#s!cherry

[flower-sunflower-blog]

What I think will actually happen in the Shelter lore

Ok, so…I’m kinda nervous about this xD

I’ve been wanting for a while to share my thoughts and analysis about the lore, and what I think will actually happen. This is always the part I enjoy the most, connecting the dots, interpreting a driving direction and thus giving the whole sense to the events occurring in the story. So...

Beings above

From what we know for now, Shelter is under the control/supervision (?) of some entities, I straight up call them gods xD It's mainly because s!Artea’s straight up used this term and referred to this idea. In general, there is a recurring theme of religion within this universe. 

I also think that the gods are common knowledge for everyone, and we, the audience, are the only ones left out about indepth details about them and their nature. They seem to have great power over everything. For me, they’re in this kind of neutral-bad area, as the control they have over this world is not something we could call…legit. 

They don’t seem to be the kind of superior beings granted with perfect moral standing and act upon a greater good. They’re straight up doing what they want, based on their own rules, and get away with this only because THEY are the superior beings. And how much they’re a big deal to you depends on how much you oppose their rules. 

That's why a lot of characters can actually have a chill life under them, as they either don’t have any reason to oppose them, don’t care, are fine living here as it is implied some came from worst places, and so and so. The “before Shelter” of the characters is something interesting to figure out for me, in order to understand everyone’s position and personnal struggles. 

For now i’d say :

s!Shade and s!Elk are chilling and the gods aren’t a big deal to them, at least not yet.

s!Hoot, s!Sweev, s!Ram, and maybe s!Heiwa, were in such a bad spot before coming in the Shelter, they just love being here despite everything.

s!Hayden and s!Luh have their own personal struggles to deal with for now. Maybe sAmora and s!Veni as well ? There are small moments where they seem to have things going on in their life, but we didn't see much yet.

s!Forest and s!Void, when they talked about it, seemed rather skeptical about the god situation, but just made the best of it without making trouble. 

In between, some of them seem to have a personal struggle related to the gods. The obvious one is s!Artea, I also kinda think there is something up with s!Miel and s!Void and their relationships with god entities that are still unknown. s!Lea seemed to have kind of an involvement with the magic gods altho it’s still mysterious. And finally, s!Mine didn’t get involved with gods yet, but some hints could make us think she’s a goddess. 

Safe or fair ?

The only one for now who seemed to straight up oppose to the gods is s!Cherry, thus showing us that this opposition have consequences. And the said consequences seems to also have collateral damage sometimes. That’s why gods’ opposition seems to be a collective deal : if you get in trouble, there is a chance you’re not the only one who will suffer from it.

Actually, there is also a chance that s!Ana is the one containing them, preventing them to go even harder on people. As if the “gold sacrifice” was a ritual that allowed the good to be less likely to lash out on people. 

In general, everyone is having a rather nice life, this world is still described as “safe” and a place you can enjoy living in. BUT it may not have always been that way, because some conversation give this sort of impression that work have been done in order to make it the way it is now. Again, I think it’s greatly linked to s!Ana.

If this world is peaceful, this world doesn’t seem fair. It can become an issue when, in parallel with this overall god situation, the members have their own backstories and motives. At the end, some people are in a fairer situation than others. Clearly s!Cherry is not happy with her current situation. And some people seem in a tougher spots than others. Altho we need more details, I think it could be the case for : s!Miel, s!Lea, s!Hayden, s!Luh, recently s!Void etc. 

It’s where stand the dilemma of choosing between doing things in order maintain  peace, or doing things in order to make things right. And I IMMEDIATELY thought about s!Pomme involvement in the story. s!Pomme has the goal to keep everyone safe, and surely will make actions in order to keep everyone peaceful, I think she’ll likely side with s!Ana. But s!Pomme has also this side of her who can’t stand unfairness, who doesn't accept abiding to the will of selfish beings and their arbitrary rules, who wants to burn everything. But would she risk to put danger upon her and her friends for this ? 

Losing battle

And we finally get to s!Ana’s case. I really see s!Ana as the driving force of the story. Her goal is to keep everyone safe and peaceful, in order to do so she both have to deal with satisfying the gods and preventing them to come after them, and with the member’s personal struggle when the said struggles can be a threat to the peace. 

s!Ana is a good soul and she cares for the well being of her found family. But I also feel like she worked so hard to keep things the way they are for her efforts to be wasted. She’s currently submitting 100% to the gods, she’s doing actions for everyone's common well being. It’s such a huge burden she have to carry when she’s only one person who doesn’t always know best.While I still have not listened to the playlist, I saw that a lot of the songs allude to her not feeling adequate or strong enough. But she’s also driven by love for her family.

This being said, I think I already see how flawed her character is even if her goal is really fair, and why it seems like it’ll be the main source of challenges in the story : s!Ana is in a situation where she’s imposing this “ideal” of peace to everyone, and wants to keep the status quo. But she's not taking into consideration that the “status quo” is not ideal for everyone. And sometimes her ideal can directly conflict other’s, again s!Cherry who will really find happiness through freedom and not submission. 

She also wants to get rid of conflicts and make sure everyone reach a mutual agreement. But on hand, she’s fighting a losing battle, as she could never end up satisfying everyone, and will always end up feeling like a failure. On the other hand, I also feel like thinking too much about “solving” a conflict is ending up neglecting the reason why there was conflict in the first place, and preventing people from expressing and working out deeper issues and feelings who are the cause of the occuring tensions.  

It seems like there are a lot of communication issues in general, and people don’t get to share their struggles with others, outside of some really close relationships case, like s!Ryan and s!Miel seem to be. Again, I think this is one of the main element that will push the story forward.

I'll quickly mention s!Shade, what I find interesting is that as much as not involved they are for now with the god situation, it seem they're the most strong and loyal ally to s!Ana, along with s!Lumi. He's one of the less likely to be a threat to the peace as they're not really opposing anyone nor going through big struggles that s!Ana would have to deal with, he's mostly doing his things and minding his own business. And he seems to be in agreement with s!Ana's goals and acting to serve her best interests.

Villains

I think we're in the story where there isn't really "antagonistic" character, but rather character that have antagonistic “potential” for some arcs. We have the morally gray characters who only plays by their own rules, I’m thinking about s!Pancks and s!Bipeo, both really interesting to me.

More about s!Bipeo :

More about s!Pancks :

On a quick note, s!Pomme is already upset with s!Pancks actions when he killed the children, I think it may come up later.

Going into antagonistic potential, we have s!Jean and his hot tempered actions, but I don’t see him as a “long term” villain. Just putting here my previous analysis about s!Jean for more details :

There is s!Ryan who is in my opinion the main antagonist of this arc, she’s a slow paced villain as she’s carefully planning everything. I really love her character because her actions are driven in my opinion by inner scars. She feels really deeply human, embracing the “villainess” role in order to not be hurt anymore.

More about s!Jean and s!Ryan as villains here :

I suspect s!Miel, while not having hostile attention, being a potential chaos element bringing mayhem all around. And finally, I think s!Ana has the great potential of being both the hero/main character, both the villain in someone else’s story. 

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So yeah, that’s basically my assumptions, what I think will be the main conflicts between everyone, how the story will be driven, which main themes, etc !

[flower-sunflower-blog]

s!Ryan theory part 1/3 : Sun, keeper of the flame, breaker of the day

So, I’m finally getting on s!Ryan, what I’ve been figuring out so far, my theories and the different possibilities I could think of !

s!Ryan is a complex character that is giving me a hard time since a while, don’t get me wrong I really enjoy it - but still it’s hard xD Her story is conveyed through a multiformat storytelling and various hints spread around like pieces of puzzle. And everything is tying to a general story you need to figure out in order to connect everything.

That’s why it was so hard to share my thoughts about her, even small, compared to other characters. Because most of the time to understand my points you had to know about this one hint, connected to this other hint that made me think that, and could’ve explained this etc. My mind was a mess xD

BUT I tried to put everything into order, and through a 3 part theory, I'll try to go through everything as much as possible ! In order to give a better picture about her lore, the real mysteries about her, as well as a general context/timeline of event.

And yeah 3 parts, because s!Ryan is THAT much of a headache /lh

I hope we could be on a same page this way, so pay attention and follow me through this ! (if you're interested of course ;D)

This is the first part who will be discussing s!Ryan’s nature and powers, as well as her link with the sun.

The second part will be about her past, mostly based on her playlist "the origin story". And the last part will be about her connections with other people.

s!Ryan references and appearance

Let’s start with the “easiest” part. s!Ryan is looking like this : 

On her pinterest board, we can see references for her fairy-looking outfit. 

s!Ryan seems to like flowers/have a connection with it, she has a texture pack based on it. It looks like she’s a fairy, her connection with flowers and nature in general would make sense. 

Another interesting detail about her : she’s ginger. There are multiple references of ginger hair. 

I know this is shocking news for everyone xD BUT for realsies, keep in mind that s!Ryan has ginger hair on her pinterest board. More specifically, fully ginger-hair. It’s important for later.

Then something I noticed was various elements about fortune telling : crystal ball, tarot cards, palm reading. 

There is also this, that I found out to be "perfume". (Well at least that's what google told me)

It could be in line with fortune telling, it may even refer to something else unknown to us. But in general it just give up a certain vibe/aesthetic from her. 

s!Ryan and the sun

Omg guys, now we're getting onto the real deal, make sure to follow through everything xD

s!Ryan is heavily, heavily tied to the “sun”. There are so many hints about the sun, the light, the sunrays in general.

First when you look at her pinterest board you can notice them easily :

I also tend to think the sun has a divine essence in this world, i'll go more on that in a bit.

s!Ryan has a deep connection with the sun within herself. On twitter, she dropped 2 hints that highlighted it.

First there is this one :

Then there's this one : 

The description is a line coming from the song "The Moon will sing", and the next line is “I loved you like the sun”.

(note : it’s not the only time I’ll talk about these 2 hints, it will come up on later posts)

Finally, half of her hair became blonde at some point. Ryan said it was related to her lore, she didn't described it as something new, but as a part of her already existing but that she started to “show” little by little. And recently, her second eye started to glow.

Looking at it for a bit, I definitely think about the sun. We had hints and references, but it's almost like this eye and her blonde hair color is sort of physical mark of her connection with the sun.

The divine sun

So now it’s clear that s!Ryan is connected to the sun. But what kind of connection ? That’s where things get complicated for real. 

First of all, in order to have the slightest idea, we need to understand the nature of the sun to begin with. I said earlier that I think the sun has a divine essence, however I purposefully didn’t say that the sun was a god. Because nothing can be certain yet and that's even the whole question.

On a general note, I think the Shelter has a specific “theology” let's say, which was agreed upon everyone. Thus meaning that even if there is individual lore about member’s involvement with some gods, I think it’s still tied to this theology common to everyone, related to the specifics about the gods’ nature and everything, that is still unknown to us. 

Going back to the sun, what makes the question complicated and why.

We had confirmation that there are “gods” in plural. At one point s!Artea and s!Forest were discussing gods while the sun was up, and when they criticized them a lightning stroke on them. 

That means there were gods above them when the sun was up, and after all since we had the confirmation that there was a “moon entity”, why not a “sun entity” ?

However though, we have no certainty that was coming from the sun itself, it could always have been another god while the sun was up.

Then at another point, s!Cherry said that the sun was too bright and hurted her eyes, which s!Ryan found suspicious.

It really looked similar to when s!Artea was saying that the “moon” is “watching them”, not to mention that s!Cherry is particularly hostile to the gods. 

But the sun could also be a concept more abstract, holding a great power over everything and be an incarnation of a divine essence, while not being a “sentient” being. 

And even if the sun is a god, or at least related to a specific god, we know there is multiple gods.

Some of them are qualified as “dramatic” and “petty” by s!Cherry. However, there is no confirmation that all the gods and deities of this place are acting the same, and that the sun god is “among” the gods s!Cherry called petty.

On a general note, that's the main challenge about having multiple gods : we have no certainty all deities works the same, share a common nature, are on a similar scale etc

Not to mention that if you listen to s!Ryan playlist, there is a recurring theme about monotheistic religion : “hell”, “heaven”, “god", “devil” etc. Another reason to think the sun could possibly work on different rules. The sun may refer mainly to the "holiness" (you'll see I'll have the occasion to get on that later ^^).

But it’s also possible that the “sun entity” is indeed a sentient being with not-so-great morals too. That's also an interesting point to explore, but not on this post yet !

In conclusion, there is a whole lot of possibilities, and while we have some hints, there isn't much yet to tend to one more than another.

That's what you have to understand, and the reason why it makes it so challenging to theorise on.

But

I think there is definitely a form of cult around the sun, whether the sun is indeed a deity or an abstract/symbolic divine concept.

There is this picture that comes from s!Void’s board 

It makes me think that the cult with the sun tie to the general theology of Shelter.

 

s!Ryan’s powers and divinity

So you know now why the sun's nature is a complicated question. But so is s!Ryan’s, oh so is s!Ryan's.

For starters, Ryan confirmed her character isn't human neither an elf. I tend to think s!Ryan is a fairy, however it doesn’t end here.

Beyond the "specie's name", there is a question of "technicality". If s!Ryan is indeed a fairy, what does being a “fairy” in this world means exactly? After all, s!Cherry was also hinted to be a fairy, would it make them related in one way or another ? 

And since s!Cherry was hinted to be directly from the Shelter, would it also be the case for s!Ryan ? Are all the fairies related to the Shelter and magic tree in general ? That's also something that needs to be uncovered.

Going back to s!Ryan, her being a “fairy like” creature would be in line with the magic elements. She said her magic powers were lightning, light and fire-like elements.

But there's likely even more to it. At one point s!Ryan said “did they forget who I am, do they know the power that I have ?” hinting that her “true nature” is really powerful and that she didn't reach her full capacity yet :

Not to mention she said she “knows people with great power” while looking at the tree.

The tree, magic gods, you know xD

At one point, when s!Artea was shocked s!Ryan could fly, and asked how it was possible, she just answered she was “god’s favorite”. What could it mean ?

And now tying everything with s!Ryan's connection with the sun : s!Ryan is often directly compared to the sun. When we look at it, her powers (light, fire, lightning) seems related to the sun.

She's hinting having a great power, that she's starting to show her "true nature" through her current appearance. That when she started having half blonde hair, and recently had a glowing eye, who made me think of a physical mark of her connection with the sun.

Finally we have this coming from her board :

"Sun, keeper of flame, Breaker of day, I gave you my sword, my heart and my faith"

I think s!Ryan is holding her current powers from the sun, a kind of power that probably reaches a divine level.

But how comes ? What kind of link does s!Ryan have with divinity ?

That’s where there are multiple options possible, and we’ll go from the highest degree to lower degree : 

She could be the sun entity herself, thus a goddess. Maybe her having her “powers” coming from the sun means that she draws power from this divine essence, she “incarnate” its power. 

She could be related to the gods, either fully or partially. Maybe directly related to the sun deity, or to another deity while she would still worship the sun, no matter its nature. 

She could have made a “contact” with the deities which allowed her to “reach” this state and power, thus meaning her divine side recent. It could be either the sun deity, who would be an entity of its own in this case, either another kind of deity able to grant her powers from the sun.

She could not be divine, and her power would only come from what “gods” granted her. The subtle difference the previous case is that, while having divine powers, its not fully "hers" and the gods could take it back from her any time.

And among all those options, there may be even more I didn't think of yet. Again, there is so much possibilities.

There is various possibilities about the sun's real nature, as well as various possibilities about s!Ryan's. So figuring out s!Ryan's nature in parallel with her connection with the sun leaves us with soooo many option.

(When it comes to theorising, I think something important is avoiding to jump on the "obvious" conclusions, and instead try to think of all the possible interpretations possible :D)

There is one last thing I need to cover up :

The Ryans

It all started in the beginning of the Shelter. Ryan was turning people into clones on herself, chasing people around to submit them and "convert" them to the "Ryans cult"

And IF you don't believe me yet when I say that in this story, genuinely EVERYTHING can be lore, that should definitely proves you otherwise xD

Because at first, I didn't think it could be lore either, I thought it was just silly goofy fun. But then I discovered this :

Not only that, during one of s!Ryan lore stream, she referred to the Ryans again.

"The Ryans will attack, the Ryans will get them".

There is clearly something to uncover about the "Ryans" and what they truly are, and how it could possibly connects to s!Ryan's nature.

Changing who I was...

So ! We kinda covered everything about s!Ryan's powers, the hints and specifics, the mysteries and all the possible theories about her true nature. Well, "all the possible theories" not exactly yet :D

I talked about how s!Ryan could be a non divine fairy, or be divine through various degrees. But between a mere non divine and a divine being, there is one last option I didn't cover yet, an option in between. An option that I purposefully left at the end because it has interesting implications.

But before everything, there is some context to place. From now one, we'll try slowly but surely to introduce a timeline of event. The chronology from past s!Ryan, to s!Ryan coming from the tree until current s!Ryan.

There is something I wanted to bring your attention on. We know that s!Ryan has this sort of connection with the sun and hold her power from it. But since when ?

The first hint was posted before the stream where s!Ryan revealed her power, that she could fly. And if she had her half-blonde her since the trial, it's also where she revealed it was part of her lore.

And again, she did not described it as something "new" that appeared, but something already existing in her that she was "showing".

There is something to know about the description of her tweets : these are lyrics from the song "If I killed someone for you". Moreover, it's a song she has in her playlist ! And here, let me put you the full verse of the song :

You have to understand that The one I killed is me Changing what I was For what you wanted me to be I followed your direction Did everything you asked I hope that makes you happy 'Cause there's just no turning back

My interpretation is that, the power she has now, she didn't have it before, it's "recent". She had to do something in order to, there is something she had to "change".

But what was it ? And who is this "you" she may be referring to ? Again, there is a lot of possibilities. My main goal is to showcase everything and let you guys have your own prefered interpretation afterward :D

I said earlier that I think that her blonde hair, as well as her eye since recently, is a physical mark of her connection with the sun/power she holds from the "sun".

About her hair ! Do you remember how I said at the beginning that s!Ryan has ginger hair on her pinterest board ? And that it was something important ?

Here we are now : there is only ginger hair on her board, there isn’t ginger-blonde hair.

And just in case, I looked it up, and there are reference pictures for ginger-blonde hair on pinterest. Ryan could have put a reference for this, but she didn't. Why ?

Maybe she didn't think about it, or just didn't want to for no particular reason. But I have a possible interpretation that it was a purpose, and that there is actually a reason why.

I think the board focuses either on non temporal/general elements (reference outfits, fortune telling elements, powers etc), either element specifically from the past.

My theory :

Past s!Ryan= ginger --> Current s!Ryan= ginger-blonde

And having that in mind, it may show us that in the past, s!Ryan didn't have these hair, thus possibly meaning she didn't have powers from the sun at that time as she does right now.

But since when she had these power from the sun ? Again, s!Ryan said she was showing something "existing" in her through her hair, not something new.

But "existing" since when ?

Nothing is sure. Because right now, I'm only talking about the powers she has "now", that she hinted to go through a "change" to reach.

Maybe she didn't have powers at all before this "change" ? Maybe she had powers before but became more powerful ? Maybe she always had access to these power but decide now to use it ? (After all, at one point s!Ryan mention "my potential, what I possibly could be")

But that's not all I have to say. Because there is actually something I ended up being certain of.

There is at least one key event when we can be sure she "at the very least" hold these powers since then.

It's the "change" she's talking about.

And what is it ?

Her death

This hint mention a "slumber" that she woke up from. I saw it as a glince of the moment when she was brought in the Shelter by the tree. But the important part is that she "woke up" in general and what it actually mean :

s!Ryan died and was ressurected.

Let me put you again the lyrics from the song "If I killed someone for you"

You have to understand that The one I killed is me Changing what I was For what you wanted me to be

So, there is 2 thing to add to this :

I was certain that s!Ryan "death" was in the metaphorical sense"of "killing her old self", "changing" who she was before. And then I evoked the possibility that it was also in the litteral sense. But now I'm *convinced* it is ALSO in the litteral sense. And I'll have the occasion to tell you more about it later.

Past s!Ryan (ginger hair)

⬇️

s!Ryan's death ("change")

⬇️

Current s!Ryan (ginger-blonde hair)

Even tho I think s!Ryan's "death" is litteral, I think that the most impactful aspect is still the fact that her death was "metaphorical". In fact, this is for me the all core of s!Ryan's character, and something that allow us to understand more her current personnality.

The Saint

So ! I think s!Ryan holding the current power she has is something recent that we can date at least since her death. But what about her connection with the sun in general ?

I think s!Ryan always had this connection with the sun. And if it's not in a magical way, it is at a very least in the metaphorical way.

And I finally get into the possibility I was talking earlier, the possibility about s!Ryan being something "in between" a divine and a non divine being :

This are hints about the sun, again. But these one are really particular in the "aesthetic", it’s giving up a symbolic about “saint” and “holiness”.

You know how I said that there is a cult around the sun’s deity ? Maybe s!Ryan would have been part of it, and even more ?

This is the last option, something that I think is similar to s!Ana : the fact that s!Ryan would be a priestess of the sun, a “saint” in it's cult, even an angel ?

She wouldn’t be a god, but would be above the mere “non divine” beings.

-> That’s where getting it to tie to a “general theology” would make a change, because it would allow us to figure out the different role anybody could occupy in this.

The gold element is something common to s!Ana's board. And it would explain this quote !

Her being a “saint” would have allowed her to reach a deeper connection with the sun, and would explain why her nature is so tied to it.

One last minute element I could think of : You know how s!Ryan call s!Pomme "sister Pomme" ? Well, it also happen that s!Pomme is hinting to be an angel/saint, and related to "monotheistic" element like "heaven" just like s!Ryan. It may be something relevent ?

It wouldn't mean there are sisters in the "litteral" since, but it would be a hint to the fact that they share a similar nature ?

And on a /meta note, I know there is a context to the "sister Pomme" nickname. But Lumi and Ryan could've talk about it behind the scenes and be like "oh yeah let's make it fit with the lore". It would fit both of their way of storytelling xD

But if she was indeed a prietress/saint/angel/you get me, was it from her own will ? Of from birth ? Does she still consider herself this way ?

I also said earlier that s!Ryan has a connection with the sun within herself. But maybe this connection is to take metaphorically, as an allegory ?

There could be a symbolic about her being similar to the sun, "like the sun". This idea of being "holy", being a sunshine angel.

And we're finally getting to it. The reason why I wanted to develop this point at the end of the post, the one implication I ended up being certain about past s!Ryan :

s!Ryan was a saint before.

And whether or not she was a saint in the literal sense, I mean that I'm pretty certain she was metaphorically a saint, an incarnation of a perfect girl who was acting like a beacon of light for people around her.

But then she died, she "killed" her old self and she changed, going from a saint to a devil.

And this will be for part 2 !

Thanks for your attention :D

[flower-sunflower-blog]

s!Ryan theory part 2/3 : I was tame, I was gentle 'til the circus life made me mean

TW : depression, self hate, psychological abuse, suic*de (if you’re uncomfortable with these topics, I advise you to go through it carefuly ❤️)

So ! I couldn't WAIT to finally talk about the origin story ! It was my main reference to interpret s!Ryan's past/backstory and current psychology. And I so deeply wanted to share it !

I'm not necessarely good when it come to playlists for a bunch reasons xD But to explain you a bit, the way I went with it was that I was paying attention to recurring themes/ideas from one song to another. And then tried to connect everything to each other, other hints etc (for the fyi, I went over it like 6 times, no exageration xD)

I think I figured out a good part of the story conveyed by this playlist. I won't get into all of it in this post tho, there is an important part of the story that I save for the last post.

Each time I'll try to show my point with exemples and everything. Keep in mind that this is just my theories tho, that nothing is sure because I could still be mistaken at some moments !

⚠️ Before everything ⚠️

This post will be a bit different as I'll get a lot into s!Ryan's psychology, her feelings and experiences. And you'll see that part of what s!Ryan went through is beyond the context of magic gods.

It echoes to real feelings, real life experiences, real life topics that I'll get into as well. So again, if you're unconfortable with this, I advise you to read through it carefully.

But this is something I'm really excited about, as it allow us to see how complex and real s!Ryan actually is.

"Family"

There are 2 songs specifically related to family, they're even at the begining of the playlist : “family jewels” and “family line”.

I’ve been wondering if s!Ryan's family could be from royalty. 

Firstly, it’s just a detail but, there is the head picture of the board. The "setting" seems to be in a kind of royal/aristocratic home.

And at one point, Ryan used a quote from the sleeping beauty. I'll give the context later, but here is the full quote :

 “In a far away land, long ago, lived a king and his fair queen. Many years had they longed for a child and finally their wish was granted. A daughter was born, and they called her Aurora. Yes, they named her after the dawn for she filled their lives with sunshine. ”

It is referring to the parents as the king and the queen, thus making s!Ryan a sort of princess ? And then obviously, there is the whole question of finding a way to tie everything in the context of the lore of the Shelter.

As often, a lot of possibilities. If there was a cult around the sun or some deities, maybe s!Ryan's family were important people in it ? Maybe there were gods ? Maybe they were from a high ranked species ? Maybe s!Ryan is a saint/prietress/angel from birth ? It's really intriguing.

I definitely think tho that s!Ryan grew up in a “prestigious” environment.

“I can't break the cycle, am I just a fool? [...] Pass it down from kid to kid, the chain will never end. 'Less I decide to go to it, will I see the end?” (Family jewels)

I think it could be an allusion of a sort of prestigious lineage. Family from nobelty have in heart to "maintain" statues and infuence through generations.

It also seems to refer to a sort of generational trauma, a cycle that they abide too but that "chained" the members. A way of living that no one questionned or broke ?

And that's where everything start in s!Ryan's story, from her family and the way they treated her.

And it was bad, she had it hard, the songs are pretty self explanatory for this :  

“Oh, all that I did to try to undo it. All of my pain and all your excuses. I was a kid but I wasn't clueless - someone who loves you wouldn't do this" "Might share a face and share a last name, but - We are not the same” (Family line) “Ooh, don't you find it strange?. Only thing we share is one last name” (Family jewels)

It seems that s!Ryan didn't have a lot in common with her family, that she didn't get along with them. But most of all, she was deeply hurt by them, by their actions.

For me s!Ryan's family was definitely toxic, maybe even psychologically abusive to her ?

“Typical of me to put us all to shame” “Oh, you think I'm unfit. Little did you know that I was cut for it. No glass slipper will ever fit” (Family line)

It seems with these lines that they were putting high expectations for her, that she was "unfit" to them.

“Scattered 'cross my family line. I'm so good at telling lies. That came from my mother's side” (Family line)

I also wanted to bring your attention on that, the idea of "lies", "fakeness" in general, being something her family teached her. I'll get more on that later.

“Family said that I decided to live a loveless life. Is it my fault we stay divided? 'Cause I got too much pride” (Family jewels) “I watch the fathers with their little girls. And wonder what I did to deserve this. How could you hurt a little kid? I can't forget, I can't forgive you 'cause now I'm scared that everyone I love will leave me” (Family line)

In these lyrics, there is the idea that the child is wondering if they're the problem in this situation ? If they've done something wrong, if it's their fault that things are the way they are ?

-> And that's sadly typical in this kind of situation.

Because family is supposed to be a safe place, the people who loves you and care for you unconditionnaly. But when your family is not this safe place, not caring, not loving, you start wondering if maybe you're the problem ? If there is something wrong with you that makes you undeserving of their love ? Underserving of love in general ?

That's the second idea, a direct consequence of that : s!Ryan's family, with the way they acted with her, made her feel like she was underserving of love.

It mess up really early on your self value, and your relationships with other people. All because the one persons who were supposed to be trustworthy, safe, make you feel valuable and loved, didn't.

I think that there is an important theme of "love" around s!Ryan, in the core of her character, especially about the way she's able or not to feel "love" for other people.

s!Ryan’s “lover(s)”

Again, going onto recurring theme, I think there is someone s!Ryan was in a relationship with at that time, maybe even “engaged” to. Maybe multiple people ?

Either way, a lot of the songs refer to romantic relationships that were toxic, where the partner was straight up bad.

There is also the possibility that s!Ryan was “pressured” by her family to get with them, even forcefully engaged. 

“They sent me away to find them a fortune. A chest filled with diamonds and gold” (Control)

(On another note, in a lot of songs there is mentions of "jewels", especially the fact that s!Ryan is compared to jewels. Maybe it echoes how she was considered ? A kind of "pretty object" ?)

“If our love died, would that be the worst thing? For somebody I thought was my saviour. You sure make me do a whole lot of labour” (labour)

The song "labour" is really interesting, about the reality of heterosexual relationships for women. I was wondering from this line if s!Ryan saw this situation as something positive at first ? Someone who would "save her" ?

But then, a lot of the songs express how badly she was treated :

“I never trust a narcissist. But they love me [...] ‘Cause for every lie I tell them. They tell me three” (l did something bad) “I don't like your little games. Don't like your tilted stage. The role you made me play of the fool. No, I don't like you” “I don't like your kingdom keys. They once belonged to me. You asked me for a place to sleep. Locked me out and threw a feast (what?)” (Look what you made me do) “… You caged me and then you called me crazy” 'Cause you lured me. And you hurt me And you taught me" (Who's afraid of little old me ?) “Who do you think you are? Runnin' 'round leaving scars. Collecting your jar of hearts. Tearing love apart” (jar of heart) 

(And there is also the whole song “Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve” that I recommend you to check out, it's really impactful.)

I think that the relationships she had made her feel worse, value herself even worse. The other person is described as a "narcissist". It seems like they were belittling her, gaslighting her, maybe even "toying" with her feelings ?

-> Again, it's often a recurring pattern : when your family set your self value so low, you tend to get with people that doesn't value you.

Before moving on the next point, just so you know, a lot of songs refer to another kind of relationship she had, and in this case, it was more complicated. But I'll leave this for the last post.

The sunshine

So, I said i'll go later on this hint and the quote from "the sleeping beauty", here we are :

I was able to find out that it was a quote from the sleeping beauty, I'll put it again :

"A daughter was born, and they called her Aurora. Yes, they named her after the dawn for she filled their lives with sunshine”.

Maybe it was how her family and social circle in general perceived her ? Or maybe, how they expected her to be ?

Then you have all the hints I’ve shown about the idea of s!Ryan being a saint, being “holy” even compared to the sun.

It may tie to the lore about deities, and she could be a "litteral" saint. But what's certain and important here for me is the idea of her "acting" like a saint.

A lot of the songs refers to a “past self” who was nice and clean.

“I wanna be an idle teen, I wish I hadn't been so clean” (teen idle) "Angel, " he calls me”, "You're so pure, " he says” (Fruits) “I was tame, I was gentle” (Who’s afraid of lil old me)

I think at one point, s!Ryan was acting like a saint, like a beacon of sunshine for people around her. She was making other people around her happy.

But she was not happy herself.

A lot of the song expressed how much s!Ryan was in a bad mental state at that time : low self esteem, tired, hating herself, feeling messed up on this inside, depressed, and even suicidal

“And I couldn't stand the person inside me. I turned all the mirrors around” "And I tried to hold these secrets inside me. My mind's like a deadly disease" “These voices won't leave me alone. Well, my heart is gold and my hands are cold” (Control) “Are you insane like me? Been in pain like me?” (Gasoline) “There's rotten things left in me. Injected by society. No one here but me to judge me” (VOID) “Feeling super, super, super suicidal” “The wasted years, the wasted youth. The pretty lies, the ugly truth” (Teen idle)

What that inspire me is the idea of someone acting perfect for people while sacrificing their own well being in the process.

"Angel, " he calls me. Does he know that I'm falling from a precipice that I tripped off long ago?” (fruits)"

I really find this line impactful, and really meaningful for "what's coming next". How the fact that her being described as an angel, as "pure" wasn't something positive. Because people loved her when she was feeling at her worse.

For me, there is this whole idea of people expecting you to act "perfect" all the time. They end up not loving the "real" you, rather a "perfect" version of you that benefit them. And they don't really care about how much you suffer from it.

Social pressure

This part will kinda regroup everything I said until now, and add more to it. It's about the whole environnement, what I call the "social pressure".

“Do you tear yourself apart to entertain like me? [...] Saying that you shouldn't waste your pretty face like me?”  “You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being. With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self-esteem, so you run on gasoline” (Gasoline) "The pretty lies, the ugly truth” (Teen idle)

There is a lot this idea of acting "fake" in front of people. And as I said earlier, about how her "family" is fake and that she gets it from them.

Maybe it would make sense, again, in the context of royalty and high-ranked people, where it's a constant game of appearances and you have to abide through arbitrary social standards.

But that's also accurate to society as a whole, about social conventions, about putting up a mask to "fit in" and being otracise if you don't.

“There's rotten things left in me. Injected by society. No one here but me to judge me” (VOID)

Then we come to social standard, sexism and gender roles. The way society consider women, the way they "pressure them" to act a certain way that devalue them. Through the songs, there is a criticism of this.

The idea of sexism, of s!Ryan's gender being the very cause of a lot of her problems, is really present :

“If we had a daughter, I'd watch and could not save her. The emotional torture, from the head of your high table. She'd do what you taught her, she'd meet the same cruel fate” "All day, every day, therapist, mother, maid. Nymph then a virgin, nurse then a servant.” (labour) “When he stole my virtue [...] That I was born a daughter and not a son. For if I'm going down” (fruits) "They're burning all the witches, even if you aren't one" (I did something bad)

Finally, from the board, there is this.

I think it alludes to the social pressure, the expectations, the look of others. And mostly, how it can really mess up someone.

And that's the "origin story", it all start there, from how badly s!Ryan was treated by her family, in her relationships, by society as a whole.

The devil

At one point, s!Ryan started having affinity with the “devil”.

The idea of religion, heaven and hell, god and devil, was really present. But what was the most present was the idea of siding with the devil. “Me and the devil” being the best representation of that. 

“And I said hello Satan, ah. I believe it is time to go. Me and the devil walkin' side by side [...] So my old evil spirit. Can Greyhound bus that ride” (me and the devil) “My love, are you the devil? I would worship you instead of him. I have no time for confession. For I'm too busy committing sins” “My love, you're something special. I've never met someone like you. You'd make me fall from heaven”  "Devil, " you call me. But seems to be enjoying. Oh! Oh, call me a devil. Oh, you call me a devil” (fruit)

In general, she embraced the “evil” path. It was the changing point for her.

“I'm meaner than my demons” “I'm well acquainted with villains that live in my head. They beg me to write them so they'll never die when I'm dead”. (Control) “If you'd never looked my way, I would've stayed on my knees. And I damn sure never would've danced with the devil” (Would've, Could've, Should've)

That's not all, going back to some moments of her lore :

And then going back to the hint board, there is this idea of a dark spirit in contact with her, "corrupting" her :

Figuring out what is the “devil” she’s talking about is kinda complex (for a change). 

It may be an abstract idea, but also a dark entity. It could even be someone in particular. It's kinda like the rest : entity ? god ? lover? symbol ? xD

You'd make me fall from heaven” "Devil, " you call me. But seems to be enjoying.

I see something kind of deep in the fact that she enjoyed being called "devil" and falling from heaven.

Because being a "saint" was the reason why she was suffering in the first place. And she didn't like herself.

I think she liked not being seen as perfect, that her "darkness" inside her was being perceived, understood.

And because she hated being a saint, she would rather become the complete opposite.

s!Ryan “death”

At one point, s!Ryan killed herself.

When I saw this as well as other hints, it made me think that s!Ryan could’ve died before being resurrected by the tree. It was just a suspicion of mine.

But now, I’m 100% sure that s!Ryan killed herself and came back to life. First this on her board :

And then this idea is like, omnipresent in the playlist :

“And the day has come where I have died, Only to find, I've come alive” (Teen idle) “You may bury my body. Down by the highway side” (Me and the devil) “Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time”  “I'm sorry, But the old Taylor can't come to the phone right now. Why? Oh, 'cause she's dead” (Look what you made me do) “If you wanted me dead, you should've just said. Nothing makes me feel more alive” (Who's afraid of little old me?) “You have to understand that the one I killed is me, changing what I was for what you wanted me to be” (If I killed someone for you)

And finally, the whole song “Achilles come down” is about a suicide attempt.

It seems to be coinciding with the whole "devil" allegeance I talked about earlier. I think the most important aspect is how she symbolically “killed” the one she was before.

It’s about how she killed the "saint" s!Ryan, the perfect and nice girl, who was depressed, felt unloved, was mistreated.

And she came back to life as the evil one.

I like how this picture can convey a symbolism of "phoenix". Symbolically, s!Ryan was killed and burned by the fire around her - family, lover(s), society - and then she was re-born through the "fire", a element of mayhem and destruction that she had control of.

Who is in control ?

I’m finally reaching one of the main and most recurring themes : having power and taking revenge on those who’ve done her wrong. 

She became manipulative :

“I never trust a narcissist. But they love me. So I play 'em like a violin. And I make it look oh so easy” “I never trust a playboy. But they love me. So I fly him all around the world. And I let them think they saved me” (I did something bad)

And she took her revenge over people who treated her badly before :

“If a man talks shit, then I owe him nothing. I don't regret it one bit, 'cause he had it coming" "They say I did something bad. But why's it feel so good? Most fun I ever had. And I'd do it over and over and over again if I could” (I did something bad) “But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time (nick of time) I got a list of names, and yours is in red, underlined [...] Ooh, look what you made me do”  “all I think about is karma" “I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me, I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams” (Look what you made me do) “Acting on your best behaviour. Turn your back on Mother Nature. Everybody wants to rule the world” (Everybody wants to rule the world) “… So I leap from the gallows and I levitate down your street. Crash the party like a record scratch as I scream. "Who's afraid of little old me?" I was tame, I was gentle 'til the circus life made me mean "Don't you worry, folks, we took out all her teeth" Who's afraid of little old me? Well, you should be… You should be” (Who's afraid of little old me ?) “And all the kids cried out, "Please stop, you're scaring me". I can't help this awful energy. Goddamn right, you should be scared of me. Who is in control?” (Control)

Then I'll be referencing the timeline I did in the previous post :

I hope it can make clear how the "change" s!Ryan went through isn't only about hair or magic, it's really psychological.

Current s!Ryan became the one who had power over everyone, and she became everyone's worst nightmare.

I miss who I used to be

There is this line which was really interesting to me.

“God rest my soul, I miss who I used to be. The tomb won't close, stained glass windows in my mind. I regret you all the time” (Would've, Could've, Should've)

What really got to me is how most of the songs expressed that s!Ryan didn't like the one she was before, preferred the one she's now : the one having power, being ambitious, selfish, in control.

But in this one, it is said that she "miss" the one she was before ? It feels so real actually.

About how one's feelings aren't as simple as it seems, even if a lot of the songs express that s!Ryan changed her mindset, deep down she may be more conflicted.

And the second interesting aspect is a reminder about how s!Ryan herself wasn't the one who "killed" her previous self. Her "nice self" was killed by the suffering she went through, by what people put her through.

That going through this change was her own way to put an ending to it.

I'll put these lyrics again :

I was tame, I was gentle 'til the circus life made me mean "Don't you worry, folks, we took out all her teeth" Who's afraid of little old me? Well, you should be… You should be” (Who's afraid of little old me ?)

It's a reminder about how villains aren't born, they are made. s!Ryan made me go really emotional, because even tho she's acting like she's 100% confident in her new form, she's in her core the result of suffering from what she went through. From the consequences. From her feeling of loneliness.

Suming up

In conclusion, s!Ryan when she was young was someone who was nice, a "sunshine". She was lifting up to expectations that people had of her, she was “perfect” but it made her feel tired, depressed, having low self esteem. 

Her family was toxic and unloving, her “relationships” made her feel even worse. But at one point she had enough, she rose up in order to become the one in control. Going from someone sweet, to someone mean and dangerous, embracing the “bad role” and feeling better than ever. 

She “killed” herself both literally and metaphorically. That's her origin story, but....

What about current s!Ryan ?

I'll bring back your attention on s!Ryan current lore, about what she actually said :

That’s why for me, her playlist was so important to understand her. You get why she only cares about herself, why she takes so at heart opposition against her, why she feels like she has no one. It all come from her past.

She seems to base a lot of her current relationships around manipulation, and also seems to have a hard time trusting people :

(about the sun)

s!Ryan for me is someone who’s life made her mean, and selfish. But she’s still carrying inside her all the pain that she felt, all the “rotten” and “broken” side of her.  

It seems like she has a hard time opening up to people, because she wasn't used to be loved, and that she may don't trust the fact that people actually love her ? That people CAN actually love her ?

Love

You know how I said at the beginning that "love" was for me the core of s!Ryan's character ?

It’s also why her way of “loving people” is so deeply interesting. Sure, she likes to be flirty, either to be silly, mess around, or manipulate a situation for her best interest. But what about how she genuinely feel ?

Does she loves some people ? Does she know how to love ? On one hand, she doesn't seems to "love" a lot of people, and she says that she only cares about herself. But on the other hand, we can't say that there isn't people she seems to be at least attached to in her own way ?

She seems to have a twisted way of feeling everything because she never felt loved herself, but it doesn't mean she can't feel at least a bit of affection some times. Again, it's not black and white, it feels really complex.

That's why her relationships are FASCINATING to me, they're often really complex because impacted by the fact that s!Ryan's way of seeing relationships, of loving, is twisted by her inner scars.

Her relationship with s!Void is so emotional to me, because s!Void is someone really nice, sweet, someone s!Ryan was never used to, who feels so different from her.

And her relationship with Miel seems also deeply complex, and really mysterious.

And this will be for part 3!

Thanks for your attention :D

[flower-sunflower-blog]

What s!Cherry did to the gods, and the true reason why they want her near the tree

What did s!Cherry that made the gods upset ? We don’t know yet, because we didn’t see it. Yeah, that’s the theory. 

We could have thought that we saw all the moments that explained why the gods were angry, but we didn’t. It wasn’t just because she insulted them - at least not only xD Or maybe it is, but even if it is, we didn’t see it happening. At this point, what s!Cherry did to them could’ve been literally anything, we don’t have clues. That’s where you have to follow my track, you need to have all the elements in mind to understand, and you’ll see what I mean and why I think this is important to know.

First, she appeared in a box far away from her house. Why was she this far away to begin with ? And in a box ?  She told the fruities she lost her waypoint and had to walk back home. But again, how did she find herself in this situation ?  But she quickly brushed off the topic, and at this point the fruities didn’t notice anything weird with the situation. On her way, she was distracted a lot, especially by flowers. Looking back at it, it’s like she didn’t really want to go deep down, at any occasion collecting flowers and looking at cute mobs was more interesting to her. At some moments she said she wanted to go home, especially when hostile mobs were around her. But she also said she FELT like she needed to go home, more on that later. 

But she found out where the waypoint of her home actually was. And when she did, she stopped, and she stayed really silent for a while. It was like she was having some kind of realization ? But she still moved forward soon after, and once she was very close, the weather started changing and a storm arose. What she said afterwards seemed to have provoked more thunder, the fact that this place wasn’t her home for instance. And once she insulted them, she got struck by lightning. But, keep it in mind, the storm was here JUST BECAUSE she was near the tree to begin with, before she did anything else. At that moment, she also said that she has been struck a lot recently. After she got angry with them and they struck her with lightning, they kinda “pressured” her to go “home” which was the tree. 

She describes the “magic” as “awful” near the tree. It was really clear that she doesn’t like this place, but didn't have a choice. She went on about how she hated the place, how she "didn’t want to call it her home” but when she made those statements, the gods got even more angry at her. After this event, a few incidents happened where the gods got angry, she got threatened etc. She told s!Ana she did “something” to upset them, and s!Lea told her "whatever you did, don't ever do it again". At this point I just assumed they referred to how she insulted the gods back then. Another interesting scene during the third gods occurrence : she told s!Ana she shouldn’t have built her home close to the tree. Ana replied she wasn’t sure the tree was the problem but s!Cherry said “yeah not so sure about that”. And once both of them arrived near the island, the storm started rising. And s!Cherry said "that's why I don't...really go here. I don't think they like me on this island"

Something was strange for me for a while, and seemed contradictory. First, it is implied that s!Cherry didn’t seem to have a problem being near the tree at first, since she built her house near it (because the tree has been there since the beginning, remember). It shows that her strong feelings about the tree didn't get in the way of being close to it at first. But after she pissed off the gods, it seemed like s!Cherry clearly didn’t want to go to the tree, but was pressured to. But at the same time, the gods were angry when s!Cherry was near tree, with how s!Cherry said “I don’t think they like me on this island”, “that’s why I don’t go here”. Why force her to go near the tree, and then get angry at her when she does it ? That’s where I had a realization piecing all the elements together : I really think the gods actually have more power and influence near the tree. And that’s the whole reason why they want her near the tree. 

So, let’s go back in time with all these elements in mind : 

- Far away from her home, in a the box

- Realizing what was her home in the middle of the way

- The thunder rising as soon as she stepped near the tree

- Pushing her to go near the tree when she didn’t want to

- Her saying she shouldn’t have made her house close to the tree

- The storm rising when she's near the tree again afterward

s!Cherry did something bad, something that really upsetted the gods, when she was near the tree/her house. Whatever this “something was” - it still could have been insults, it just means she did it sooner than we thought, or something else - it was probably the whole reason why she appeared in the box in the first place. She was far away, hidden, to avoid being punished by the gods. Because she probably knew the god won't have influence over her this far from the tree. But things didn’t go according to her plan.

When she woke up, she seemed kinda confused, the way she talked made it feel like she didn’t remember. Maybe she only half remembered ? Other option, she knew what was going on but wasn’t willing to admit what really happened to the fruities. But she still started walking her way home. But if everything I said is right, why tho ? This whole question could uncover a lot about the reality of the Shelter, why even getting far away from the gods couldn’t prevent her from falling under their authority ? When she stopped half way and stopped at the waypoint, she likely remembered - or just realized - what was awaiting her back there. But she still continued. Maybe the fact she was in a vulnerable position being far away, with hostile mobs and no one near who would rescue her, made her go back by herself. At these moments, she said she wanted to go home. But also said she FELT like she had to go home at other moments. That’s really where we can think of a driving force she just couldn’t escape, way beyond her. Or maybe it was the mix of both of these elements ?

And when she was near the tree, that’s probably where the god could punish her for what she did. So the reason why she storm arose immediatly at that moment, and everytime she went back here afterwards. They force her to go near the tree, because that’s where they can exercise their power onto her without being limited, and make her pay the consequences of her actions. s!Cherry really seems forcefully submitted to the gods, and this whole event proved that even going far away where they don’t have influence over her doesn’t work. But she also wants to live a peaceful life, so that’s why she eventually get an agreement with s!Ana to stop opposing them. Well, at least for now. Let me tell you this, I think this opposition that s!Cherry has with the gods will be a key element of the whole Shelter lore once they’ll get started.