I kinda wanted to combine sleep, garden and chimkens all in one hehe.
I thought it would be cute to have a little thing where Mychael and MC go out to the garden and get some tomatoes, taking the ~ladies~ on a lil' adventure but then all of them just fall asleep after sitting down.
I also kinda figured that MC would def be the type to drool, considering how Mychael has to SHOVE them awake everyday lol. They are OUT.
It's still may for me and my timezone hahehehhehehehe, IT COUNTS.
Etiquette Expert: Welcome to Genetic Engineering and Complicated Protocol Planet! The social rules about sex here are soooo complex, but that's never gonna come up because they're too xenophobic to mess with offworlders.
Himbo Cousin Ivan: Bet.
Himbo Cousin Ivan proceeds to get drugged with a floppy dick drug and then, by losing at sex, win at sex so comprehensively that he is flooded with illicit invitations for the duration of the adventure.
Meanwhile our buddy Miles is swooning in unrequited infatuation for 90% of the women he sees and simultaneously playing 4D chess against both murderous adversaries and his own allies, thus averting several different possible interplanetary crises through the power of reckless scheming.
Being in a secret relationship with your best friend and coworker is hard, and it’s even harder when you’re both in the public eye. But with a little help from your friends, you find that loving each other out loud is worth more than all the potential hate combined.
TW: Fear of homophobia and hate, Y/N usage (twice), slight disagreement between main couple, insecurities, seven minutes in heaven used as a confession mechanism, mention of nudes (boob pics), making out and heavy petting, innuendos, reader would wait forever for angela, shourtney being the blueprint
All that I know is I want you forever
And nothing like this could be wrong
If people on Earth think that they know us better than we do
Then I'll live on the moon with you
If we lived on the moon - vivi rincon
The annual Smosh Pride Party was a big deal. People had been talking about it nonstop for the past month. So when the day came and you suddenly found yourself surrounded by streamers and balloons, you were buzzing with excitement, just like everyone else at the office. You had a rum and coke in your hand, comfortably perched on the arm of the Games couch when you felt a warm presence pull you into a hug. You felt yourself nearly purr at the touch of your girlfriend of six months.
“Hey Ange, what’s up?”
“Missed you.” She mumbled into your shoulder, her vodka cran precariously balanced in her hand.
“I missed you too.” You giggled. The sound of her tipsy voice was like music to your ears. She got extra clingy when she was drunk, which made it easy to play off her endless affection for you as just friendship.
Tommy gave you a knowing look from where he was sipping his drink. He was the only one who knew about the two of you besides Ian and Anthony, due to an unfortunate incident where he had been too nosy and read Angela’s texts to you over her shoulder one game night, getting an eyeful of your tits (via photo) in the process.
You weren’t ashamed, you had good boobs, and Angela was extremely inclined to agree, but that didn’t make the interrogation portion any less awkward. In the end, he not only agreed you had good boobs (a win in your book) but also to keep it a secret, on the condition that he could start a betting pool.
Angela started placing kisses along your neck and shoulders, and you reluctantly pried her off of you. “Be careful, someone will see.”
“Maybe I want them to see.”
You shook your head and she went quiet. “We talked about this, and you didn’t want to in case it got posted somewhere, so we can’t.”
You watched her shift uncomfortably before sighing. “Fine, I’m going to go somewhere else then to resist… this menace.” She gestured to you in your tight tank top and mini skirt. “Don’t get into too much trouble without me.”
“No promises.” She smiled and rubbed your shoulder before walking off. As soon as she turned away from you, you deflated like an empty balloon and took a large swig of your drink.
“She doesn’t want to tell people?” Tommy asked, looking at the tears welling in your eyes.
You took another drink to steady yourself. “It’s not that. She just doesn’t want online stuff to ruin everything by tearing into my private life too, she claims it’s ‘already ruined hers’ enough. She’s worried that us in the background of one thing could send people after me for dating her, not to mention how certain people would feel about two women being an out and proud couple on screen.” Tommy nodded pensively, letting you continue. “She means well. I just can’t help but want to love her out loud. And I know she feels the same, but she’s had the weight of people’s negative comments on her shoulders for years, so she wants to be careful.”
“But?”
“But it hurts still, especially on nights like tonight where everyone except us can be out and themselves. I wanted to announce it to everyone and be able to celebrate tonight, but she made too many good points for me to ignore.”
“So you’re going to wait until she’s ready?”
You nodded, leaning your head back against the cushion. “Of course I will.”
—------
In the next room, Angela was nursing her drink in silence. She wanted to enjoy the music, the drinks, and all the people, but all she could think about was the resigned look on your face and the hurt in your eyes.
Court came over and bumped shoulders with her. “What’s got you so low?”
Angela sighed deeply before looking at them. “How did you know to tell everyone about you and Shayne?”
“Like everyone everyone? Or just the people we knew?”
“Both?”
“It was gradual and scary. But eventually the pain of staying secret outweighed the terror of telling everyone. It nearly tore us apart.” Angela frowned, she couldn’t imagine either of her friends without the other. “I was so scared of telling people, and we fought so much because of it, and I realized I had to decide between keeping him and telling everyone, or telling no one and losing him.”
“And you chose him.”
“Obviously.” Court looked across the room where Shayne was wheezing, doubled over at something Damien had said. “I couldn’t imagine my life without him. It was hard, but it was worth it. I would do it again in a heartbeat.”
Angela was quiet for a moment, almost to a concerning degree, when she spoke up again. “Can I tell you something?”
“Of course my love.”
“Y/N and I have been dating for six months, and she wants to tell everyone. And I’m scared people knowing will mess everything up. I love her too much to lose her Court.”
Courtney had to hold in a squeal, but regained their composure. “It’ll be a big change, but I think the two of you can do it. We’re all here for you.”
“She wanted to do it tonight. I want to do it tonight, but at this point, I don’t know how. And I want to talk to her before we tell everyone, but there’s nowhere quiet around.”
Courtney thought for a moment. “I have an idea.”
—-------
Subtlety was dead and gone when it came to the Smosh Cast. Courtney found a megaphone and loudly announced, “It’s time for Truth or Dare! Anyone who doesn’t join is respected but also heavily shamed!”
She dragged Angela back onto the games set, shoving her onto the couch between you and Spencer, who were having a heated conversation about which Zelda game was the best. She slammed into the cushions with a soft ‘oof’.
“That looked like it hurt.”
“Not really, just knocked the wind out of me a little.” She flashed you a grin. “Hi.”
“Hi.”
Spencer pretended to vomit behind her and you shot him a glare. He mouthed ‘Just kiss already’ and you mouthed ‘Fuck you’ back. Angela was zoned out watching Courtney wrangle everyone who wanted to play into the room like a cattle dog, running back and forth across the set. When she finally got everything settled, she started the game.
“Spencer, truth or dare?” There was a mischievous twinkle in their eye.
“Dare.”
“I dare you to give Shayne a lap dance.”
Spencer groaned and stood up, trying (and failing) to walk seductively over to Shayne, who was laughing so hard he was halfway off his chair, then did the most lackluster hip wiggle you’d ever seen.
Before long, the entire room was committed to the bit, trading truths and dares back and forth rapid fire. You finally had stopped laughing enough to take a deep breath and reapply your lipgloss when Court addressed you.
“Y/N, truth or dare?”
“Dare?”
Her eyes narrowed. “Seven minutes in Heaven. You. Angela. Closet.” She pointed to the prop closet in the corner. “Have fun!”
Your eyes widened. “What?”
Angela stood up and grabbed your hand, helping you up. Quietly, she said, “It’ll be okay, promise.”
“Okay.”
As soon as the door shut behind the two of you, Angela looked at you through heavily lidded eyes. “We should tell them.”
“Ange, you know we can’t."
She put her forehead against yours, squeezing your hands tight. “I talked to Court, and they made me realize that you are more important to me than what anyone on the internet thinks. I’m so incredibly scared, but I love you too much to keep this to ourselves anymore. And everyone here? They’re our friends, and they all looked thrilled that we went into this closet together. And even if they didn’t approve, this is our relationship and our life together, not theirs.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“And you want to tell them by making out?”
“Not necessarily, but I’ve wanted to kiss you all night and I don’t think I can go back now that I have you here. You look absolutely gorgeous honey.”
You paused for a moment to give her another out. “You’re sure you’re sure about this? There’s no going back.”
She put her arms around your waist and you breathed in, smelling her jasmine perfume. “I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”
You surged forward, kissing her deeply just like you had been patiently waiting for all evening. The strawberry lipgloss you were wearing mixed with the taste of cranberry and lime on her tongue, creating an intoxicating mix you swore you’d be addicted to for the rest of your life. She pushed you up against the wall, caging you in, but you needed her closer. You pulled her flush to you by her belt and slipped your hand into her pocket. You felt her grin as you started to kiss her neck, grinding against her slowly.
“You’re so needy baby.”
“So are you.”
Somewhere in the distance a timer went off. When neither of you responded to the calls of the group, Court took it upon themself to open the door. They weren’t entirely surprised by what they saw.
They wolf whistled loudly, half out of feigned shock and half to get your attention. “Damn! Get it babes!”
At the sudden bright light, Angela pulled away from you, running a hand through her hair. “There’ll be more of that at home later, promise.” She winked at you and you fought off a whine. Her white shirt was unbuttoned at the top, collar covered in your lipgloss, and the sight of it made you want to pull the door back shut.
You took a second to fix your own shirt as the two of you looked at the crowd of your flabbergasted friends, then you took her hand.
“Uh, we wanted to tell you guys something. We’ve been dating for six months.” You watched Amanda grumble goodnaturedly and hand a $20 bill to Chanse.
“We wanted to wait to tell you guys because well, everyone knows Chanse has a big mouth.” He threw a pillow at her and it hit her in the knee. “But mostly because I was scared of what everyone would think. But Court reminded me that some people are worth doing things scared for.” She looked at you fondly and you leaned your head on her shoulder.
“So you decided to do it by making us watch you make out?” Spencer raised an eyebrow.
“I didn’t make you do anything, if you watched that’s your own deal.”
Amanda ruffled his hair. “Damn, someone’s in trouble. Next time ask before you watch two girls kiss Spence, this isn’t porn.”
“I can never have anything nice here.”
You laughed and led her back to your spot next to him on the couch. “Personally I think you should pay us for a premium viewing experience. Especially during Pride Month.”
He groaned and slid to the floor. “Next time do your ‘premium viewing experience’ at home instead of at work.”
Angela grinned and grabbed your chin, kissing you again. She cuddled into you like a big blanket, and you smeared one of the pink kiss marks on her cheek with your thumb. “No can do. No more hiding.”
She hummed happily. “No more hiding.”
A/N: Shout out to my emotional support lipgloss for inspiring me on this one. It truly goes with me everywhere. My cups are always stained pink on the rim.
Scheming something special for @theineffablecon! On a scale from total indifference to drawing your own version of the book cover, how do you feel about Good Omens?
