 ( @saintburned / cont. )
    she never gets used to it. no matter how many cases she sees --- and she sees more than the rest of the team, the way that she is constantly drowning in a sea of potential cases, each one screaming at her to choose it to present --- she never gets used to the horror of it all. the things that people can do to one another, the way that they can twist what should be a happy life into something dark and distorted, and not happy at all.
    but, more to the point, jj doesn’t think she wants to get used to it. every victim deserves the same amount of sympathy and care as the previous ones, and not to be looked at by agents who are jaded and weary. it hurts, sometimes, sure. but jj would rather feel too much than feel nothing at all. she would much rather care. it’s just...horrifying, sometimes. what people can do.Â
    she thinks she’s seen it all, and then there’s something like this, and it’s new, all over again.
    ❝ thoughtlessness, carelessness---it’s not the same as making a choice to torture someone. it’s not even a choice, for a lot of them. it’s a compulsion. ❞ she’s no saint; she’s hurt people too. sometimes she’d really like to punch an unsub, or an old-fashioned misogynistic rural cop. but doing something like this is...unimaginable. ❝ and i think that’s...scarier than it being a choice. ❞
    there is a lot of evil, in the world. jj feels as though it’s constantly touching her, something she can’t wash off. but her team is good, law enforcement and prosecutors and ordinary people are good, and she’s got to hold onto that. hasn’t she?
    ❝ cheesy fries? ❞ a smile, here; her gaze turns away from the board, and up to yoni. ❝ that’s your answer to dealing with this? ❞
