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victorians ascribed the petunia with two conflicting meanings. it was said to represent anger or deep resentment or it could convey the message, “your presence soothes me.” a conflicting message for those perhaps not secure or aware enough in a relationship to know the difference. they could also be used as an intentional deceit by the giver to imply one meaning or another. though usually meaning would be designated by color, the intention could remain hidden if the giver chose to do so. a wise warning, maybe, that even if we think we know others’ intentions, not everything may be as it seems. sometimes the most devastating things can be hidden behind the glamour of something nice.

#MY FAVORITE LITTLE RAT HAND BOY I LOVE LOVE LOVE HIM SO VERY MUCH #hiiii ely <3 i hope you like :)#the terror #theterroredit #robert golding #rolding #i've said it before and i'll say it again: if you like tarnell but do not like rolding then you cannot be my friend #also did you even watch the terror they were besties?!#anyway rolding is one of -if not the most-important character-to the third act #all acts really - he's truly a main character even if his screen time is lacking because he is involved in every major action #throughout the show and is not a 'blind follower' of hickey but a willing and active participant; like hickey has the charisma and #the ambition - yes - but tozer has the skill - billy the brains - and rolding has the deception #he's the perfect spy and even tho they were desperate to believe anything at that point - he still pulls one over on crozier and little #and completes his revenge arc that was set from the beginning of the show bc he and hickey were FRIENDS and had loving friendships #with evans - strong - and young and their friends died horrific and tragic deaths and were treated as though they weren't so #but sure let's have a full funeral and speech for sir john's fucking leg #i know the show could only do so much and represent so much but as it stands it perfectly represents the class and hierarchy present #but i digress - goldings anger and resentment is so palpable and tangible while hickey's remains subdued and calculated - but they're both #mad af and they act on it - not excusing their actions obvs - but their motivations began (and for golding - seem to have remained)#out of love and friendship and idk why (I KNOW WHY) crozier and bridgens and blanky get all the praise for the same thing #that hickey and golding and billy and tozer are doing (and doing MUCH better if i might add)#rolding wanted revenge for his friends that were treated as though they didn't matter by the men who were supposed to ensure that they did #and in the end of his arc he believes he achieves it - bringing crozier to hickey was supposed to ensure his end #by the point only a select few are still holding out hope for being rescued or surviving -the other have moved to acceptance or indifferene #but golding is one character that remains sane and whole until his end is met and it's through his anger & resentment that he achieves this #through his love he is able to survive to see their deaths not held in vain and to bring their suffering to justice #his is one of the only arcs brought to fully realization and the fact that it is based in love is so fulfilling -even if his own end is bad #from start to finish - he is underestimated and invisible - it's only in his greatest moment - his greatest act of love do we see him fully #and ITS THE BEST I LOVE HIM #i will never be free

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