Of course Roderick had known that he was gonna have to go back the next day but he hadn’t expected his usual team to be waiting outside the door. How long had they been there? Had they been following? Probably. Eventually he did open up his eyes and crawled out from the makeshift bed he had made.
The night before he had found one of the buildings in construction that had been empty for a whiiile. Was it the best place to stay? Not at all. But he knew other kindred had been doing the same so it was something. And with a few cardboard boxes it hadn’t been that different from his usual room. Except now of course, there were people waiting for him. that didn’t happen.
Without opening the door he knocked. “I know…. I know…..” he mumbled it softly head pressing up against the door. Philipe was the one that responded. “and yet. You made us waste our resources on you fucking blank. How hard can it be to follow orders? You’ve been doing this for what. How long? 60 fucking years?!” the statement cut through the tension leaving Roderick shaking. He knew he was no soldier but he had almost forgotten how long he had been pretending. 60 years… 80 years of his life he had been with these people and what did he start dreaming of the moment he figured out mia was back? He was an awful unthankful fuck of a person. “I… I’m sorry sir… I… I just wanted some… rest…” “From what? Your literal purpose?!” “No sir…. I just….. I… I haven’t had a break… and.. I thought that-“ Philipe started to laugh. “You thought?! Roderick! Buddy! You are a leech. A fucking blank. You are a weapon a fucking dog. Nothing more. You don’t need to think bout getting a break. Cuz you wont get them because you don’t get tired. You aren’t alive! You aren’t even a person.” “ye-yes si.. sir…..” Its not that the words hurt him. he had heard them for years now. It was the hope breaking inside him that stung enough to have the bloodied tears start to pool in his eyes. He should’ve just stayed. If he had just been good maybe they would’ve told him he had done a good job. That was worth a lot of the pain. “Open up the door Bloem. I need you to walk with us and cause no further problems. The captain wants to speak with you at base together with doctor Proust. Hope you had enough rest for the next 60 years.” Roderick didn’t even respond. He simply opened up the door staring at the ground trying to let his hair hide him but ofcourse the entire team was staring at him. the entire walk back… felt awful.
Not as awful as the scolding from the captain. He had been lucky that major had gone off to brittain for some business, else the scolding would’ve been even worse. It always surprised him that they always knew just how much damage they could inflict on him without making him torpor or frenzy. Then again. He was the one that taught them that for the most part. the captain though… the French captain enjoyed it way too much and it made Roderick feel hatred. Something he hated more than the beating he took.
He should’ve known it was gonna get bad the moment they ripped his fangs out as a safety procedure and they put his hands in the heaviest cuffs they had laying around. Even the room they brought him to was a dead give away. It had big speakers inside in the wall that would blast sound so loud it had made rodericks ears bleed. Sensitive hearing wasn’t always your friend.
But Roderick endured. As he had done for many times before. This was just the regular. What was less common was that he didn’t get thrown into his chamber but instead got dragged over to the back side of the med bay. Of course it wasn’t for him to get fixed up. Now that was all at the front. The back was for the more experimental parts. The area where a lot of the screaming would always come from. Where ghouls and ex colagues would disappear into. Maybe he had finally done it? Fucked up enough that he was to be released of his duties. It almost made the dragging through the med bay feel comfortable…
Of course this wasn’t the case. He was still valuable as long as he kept his manners. And one way to ensure that was the chip right in his neck. But that had already been there since he ran last time. Now this time it was his turn to start the deprogramming. A long process to ensure his loyalty of conditioning. Eliza had specifically come from the FIRSTLIGHT team to study the effects of the deprogramming on kindred. And Roderick, as he often was, was the perfect test subject.
It was only in the late hours of the night that he was dragged back to his chamber. Though he expected that wouldn’t stay for long. His book was gone. And his little cacti had been destroyed. Normally he had cried about loosing the last thing he had left. But after everything he had experienced all he could do was sit down on the mattress and grab his phone. He wasn’t sure how long he would even be allowed to keep it.