Season 11, Episode 17: Red Meat
I saw a lot of this episode in clips, but there was a lot more I really liked in the full thing. :)
< Oh, my word, talk about a slap in the face of an opening! You watch Sam get shot, and then immediately find out this job was his idea. 🥺 Yeah, that hurt.
< I just really love the way Sam looks at Dean here. Trying to reassure him, even though he doesn't have any answers. Wise enough to know Dean needs to get out and stretch his legs, and think about something other than Cas and the situation they happen to be in, and solve a simpler problem.
<And of course Dean says 'yes'.
< Sam on the floor, shot, bleeding, in immense pain, and he's trying to tell Dean to help Corbin and Michelle... I love him so much.
< I just love this whole bit with Dean never stopping moving, never stopping doing what he needs to do to help both Sam and the hikers. He makes them wait long enough to fish the bullet out of Sam, but then gives Sam the bandage to start, and sets the hikers free. There's just something so... intensely capable about BOTH Sam and Dean, they're both so physically capable and strong, and that is so obvious in this episode and I love it. Sam trying to tape on the bandage with his shaking hands, but not asking for Dean's help because the hikers need him at the moment. Sam dragging himself to his feet when Dean's about to leave, because he knows Dean is torn, and Sam also knows he's in big trouble if one of those 'others' come back. Just everything about Sam being so freaking tough and strong and everything!
<But also Dean collecting branches to make a litter to carry Sam on, and getting so mad at that tree branch for catching on him, and that's when his intense calm slips, and he knows it, he knows how scared he is that Sam might not be okay. Ack, such a little detail, but so telling!
< Sam being so ready for them to leave him, knowing he'll slow them down because he can't really walk anymore, so sacrificial, I love him.
< It doesn't matter how many times he's seen it before, Dean gets the exact same look on his face when he loses Sam. I just... can't. 😭
< The way Dean has to force himself to leave, to walk out that door and close it behind him. Fighting the cop just to try to go back to his brother's dead body (as far as he knows).
< Sam waking up right before Dean's about to do his overdose had me internally screaming at Dean, fantastic timing.
<Also the overlay of Sam and Dean falling at the same time was too good.
< Sam calling "Dean!" AS THE FIRST THING HE SAYS, I CAN'T
< Just something horrible and beautiful about Sam fighting to live at the exact same time as Dean is fighting to taste death so he can bargin for Sam's life...
< I CAN'T GIF THE MOMENT BUT WHEN BILLIE SAYS "SAM'S NOT DEAD" AND DEAN'S FACE CHANGES FROM THE PLEADING AND THE PAIN TO AN ANGRY KIND OF HOPE
< AND YOU KNOW THAT DEAN KNOWING SAM WAS ALIVE WAS EXACTLY WHY HE WAS ABLE TO COME BACK BECAUSE HE HAD A REASON TO KEEP LIVING
< THE WAY DEAN ALMOST COLLAPSES WITH RELIEF WHEN HE HEARS SAM'S VOICE ON THE PHONE
< Sam saving Dean's hide with a bullet hole in him, and having lost how much blood? And Dean greets him with, "Took you long enough!" because that's what brother's do.
< Also seriously, the way he collapses in the hallway like a newborn foal, Sam is ALL LEGS.
<Jared is SO GOOD at acting in pain?!?!
< "I watched the man I love die. There's no normal after that." DEAN'S FACE. Excuse me, while I go scream into a pillow. I need to write that it's own post, because DEAN HAS SEEN THE MAN HE LOVES BEST AND DEAREST IN THE WHOLE WORLD DIE MORE THAN ONCE AND HE... has never known normal, has he?
< Look at his eyes. Sam KNOWS. "When you thought I was dead. What did you do?" He KNOWS Dean did something stupid, something crazy, something Dean doesn't want to admit to, but he lets his big brother get away with it, he lets it go. "I knew you weren't dead." And Sam laughs, because he knows Dean's lying through his teeth, lying to spare Sam the truth, but he loves his brother for it even now, and he lets it go. "I knew," Dean says, and they both pretend to believe him because it's easier.
