closed starter for @saudadexmses (for noelle)
continuation of this thread
hearing the remorse in noelle's voice hit javed harder than expected. somehow, even with their history, he hadn't anticipated them expressing regret in return. it had never occurred to him that maybe they also felt sorry for their actions, and the revelation hits him with a force he isn't prepared for.
of course they care, how could javed ever think that was one-sided? their relationship had meant something to both of them, but he had been so fixated on the fact that he hurt them that he forgot noelle likely didn't just hate him. he remembered the love and laughter they shared when they had been together, feelings like that didn't just disappear.
"the truth is...i wasn't happy with her." he admits, eyes lifting to meet their gaze. "she was a match chose by my family, but there was never any affection there. in fact, i was largely despondent in my marriage, being in it made me feel like life had lost it's color. leaving that relationship was one of the better decisions i have made, i can only hope it's by some stroke of luck that i've managed to find you again."
he sighs, pausing before he continues. "but you don't owe me anything, noelle. truly. the fact that you're even willing to sit with me, to talk about this… it's more generosity than i had any right to hope for."