A Bounty | Part 1| A Loki and Rocket Story
A/N: So the first part of this Loki & Rocket crackfic is finally done. It is based on the premise of what if... things went wrong when Rocket and Thor went back to Asgard and Thor bailed, stranding Rocket there. Naturally, he would team up with our Trickster.
Pairing: Loki & Rocket platonic (I mean is hate/annoyance platonic), gen fic.
Summary: After Thor stranded Rocket on Asgard, he teams up with Loki, and they hightail it off the planet for destinations unknown. When they reach Vanaheim, they split up, but there are forces at work intent on keeping this unlikely duo together.
Trigger Warnings: cursing, violence, kidnapping, more to come.
AS ALWAYS, THANK YOU FOR READING AND SUPPORTING MY WRITING. TAGLISTS ARE OPEN! PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU WISH TO BE ADDED.
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“Are you certain you can ACTUALLY fly this thing?” Loki questioned as the ship slowly lifted off the ground.
“You know, you’re awfully picky for a man who stuck in a prison cell thirty minutes ago.” Rocket deadpanned back as he worked the controls.
“I am no man, I am a god and I am—”
“Wait, let me guess, you’re burdened with glorious purpose?” Rocket didn’t even bother to look over in Loki’s direction, more concerned about not taking down the stone columns in front of him.
Loki blinked at Rocket. “Well actually, yes.” The ship rumbled as Rocket expertly maneuvered the ship out into the open air. “Acceptable piloting. Now, how did you know what I was going to say? Are you a magical creature?” He reached out to poke Rocket.
Rocket knocked Loki’s hand away. “Hey, hands off the merchandise. Everyone who has a chip on their shoulder feels they are burdened with ‘glorious purpose’.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“I also read your file.”
“I have a file?”
“You have an entire shelf.”
“Not sure if I should be impressed or insulted.”
“Probably a bit of both.” A klaxon went off. “Hey Burdened Guy, you any good with the weapons on this ship?”
“I am Loki of Asgard, Rightful King of Jotunheim—”
“So that’s a no.”
Loki stomped off towards the back of the ship and fired up the gunner station. “Am I any good with the weapons system?” he scoffed as the three Asgardian ships came up on the tactical screen.
He carefully took aim at the closest ship and fired just as their ship banked sharply and his shot went why. Loki slammed his fist against the control panel.
“THIS WOULD BE SIGNIFICANTLY EASIER IF YOU WOULD HOLD THE SHIP STEADY!” he yelled towards the cockpit.
“Excuse me, your Highness, I am trying to GET US OFF THIS PLANET!”
“WHICH IS USELESS IF THEY BLOW US UP!” Loki countered and squeezed off another shot in frustration, hitting the Asgardian ship.
He gave a little fist pump and then the ship rocked as the second ship’s shot connected.
“LESS CELEBRATING, MORE SHOOTING!” Rocket screamed back as the ship climbed towards the upper atmosphere.
“The first chance I get…” Loki grumbled as he worked the controls to get a clear shot at the second ship.
His first attempt missed, so he modified the weapon’s frequency and connected the second shot. The second ship barrel rolled into the third and they both fell into the silver ocean below. With a swagger, he headed back to the cockpit.
“They have been disposed of.” Loki plopped down next to him.
“And what do you want, a cookie? Gold Star? A tiara?” Rocket snapped as the ship finally left the atmosphere. The space stretched out in front of them as Rocket fell back into the pilot’s chair. He turned to Loki. “Name’s Rocket.”
Loki’s nose wrinkled at the creature sitting beside him. “What kind of name is Rocket?”
“What kind of name is Loki?” Rocket countered. “And how about ‘thank you for helping me escape’?” He got out of his chair and moved towards the back of the ship.
“Thank you?” Loki scoffed incredulously.
“You’re welcome.” Rocket called out from inside a storage container.
“I… you…” Loki growled in irritation and popped out of his seat. “Now hang on…” He stomped to where Rocket was throwing things left and right. “What in the Nine Realms are you doing?”
Rocket turned to face Loki and threw a mess kit. “Food. Or do Asgardian princes sustain themselves on ego and charm?”
“Has anyone ever called you an asshole?”
“All the time.” Rocket slumped on the storage container. “Is there any food on this fancy ass ship?”
“This ship isn’t intended for long distance interstellar travel. Just small jumps.” Loki crossed his arms.
“That is very disappointing. So tell me, your Majesty, where’s the nearest planet to buy provisions?”
“The ship could make the trip to Vanaheim, but if you think I’m going to—”
“To Vandermeer, it is!” Rocket hopped down from his perch and skittered to the pilot controls.
“VANAHEIM… And I am not going with you.” Loki tugged on his tunic.
“Then by all means, jump out.” His furry finger lingered over the hatch button. Rocket glanced over at Loki and had a rare moment of empathy for the god. “I know why they had you locked up. It wasn’t your fault. I remember being angry like you once. Wanting a dark corner to disappear in.” He quickly punched in the coordinates for Vanaheim after consulting the star charts and started the autopilot. “Once we get to Vanaheim, you can be rid of me and whatever you else.”
Loki listened to Rocket, but if his words had any effect on him, it didn’t show. A calculated behavior learned throughout his childhood. The constant taunts, jabs, and jeers from Odin, and to a less degree, Thor. He lifted his chin and gazed down his nose at Rocket. “Finally, something you said made sense.”
“Oh, do you not understand me? I’ll speak slow and use hand signals.” Rocket retorted sarcastically, leaning back in the pilot’s chair. “We should be there in about 5 hours.” He grinned at Loki. “So when the big hand is like this…” Rocket placed one arm straight up and down, “And the little hand is like this…” He jutted out his other arm at an awkward angle, mimicking the hands of the clock. “We will be at Vanderpump.”
“VANAHEIM! Home of Vanir, Emerald of the Nine Realms. If you are going to insist on butchering its name, then don’t do so in front of me!” Loki huffed.
“Sorry, Vanaheim.” Rocket hopped down from his seat and walked away. “Lighten up, Loki.” He kept far away from Loki for the rest of the trip, pretending to nap at the back of the ship.
-
Loki squinted as he adjusted the rough fabric of the gray cloak around his shoulders. He was doing his best not to draw attention. Which was made difficult by Rocket using him as a personal lookout tower.
“Ow, do you mind?” Loki swatted at Rocket.
“No, you’re actually quite comfortable for a skinny little bastard. Do you work out?” Rocket pulled a pair of some sort of binoculars and looked out at the crowd. “Over there.”
“What, that bar over there? You really think you are going to—” He stopped as Rocket scampered down his back and took off into the crowd. “NOW HANG ON A MINUTE!!”
Several heads turned to stare at Loki, and he pushed his way past them. “Haven’t you ever seen a disagreement before?”
By the time he reached the rundown bar, Loki found Rocket speaking with two rough looking Vanir. “Now you can’t go running off.. like that?”
The larger of the two stood and came toe to toe with Loki. He smelled and looked as though baths were things he did twice a year, whether he needed it or not. “You know this guy?”
“He was just leaving.” Rocket shot Loki a look. “I hitched a ride with him from Asgard and now our business is finished.” Rocket nudged the smaller of the two men in the shoulder. “You know how those fancy pants Asgardians are. You give them tiniest taste of adventure and the next thing you know they think they’re your best friend.”
“We are NOT friends!” Loki stood his ground, undeterred by the size of the Vanir. “And neither are these…” He tugged on his cloak. “gentlemen. And I use that term as loosely as language allows.”
“Is he calling us ugly?” The bigger man reached into his cloak.
“What if I am?” Loki did the same, manifesting a dagger in his hand.
“Gentlemen, gentlemen…” Rocket leaped in between them. “There’s no need to resort to violence. You’re both very very handsome gentlemen.” Rocket grabbed Loki by the hand and turned him around. “Are you trying to get us killed?” He hissed.
“Quite the opposite, actually. You know nothing of these men.”
“And neither do you. Listen, I appreciate your concern, but believe me when I tell you, you should be more afraid of me than of them. Now go and catch a royal carriage home or wherever the hell it is you plan on going.” With a wave, Rocket dismissed Loki and returned to the two Vanir. “Now as I was saying, I’m looking to go to…”
Loki stood there, watching Rocket talk with the men, and he slinked away to another corner of the bar. He ordered a cup of mead and some mushroom soup, which came with a hunk of brown bread. He couldn’t really see anything through the midday crowd, and he strained to hear the conversation, only catching snatches of words and Rocket’s raucous and annoyingly fake laugh.
Soon, the soup and mead was gone and Loki paid with some coin he pulled from interdimensional storage, leaving a generous tip for the young Vanir maiden who had checked on him several times during his meal and even offering a refill of his mead on the house. As he made his way to the front of the bar, he spied Rocket and the two men heading out a side entrance. What he also noticed was another man, with heavy scarring on the side of his face, get up from a table and follow the group towards the entrance. With a sigh, he stepped outside and turned to find an alley next to the bar.
“HEY!” Rocket yelled as the scarred man grabbed him by the neck. “Who the hell are you?”
The mysterious bar patron smiled sinisterly at Rocket, holding him up by the scruff of his neck. “Feisty, a fighter. You’ll fetch a pretty penny.” His voice rough as though someone had taken sandpaper to the man’s vocal chords.
“The animal is with us.” The tall Vanir stepped in front of the mystery man.
“Well, that’s a shame.” Bolts of dark red energy shot out from underneath the man’s cloak, incapacitating both men.
Loki ducked behind the corner, pulling the cloak’s hood around his face, peeking around the corner. He saw the man clamp on some handcuffs onto Rocket before shoving him in a bag. Just before Rocket’s head disappeared into the bag, his eyes caught Loki’s and he pleaded silently for Loki to help. Without knowing whether the source of those energy bolts was from a weapon or magic, Loki didn’t dare risk making his presence known and losing the advantage of surprise.
He watched the man heave Rocket over his shoulder and head down the alley and away from the two Vanir men and Loki. Once he felt it was safe, Loki stepped out and ran towards the two men who were just coming to.
“Do you know that man?” Loki questioned as he helped them sit up, his cloak falling from his head.
The smaller of the two shook his head, groggy and in pain. “Scyther Pruhl. Notorious bounty hunter and black market dealer.” He stared at Loki. “Are you…”
Loki waved it off. “I’m not him. I’m nobody.” He didn’t want to answer questions about himself, knowing every moment put more distance between him and this Scyther Pruhl.
“But you look just like him. The Crown Prince, but that’s impossible… he’s…” the taller man muttered, coming to, shaking his head.
“Imprisoned on Asgard?” Loki added. “That’s what I heard too. It’s been terrible for business as an impersonator.” The two men looked at him, confused. “I mean I had to put these good looks to work.” He grinned. “Due, however, to Prince Loki’s unfortunate incarceration, I’ve had to resort to less than legal methods for maintaining my income.”
“Oh, like picking pockets and what not?”
“Something like that.” He screaming internally, these people are idiots! “Now where could I find this Mr. Pruhl?”
“The docks down at the end of town.” They pointed in a general direction.
“Thank you.” He rushed off.
-
Scyther ducked and weaved through the crowds as Rocket squirmed in the bag, his screams muffled.
“Listen here, you rat. Keep it down or I’ll have to take extreme measures to keep you quiet.”
Rocket contemplated his choices and decided remaining conscious was his best chance of escape. He quietly examined the cuffs Scyther placed on him. Standard issued magnetic cuffs, but Rocket couldn’t pick them in the dark. After about 20 minutes of being jostled, Scyther unceremoniously dropped the bag containing Rocket to the ground. Rocket strained to hear the conversation occurring next to him.
“My ship ready to go?” Scyther questioned as he pulled a few coins to pay his bill to the dock manager.
“Full fueled and serviced, Mr. Pruhl.” The young attendant squeaked out, his eyes transfixed on Scyther’s scars.
He growled at the kid. “Stop staring. You’re making me uncomfortable.” He pulled back a coin, intended to be a tip for the young man.
“Yes, sir.” His head lowered and he let loose a small whimper as Scyther took back the coin. “Is there anything else today?”
Scyther thought about it. “Can I get enough rations for a 3 day hyperspace trip? For two? Well, one human and one pet.” He gave the bag a kick.
“Ow!” Rocket yelled. “Hey, I’m in here!”
The young man jumped. “Yes, sir. Where you headed?”
Scyther lit a cigar, blowing smoke at the kid. “Taruta.”
The boy’s eyes grew three sizes. Taruta was a place he only heard about in stories by the men who frequented the dock. A place where the seedy underbelly of the universe thrived. If there was anything nefarious or highly illegal, Taruta was the place to go to find it or someone who could acquire it for you. “Wow…” he whispered, as he shoved rations into a bag and handed it to Scyther.
“Wow is right, kid.” He picked up the bag of rations and Rocket like they weighed nothing and headed towards his ship.
-
Loki could run faster than Thor. What Thor had in strength, Loki always made up in speed. He raced through streets of the town, shoving people out of the way and knocking over at least one cart filled with apples and other produce. He reached the docks and glanced around for any sign of Scyther or Rocket. Spying a young boy who appeared to work there, Loki approached.
“Can you tell where Scyther is?” Loki huffed, trying to catch his breath.
“You just missed him, mis…” The boy dropped the container of spare parts in his hands and trembled. “I mean your Highness.” He fell into a fumbling bow.
Loki stood up to his full height and straightened his clothes. “Thank you, young man, for showing respect. Now I command you to tell me where Scyther Pruhl is headed.” Loki figured he would take advantage of the boy being intimidated for as long as he could.
“Taruta.” His voice still shaking.
“Very good. Now, I am going to commandeer one of these ships under authority of the AllFather and the crown to follow him. He has…. jail breaked an enemy to the throne.” Loki lied. “And they have tasked me to bring them both back to Asgard.”
“Wow….” the boy whispered. “You could take the ship I have been working on.” He pointed to the docking bay at the far end. “It will get you where you need to go.”
“And food. I require sustenance for my journey.”
“Of course, your Highness. Anything.” He quickly shoved rations into a bag, which Loki took.
“Thank you, young man. You have earned the gratitude of your prince.”
The boy made some unintelligible sounds as Loki walked off. He hit the button to the dock’s door and step inside to see his vehicle and his shoulders slumped. “You have got to be kidding me.”
Two Days Later
Two Einherjar towered over the young man. “Tell us, boy, have you seen the escaped prisoner, The Crown Prince Loki?”