݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ summary: [angst] The ocean is cruel and merciless. Sometimes, the biggest hurdles the Straw Hats face isn't a monster or larger-than-life pirate, sometimes, it's just the ruthless nature of the sea.
݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ warnings: Dead!Reader
݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ AN: it is sad time :3 time for sad :3 it's a bit short by i might do a part 2, if it compels me???? who's to say [edit: GUESS WHO GOT COMPELLED]
[Overboard pt. 1] <-----you are here!
[Overboard pt. 2]
[Overboard pt. 3]
[Overboard pt. 4]
[Overboard pt. 5]
[Overboard pt. 6]
˚ ✦ . . ˚ . . ✦ ˚ . ★⋆.
Wind slashed in your face and rain pelted against your skin like icy bullets. You could barely hear Nami's shouting to adjust the sails over the intense storm that whistled through the air around you. Loud cracks of thunder echoed against your eardrums, and you could barely see in the torrential on-pour of rain. Usopp and Sanji both were trying to control the rudder, a one man job turned two as the waves battered the Going Merry like it was a leaf blowing in the wind. Luffy was helping you control the sails, while Zoro ran around the ship tying down anything worth keeping, throwing a tarp and covering the tangerine trees to keep them safe against the onslaught of the storm.
Nami directed you all like a chorus, her hoarse voice barely audible over the pelting winds and rain, the cracks of thunder rumbling in the dark stormy clouds. You were finishing the last knot when Luffy waved his hand in front of your face. He shouted something and pointed off to where Zoro was trying to tie a tarp around the tangerine trees, and you nodded and waved him off as he sprung into action. The ship lurched and bobbed through the massive waves, rising and falling, with you sliding around with it. Gripping the coarse rope tightly, you just manage to finish tying it up as the ship tilts an almost entirely sideways. The wind whips across your face as you struggle to regain your balance, your feet sliding across the deck.
You hear Nami's voice shouting something unintelligible before she makes her way inside, but you're too preoccupied with trying to find a hold somewhere as you try to follow her lead. It all happens too fast—the rain falling in sheets on deck, the harsh waves rocking the boat terribly, and suddenly, you slip.
Your only mercy is a quick fall. Your head hits the railing as the ocean welcomes your body. You don't even remember the feeling of submerging into the open waters.
Nami clamors into the inner chamber, panting and just barely managing to shut the door behind her as Sanji helps her in with a charming smile. "Is that everyone?" she asks, turning around and seeing Zoro, somehow already asleep leaning against the wall, Luffy stuffing his face with snacks Sanji laid out, and Usopp glued to the window watching the chaos unfold outside with trembling knees.
Sanji strides over to smack Luffy's head, "Those snacks are for everyone you know, not just you!" he barks, before looking around. "Wait a minute," an icy chill grips his heart, "Where's Y/N?" his head spins so fast you'd think it'd snap, "Wasn't she already inside? After Luffy went to help Zoro?"
"Oh yeah, I told her to go inside and pointed!" Luffy says through a garbled mouth of food.
Sanji pays him no mind as he shoves his way through the kitchen—
"I'm sure she's here!" Usopp's voice follows him.
Sanji rushes through the hallway and the cabin and the bathroom, overhearing Nami giving orders to keep watch out the windows as she wakes Zoro to go back out on deck to see if you were still out there.
His heart is pounding, the icy chill growing into a freeze as the hair on the back of his neck stands up. He finishes searching through the inner cabins—double, no triple checking for any trace of you. Sanji can feel his heart in his throat as he storms back into the kitchen right as Zoro steps back in, closing the door behind him. Just him, only him, no sign of you yet.
Zoro shakes his head.
Sanji lunges at him. and it takes Luffy wrapping his arms around him several times to hold him back. "Did you even search for her or did you just take a look around? She could be anywhere!" he growls at Zoro.
"You think you're the only one who cares for her?! We all do!" Zoro shouts back. "You think I wouldn't search every inch of this ship for her? For any of you? We're family!"
"You can't stop me from going out there!" Sanji yells, breaking loose from Luffy's grip. He turns to his captain, and for once, Luffy isn't smiling.
"We'll all search for her again." Luffy says. He nods at Nami and Usopp, "Search inside again. Keep an eye on the storm and at the windows. No one else goes missing."
Outside, the storm rages on—cold and merciless. The rain and winds tilt the ship every which way, sending the crew spiraling as they slide across the deck, barely managing to hold on. Luffy uses his powers to whip across the deck, searching high and low. Zoro pulls himself along the railing, eyes clamoring for any sign of you on board.
Sanji searched like a man crazed, no rhyme or reason to be found as he focused on his sole mission—to find you. With each passing breath, each torturous second, the fear in his heart climbed higher and higher, choking him. Winds sliced at his cheek, as the rains drenched his suit. Thunder rumbled overhead and the brief cracks of lightning were his only guides. He couldn't tell how much time had passed. How long he would search the ship over and over while she rocked against the merciless waves. Salt water sprayed in his mouth with each wave, seemingly higher than the last, as it washed across the wooden slates of the deck.
Sanji wouldn't stop. Couldn't stop. Stopping meant facing reality, facing truth he did not want to know and would never accept. It wasn't until Luffy's arms forcibly wrapped themselves multiple times around him, with Zoro at his side, did Sanji let his knees collapse beneath him.
The winds swallowed his screams as they ripped from his throat. His cries of anguish lay at the altar of the storm, the cruel relentless nature of the Grand Line. The storm matches him beat for beat, walls of rain swallowing his screams of agony, of anger.
It is only when Luffy's arms slowly start pulling him back, Zoro helping him stand, does Sanji numbly follow into the safety of the cabin. Nami and Usopp don't say a word as the three of them step over the threshold, heads hanging low. An eerie silence follows them, the whistling of the wind echoing from outside as the thundering rain pounds against the windows.
Sanji's eyes glaze over, the icy tremors spreading their shards across his chest, binding tightly against his heart. He can barely remember slumping against the wall and sliding down, and the rest of the crew follows suit, sitting together in silence as the storm cruelly mocks them from outside. As the boat rocks, Sanji's eyes keep twitching over to the bedroom door, waiting, daring you to step into the galley, asking why everyone's so glum.
Hours ago. Just a few hours ago, before the storm hit. You were sitting on the counter, idly chatting about the new book you had picked up at the last island, while he prepped for lunch. His eyes shoot over to your abandoned cup on the table, your tea's cold by now. You were here, you were here, you were here. Sanji's chest tightens and caves inwardly. Stray drops of rainwater drip from his hair down his spine, chilling him to his bones.
"The minute the storm calms," Luffy says, voice low and haunting, "we'll start searching for her."
Sanji flicks his eyes upwards—Luffy was holding your mug tenderly, thumb tracing idle circles against the handle.
The rest of the crew nods, no one having the stomach to voice the thought that plagued their minds—that it might be too late.
݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ summary: [angst] The ocean is cruel and merciless. Sometimes, the biggest hurdles the Straw Hats face isn't a monster or larger-than-life pirate, sometimes, it's just the ruthless nature of the sea.
݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ warnings: [Dead Dove DO NOT EAT] Dead!Reader / grief / descriptions of storms / descriptions of smoking /
݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ AN: is Sanji delirious? who's to say? w h o ' s to say? i got soooooo many comments asking me to continue this, so here you go! :3 it's a bit longer, i thought about splitting it into two sections buuuuut i decided to be nice and treat you all <3
[Overboard pt. 1]
[Overboard pt. 2]
[Overboard pt. 3] <----you are here!
[Overboard pt. 4]
[Overboard pt. 5]
[Overboard pt. 6]
˚ ✦ . . ˚ . . ✦ ˚ . ★⋆.
The night was eerily silent. Waters so calm, you would think the ship's at a standstill. Not even the cool night breeze dared to touch the ship. Stars twinkled above, dusty clouds sparse against the inky black sky. The moon, full and gleaming, cast white highlights against the small curls of the sea. The soft click of a lighter broke the silent tension, and the warm flame danced in the solitary moonlight.
Sanji took a long slow drag of his cigarette, the smokey haze hitting the back of his throat in a familiar burn. He slowly exhales, releasing the smoke into the air. The nicotine doesn't give the same head rush as it used to, but he goes through the motions anyway, letting himself get lost in thought as he stares across the open waters.
It's been close to three months by now.
Three long, arduous, torturous months.
Sanji still has to remember how to breath again each morning, how to put himself back together in a way that'll make Nami stop looking at him like he'll shatter at any moment. He has his good days, days where the weight settled in his chest is easier to work around. Where he can actually crack a smile at Luffy's jokes, Usopp's stories. And on those good days, it feels like there could exist a way for him to be human again, outside of his grief.
You were the first person that really welcomed him on the crew. That pushed him the way Luffy did at first, the one who sat with him and talked to him about dreams and convinced him to find the courage, the bravery, to follow his own path. And in that space, he followed his heart to you, and you to him. With you, it was always more than just flirtations and charms—the first time you replied with a witty retort and a wink of your own he knew he was a goner. The two of you just, clicked. Your warm energy helped everyone on the crew gel together, come together as more than a rag-tag group of pirates, but something closer to a family.
Luffy may have been the sun, but you were the moon and stars—still bright in your own way, giving them space to open up to you gradually. But to Sanji? You were every good thing in this world wrapped into one; your kindness, bravery, and loving heart outmatched by none.
Sanji took another deep drag from his cigarette, the amber light at the end dulling as time passed. His ocean eyes stared out across the gentle ocean, how many times had he cursed it? Ruthless force of nature, taking you from him, keeping you from your family in its cruel and unforgiving inky depths. There was no more pretending now, although none dared speak it, that you were well and truly gone. How heartless is that? A fierce pirate and fighter in your own regard, taken out in the blink of an eye in a storm. Lesser men have died that way, and you should've never been one of them.
What hits most is the silence. The ghost of you follows him around the ship, the absence of your laughter a bitter cold, frosted across every encounter and new adventure they partake in. You used to join him for an early cup of tea in the mornings—an early riser, someone who would enjoy the slow pace of the ship waking up. Now on most mornings he stares blankly into the two cups he mistakenly brought out again, his sleep addled brain playing cruel tricks on him.
With a final inhale, he reaches the end of his cigarette, letting the acidic nicotine wash over him. His senses were numbed, but not numb enough to not notice someone coming to join him on deck, leaning against the railing.
"What do you want, dumb moss-head?"
"Like you own the deck?" Zoro huffed in response.
Sanji couldn't find it in him to fight back. He just flipped the lid on the carton of cigarettes before finding solace in having one more, just one more, before trying to sleep again. Maybe if he stayed awake long enough, his body would knock him out in a peaceful, dreamless sleep.
Zoro's eyes flicked down to Sanji turning the cigarette over in his hands and sighed. "I thought you were over this."
Sanji stilled, hackles raising in the heat of anger—"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
"I gave you her journal. You can't keep doing this," Zoro bluntly responded, gesturing to Sanji.
"You're an asshole, and you're lucky that I don't want to wake the others, otherwise you'd get a foot in your face," Sanji turned to walk away, "I'm finding some other place on the deck to find peace. Don't follow."
Zoro groaned, "You're being an idiot—"
"An idiot for grieving?!" Sanji whirled around. "You're an idiot! I can see now that she truly meant nothing to you, if you think—"
Whatever Sanji was going to say was shortly interrupted with a swift punch to the jaw as Zoro clocked him. Sanji tumbled onto the deck, a bruise forming rapidly against his skin. He quickly rose to his feet, but Zoro was quicker and shoved him against the mast—"Don't you ever say that she meant nothing to me." His eyes held the intensity of a master swordsman, and for the first time, Sanji noticed the dark circles under Zoro's eyes. The slight gauntness in his face. The tension eased between them, as they recognized the grief reflected back at each other. Zoro stepped away and went back to leaning against the rail, starring into the waters.
"Don't talk as if she meant nothing to us, to me," Zoro began in a low voice. "Dammit, she was part of our crew, part of the family. If you think a second goes by that I'm not thinking about the fact that I should've been more careful on that night. Luffy damn near had to hold me back from the railing himself to keep from diving in, just to see if I could find her then."
Sanji stared in open disbelief. "I didn't know," his voice came out hoarse.
"Don't assume that just because I'm trying to hold myself together, that it means that I don't feel it every day like you," Zoro turns to stare at Sanji, "And it also gives me the right to tell you when you're being a dumbass. She wouldn't want you to wither away like this."
For the first time in weeks, Sanji felt the ache in his bones all over. It's as if the numbness ebbed away, and the full effects of not sleeping and eating properly caught up to him all at once. And instead of acknowledging any of those feelings, he sighs and goes to grab the loose cigarette which had fallen to floor when Zoro clocked him.
With a soft click from his lighter, he goes and joins Zoro against the rail. For a moment, no words are exchanged, none are needed. For as much shit as they give each other, there's a lingering trust forged bond between the pair. Sanji knows, on some level, that his grief is swallowing him whole. And while Nami, Usopp, and hell, even Luffy can probably sense it—Zoro is the only one who could literally knock some sense into Sanji and stop this cycle of grieving bullshit Sanji's putting himself through.
Through the ache in his jaw, Sanji inhales a deep drag from his cigarette, the burning smoke mixing with the faint taste of copper in his mouth from the punch Zoro gave to his jaw. "I don't know what to do with it," he lets out in a reluctant whisper. "All the love I have for her, I don't-I don't know what to do with it, where to put it." He pauses and takes another inhale of nicotine, "How do I be a person, without her in my life? She was taken so quickly, so abruptly."
Silence falls thickly around them.
"There's no answer I could give you that would satisfy you," Zoro answers in the quiet. "There is no rhyme or reason to who lives or dies. You can only live each day, giving it your all, following your dreams with the clarity and intensity that matches the depths of how much you have known loss. It's why I'm here—why we're all here on this ship. Nami, Usopp, even Luffy, we've all known loss. And we refuse to let it best us in the end."
For a moment, only the sounds of the waves gently lapping against the wood grain at the ship and the occasional breeze drifting across the sail echoed in the night sky. Sanji feels the impossible lump at the base of his throat, but he'll be damned if he cries in front of the idiot swordsman.An understanding silence flows easy between them, before Sanji asks, "Does it ever end?" his voice comes out in a whisper, something raw and deeply personal.
Zoro hesitates for a moment, swallowing thickly and staring across the inky dark horizon. The pitch black sky blends into the open waters, the only light coming from the gleaming moon above, brushing the tips of each wave in a shimmering silver. "I carry her with me always," he whispers, as if by speaking his old childhood's friend name aloud, he would summon her ghost to join yours on this haunted ship. "And I honor her memory by living freely," he ends, turning and breaking the trance of staring into the distance, and instead, grounding himself back on the Going Merry. He locks eyes with Sanji, and for once, there's no hostility to be met in his eyes.
Sanji's the first to look away, choosing to go back to staring at the horizon anyway. Zoro turns to leave, before clapping a hand on his crew mate's shoulder, "Stop being a dumbass and go to bed eventually." And with that, the soft quiet falls like a blanket across Sanji's shoulders as Zoro leaves and returns to his hammock.
With his second cigarette of the night at it's end, Sanji relishes the burning ache in the back of his throat as he holds the smoke against his chest. As if the bitter nicotine could ease the pain of loosing you. His dull eyes flit across the horizon, its raven black depths creating the illusion of floating in a void. Only the moon and stars guide his thoughts now, and the mottled orange embers of the end of his cigarette fade into shades of gray. With a heaving sigh that shakes loose the ache in his chest and the ash in his lungs, he reluctantly moves from the deck to one more sleepless night. Perhaps dawn will be kinder to him, morning sunlight easing his bones and the grief bottled in his heart.
But just as he turns from the deck, a cool wind brushes against the nape of his neck, chilling his spine. Call it sailor's intuition, call it paranoia, call it fate smiling kindly on him this once, just this one time, but Sanji stilled in his tracks and slowly turned back to the horizon. In that moment, a cloud hidden in darkness began to overtake the light of the moon, casting the creaking ship in darkness. Soft rumbling danced overhead as Sanji blinked his eyes to adjust to the new level of darkness, squinting to make out the muddled shapes of clouds in the distance. Slowly, winds crept in from the distance, brushing against the soft curl of the sails, whispering against his skin. Sanji could smell it on the air before he could put it in words.
A storm was coming.
As fast as he thought it, the ship tilted—not dramatically, but enough to cause warning. Winds began whipping by his head, and thunder grew louder above. Then the rains came, but Sanji wasn't on deck long enough to see it happen. Already, heart pounding, he raced to the main cabins and began pounding on doors. Voice hoarse and shouting, "Storm! There's a storm coming!" Icy chills gripped his heart. His feet slammed against the deck as he felt the wooden slats tilt against him, then away from him. Outside the hallway, rain that once began as a trickling grew quickly into hurried sheets, and Sanji swore that the wind itself cackled at his panic.
Barely organized chaos ruled on the Going Merry. Wind whipped the sail around, tilting and spinning the ship, and anything not tied down flung across deck. Rain and seawater slapped the ship around like it was an idle piece of driftwood, and among it all, the Straw Hats flew across the ship, attending to their duties. More organized pirate crews have gone down for much less on the Grand Line—the storms here were of a different caliber, attuned to no rhyme or reason.
"HEY!" Luffy's booming voice cut through the thunder and sleeting rain. Everyone paused and looked at their stretched out captain, wrapped around the mast and standing tall. "NO ONE GET'S LEFT BEHIND THIS TIME!" The crew stills for a moment before giving a shout in agreement and doubling down their efforts on securing the ship quickly and safely. Sanji darts across the deck, working hard between Luffy and Zoro—tying down ropes, securing the sails. Luffy uses his devil fruit powers to its fullest extent, stretching across the deck wherever he's needed. Nami and Usopp manage the rudder, trying desperately to steer the ship to go with the waves. All at once, Sanji's mind betrays him as memories of that fateful night flash across his face. He lost you, not too long ago, on a night just like this.
Wind howled in his ears as he squinted against the onslaught fo rain. The ship deck slanted causing him to slip and stumble as he tied down crates and barrels. Above, thunder and lightning roared in a vicious battle, the flashes of lightning the only thing to illuminate this nightmare turned real. He could feel the drumming heartbeat of panic in his ears as his adrenaline soared. In an instant, the ship creaked beneath his feet and slanted, rain and wind tormenting him. Sanji lost his footing and slammed into the ship's railing, his arms finding purchase against the wooden banister.
Then, a flash of pearl white, no bigger than a life preserver, glimmered against the inky waves, rising and falling. Sanji blinked rapidly against the rainwater pelting his face in icy bullets. Using one hand to wipe his face and shield his eyes just enough to focus on the waters—there! He saw it again! Some sort of swirling pearly light, coming out of the waves. It pulled to him, called to him in a trance.
Somewhere in the back of his mind, he could hear voices shouting at him, his crew mates' voices barely making it above the roaring thunderstorm. Sanji's breath hitched, and he smelled—no, he was going crazy. He smelled your perfume, drifting in from the winds, curling against his face. Your sweet aroma, taunting him on a night like this, so similar to the one where he couldn't save you.
"Hey!" Zoro's voice shouted, forcibly grabbing onto Sanji's arm still wrapped around the wooden railing. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"
Sanji's head whipped around to face Zoro, mind reeling with possibility, "Do you see it?" he shouted back, "Do you see the light?"
Zoro stared at Sanji in disbelief, "Hey, I know you're going insane right now but can you loose your mind when we get back inside the cabins?!"
"Idiot! Look at the water, you're telling me you don't see the glowing light?" Sanji yells back.
Zoro finally looks out at the rocky waves, the choppy waters rocking the boat are barely visible with the clouds covering the moonlight. Lighting streams across the sky, highlighting the sharp tips of each arc. Swinging his head back to Sanji, "You've lost your damn mind, cook!"
Sanji's gaze falls to the ocean, and he throws an arm out, pointing to the glowing orb of light in the waves. "Look! You're telling me you don't see anything out there?"
Zoro grunts in response, "I stand by what I said—if you're going to loose your mind do it inside!" He grabs onto Sanji's arm more forcefully, "Now c'mon already!"
"No!" Sanji barks, ripping his arm from Zoro's grasp, "I'm not leaving! It's her! I know it is!"
Zoro's gaze softens just slightly, "Sanji—"
"No!" Sanji continued, against the onslaught of the rain, "I know you think I've lost it, but are you telling me that in the Grand Line, where storms follow no logical pattern, where up is down and down is up—there isn't even the slightest possibility that there could be something there that I can see, but you can't?"
At that moment, Luffy stretched to join them, "What's the hold-up? Nami and Usopp are already inside!"
Zoro turned to Luffy, "Sanji's gone insane."
"I have not gone insane! Luffy, do you see a shining light on the waters?"
Luffy squinted against the rain and winds, one hand holding his hat in place, the other stretched and wrapped around the boat's railing. "Uhhh how about you come join the others inside, Sanji? You can cook us up some meat and get your head back on your shoulders!"
Sanji smacked his captain's head, "I'm not cooking you anything at a time like this!" He turned back out into the ocean as the waves rocked the boat. Again, he swore the winds cackled and laughed around him as the rain continued to pelt against the wooden deck. "There's something out there," he said, almost to himself. Sanji turned to look at both Zoro and Luffy, "I can't explain it, but there's something pulling me to the ocean! I know you don't see it, but I do." He fixes Luffy with a stone cold expression, "And I would bet my life on it."
"You're insane!" Zoro shouted.
"Would you bet ours?" Luffy countered, oddly still.
"What?" Sanji asked.
"Would you bet ours?" Luffy repeated still, ignoring the winds and the rain, the thunder and lightning, the way the ship rocked against his feet. "If you're determined to follow this light of yours, we don't leave our crew members behind."
Icy tremors climbed up Sanji's spine, panic and doubt seeping in. He glanced out across the waves, the light seemed to only grow in spite of the storm, swirling impossibly against the midnight hues of the sea. Whispers of winds howled in laughter in Sanji's face as he stared, almost entranced, by the ivory light gleaming like a beacon to him. And Sanji, delirious or disillusioned, was determined to follow like a moth to the flame.
He turned back to Luffy, locking eyes with the would-be pirate king. "You are my captain," his voice came out, almost broken, "And I will go with whatever you say. But that"—he flung his arm out, pointing towards the glowing pearlescent light—"is calling to me. And I must follow."
Luffy paused for a breath of a second, even the very storm putting the ship in this predicament seemed to still—if momentarily—and then he grinned as bright as the sun. "Then we'll all go!"
"WHAT?!" Zoro shouted, whipping around to look at his idiotic captain.
Luffy paid no mind, only clapping a hand onto Sanji's shoulder, "If you say we go to this glowing orb that's totally real and not just you hallucinating, then we go!"
Sanji stared, dumbfounded at Luffy. Granted, Luffy was never one to turn up his nose at the chance of a new adventure.
"Oh my god, we're all going to die because of the stupid cook's hallucinations," Zoro groaned, face palming.
"Zoro, you go get Nami and Usopp and update them on the situation. Sanji, you stay on deck and shout as loud as you can to help give me directions while I steer the rudder towards the glowing light!" Luffy gives a bright grin and two thumbs up before racing off without another thought, disappearing into the sheets of rain slapping against the deck.
Zoro glared at the cook, "You're even more insane than he is today."
"Well if I'm wrong in this one instance in the entire time you've known me—"
"You've been wrong more than once!"
"—I'll let you hold it against me, just this one time," Sanji gave a sharp grin.
Zoro chose not to respond, casting his gaze back out into the ocean, then back at Sanji. "It might not be her. It could be something else, someone else, luring us in."
Sanji grimaced and watched as the waters around the glowing light bobbed and danced around it in the lightning-lit waves. "Then we'll face it head on," he turned back to the swordsman, "as a crew."
Zoro gave the slightest smirk before turning to go relay the new plans to Nami and Usopp—who were sure to be thrilled about following the delusional cook's hallucinations into the ocean.
Almost at once, the storm shifted in intensity, winds cackled in sharp laughter against Sanji's ears, whipping sharply against the ship. Waves began rocking the Going Merry back and forth in earnest, and Sanji had to tighten his grip against the wooden railing. Thunder claps rippled across the sky, and lightning danced throughout the clouds. Looking out into the sea, the shimmering pearl of light seemed to grow as Sanji watched, it glowed from beneath the waters, and—was it sinking deeper?
"Further starboard!" he shouted, hoping against all odds that Luffy would be able to hear him from steering the rudder. The ship creaked and tilted beneath his feet, fighting against the natural motion of the waves clapping against the hull. Ever so slowly, the head of the ship began to line up with the ball of light sinking into the ocean. As it sank, it illuminated the waters around it, a single orb of stillness in the chaos-ruled seas. Washes of teal and deep blue swirled around the ivory pearl as it grew in size and cast beams of light out in the open waters. Waves stirred against it, clashing and falling into each other as the winds began to pick up speed. The torrential downpour of rain fell in sheets across the deck as Sanji's arms twisted against the banister, and the ship tilted away from him.
"Keep on forward!" he shouted into the wind, and when he had looked back, he saw Zoro helping Luffy with the rudder. Nami and Usopp clung to each other almost comically as they watched the ship being steered further into the storm. Sanji grimaced and turned back to lock eyes on the orb of light. The Going Merry rocked and plunged headfirst into the storm, splitting through the walls of rain and racing against the winds. Waves rose and washed across the deck, but still the ship carried on. Growing larger and larger, the glowing pearlescent orb beckoned Sanji closer with every passing breath. Whispers and laughter in a language Sanji couldn't distinguish echoed in his ears as the waters drew the Straw Hat's ship closer and closer.
All of a sudden, the winds shifted and the waves stopped desperately pushing against the ship—and started pulling her in. An icy tremor ran down Sanji's spine, what if Zoro was right? What if this thing, this light, was playing on Sanji's emotions? What if it wasn't a map that lead to you, what if it was something far more sinister?
The boards creaked beneath his feet as the Going Merry began tilting dramatically, rain sloshing across deck. Sanji stared in horror as the glowing orb illuminated the true gravity of their situation—it wasn't merely a bystander in the storm, it was the storm. Waves with sharp peaks ebbed and flowed around the light, encircling it, and worst of all, Sanji had led them straight into the deadly currents. Terror griped his heart, his ribs aching in his chest, as the ship was all but helpless to bob along in the swirling ocean. With a deep groan, the ship slanted once more, caught like a fly in a web, encircling the light.
Round 'n round the ship began to circle, the stress on the hull causing the boards to creak and groan in protest. Sanji's heart leapt to his throat, eyes wide as the gleaming light taunted him and beckoned him ever closer—a moth helpless against the temptation of the flame. Luffy's question echoed in his mind, is he really willing to risk their lives? On what could be just a stupid hunch?
The very air around him seemed to pulsate with energy as the rains pelted mercilessly against his skin, thunder a continuous roar above. As the light grew brighter, the circles grew tighter, and the Straw Hats very quickly found themselves edging below the inky dark horizon. Angled drastically, each member clung to any part of the ship they could as it tilted in a dizzying swirling whirlpool. Sanji stood, frozen in panic and clinging to the banister of the ship, eyes locked in on the taunting light. Winds whipped across the deck, cackling with laughter that echoed in each acoustic corner, teasing his nerves. Seconds stretched into eons as the ship's path grew tighter and tighter with each turn, and the waves surrounding them grew taller and taller, reaching higher than the mast itself.
Salt spray splashed across Sanji's face as he stood, mesmerized entirely by the glowing orb which had grown to the size of a house. The ship circled so tightly his head spun, and if he had better footing he might've had the courage to reach out and touch the enchanting light. To brush his fingers through its rays spread across the deck. The pirate ship soon began to reach its intense crescendo as it encircled the glowing light, the pressure locking every crew member in place, pushed against whatever wall, railing, or foothold they've found. Thunder raged and lighting crackled the sky, the storm itself wailing onward—for the Going Merry was sinking into the abyss.
݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ summary: [angst] The ocean is cruel and merciless. Sometimes, the biggest hurdles the Straw Hats face isn't a monster or larger-than-life pirate, sometimes, it's just the ruthless nature of the sea.
݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ warnings: [Dead Dove DO NOT EAT] Dead!Reader / loss of consciousness / lots of descriptions of pain, burning alive, being skinned / panic attacks / i don't know if it still counts as being a Dead!Reader???
݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ AN: this chapter was a doozy!! ended up being around 7.3k words, which is a bit long compared to other chapters but I had a lot of ground I wanted to cover. If you want to be added to the tag list, please comment below!!!! And thanks to everyone for all the support, please enjoy!! ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡
[Overboard pt. 1]
[Overboard pt. 2]
[Overboard pt. 3]
[Overboard pt. 4]
[Overboard pt. 5]
[Overboard pt. 6] <----you are here!
˚ ✦ . . ˚ . . ✦ ˚ . ★⋆.
An indeterminable amount of time ago……..
You don't remember waking up. You don't remember much of anything, really. It felt like you were floating adrift somewhere, consciousness thinning at the edges. It's like there was nothing, and then, all of a sudden, there you were. A tug, gently in your chest, began pulling you from… wherever you were. This tug, this pull, began reeling you in, back into consciousness. Your senses began tingling, sparks shooting along your nervous system, and you felt as though an impossibly large and heavy blanket was being peeled off you slowly. The blanket surely had to be covered in brambles, it pulled at your skin, leaving pinpricks against your sides. Like a match being struck, pain flared in your senses, growing sharper and sharper the more the tug pulled you. The heat ensnared your heart, the dull ache growing larger and larger until it was impossible to ignore. It burned inside you, it felt like you were being choked by the flames. The agonizing pain continued to grow along with your senses coming back to you, trailing from the tips of your toes up your legs, tearing at your skin and clawing up your chest, the heat burning against your neck up to your scalp.
All you knew was pain. Searing, unavoidable, impossible pain, flooding your system, tearing you through whatever empty space you had come from. The tug, gentle at first, turned tighter, coiling around you and binding you together and bringing you to the surface. Time was a concept lost on you, every sensation happening both instantaneously and dragging onwards. With every burning sensation, you began growing acutely aware of the stillness of your body. No twitch of your nose, no furrow of your brows, no flick of your eyes, or tension held in your shoulders—a complete and total stillness as your mind began waking. At this realization, a flood of emotions raced through your mind, falling on top of each other instantaneously. The sensation of being trapped in your own still body begins choking you—though there is no breath nor beating heart to choke. This moment feels as though it lasts forever and happens in under a millisecond all at the same time, and your senses continue to grow. The flames ensnaring your heart pound louder against your nervous system, heat becoming well beyond the point of unbearable—but you bear it nonetheless. You must. You're not even sure why you must, it is some instinctive thought, that you have to bear this. There is no other option for you.
The flames ravage against your skin, feeling as though countless layers and layers of blankets you didn't even realize you were covered in were burning. Heat peeled back the layers holding you still, and when the heaviness fled you hoped desperately that the heat would stop, that the tugging—no, yanking—would stop. It pressed on, burning against your flesh like daggers piercing against your skin. It clawed into you, tearing you to ribbons, but no matter how much it clawed, you kept your consciousness despite all of this. Surely, you couldn't take much more of this. Surely, at some point, the sweet release of this pain would let go its iron grasp on your consciousness, and you would be allowed to sink further into the abyss you came from. Layer after layer of skin was peeled away from you, leaving you wholly bare, and yet, the fire wasn't satisfied. You felt the fire nestle up against your mind, stroking the mental pathways. Every sense of yours was screaming in agony—your body being split and divided in this nothingness as the tugging sensation pulled on each tiny piece of yours spread across this moment of time.
As the heat curled against your mind, pain exploded across your nervous system. It felt as though it was trying to cut through the deepest of layers covering your brain, as though you were coming out of an exceptionally deep sleep. Part of you wanted to just remain at peace in the abyss, in the nothingness you came from before your consciousness ebbed into existence once more. The deepest of sleeps awaited you, and its taste intoxicated you. The fire grew desperate, lashing out and clawing its way towards your memories. Flashes of you of who you used to be began trickling in. Your first sensation of remembrance—the feeling of heat. The heat of sunshine on a summer's day, a hot crackling fire in the evening chill, the warm breath of someone pressed up against your neck. From there, the memories cracked open, beginning to trickle through in flashes of sensation. The warmth of a hand holding yours, body heat leftover from a jacket kindly draped across your shoulders, the hot trail of a tongue pressed into your pulse point. The heat of a body laying against yours, the fire of passion, of love. Of a love so true it could break every natural order of the world, of a love pursued across worlds, across time.
Somewhere, far away, you feel the sensation of sound being returned to you. Someone breathes your name, in a hushed reverence. The way their mouth sounds out your name stirs something inside you, something familiar. They repeat your name, and with each utterance of your name, the tugging sensation grows, like a ship pulling in an anchor. Even without ears in this form you exist in, you can still hear the desperation growing in their tone. Their voice sounded so familiar… you were sure of it! The heat pressed on as more memories began flooding in. A smile, a wink, a soft kiss pressed against your hand. Arms that held you, that grounded you against any nightmare. Legs so strong they could carry you out of any battle, striding confidently alongside you as you walked along beaches, exploring islands. Shoulders that you would rest your head on, lean against, wrap your arms around in affection. Lips that would brush against your own in such sweet tenderness it felt impossible that you could ever know such softness.
With each sweet memory, the tugging on you became impossible to ignore, a sense of growing heartache taking over your senses. You—you had lost someone, hadn't you? Or maybe you were the one lost from them. A startling realization washed over you, a name began forming at the tips of your consciousness, and with it, the pulling intensified. It felt as though every fiber of your body was being yanked in one direction. Memories of a man, kind and sweet, heart with love for you, ambitious and passionate towards his dreams—these memories strengthened a resolve from deep within you. With each pull on your soul, you began matching it beat for beat. A source of determination erupted, from where you find this resolve you'll never know. Soon enough, you and this mysterious force working in tandem. You don't know where your determination comes from, but you find it anyway. Because this world does not give out second chances, but by some miracle above, the very stars themselves cried out in despair. And you will grab this singular lifeline with all the resolve echoing in your soul, from the love you received and freely gave throughout your life. It propels you forward—though you swear you have to gather every singular fiber of your being and draw them close. You stitch yourself back together, with one name on your lips. You piece your own body together, with one name on your lips. You gather through the pain, through the fire and flames, crawling upwards from this abyss—defying every known physical law of reality. And you do it all with one name on your lips, of the man of your heart. The man who you swore and promised to love, who still holds your heart in his grasp and you with his.
And so you pulled yourself out of this pit, time a concept not present in this abyss was the only mercy afforded to you at this time. Every instant of your existence was pain, something akin to swimming upstream against a raging current. The fabric of the universe demanded you lay at rest, but the mysterious force would not let you lie. And you would never give up on him, you couldn't. It wasn't even a question in your mind, giving into surrender. In this space, it felt as though you were living through eons. All your knew was this pain and fire, pulling yourself forward, but you would not give in to fear. You repeated his name over and over to yourself like a mantra, the memories of the love the two of you shared the only thing propelling you forward, coupled with the anticipation of one day finding yourself on the other side of this pit.
Your heartbeat thrummed louder and louder, echoing in your ears. Each beat kept your pace as you clawed your way out, the mysterious force dragging you beyond your own natural limits—though nothing about this was natural. Slowly, you felt your surroundings change. The fire at your fingertips began dying down—finally surrendering under your determination. Victory would be yours, you would make it so.
Bursting forth from the final layer keeping you trapped and drowning in this abyss, your hand clasped a physical object, a doorknob, and you pushed with all your might.
Skin raw and flushed red, you appeared in the entryway of a strange room filled to the brim of pillows and oddities. All of your senses came rushing back all at once, flooding your nervous system as your heart and lungs had to re-learn how to cooperate together. A strangled gasp escaped from your lips as your eyes flared in pain from the light of the room, opening for the very first time. The first word past your lips, "Sanji!" you gasped, before promptly collapsing in a heap on the ground.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next time you wake, it is much less painful, but no less traumatic. You awake with a gasp, throwing yourself upright in a strange bed, surrounded by strange ornaments and comforts. You roll off the bed in a heap, gasping as you struggle to take in air that doesn't hurt to breathe.
"Easy, easy now," a soft voice comes from the corner of the room as a stranger enters and rushes to your side. They take your hand and place it on their own chest, and a heartbeat echoes in your finger tips. "Let your heart feel my rhythm and copy it. Try to not think about it as much, your body has memories deeper than you know, it will find its pace."
Your eyes are wild and frantic, mind going haywire in chaos as your body tries to function normally again. You can feel everything and nothing all at once, and your breath comes out shaky and unstable. Darkness creeps at the corner of your vision as your strangled gasps come too far apart for enough oxygen to support your system.
The being in front of you grimaces and calls out, "Lachesis! Bring us the tea!" They turn to face you once more, face draw in worry, and you're not sure if it's because of the lack of air in your lungs but you swear, their facial features shift just slightly with each blink. Oh right, you have to remember how to blink now too. Your eyes burn as you blink rapidly, trying to remember the daily invisible functions of your body all at once. You try desperately to focus on matching the being's smooth, even breathing, against your choking breaths. In moments, another strange purple woman rushes to join the two of you, bringing a delicate mug with a lemon-sweet aroma.
The first being takes the mug and turns to you in a smile, "Darling, you should drink the tea, it'll help, I promise. It's a small sedative—"
Your eyes widen and you franticly shake your head, not wanting to go back to anything even remotely close to the abyss with it's numbing and fire against your senses.
"—but your body is going into overdrive right now, and if you don't calm down you'll pass out again," they finish, a worried look in their eyes.
Your breathing comes out in short panicked gasps, panting as the purple one goes to grab your hand, steadying you.
"It's alright," her voice comes out soft and steady, as though talking to a spooked animal, "The tea is just meant to help relax your body enough so that it stops thinking too hard about trying to function and goes back to doing it naturally. It's a small sedative, you'll still be fully conscious through it and everything."
"You don't have to drink the tea if you don't want to, hun," the first being adds, gently holding the mug towards you.
A beat of silence passes, the only sounds echoing the room are your harsh inhales and trembling exhales. Tremors wrack your body, and sweat drips down the back of your neck down your spine. Your eyes burn as you forget to blink once more, and then you shakily nod. You reach out to try to grab the mug, but your hand shakes so much just reaching forward, that you couldn't possibly grasp it.
The being steps closer to you in understanding, and with the lavender woman supporting you at your side, they gently lift the mug to your lips. A honey-lemon scent wafts from the mug—even just smelling the steam sends a calming sensation through you. Steeling yourself, you slowly take tiny sips of the tea. Not even enough to warrant a swallow, just enough that it coats your tongue in sweetness. You don't trust yourself enough to be able to swallow liquid, if you're having this much trouble learning to breath again.
Both creatures are incredibly patient as you sip more and more of the tea, and slowly, the tension begins to leave your body. As you grow more relaxed, you begin taking larger amounts of the tea, letting the honey coat your throat as the lemon refreshes your senses pleasantly. With each passing drink, you feel a soft haze come over your body. Nothing like the abyss you just came from, no, it's different. You feel the tea begin to wash over your body, like the feeling of taking a hot bath. Soothing, warm, and cleansing. The lavender woman helps you sit back down on the bed, sinking into its plush with a soft sigh.
As you continue to drink the lemon-sweet tea, you take a moment to gather in your surroundings. Swirls of color, fabrics so rich and elegantly embroidered fill the bedroom. Off to the side, a couple of bookshelves stand tall, decorated with countless books, artifacts, and trinkets, each more strange and foreign than the last. In the corner opposite the bed, a classic looking spinning wheel felt remarkably out of place amidst the extravagant colors spread across the room. Soft brown wood curved and twisted from legs into a stand, where a large wheel sat atop. Threaded in between its mechanisms, a soft baby blue length of yarn lay half twisted in a spool—as if someone had stopped mid-way through spinning the fibers. Out of everything else in the room, this spinning wheel kept catching your gaze and drawing your attention. Your eyes would circle the room hesitantly, slowly taking in your strange surroundings as your memories remain a haze. But the spinning wheel, with all its unassuming wood and metallic counterparts, seemed to stir something in you.
The being sitting across from you, whose facial features seemed to shift with every passing glance, gives you a gentle smile as you let the still-warm mug rest in your hands. "Now that you've calmed down a bit, darling, would you mind telling me how much you remember?"
Your brows furrow together in concentration. Your mind feels fuzzy, but you have inklings of a few memories, "I remember," your voice comes out hoarse, your tongue feeling unfamiliar in your own mouth, "someone…" you trail off. A warm flush of embarrassment coats your cheeks, and you avoid their gaze. "I wish I could be more specific, but," you huff in frustration, "I don't…I don't know how to describe it."
They nod encouragingly, "That's quite normal for someone who's been through what you have."
"What…I have?" you question, words still coming out stilted and awkward, as though you were remembering how to speak again for the first time.
The two creatures sitting before you exchange an impossible to decipher look, before the one across from you leans forward and touches your knee slightly. "Darling," they begin, "you were given a second chance at life."
"Was I…am I…?" you trail off, eyes widening in shock. If it weren't for the tea helping keep your nervous system calm, you would've begin to hyperventilate.
The lavender woman sitting next to you leans against your shoulder reassuringly, and the soft warmth from her helps ground you as she begins. "Every so often, a love reincarnates in the form of a couple. While this love doesn't always turn romantic—though it often leans that way—this love strides to find itself in every life, in every world." She pauses for a moment, carefully choosing her wording, "In a way, I suppose you humans would call them 'soulmates'. But it's the same love, being reborn time and time again, to try and—"
"Wait, Lachesis," the other one warned, shaking their head slightly.
Lachesis flushed slightly at being rebuked, "Well, what I mean to say is," she began again, turning towards you, "you were given a second chance at life and at your love."
You begin shaking your head slowly, "I'm so sorry, but, I don't…" you trail off, trying to find the words.
The being across you smiles gently, somehow knowing your internal confusion. "You know," they begin, standing from their chair, "often times when my own mind feels scattered, it helps to give my hands idle work," they pause, standing beside the spinning wheel. Their hands idly trace the patterns carved into the back of the chair sitting in front of the wheel.
There's a strange magnetism coming from the spinning wheel—it's presence has drawn your gaze since first waking up. Like there's some instinctual part in you that recognizes you might find something you lost there.
Unbeknownst to you, the two strange creatures exchange an undecipherable look. Ages of magic and mysticism are exchanged in it, as a familiar story is unfolding before their very eyes.
Slowly, without even realizing it, you've stood and moved over to the carved wooden chair in front of the spinning wheel. Entranced by the wheel, your hand reaches out and thumbs the soft blue yarn, twirled into a spool. It's soft and oddly warm. It tugs at your heartstrings for some reason, stirring a memory deeper than surface level. A memory so intertwined and twisted into every part of your being, as if this yarn was the yarn that stitched up your consciousness and helped pull you from the abyss. Somewhere, you hear the surf crashing into the shore.
"We'll leave you to it darling, feel free to come downstairs or take a break as you need. Take your time," their voice floats over to you as you sit at the chair and scoot closer.
You feel rude, not giving a response, but the two creatures have left you in peace and gently closed the door behind them. Your hands have never spun before, but you find that you already know the motions, feeding the fibers through the mechanisms. Gently, you rock against the pedal, sending the wheel spinning smoothly. The room is quiet, save for the soft whirring of the machine under your touch. It reverberates across the room of trinkets and oddities, the backing soundtrack to your mind lost in thought. As easily as the fibers become thread, spurts of memories begin unveiling themselves. There is no rhyme or reason, no chronological order to the memories. You spend nearly twenty minutes remembering picking fresh peaches from an orchard, the way the heat felt on your skin and the way juice dripped down your chin from sun-ripened sweetness. It takes all of five minutes for you to remember the long, dreary, and entirely uneventful lectures from your schooling. But you dawdle, spending a bit more time on the idle doodles you and your friends would make in the margins of your notebooks to pass the time by. You remember your hometown—old familiar buildings, the same old horizon stretching out before you, the way the tired shadows sunk into the same corners they always have and always will. The bakery shop that you'd frequent with the smell of sweet breads drifting to the streets; the library with its dusty tomes in forgotten corners, with maps so large depicting a world so, so much bigger than you could've ever dreamed of.
Over time—though if questioned, you're not quite sure how much time—the fibers reach their end and the spool of yarn is complete. You feel impossibly warm, a flush painted on your cheeks, like you've been sitting in front of a fire this entire time. It's only when your stomach gives an embarrassingly loud grumble do you rise from the chair and twist the knob on the door to the rest of the house.
Three voices are chattering away downstairs, including another strange creature you hadn't met yet. Your eyes take in your surroundings slowly—walls are piled high with shelves, a full extension from the smaller bedroom you were just in. A railing spans the perimeter of the room, letting one walk around this second floor while still gazing into the open living room space below. Rugs spanned across railings, as if someone was in the middle of dusting them but didn't mind enough to put them back where they belonged. On second glance, however, the entire room was covered in pillows and blankets, heaps of them, piles of them, that even if you wanted to place a rug down, there would be no floor space for it to fit. In the center of the big living room on the first floor, a central fireplace crackled and spit sparks into the air. Though there was no chimney, smoke never seemed to linger in the room or stick to the richly color pillows. Rather, at the very top of the room a glass ceiling spanned the distance, revealing a hazy evening sky and a soft dream of a moon rising slowly.
Heat rises to your face as you realize you're not even sure of your hosts' names, let alone where you are at this moment. At that moment, the lavender woman spots you at the top of staircase. A bright smile spreads across her face, "You're awake!" She turns just as quickly to the other creature she was talking with, "Clotho, Clotho look! She's awake!"
The blue-green creature, with hair tangled between pillows and blankets and currently laying face down beside the lavender woman, "That's so great, Lachesis, maybe you should go talk with her now?" they grunted, voice muffled from the pillows.
A soft giggle like wind chimes comes from the other one you recognize—the one with facial features that shift every other glance, who seems to be constantly emitting a soft glow about themselves. They look up at you and meet your gaze, their eyes changing color as you blink but the mirth behind them remaining. "Hello darling," their voice rises up to meet you, "How was your time at the spinning wheel?"
"Good," you say, and you can't find the right words to describe more than that. It's terribly vague, but the figure seems to know exactly what you're feeling nonetheless. They give you a warm smile as they stand and greet you at the bottom of the staircase.
"Would you like something to eat? You must be famished after the journey you've taken," they begin, and as if on cue, your stomach grumbles again which sends another bout of soft pink to your face. Their smile spreads wider as they guide you to sit near the fire, and quickly they return from a kitchen lost in the house with a warm bowl of soup. Its flavor is rich and filling, the kind that warms you entirely from the inside out and makes you feel alive again.
As you eat the soup, by the time you're on your second bowl of generous portions, you've learned the three beings names—Lachesis, the lavender woman, Clotho, the one who enjoys sleep too much to properly join the conversation, and Atropos, the one who found you once you woke. Between Lachesis and Atropos, you've begun to slowly wrap your mind around where you are. Or rather, where you aren't.
"The home takes us to where we need to go," Atropos answered your question breezily, as if that cryptic statement actually solved any of your wondering. "It exists in its own way, with it's own heart," and they nodded towards the firepit in the center of the home.
"So the house is alive?" You respond.
Atropos shrugs, "Aren't all homes?"
Listening to the stories from the two mysterious creatures, you find yourself captivated as they describe the other travelers they've met along the way. They describe people from times long before yours, in ways so accurate you begin to suspect that they're much older than their youthful appearance would have you believe. But any questions about themselves—their history or where they come from—were met with equally confusing answers and knowing looks exchanged between the duo. Clotho, the third one, chimes in with the occasional sarcastic remark that sends Lachesis in a tizzy, in a way that only two people who have known each other for ages can do in just a sentence. For the most part, however, they lie there so still you're sure they're sleeping through the entire conversation.
By the time you finish your third bowl, you notice a soft ache just now makes itself known through your body, as though you had been running for quite some time and just now stopped to rest. Your eyelids feel heavy, sitting contentedly and watching the fire, the soft plush of the pillows cradling your body.
Atropos looks over at you with that ever-knowing smile, "You should rest now, dearie, your body has put itself through a lot today."
You barely manage to give a hum of agreement in response, before you drift away to the soft crackling of the fire and whispers exchanged between these three beings that have taken you in, under the darkening evening dusk settling in the skylight.
The first thing you come to realize after waking up the following day is that time flows differently in this house than you expect. There are no clocks or watches to be found, and even monitoring the day through the light in the sky proves difficult. You could spend what feels like a couple of hours reading through an old book borrowed from their shelves at the beginning of daybreak, only to find yourself deep in twilight the next time you look through the skylight.
The second thing you notice is that the beings would often disappear at random intervals, not all together, sometimes just one would be out, or even two at a time. On the rare occasion, all three would be out, but that only happened twice now so far. But each time they return without fail, usually within the same day, or at least same couple days.
The trio had convinced you to stay in their care until your body had fully recovered, including your memories. The spinning wheel, you found out, actually belonged to Clotho. At first, you asked if they were all healers, but Clotho simply grinned in a way that slightly unnerved you, before answering, "I like to think of us as gardeners. Sometimes, you have to prune the branches."
You spent your days in a haze, sleeping more than normal and eating ravenously, as though you had been starving for weeks. When you could, you spent time at the wheel—the trio kept you busy. On your first full day, Atropos approached you with a small basket of loose fibers clumped together. It wasn't as though she was assigning you work to do (though you would be more than happy to help with the chores about the house), it was more she could tell you needed it. Something to keep your hands busy, as your memories came back in increments.
Your childhood, mixed memories of good and bad. The times you felt joy so intense you would've swore you were floating on air, and the times so dark and deep you found yourself weeping as you spun the fibers into thread. Memories of people, close friends, family members, those you had loved and lost. Most recently, your memories have been including a ship, big and bright and bold—full of promise of adventure.
Occasionally, one of the trio would sit with you as you spun. Lachesis would often chat softly with you, listening as you spoke of the memories of your life. She wanted to hear about the first time you fell in love, of the kind girl with soft brown eyes and lopsided glasses, the two of you playing on the playground near your home. The two of you would chat and before you knew it, an entire spool of yarn would be completed.
Clotho would sit in silence with you, watching you work. If you hadn't been so concentrated on the way the threads moved through your fingers, the motion combing through your memories and coaxing them to the surface, you would've noticed their face. Honest, and bare of the wicked smirk they so often wear against the world, as if recalling memories of their own as you work.
When Atropos would join you, they brought a large notepad with them and broken piece of graphite with them. They sketched you as you worked, never showing the final piece at the end of the session, and when you'd inquire about it, they'd give you a warm smile and smooth over your curiosity with, "I will not delude myself into thinking you'll stay with us forever, and I should like a keepsake of your time with us."
Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months, as the group of you found a steady routine that felt like home. When your hands ached and memories turned fuzzy from the work of the spinning wheel, you'd find yourself perusing any of the books you could get your hands on. You studied maps of ancient worlds, of places far beyond your wildest imagination. As your memories grew, a soft heartache demanded to be felt. The memory of those you left behind, your closest friends who you had just set out into the world with. Luffy, you remembered first, with his bright smile and boisterous laugh. Your captain. You remembered Nami, and you began studying these old maps in earnest, committing some to memory and others to detailed sketches in a notebook Lachesis kindly let you keep. Zoro followed soon after—the brave swordsman—when your hands spun a yarn of different shades of olive green turning deeper into a rich forest green. Shortly thereafter, you remembered Usopp and his stories, his love of inventions. You sketched out diagrams of the oddly-designed trinkets tucked away on the bookshelves.
You remembered all of them, not with the ache of never hoping to see them again, but with the foolhardy assuredness of hope that you will cross paths with them all again.
And yet, each time you would think on them, on the ship the Going Merry, you couldn't help but tear up. Too many times you would be spinning a bright blue yarn, brighter than the sea at noon, and you would wake from your trance to find your cheeks wet and throat hoarse, as though you had been weeping for hours. The heartache continued to grow as time went on, a stubborn memory that refused to reveal itself. A song burried deep in your heart was crying out, a song you spoke about in hushed whispers on the rare occasion when Lachesis would join you at the wheel.
"There's someone I forgot," you'd whisper, hands busy at the wheel. "It feels like I'm choking on a gasp burried deep in my throat."
She could do nothing but look at you in pity, and it burned inside you.
The memory of your death haunted you, but Atropos warned you against pressing too hard against it.
"A life once taken, is not easily given back," they explained once, in a hushed voice pressed up near you by the fire as it spat sparks. "Trying too hard to remember the moment of your death would be like tempting fate," they give you a coy smile as their hand reaches for yours. The two of you link arms like old friends, watching the fire.
"This feels different than the memory of my death," you murmured in response, eyebrows furrowing in concentration. "It's not as much a singular memory that evades me, it's as though something has been cut out of a picture. From multiple pictures." Your voice trails off, and the two of you sit in the silence of the moment for a while.
Atropos stills, eyes searching the fire for the right answer. From your time with them, you know it's best to stay silent, waiting patiently as Atropos pieces the right words together to communicate effectively.
"Do you remember the first day you awoke here?" they begin, hesitation creeping in the edges of their tone. "And Lachesis and I were explaining the circumstances of your situation?"
You nod slowly, not voicing a response to encourage Atropos to continue.
They sigh slowly, a thumb absentmindedly stroking against your hand, "We've never explained the full story. Millenia ago, long before humans sailed the seas, before hands would find each other sitting across a hot fire on a cold night, the night sky was ablaze with stars. Two stars, in particular, wove their paths together. Ebbing and flowing, these stars spent centuries together and grew passionate towards each other. As they twinkled in the sky, they watched over humanity beginning to grow across the lands. Each night sky, they watched—humans finding each other in the darkness, reaching out for one another. And though they lived such short, fleeting lives, compared to that of ancient stars, they loved so fierce and so bright it made these two stars burn in envy."
Atropos sighed, the way someone sighs when they already know how the story ends, and yet, they tell it still. "The way humans love—so true and devoted, despite however short of time they truly get with each other—the stars grew envious. They wanted a life of their own, that they might have arms to hold, lips to touch, and hearts to share the same beat. Between the two of them, they harbored such a love together, and they vowed to find each other in every lifetime, across any world, as humans."
For a moment, Atropos pauses in the silence. The firepit in front of you crackles in the quiet, and you ponder if the story ends there, before they continue.
"To love as an immortal is such a fickle thing," their voice sounds like the winds across the sea on a silent night. "But to love as a human? To love, knowing, that your time together is limited? There is nothing more true than that. To give your all and leave nothing back. That's the kind of love the stars wanted to live."
They sighed, "They knew the risks. Life is never so sweet and easy, and…" Atropos voice waivers, before shaking their head. "On their first full life together, he died too young. Young even for human standards, and the grief from his partner would shake the world ten times over. His partner took his body and bound him to his own back. He carried his lover to the top of the highest mountain, climbing for days. He went up above the clouds, and on the clearest night, under the very same sky these two first fell in love, he wept. He wept for the time they should've both had together, he wept for the life they could never have together. He wept for the sake of his partner, and for the sake of himself. His weeping moved the heavens above, those that knew the two lovers, and even those that didn't. Stars all across the skies wept in sympathy, and eventually, with the entire host of twinkling lights crying out, they caught the attention of the gods."
Atropos closed their eyes, as if lost in the moment of retelling the legend. "The gods could not rule against death, against the natural order of things. There are some things even gods cannot fight against, but, with all the stars across the skies weeping and crying out at this lost love…" Atropos trailed off, a soft, watery smile spreading across their face. "Well, even gods can have hearts sometimes. They offered this couple a chance for infinite reincarnations. The chance to make true to their vow, and find each other in every lifetime, across any world and every sea. They never promised an easy love, but they did promise a chance at life together."
They opened their eyes, and turned to face you. The flickering shadows danced across their face, sculpting soft curves and highlighting the ever-changing features of their face. Atropos smiled warmly at you, "My dearest, my sisters and I believe that you are part of this love."
Your heart skipped a beat in your chest, as if recognizing this story somewhere, from a memory that by all accounts, should've never been yours to begin with. "I-I don't know what to say," you respond.
Atropos squeezes your hand, "Your memories will come back to you in time, my darling. Follow the pull on your heart next time you spin, call out to the love you know is deep inside your memories."
You nod, unable to find any of the right words to respond to the revelation. And the two of you sit with the fire, under a twinkling night sky, with the stars eager to witness your next move.
The next day, you hardly eat any breakfast. You move as if in a trance, waking and changing from your night time clothes (kindly loaned from Lachesis), and you find yourself sitting at the spinning wheel. You didn't greet a good morning to Clotho—they had disappeared at some point before you woke. Something about new visitors, but you couldn't bring yourself to pay attention to Atropos' explanation. Your hands moved easily through the practiced motion, and the soft whirring of the wheel filled the room. The scent of the ocean spray and teakwood filled the air, a note of citrus and something deeply bitter—tabacco—complimented the smell. The memory of a laugh, big and bright and warming your entire body. You felt heat, rising slowly before encompassing all your senses. The heat of a campfire, no, a bonfire more like. It grew and roared, sending a flush against your skin. Hands, rough and calloused from constant work, matched and intertwined within yours. The flash of a smile in your mind's eye, a smirk spread across a beautiful face, stubbled chin. Soft golden hair, blown askew in the ocean breeze, and a laugh bubbled up in your chest. Strong arms wrapped around you in the dead of night, pulling you in even as you slept. A rhythm of a heartbeat echoed in your mind, and the spinning wheel spun even faster.
You followed the pull of your heart, and a memory unraveled with it. The memory of your love, filling in the gaps of everything you've been missing. Without even noticing, you had begun to hum a tune—a song woven its way through the missing gaps. This tune, you recognized it, they played it at the restaurant on your first date, didn't they? Where you and your love danced, at a restaurant near the beach. You had danced until your feet ached, but you didn't care. Not when you were so easily swept up in his arms, with his charming smile and steady hands to guide you. The song had followed you on your travels together, it had become a secret good luck charm between the two of you. You hummed as you spun, singing softly as the memory became clearer into view. The ache in your chest demanded—screaming—to be felt, a heartbreak at the prospect of potentially never locking eyes with his ocean blue ones. The eyes that haunted your dreams every night here, the eyes that matched every spool of blue yarn you spun.
Distantly, you heard voices from downstairs. The new guests, you would've presumed in the back of your mind, had you not been so incredibly intertwined in this memory. Your love's name still escaped you, but his memory was setting your soul ablaze with longing. You yearned for his touch, his presence his arms to wrap around you and carry you out of this place. You missed him beyond words, and the heartache in your chest grew louder. Tears flowed down your cheeks as you desperation to find him intensified. Remembering him felt like everything finally, finally, clicking into place. Remembering him felt as essential as remembering how to breathe, and with the memory of your love, everything seemed to shine brighter around you. It's as if you had been living in the shadows until this moment. With each pounding beat of your heart, your love song grew louder, and you vaguely registered footsteps climbing the staircase outside your door. You sing along to the song, and in an instant—
The door swings open, almost rattling the frame. And you freeze, hands stilling from your work at the spinning wheel.
A gasp is ripped at your throat as your heart burns with desire, the man of your heart stands before you—disheveled and looking as though he hasn't slept for months, and as beautiful as the day you lost him. Your voice comes out shaky and broken, rich with hope, "Sanji?"
And he is by your side in the next beat of your heart, falling to his knees and reaching for you—to hold you, feel the touch of your skin against his. Tears are wet upon your cheeks, but his arms fall through you, gliding through them like mist from the early morning sea. Your hope landslides into misery at this new torturous trick, some dreamlike trance surely must be upon you. You are impossibly still in your chair, frozen in shock and surely convinced this must be some trick of the spinning wheel as you unlock your memories. Your heart is pounding against your chest as you gently move one of your hands to cup his cheek, to convince yourself of reality. But you find no purchase against his skin, his warmth does not find its was into your fingertips. Your chest aches in pain. "Sanji," you breath out, voice choking on the word as hot tears rush down your face.
"Mon cœur, mon amour, je suis là, je suis là, I will never leave you again," Sanji desperately tries to comfort you, his hands unable to touch you, to hold you, wipe your tears away. "I will always come find you, mon amour, and this time, I will never let you go again."
˚ ✦ . . ˚ . . ✦ ˚ . ★⋆.
"Mon cœur, mon amour, je suis là, je suis là." - My heart, my love, I am here, I am here
Comment to be added to the taglist!
- @thereal0lorax
- @aiz-00
- @daisydovley
݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ summary: [angst] The ocean is cruel and merciless. Sometimes, the biggest hurdles the Straw Hats face isn't a monster or larger-than-life pirate, sometimes, it's just the ruthless nature of the sea.
݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ warnings: [Dead Dove DO NOT EAT] Dead!Reader / grief / mentions of drowning / mentions of throwing up
݁⋆⭒˚.⋆ AN: special shout out to @thereal0lorax for asking if i had a taglist, this chapter goes out to you lol! If you want to join the taglist, comment below!!
[Overboard pt. 1]
[Overboard pt. 2]
[Overboard pt. 3]
[Overboard pt. 4] <----you are here!
[Overboard pt. 5]
[Overboard pt. 6]
˚ ✦ . . ˚ . . ✦ ˚ . ★⋆.
Sanji was nervous. No, terrified would've been closer to the right word. He stood in front of the mirror in the bathroom, anxiously going over his appearance and combing through his hair. His pulse raced just below his neck, and he swallowed the lump in his throat. Tonight had to be perfect, no, better than perfect, no—tonight had to be a miracle. For the angel of his dreams had agreed to go on a date with him—him! This shambles of a cook on a pirate ship, a man who spent more time flirting than actually dating someone, and you had said yes!
Life had truly never smiled kinder on him than on this day. The weather? Perfect. Restaurant? Already chosen and reservation secured. The two of you would enjoy a beautiful table on the balcony overlooking the sea, just at peak sunset. He already mapped out two different dessert options within walking area if you decided you were in the mood for a sweet treat after leaving the restaurant—a bakery and an ice cream shop.
His palms were sweaty as he adjusted his tie around his neck, double checking his cuff links and straightening his jacket. Taking a deep breath he emerged from the bathroom to wait for you on the open deck. The sky was a beautiful shade of soft blue already blurring the lines into a peachy-pink in the golden late afternoon light.
Sanji was anxiously twirling his lighter in his hands—a nervous fidget—when a divine being cleared their throat behind him. He spun around, ready with a charming line that died on the tip of his tongue as he openly gaped at you. He felt his breath hitch just looking at you, "You are, glowing," he managed.
A soft blush curled against your delicate cheek. You were dressed in a soft baby blue sundress that tied at the neck, and left your back deliciously open. The smooth expanse of your skin was sure to haunt him as the dress tapered at the waist, then fluffed just slightly to a skirt that ended just above the knee. White flowers were embroidered along the hem in a curling pattern, which flared out as you did a gentle spin to show off the outfit.
"What do you think?" your voice, soft like a ray of sunshine, asked.
Sanji stared at you, his heart having long since given up, his eyes trailed the curves of your form, and he swallowed a lump in his throat. "You are a picture of heaven itself, mon amour," he smoothly recovered, reaching out a hand towards you.
When you graciously accepted, he elegantly clasped it and brought it to his face to place a gentle kiss on your knuckles, "I am truly blessed by the heaven's themselves to find myself with the honor of escorting such a divine being to dinner tonight." He lowers your hand and smiles warmly at you, "The stars must be looking down and smiling brightly on us tonight, my love."
Your laugh rings out like crystal bells as you gently take his offered arm, "Well then, let's not keep the stars waiting, shall we, Sanji?"
He feels his heart swell with joy as the two of you walk along the docks into town. Conversation flowed easily between the two of you, laughter and stories flowing as easy as a smooth river. Your eyes twinkled at his flirtations and charms, and gods above, Sanji was helpless against your eyes. The way they would look at him, full of love and admiration, he would give you the entire world if you asked.
Dinner goes smoothly—he had called ahead and requested a set menu, designed by the head chef with some input on Sanji's end (okay, a lot of input, but he needed tonight to be perfect!) And the two of you dine in the perfect ambience of an ocean-view sunset. The warm colors, delicious food, and exquisite company make for the perfect dinner date. Inwardly, you're swooning over Sanji as he nervously rambles on about the preparation of tonight's meal, talking about his conversations with the chef, and you find yourself delighted in every aspect of this evening. His passion for cooking and food first drew you in when you had met him, but his kindness and soft heart were what sealed the deal for you. Of course, it doesn't hurt that he's nice to look at as well and he has an endless supply of charms and flirty lines to keep you entertained.
A warm smile graces your lips as the two of you stroll idly along the beach, basking in the soft evening light. The last rays of sunshine drift along the shoreline, as soft curl of the sea races to greet you. Sanji looks at you—a bright smile on your face, his jacket draped along your shoulders to combat the evening chill and ocean breeze, you are the picture of absolute bliss and perfection. His hand twitches at his side, and he can't stop himself from reaching for yours to hold.
You feel Sanji's hand reach for yours, and you give it easily, stopping on the beach as the two of you pause. For a moment, only the soft churn of the sea can be heard as the two of you breath in the space. Sanji's ocean eyes meet yours, and he utters a low "Mon dieu," under his breath as he brushes a strand of your hair and tucks it behind your ear.
"Can I kiss you?" his words come out honey-sweet, his eyes flicking down to your soft lips.
Your pulse races as you barely manage to nod, and your own eyes can't decide whether to keep looking into Sanji's beautiful blue eyes or down to his inviting lips. The heat and tension grows between you two as the both of you lean into each other's energies. Sanji dips lower, his hands coming up to cup your face gently as he tenderly kisses you for the first time.
His soft lips against yours feel like heaven on earth, and your arms find themselves naturally tangled around his neck, one hand threaded in his soft blonde hair. You lean into the kiss, truly giving into the bursting in your heart.
Sanji holds you tighter, kisses you sweeter, letting himself drown in his feelings for you. The kiss shifts, and the sudden taste of an intensely salty and bitter seawater causes him to backtrack in sudden and wild confusion.
In his arms, your lovely sundress and jacket are irrevocably soaked through, as if you had just sprung from the ocean itself. You look at him with hollow cheeks and sunken eyes, and his hands feel clammy against your chilled skin.
"My love?" he questions, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
You open your mouth to talk and cough up seawater in return. Through the garbled noises, he can just barely make out—"You did this to me."
"What?" falls from his lips in shock, eyes full of concern.
"Why?" your voice chokes out.
"Why what? What's wrong, mon amour?"
"Why did you let me drown?"
A roaring wave grows behind you along the beach, growing taller and louder, and suddenly, before Sanji can blink, the entire world turns black as the ocean overtakes the two of you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sanji wakes up coughing, eyes blinking open and rapidly clearing the saltwater from his eyes. His lungs ache, and his chest heaves as he rolls over to his side and empties the contents of his stomach. His throat and nose burns from the acidity, and he slumps forward. His mind is running through the mental checklist—and though his entire body aches like it's been personally thrown around like a rag doll, nothing seems to be injured.
Groaning, he forces himself up on his elbows, then into a sitting position, trying to take stock of the situation while also keeping his head from spinning. His hand raked through his hair, trying to wipe the sleep from his eyes. Sanji's entire body ached, his head was pounding and his lungs burned from drowning—or almost drowning.
To his right, someone began stirring and matching his groans. Nami rose slowly after coughing and spluttering seawater, and Zoro followed shortly after. Usopp woke with a gasp and a quick upheaval of his stomach, rolling over and complaining about wanting to go back to bed. Luffy stayed sprawled out, but as Zoro kicked his foot, Luffy simply swatted at him and rolled over in his sleep, murmuring something about meat.
The Going Merry was beached. Horribly. Tilted practically sideways, soft waters lapped at the hull, crates and barrels were shoved against the railing, some even laying in the gray silt after falling overboard.
As the rest of the crew slowly coughed up seawater and tried to stretch the ache away, Zoro sat down next to Sanji in a huff, "So where the hell are we?"
They hadn't ended up on any kind of island, there was no sun, moon, or stars to map their location. At first glance, it looked as though the ship had sailed into some underground cavern—everything was shades of gray. As if this place had never known color, or sunlight, the darkness stretched around them. They were along some kind of beach, if you could call it that, with a gentle wave crawling along the coarse shore, interrupted only by the presence of the Going Merry on its side.
Sanji gave Zoro a look, "Why the hell should I know where we are?"
Zoro shrugged, "Your mysterious light. Your mysterious cavern."
"Dumbass, you think that's how this works?"
Zoro grunted, "Look you're the one seeing things, maybe you see a way out of"—he gestured to all around them, an empty abyss with no way out but forward inland—"whatever the hell this is?"
Sanji gave a long sigh, cradling his pounding head in his hands, "Fuck if I know."
"Well," Nami adds, stretching her arms over her head and getting feeling back in her limbs, "we've been in worse—"
"And weirder!" Usopp chimes in.
"Than this," she finishes. She nods towards Luffy, "Should we try to wake him?"
There's a moment of pause among the crew before Zoro shrugs, "He's still kicking, I say let him sleep it off."
"Plus he's sure to be starving as soon as he wakes and until we survey the ship I've got no idea what our food situation is like," Sanji adds.
"Alright then!" Nami manages to stand, shaking the chill off her bones, "Usopp and I will start working through the ship to see what's salvageable, while you two start, uh, exploring I guess?" She finishes, looking around as the distance seems to expand in every direction. "Just, uh, don't get lost."
"How reassuring," Sanji grumbles before standing and stretching his legs.
Zoro huffs, rolling his eyes, "C'mon chef. Let's go see about this light of yours that dragged us to the bottom of the ocean."
As if on cue, a soft, glowing light faded into view from the opposite direction of their ship, just further inland. Sanji froze, heart pounding, as Zoro leaned towards him, "Well look at that. You're not crazy after all," he whispered sarcastically under his breath.
Sanji couldn't move, couldn't think, and his hands stilled by his sides. What if you were on the other side of that light?
The soft light grew and from the mist came a figure walking slowly towards them. Zoro instinctively laid a hand on the hilt of his swords, and even Nami and Usopp stood at the ready—everyone watching, waiting, to see what would happen.
Sanji felt like his heart would burst, he wanted it to be you, he needed it to be you. He gave a prayer to any god, any force of the universe out there, he had given so much to get back to your side. He would give anything, anything, to be able to hold you in his arms again after all this time.
The figure, shrouded in a mottled cloak, layers on top of layers, a hood keeping their head hidden, strided forward. One hand held the soft orb of light, the pearly colors swirling in place, hovering just so. They moved in silence, only the soft echoes of water hitting the soft beach filled the air. No one spoke, and then the figure stilled a few paces away from the crew.
The tension broke with a laugh that sounded like waves crashing together, wind on a stormy night out at sea—a laugh that stirred a memory in Sanji's mind, though he couldn't name it.
"Well, well, well," the voice cackled, throwing their hood back to reveal a striking face and sharp eyes, "looks like our guests have awoken!" Their grin split across their face, revealing rows of sharp teeth. Sanji felt his stomach churn in disappointment, but even so, he couldn't stop the soft gasp that escaped him. Their beauty struck him all at once—never comparable to your beauty, but beautiful in the same sense of a force of nature. Their eyes were sharp and as dark as the ocean's depths, and their hair flowed down their back to their ankles in soft moving waves, floating as if underwater. They weren't a fishperson, no, but something deeply ancient.
Their eyes clicked with Sanji's, and their grin grew wider. "Oh, oh now this will be fun." They jerked a nod in his direction, "You're the one she called for."
