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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
With Heart Hardened
Chapters: 1/1 Word Count: 1,416 Fandom: James Bond (Craig Movies) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: James Bond/Q Characters: James Bond, Q (James Bond) Additional Tags: Established Relationship, Angst, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Torture
Summary: James Bond has been ordered to complete an impossible mission. Q vows to bring him back alive, even if Q has to risk his own life to do it. But Bond will do whatever it takes to stop Q from following him into danger—even betray the trust of the man he loves.
Suzanne Borders of BadVR and director Kelsey Amara sexually assaulted me
posting this for my friend. hang in there girl! -
I apologize, this will be a long post. I desperately need somewhere to vent before I move forward in attempting to seek justice. I also need to warn other young women and even under-age girls about these women. Suzanne Borders is a serial rapist of women. And her frenemy
Kelsey Amara is just as bad, maybe even worse (she likes *young* girls).
I met Suzanne in a strip club I danced in. She ordered me
for a VIP (private dance). She was very lewd, far more forward than most male customers, and she took liberties. After, she asked for my number. Against my better judgment, I gave her my number. But I told her I was in a relationship with a guy. Borders asked me out, just hounded me repeatedly for months. She said she’d wait it out. She did. He dumped me not long after for his high school sweetheart.
I was really down about the breakup, but I went into dance
that week at the club anyway. Suzanne was there that night. She approached me after she ordered another dance in the V.I.P. I expected her to ask me out again, already on my guard. But she surprised me. She said she could see that something wasn’t right and that if I ever wanted to talk to someone who had been through her share of bad breakups, to call her. Anytime. She also gave me the number of a really great therapist. There didn’t seem to be anything ulterior coming from her. No come ons.
It changed the way I looked at her.
I ended up calling her not long after. We talked about so many things that night, and not once did she really try to take advantage of my rebound status. We were actually friends after that, and I felt she was someone that I could count on.
A few months later she asked me out, but she explained that it was all pretense. A friend from back home was flying in and she really needed the buffer. She implied that the woman was her sister and that their relationship was contentious at best. So I agreed, even though I felt awkward about being in the middle of a family squabble.
I was expecting a bar and was relieved when she took me to restaurant downtown. The other woman was waiting for. Pretty with long hair and brown eyes, she was very small. She made me feel like a giant at 5’5”. She looked me over shrewdly, then frowned a little like she was hurt and trying to work the problem of my presence out in her head. She recovered and said her name was “Kelsey”.
Yes, the same Kelsey Amara I mentioned in my opening paragraph. She was very boisterous and combative in her arguments with Suzanne, and it got worse as a second round of beers arrived. A family was seated few tables down when Amara looked over a girl at their table, commenting on her “buttery thick thighs” and how she’d “like to put her face between them, show her heaven”. The girl couldn’t have been more than 14. It was grotesque, even considering the things I’d seen and heard as a stripper.
I finished my second beer and ran to the restroom, needing a break. Understanding why Suzie had wanted a wingman. I could hear them arguing about Kelsey’s boorish behavior as I walked away. When I got back, there was a third round of beers. The tone had changed. I saw them holding hands, both quiet, looking at each other across the table. It felt intimate. They saw me and pulled apart.
I felt nervous, and I did what I always do then. I drank. I finished the third beer, knowing it had been a mistake. A very bad mistake. I got up again and fell over. I heard Suzanne say she would get me home, then felt hands on me, helping me up…removing my clothes, touching and fondling and kissing me roughly.
I woke up from this in the back of a stranger’s car, with both Suzie and Amara in the front arguing with each other. My vagina was on fire, and so was my anus. I wondered, stupidly, what had happened. They pulled up at a stop, seeing I was awake. They both looked a little panicked.
They got me upstairs to my place. I noticed the car was a green hatchback, a Subaru I think. Amara’s. I could smell my sex on both of them. I felt so humiliated. Amara told me I had been wonderful, though a bit too aggressive toward her. Suzie told her to “shut up” and said that I was simply gorgeous. That I was always gorgeous, and she wouldn’t hold any of the things I had done to her sexually against me, or expect anything more. I was passionate, she said. And she was tough, she could take the bruises I left.
I just stared at them dumbfounded. Then I whispered that I didn’t remember anything after the restaurant. They made a quick retreat after that.
Only later did I realize what had happened. They had planned this before Suzanne asked me to go the restaurant. They had staged it then drugged my drink while I was in the bathroom. Rohypnol, that’s what I was sure they had used on me.
I confronted Borders about this. She of course denied everything, accusing me of making a pass at Kelsey, who was herself an assault survivor. She then told me that the three of us had consented to a threesome that night, which I had initiated by pursuing “her good friend”. And that Kelsey was the one who was now afraid. Afraid of ME. That they were each other’s witnesses to my violent behavior toward “poor Kelsey”. That no one would believe different when they looked at and heard from her.
She implored me to say nothing, because she had just barely been able to talk Kelsey out of filing charges against me for the exceedingly physical sex acts I performed on her. Many, she explained, that Kelsey was not happy with at all.
I backed down. Thinking I was in the wrong. I even thought about apologizing to Kelsey!
That was until I started hearing similar stories from female acquaintances that also knew Borders and Amara. Some had friends that had told them the same things I had. Others had experienced it firsthand. Sexual abuse through coercion in some cases, in other cases the casting couch. In more cases I heard the word I was afraid to use: rape.
Sexual assault and battery following a night of drinking. Usually with terrible wooziness midway through the night, with women waking up to the feeling of terrible internal bruising and the feeling of rough sex.
Now a number of us are willing to tell our stories. And charges are being looked into. Lawsuits will be coming against these two.
Any woman that has contact with these two should be very careful. Never go anywhere alone with them. Do not allow them to bully you through job offers. And please please PLEASE do not leave your under-age daughters alone with Kelsey Amara. She was abused as a child and now she does the same to teens and pre-teens.
Currently Suzanne Borders runs a company called Bad VR.
Hoje meu café da tarde vai ser a base de calmante! #Rohypnol 💊💊💊 (em Porto Ferreira) https://www.instagram.com/p/CN5ZKSvpmjx/?igshid=42t36zo94g80
Sick Romance
By: Ianem005
Name? Carl James Jackson, a bartender with no family or close friends, age 24, an average person, and my next prey .
I was currently walking through the alleys of the big city in which I resided, my long black hair flowing behind me, as my calculative amber eyes looked in all directions for anything abnormal or movement. Today I had been looking after Carl to see if something had changed in his schedule. It was all right. Nothing has changed. It was all in the right place.
A wicked smile formed on my pale pink lips, and a subtle blush tinted my soft, frail skin as I looked at Carl through his bedroom window while he slept peacefully in his bed.
“Soon enough, my dear.”
I whispered to the air as I separated from the window glass, not before taking a photo of his sleeping form, and returned to my home as I carried the body over my shoulder. It wasn’t easy to move around without being seen, but I needed a meal for this month, or else I would starve to death. During the walk to my apartment, the only thing I could think of was Carl. Oh Carl… Since the first day I met him in the bar he worked at, I´ve been looking after him. In the beginning, it was just as a predator would, but as the time passed, I couldn’t help but fall in love with the man that was supposed to be my next meal to end up becoming the drug I wanted myself.
Days passed, and my love for that man only grew and intoxicated my mind. I needed him so bad, by my side and no one else, he is destined to be with me! Today I would make him a little visit at the bar he worked in, become friends, and then just SNAP! HE WILL BE TRAPPED! HE WILL BE MINE AND ONLY MINE! He will not escape me. Ever. I just need him to trust me a little bit to fall right into the honey trap I had prepared just for him.
As the night fell over the city, I prepared myself and went out of my apartment and started walking to the bar, of course, dressed nicely for my beloved Carl. Just as I entered the night local, the heavy smell of alcohol and smoke from cigarettes entered my senses, and my expression converted into one of disgust, but as soon as it appeared, it disappeared, my act will not fall so quickly. I needed to win the heart and trust of my dear, after all.
As I went to the bar counter, I saw the person I was looking to meet face to face for so long. I went over to him and asked for a Cosmopolitan.
“Here you go,” said Carl passing the drink to me.
“Thank you~,” I responded in a flirty tone winking at him.
As the night passed, we continued to talk and flirt, joking here and there, and started knowing each other a little more, or at least on his part, I already knew all he was telling me, and more, I knew so much more about him. In the end, we exchanged numbers and planned on seeing each other some other time. As the bar closed, I waited for him outside and followed him to his house without being seen. People would say that this was stalking or something terrible, but I´m just making sure he is safe! There is nothing wrong with taking care of someone you love!
As we continued seeing each other from time to time, he finally invited me to his home for dinner. Today was the day I would have him. I just needed to make him fall asleep.
“Rohypnol would work.”
I thought to myself as I took said drug, putting it in my purse, and started walking out of my apartment and to Carl’s house. As I arrived at the said house, I knocked, and my dear opened the door in less than 5 seconds, as if he was waiting for me in the door, like a lost puppy waiting for their owner to come back. Oh, how sweet of him was that!?
I couldn’t resist the urge of hugging him, jumping into his strong arms, and just bite- oh, I need to control myself a little more, don’t I? He closed the door after I came in and took off my jacket. Like the gentleman he is.
“Today is going to be such fun, don’t you think?” He asked me as we entered the kitchen.
“Of course, it will be! After all, we are together, aren’t we?” I said in a joking tone, oh, but how serious I was actually.
As the afternoon passed, it was almost time for diner. As Carl cooked, I went to the bathroom and did my necessities, and after that, I prepared the table for us to… eat.
“I hope you like Milanesa,” He said, putting a plate with said dish in front of me. I just smiled and nodded.
“Yes, I love it,” I said, lying through my teeth.
He went to the kitchen once more, and I used this chance to put the drug in his food. As he returned with a crystal bottled water and two cups, we made a brindis and started eating. We chatted while we ate, but something was wrong. The drug didn’t seem to take any effect on him, but on the other hand, I was starting to feel dizzy, my vision blurred, and I couldn’t help but close my eyes.
“What… is happening…?” I asked in a sleepy voice as my body stopped responding to me.
“Oh, darling... “ He started saying in a honey-sweet tone. “Did you think I wouldn’t notice? From the start of it all, you were my prey. The only thing I needed to do was attract your attention and enchant you.” He stood up as my vision blurred. How could this possibly have happened? How did I fail…?
He embraced me, holding me close as he explained in a hushed tone.
“I saw the drug, how you took it, and planned all your moves. I saw it all…”
His voice started fading with my consciousness.
“Now, you will be mine. Forever.” That was the last thing I heard before falling asleep in my captor’s arms.
Now I’m captive by the man- no, the monster I used to love. I need to escape, run as far as I can! But I can't … the chains that held me captive here won’t break, everything I tried is useless, and the only way to communicate with the outside world is through these pages… please, if someone finds this… please help m-
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Rohypnol (ロヒプノール)
真っ白な帆布に色附ける様に 脳裏の寡黙さを後悔させたら 経験は如何様? 価値を閲して 記憶の改竄に腦を呈して As if to put color to a blank canvas, if I’m made to regret the reticence of my mind, what would that be like? I appraise its value and display my brain to the falsification of my memories. 虔しい採餌は憂いに塗れて 調味料は多目で 味蕾を穿った 緩やかな最果てを 最終章を ドラマチックな展開を期待していた The reserved hunt was caked in sorrow, and the seasonings pierced my taste buds in larger quantity. I was hoping for all the loose ends to result in some dramatic development in the last chapter. オールド・クロックにロヒプノール錠 途切れ闕けていた 逆毛立っていた性で 噫! 炭酸水にC2H5OH 甘い不条理に 迷い込んで失策っている The rohypnol tablets¹ on the old clock were cracked and chipped. Agh, I hate the way my hair was sticking up! Alcohol² in my soda water, I’ve lost my way and gone blundering into sweet absurdity.
伱間を塞ぐ様に In order to plug the gap in you. 百済ない愛で繋いでいた なんて 思えばそう 記憶に身合っていて 恨んでいたって 燻んだ思いで 幼さで帰属している We were tied together by a worthless³ love, and, yes, when I think about it, my memories do suit my body. Although I resent it, my smouldering recollections are attributed with childishness. 「愛在る正解を、ただ生きていたいだけ。」 ”I simply want to live knowing the right answer imbued with love.” 稚い考えを正して征く様に 病理の外側に骰子を焚べたら 独り歩きをする流言飛語は 震えを止めたくて 袖口を握った If in order to correct such juvenile ideas I could’ve fueled the dice on the exterior side of pathology, baseless rumors would’ve taken on a life of their own, and wanting to cease their trembling, clutched at my sleeve. たったらた、たったらた tattarata, tattarata 腐っていたって 答えは至って 簡単に分かり切った繫累は 他人の情に浸かって沈んだ 明らかに勘違いだと 分かっていたんだ Even though it went rotten, the answer was incredibly, plainly obvious. All my encumbrances⁴ immersed themselves and sunk into other people’s emotions. I understood that clearly, I had the wrong idea about something. 畢竟、間欠的な報酬を受けることで 現在、生きている 軈て、最底辺な終末を 二人に於いて So to sum up,⁵ receiving intermittent remuneration is my reality, and I’m living it. Before long, we’ll arrive at the ultimate conclusion. 眩んで征くように 盗んで征くように 無理矢理ぎゅっと、奪って欲しいな。 As if dazzlingly, as if stealingly, I want you to forcibly hold me tight and snatch me away.
百済ない愛で繋いで欲しいよ 洗腦して 愛と鞭と暴力で くるわないように くるわないように ように ように はなれないように I want you to tie us together with a worthless love. Brainwash me with love and the whip and violence so that I don’t go mad, so that I don’t go mad, go mad, go mad. So that we never lose each other.⁶ 「記憶を捨て切れないで、苦しい侭で。」 “Don’t throw your memories away, painful as they are.” ¹錠 can mean “tablet,” but it’s also the kanji for “lock.” This line might be interpreted as “The rohypnol lock on the old clock was cracked and chipped.” ² C2H5OH is the chemical formula for ethanol, the type of alcohol used in alcoholic drinks. ³“Worthless” is spelled 百済ない instead of its normal 下らない. ⁴This word has the connotations of “family members who depend on you” or “things that tie you down to one place.” ⁵ 詰まり is spoken but 畢竟, “after all,” is written. ⁶ はなれない is spelled without kanji, so there may be another possible meaning to this line: “So that I never break free from you.”
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