Thinking not very visible lately (apathetic, not voicing anything) but see activity here last couple of days.. and tonight have been fairly vocal, fronting in body even. Don't know for sure what it is, just feels turbulent lately. Have been sick, maybe it's that? He's had to do lots of doctor's visits, driving, things I can't be there for but I feel. Uncomfortable day, he was polite and patient where I was scared and wanted to bare teeth to people was told just want to help.
So tired of being sick- and sick in a way that makes it worse when we think bad things! Crying and growling becomes [worse physical health, more severe symptoms], feels like can't emote, so bad. Then other medicine- for different thing- getting delayed for stupid reasons and we want it SO BAD. Rough time lately, getting better but rough time for a little bit now. I'm good at surviving that though. I can take whatever until surviving becomes living again because living is awesome. Will survive so we can live again.
