kiss anyway. Movement caught your eye, and there pausing as he talked to a guard, was Roan, he saw. Sudden shame-filled you until Cedree drew you back again, you were going to marry him anyway, you reminded yourself again.
“Well Echo said-“
“Cedree, this is my offer take it or leave it.” You interrupted him, a little anger flared up within you.
Cedree stepped closer and this time cupped your cheeks. The cool air made your breaths visible as they collided, “I’ve been wanting to do this for a long time,” He whispered before his lips could reach yours you placed your hands gently on his shoulders.
“Somewhere a little more private, please?” You asked sweetly.
Next Chapter
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I Ship You With...
hi may i please request a The 100 ship? i prefer guys. i have long dark blonde hair mixed with light blond and dirty blond and i have hazel green eyes. i am always the leader and i am really ambitious and fierce. i am really good at fighting and i have for everything a good strategy. i am a natural leader, smart, fighter, fierce, ambitious, mysterious and sarcastic but sometimes i am kind, loving and caring when it is about family and friends. my clan is: Azgeda and my hogwarts house is: Slytherin. i am falling for guys with: beautiful eyes, big and longer then me, muscular and beautiful hair
I SHIP YOU WITH ROAN!!!
With your ambition and leader skills you rise through Azgeda army ranks quickly. Is it any wonder that you catch the attention of the Azgeda Prince? Roan is in wonder of you when he sees you or thinks of you, and wonder he does. You are mysterious and could easy be proclaim as the definition on what a enigma is. He can’t help but admire you for your intelligence and experience in warfare and politics. He sees you as his equal in every way possible and believes whole-heartedly that there is no one better than you to rule by his side as his queen. A True leader who was born to lead her people. Then, there is a title to be claim, out of the two of you, who is the hothead of the relationship. While, some people would say you are the hothead, what with having a snap in your voice that can rival Queen Nia any day of the week when you want, and words that are cold and sarcastic enough to leave frostbite. Roan is the real hothead, his arrogance and naïve ways tend to want to lead him on the wrong path or swift to act without thought. You however are always one to have several strategies up your sleeves. always two steps ahead of everyone else. Where Roan can be to forgiving and place to much trust in the wrong people, you are not so easy convinced and you take offense to those who seem to think your not wise enough to make those educated decisions based on their hidden motives that they think you don’t see. You expect perfection and are greatly displeases with anything that is less than. It’s not your fault, you just want the best for Roan and most of all your clan. Roan can clearly see that and loves you unconditionally for it.
To Roan your beauty is unmatched by anyone. A rare beauty to him in the snowy landscapes you call home. He turns to mush when you show the loving side of yourself in the privacy of your shared chambers. You’ve never been comfortable showing such affections to anyone. It was distraction, weakling your resolve on what you desire most. However, things are entirely different when it comes to Roan. You’ve never been able to figure out why but have long since resigned to the fact that you may never know. Ironically, Roan loves you even more for your reserved nature because he knows that you truly love and care enough for him to show that vulnerable side of you. It means you trust him above all others.
You and Roan are a match to rival all others! You were made for each and neither of you can ever see a life without the other. You rule Azgeda as equals and will continue to do so until the day you draw your last breath.