#scarrcdgoalie

[scatcrccio]

@scarrcdgoalie gets a planned thing.

THERE WAS A DISTINCT DISTANCE BETWEEN HER and the other girls. Some of it purposeful on her end and some that weren't. Friendships she once felt she had prior now seemed to dwindle, but she did feel a responsibility as to why they no longer flourished. She was never good at social interactions to begin with and in truth, it had never bothered her until recently. Perhaps it was a selfish thing — 100% selfish — that she found herself wanting to share even the smallest hints of happiness that lingered in her life during this difficult time with someone that might be feeling the same bit of elation. So, as the other girls continued their work on attempting to make or collect some form of food and sustenance, Natalie rose from her current position and made her way towards where Van sat. ❝ Hey. ❞ She stated at first, almost awkwardly with hands slipped between pockets. ❝ Can I talk to you for a minute? ❞

[scatcrccio]

@scarrcdgoalie sent: ❛ did you hurt yourself? ❜

A LIGHT SCOFF WAS HER ONLY RESPONSE AT FIRST, not wanting to make a big deal about the fact she had just cut herself while attempting to skin a rabbit. Probably wasn't the best idea to do so standing, but the hunger was getting to her. A need for some sustenance and protein. ❝ I'm fine. ❞ She says, glancing around towards the other girls for assurance. Once the coast seemed to clear, she leaned towards Van and whispered in her ear, ❝ actually, would you mind? ❞

[fakeddeath]

@scarrcdgoalie : here. something to take the edge off.

⸻ kelly lifted her head, which she'd been resting back against the couch; her eyes opening to find van standing beside her and holding out a glass. it had been a long, stressful day, and ever since she had surprised van in ohio, she found herself showing up at van's apartment (or store) more and more.

kelly thanked van in the form of a delicate smile as she quickly made eye contact, before taking the drink from her. ❛ you really know how to look after a girl. ❜ she chuckled, before bringing the glass to her lips.

[scatcrccio]

“ wanna talk about it? “

YEARS WERE SPENT TALKING ABOUT HER FEELINGS, all the inner workings of her mind and why she tried to continuously silence them. Everything but the core root of her problems because that was the one thing they swore to never speak about again. Not to each other, not to anyone. Natalie glares over at Van, staring them down as if their very presence was an enigma in itself, regardless of how comforting it actually was. But to talk in truth meant going against every factor of her self-worth and being. If there was even one person who could understand, it'd be Van.

❝ Talk about what, exactly? ❞

@scarrcdgoalie

[scatcrccio]

❛  i trusted you, and you betrayed me.  ❜ / hello !!

❝ I BETRAYED YOU, ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW—? ❞ A million things to say and yet, she has no idea where to even begin with such a horrendous accusation. From Van of all people to feel betrayed by her, that was not on her bingo card. Then again, nothing within this past year was. Nothing in her life, for that matter, but she's still standing tall and ready to face anything thrown at her at any given moment. But this, this was a low blow.

@scarrcdgoalie

[bledthrus-arc]

@scarrcdgoalie  prayed  to  the  altar. re  -  do  by  modern  baseball   ♱   van  palmer.

❝  the  future  freaks  me  out,   but  i  guess  i  could  just  curl  up  in  a  ball  and  think,  ❞   mari  says,   dejected  in  the  way  she  sits  at  the  small  table  in  the  cabin.   their  summer  in  the  wilderness  had  stretched  on,   long  and  almost  pleasant  in  its  warmth,   long  since  replaced  by  the  frigid  cold  and  heavy  snow  of  the  winter.   the  longer  they're  out  here,   the  more  mari  thinks  they  just  might  all  die  out  here,   isolated  from  everything  else  they  once  knew.   she  tries  not  to  sink  into  the  hopelessness,   tries  to  carry  on  each  day  with  her  head  held  up  high,   but  the  cold  seeps  in  through  from  the  outdoors.   it  seeps  into  her  bones,   and  oh  how  she  misses  the  warm  blankets  from  her  bed  and  the  heater  at  home.   she  sighs,   looks  up  at  van  with  brown  eyes  wide  and  vulnerable  and  knees  pulled  up  to  her  chest  for  some  extra  semblance  of  warmth.   ❝  i  mean,   how  much  longer  do  we  have  to  be  out  here  for ?   is  anyone  even  still  looking  for  us  or  do  they  think  we're  all  dead ?   i'm  so  sick  of  it  here.  ❞

[silencedrage]

The bell above her shop door jingles as she lets herself in, each step slow and heavy and deliberate. Van stands just inside the doorway to take it all in as the door swings shut behind her. It wasn't much, a little over a thousand square feet that crammed in a bunch of sturdy shelves and countless tapes that she'd curated herself over the last decade and a half. It's a living memory to a time that she doesn't know how to get back, but she also doesn't know how to stop trying. Except now, there's finally an end in sight.

The words circle in her head on a loop as she continues to her apartment over the store. 'Terminal. Caught it too late. Nothing we can do.' She has to laugh, right? Because what possible other reaction is there to surviving everything they did out there, just to fall to this. But she doesn't laugh, doesn't cry, just leans heavily against the sink in her bathroom and stares at her scarred reflection in the reflection of her mirror. Usually, she hates doing this, but Van doesn't have the energy to do anything other than trace the scars that line her face. "Get a grip, Palmer," she says aloud finally. "You just gonna sit here feeling sorry for yourself?" Her voice wavers a little and she angrily swipes at the burning in her eyes, finally signaling the arrival of some kind of emotion. "Fuck me." / @scarrcdgoalie

[seatizen]

“ Where’d you learn to do that? ”

“Self taught,” he explained as he finished tying the rope to the cleat. “Nautical life called me and I answered. There was a lot to learn before I actually bought it,” he explained leading @scarrcdgoalie into the boat. “I bought so many books on sailing, I still have some of them in my mother’s basement. Can I get you something to drink? I’ve got Mountain Dew and Tahitian Treat. I might be able to make some iced tea, but I'm not sure it will be any good.” He hadn’t seen them in so long, there was so much for them to catch up on.