“God, why is my future girlfriend, like, the prettiest girl ever?” Robin sighed dreamily as she watched Billie scan the aisles with Max, pushing her wheelchair along as she complained about the movie options her older sister was giving her. “It’s like…seriously not good for my heart, Steve.”
“I mean, I didn’t think she’d be your type, but sure. Billie’s pretty, I guess.” Steve shrugged as he flipped through the rentals. “I swear— the guy who rented Critter a month ago? Still late. I’m gonna write him a very strongly worded letter if he doesn’t come back this week.”
“Can we go back to the topic of how hot my future wife is?”
“Hot? We were talking about how pretty your delusional crush is. Hot is different.”
“It’s not delusional! It’s very possible!” Robin squawked. “And who cares, she’s both.”
“Hot means you wanna fuck her. Pretty means you wanna wrap her in your jacket and take her home for snuggles and hot cocoa.” Steve simplified and Robin frowned.
“Why can’t I have both? Wrap her in my jacket, take her home, snuggle her with some hot coca and then when it’s all gone I can—“
“No—“
“Sneak under the blanket and—“
“Robin, stop!”
“Touch her—“
“Ew!”
“Boobies!” Robin made grabby hands and Steve snorted.
“Boobies.”
“Boobies.” Robin smiled, finally getting it. “Billie likes boobies. Maybe. I think so.”
“Billie was a huge ladies man so—“
“Not a man!”
“Okay, not a man now, but she acted like one in the past!” Steve put his hands up in surrender. “She was a lady killer, okay?”
“Better.” Robin huffed out through her nose, turning back to rest her chin on her palm. “But what if she was like- double closeted? Like, what if when she realised she was a girl, she also realised she wants all the stuff normal girls want like…guys.”
“Don’t say it like you’re not normal. I mean, you’re weird and loud and annoying, all traits I find very loveable about you as my best friend, but you’re not abnormal cause you like girls, Robin.”
“I know that.” She grumbled softly, slightly touched regardless. Billie laughed at something Max said and Robin broke into a small, dopey smile. “She’s perfect.”
“She gave me a concussion once.”
“That’s hot.”
“Dude!”
“Dude.” Robin repeated slower, making steady eye contact. Steve matched it and eventually pursed his lips and nodded.
“It’s hot.”
“So hot.”
“She kicked my ass.” Steve sighed.
“So very hot.” Robin bit her lip as Billie bent down to grab a VHS off the bottom shelf, her tight jeans stretching over her ass. Robin turned to Steve to point it out only to see him already watching with appraisal. Robin smacked him hard in the arm.
“Ow!”
“Stop acting so gross to the love of my life!”
“She’s got a nice butt.” Steve spoke around a small pout, looking away.
“My butt. Eyes off.”
“I think I preferred when you were into Vickie.”
“Vickie is still finding herself and needed the space. We will always be friends, but we just aren’t compatible for a relationship right now.”
“But in future?” Robin turned to Steve with a serious expression.
“I marry Billie and we buy three cats named Marshmallow, Chocolate and Cracker. We call them the S’mores instead of our cats or kids. Also, we get a house together, something cozy but with enough room for two to four guests at a time. The kitchen is teal and the lounge room is red. We’re nicknamed the Christmas house because of it. Our neighbours love us for our classic wit and humour, but we have one neighbour who hates us because we go at it during his reading hour and lesbian sex goes a long time, hours in fact, so he’s not getting anything finished and we do not care because female pleasure will not be ignored. Also, we have motorcycle. She would rock it and I would drool as her passenger but never ride it because I’m a gay who can’t drive to save my life.”
“…You’ve really been thinking about this, huh?” Steve crossed his arms, looking her over as Robin nodded solemnly.
“Night and day since I saw her in that white summer dress a week after she got out of the hospital.”
“Well…What do you think, Billie? Sound fun? The S’mores is my favourite part.” Steve smirked as he picked up the returns and walked off. Robin’s eyes widened comically as she slowly turned around to face the blonde who looked just as startled as her.
“Um…I like the part with the motorcycle. And, I like red. More into blue than teal. I can compromise though.” She rubbed the back of her neck with a shy, playful smile and Robin’s face burned.
“Mm. Mhm. That’s— b-blues nice. You look…good in blue. R-really good. I love you - in blue! I mean. Yeah. A- a motorcycle sounds…awesome.” She breathed the last word with a nervous laugh, sinking into herself. She wished the floor would crack open again and swallow her up this time around.
“Thank you?” Billie let out a soft laugh, seemingly caught off guard by Robin’s anxious rambling. She placed the two movies down on the counter, one Max’s choice and another Billie’s. Robin started scanning them.
Max rolled as close to the counter as she could get before clearing her throat.
“Billie hasn’t been on a real date in a long time—“
“Max!” Billie hissed, cheeks going red as her sister continued.
“And I think you should ask her on one. Since you already plan on marrying her. You have my blessing by the way; as long as you don’t hurt her heart. It’s delicate. Like a flower.”
“Oh my god, please stop talking.” Billie groaned loudly into her hands, her red ears giving away her embarrassment.
“You can count on me, little Red.” Robin saluted her and Max smirked, rolling off to round the corner and attempt to roll over Steve’s toes.
“Please ignore her. Seriously. You don’t gotta—“ Billie took her hands down from her face, lips pursed. “I don’t know if you’re straight or gay or bisexual but I don’t want to date you if you’re thinking of me as a guy—“
“I like girls.” Robin interjected quickly, maybe a tad too quickly, words coming out cluttered. “I— kiss girls. Exclusively. I like girls. I like…you. A lot. I’d like to kiss you. Eventually! Not now. We should, um, build up to that stuff, I definitely don’t have the experience to just- jump in and smoosh faces.” She laughed, abrupt and loud, and quickly stopped, humiliating herself. “Sorry, I’m being weird. I just— get nervous. Around pretty girls.”
Billie stared at her with wide eyes.
“I mean…I’m glad you think I’m pretty?” Billie broke to a wondrous smile and Robin melted a little inside.
“You’re super pretty! Pretty hot. Uh, both. I should stop talking.”
“If you stop talking, how will you ask me on a date?” Robins eyes bugged out of her head.
“You wanna— with me?” She pointed at herself in bewilderment, looking back as if there could be someone else she was asking.
“I don’t know. You haven’t asked yet.” Billie grinned and Robin grinned back, a tad shyer as she ducked her head.
“Would you…like to see a movie sometime?”
“Drive-In, home movie, or cinema?” Billie quirked a brow and Robin’s brain record scratched.
“Uh, I don’t have a car. So I’ve never seen a…Drive-In show.”
“Well now you gotta.” Billie smirked. “Lemme pick you up tomorrow, after your shift?”
“Yeah?” Robin bloomed like a flower at the invitation.
“Yeah.” Billie’s smirk dimmed into a soft smile. “I’ll wear blue. Since you like it so much.”
“You can wear any colour. I like all of them! You— you looked good. Not the colour. Um, if that makes sense.”
“It does.” Billie grinned, fishing out some cash from her wallet. She handed it over and Robin’s fingers brushed hers. The brunette almost swooned. God, she was down bad. “See you tomorrow, Buckley.”
“R-Robin’s fine. If you, uh, if you want.”
“Okay. Robin.” She purred and Robin managed to stay composed just long enough for Billy to leave her to grab Max before crouching down behind the counter and silently screaming into her hands, shaking them all about in excitement.
She had a date. A real, genuine one!
She was one step closer to making Billie Hargrove a Billie Buckley.
when I started shipping it if I did: God I don’t remember. It was awhile ago. I’d seen some cute art of them on pixiv and I was like Oh No, I Ship It
my thoughts: it’s cute! I just really enjoy their friendship, them both having found something of a kindred spirit in each other, and having a friend to fall back on and rely on in Chaldea. I like the idea of them just being buddies, and that naturally progressing into something else over time as they get closer.
What makes me happy about them: Again, them just having someone they can rely on, and both having found a kindred spirit in Chaldea. Billy being a cheeky little shit and giving Robin a hard time, but being there for him where it counts. Them comforting each other when they’re having a hard time.
What makes me sad about them: Them potentially getting into fights over stuff and having bad times where they’re being stubborn and not seeing eye to eye and just making things hard for themselves by refusing to talk things out ;;
things done in fanfic that annoys me: I haven’t read any fics about them actually so I’ll just say that I don’t really like fanart that like. Makes Billy look like he’s 10 or something, or tries to create a power imbalance between him and Robin :///
things I look for in fanfic: Silly shenanigans
Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Davrob is my otp for Robin, and Billy/Ramses is my otp for Billy, so. Either of those! :3 I also ot3 them with Geronimo so that would be good too.
My happily ever after for them: Go roam the wilds like a couple of vagabonds... camp out under the stars... just do as they please together, having a good time, going wherever the wind takes them.
who is the big spoon/little spoon: Robin is the big spoon and Billy is the little
what is their favorite non-sexual activity: They enjoy playing card games with each other!
